Breaking up sucks, make your story heard!
I have yet to go wrong on a “gut feeling” when it comes to a disaster with a significant other. I somehow can sense the bomb going off but never in time to defuse it. The most recent example was by a lovely lady I was seeing for several months. She and I did not land on solid ground due to the conditions of our start. We shared many laughs, cries, and plenty about each other during that time. I was hesitant at first about her feelings at first, not knowing if they were true or just brought up by the circumstances of her previous relationship. We shared a wild, strong sexual appetite during the first half of our relationship. Facing personal dilemmas and financial difficulties; she pursued a second job in which she could balance herself with. She quickly got an offer to work a gentlemen’s club as a coat checker. I saw the potential for disaster, keeping in mind her personality, state of mind, and lack of experience with the world. I feared that I might lose her in the process to some money throwing pig. Yet I needed to keep my personal fears in check and support who I regarded as my babe with anything she set her mind to. If this one thing could break us, than all my suspicions would be true; if they don’t than we could move forward, take the leap into going public with our relationship.
Several weeks later we began to drift apart, we would ignore mutual calls and text. We did not see each other for days at a time. I began to worry about us, and so I began to call her more often, asking how she was and brought up ideas on trips we could take. It had little to no affect, as her eyes and perhaps even her heart were set on someone else whom she met at the gentlemen’s club. One evening we got into an argument; and just like that, she asked me never to speak to her again; without any hesitation on my part, I hung up. The next day I told her we needed to talk; it was important that we clear the air. No response ever came that day, or the next day, or the day after. I tried once more and she quickly delivers the blow “I need time” which we all know to be “break-up mode”. I tried and tried again to see her so we could talk, all while sensing the inevitable blow that was soon to come. I would go to her apartment late at night, and she and her truck wouldn’t be there. I knew that I had lost her at this point; or maybe just 99%. I took a chance and went to her one last time; even after she told me not to. I gave her everything that she ever wanted, with a promise to be there always. She wasn’t giving in, she could not see being with me being better than the guy that she met recently. I knew that my words were barely chipping away at her wall. She was cold all throughout this and yet at the end she hugged me and showed me signs of remorse or sympathy. Before she walked back in I asked her, if in this last moment, we could turn things around and try to work this out with a clean slate. Her lips said no, but in her eyes, I saw a glimmer of yes. Despite what I felt, she gave me the closure I had asked her for. I wished her the best, and reminded her that I would always have her in my heart. Got in my car, and I had the most difficult drive of my life.
Tags: Blindsided Breakup
I had met her about two years ago at school. She was new in town since she just moved from Colorado. After about a year later I started getting invited to her parties and to her house to watch a movie or something. For the sake of privacy her name will be Rosie. We had only begun to be serious about Fall of 2013. I had committed to seeing her father monthly to talk with him about her. There was one problem. Rosie's family was a strong Christian family while I always had trouble with faith so I retained an Atheist standpoint. However, I was accepted by her family as long as I tried to adapt a Christian lifestyle. I blindly accepted the task and was given permission to date her. Now, I had issues at the time. I hadn't been able to see a purpose in life and constantly thought about suicide. Once I told her she helped me through it and those thoughts left me alone. We would sit on the school balconies holding hands as she talked me through it. We officially started dating on January 20th, 2014. Everything seemed fine with us. And I like to think that it was. Those times were the best in my life. I was convinced that even though it doesn't happen, she would be my first and my last. Oh how I was wrong. We had our first argument about a week ago so around July 1st or 2nd. I was in Europe at the time so I couldn't talk with her face to face. The issue was that I was a constant pessimist. That she couldn't be happy when she was with me. I didn't understand since I always had a negative view on events. I told her that once I get back that we would meet and make amends. So we did. Yesterday. July 7th, 2014. She came over to my house and we had a great time. At the end of the day we talked about what was wrong. I asked if I could have time to work on it and I was granted it. Then her phone buzzed letting know her parents were on their way. She sighed and looked at me. Right then she dropped the bomb. "I think we should break up". I couldn't move anymore. The day had been great, I had been as positive as I could be. I was calm. I asked why. "I can't be happy with you and I can't be with someone who has different views as I do". I was shocked. Then the pleading began. Everything I said was shut down. Then her third and final reason arose, "I feel like I'm replaceable in your life". After all we had gone through it was unbelievable. Then I knew that this was her parents doing. Before I could say anything more she was out the door. I ran to the other room where I had a gift from Europe for her, I wanted her to take it. So I wouldn't have to hold on to it, but once I made it out of the door she wasn't there. Dumbfounded, I sat on the front porch and cried. Like I never had before. She left me with the lingering questions of why I didn't get a second chance and what went wrong today. Since I haven't been able to sleep tonight, I read up on the worst kinds of break ups. I found my own at number one, the blindsided break up. She had been convinced since we argued that I wasn't the one and I was led to believe everything was alright before I was shot with some of the worst words you'll ever hear. That same day...she held my hand, hugged me, and said that she loved me.
My boyfriend of a year and a half broke up with me because "we don't have enough in common" and he "needs someone with similar interests". We had a really great relationship at first but at he started hating everything I did. He would yell about my driving, hated that I don't like to cook, and would imply that I'm stupid. I'm just having a hard time dealing with the fact that he acted completely in love with me and then just realized he didn't want to be with me one day. I'm just at the point where I feel like every other guy I will date will get sick of me like this one.
I met my ex-girlfriend on an online dating website and things got serious pretty quickly. She had bipolar disorder but was not getting treated. She lived with her parents and had a rocky relationship with her domineering and controlling mother. I always got the impression that her parents viewed my ex-girlfriend as a disappointment in comparison to her two older sisters who were both married with their own families. It seemed like her parents were happy with just about anybody who take my ex-girlfriend off her hands.
Initially I got along with her parents. I attended family gatherings, holidays and even went on a vacation with them. Over time, however, things changed. It started during a dinner we had with her parents. Her mother had a habit of scolding my ex-girlfriend about seemingly petty things. Even though it was an awkward situation that was uncomfortable, her mother was very unapologetic and instead got upset at me for not talking.
After two years together, we started to run into some problems. My ex-girlfriend was pressuring me into getting engaged, mainly so she could get my health insurance and get treated for her bipolar disorder. She even talked about eloping first so she didn’t have to wait to claim my insurance. I started to feel that the relationship was a little one-sided. We practically spent all of our free time together and I was bothered she never showed much interest in any of my hobbies and was always very vocal about how stupid they were. Another problem were her mood swings which often lead to arguments, which occasionally took place in public places.
After we broke up, I went out on my own while my ex-girlfriend immediately jumped into another relationship. Also during that time, her parents sort of relented and allowed her to get treated for her bipolar disorder. After a few months, we both realized that we still had feelings for each other and decided to get back together, promising that things would be different.
At first not everyone was excited that we were back together, mainly her parents. They were upset because they believed her new boyfriend would’ve eventually married her and because they believed I had caused my ex-girlfriend’s mood swings. My ex-girlfriend’s mother was upset at me over an incident that happened a year ago that never occurred. Even though my ex-girlfriend believed her, I was suspicious of her mother.
Initially everything seemed to be going great. The relationship was a lot more balanced and because my ex-girlfriend was taking medication she wasn’t getting those mood swings that plagued us last time. Around the holidays, things started to turn. I was driving my ex-girlfriend to the airport and my car got a flat tire. As I pulled into the gas station, she started screaming at me, like she did before she was taking her medication. It was so bad that the attendants felt sorry for me and gave me the replacement tire for free. Even though my ex-girlfriend wrote off the incident as holiday-related stress, it was the first indication that something wasn’t right.
Over the next month, my ex-girlfriend continued to act erratically and decided to break up with me on Valentine’s Day, only to change her mind the following day and the same pattern would occur every few weeks. Also during that time, my ex-girlfriend discovered that her mother had tricked her into not taking her bipolar medication and had told her doctor that she no longer needed them causing her doctor to believe she was misdiagnosed.
Eventually, my ex-girlfriend’s mother began to act even more coldly towards me. During an argument over the phone, I overheard her mother screaming in background and demanded that she break up with me and get it over with. Every time I saw her mother, I tried to be friendly or polite to her but she either scowl at me or storm out of the room. She continued to badmouth me and even made bizarre accusations about me. She claimed that I wasn’t serious about getting married and claimed that I was gay. She even told family members that she didn’t think that I was a nice person.
By the spring, my ex-girlfriend’s mood swings started to get worse. One night, my ex-girlfriend had too much to drink and she started grinding against me at a restaurant. After I quietly pushed her off of me and told her to stop, she started screaming at me and eventually pushed me out the door. When I returned, she continued to scream at me and had to be told to leave by the manager.
On the way home, I told her we were finished but she wanted to talk. She asked for another chance and promised to stop drinking. When I wouldn’t reconsider, she got upset demanded that I get out of her car and kicked me in my ribs and threw a half empty wine bottle out the window. The following day, she changed her mind and tried to convince me to give her another chance. After she got her friends to contact me, I felt like I had no choice but to give in.
In the following weeks. My ex-girlfriend’s mood swings got worse and she even got pushy and demanding. When I tried breaking up with her again, she again forced me to reconsider and sometimes held me hostage in her house until I reconsidered. Personally I felt trapped. When my ex-girlfriend and I got back together, this was not what I had envisioned. Now I felt depressed and noticed that I had gained weight.
I decided that I needed an outlet for my feelings and decided to sign up for an obstacle course race. My ex-girlfriend immediately thought it was a dumb idea and was upset that I ask her permission. She also hated that I joined a Sunday softball league with a friend, even though she worked on that day. She always expected me to stay home and meet with her after she got off of work.
The night before the race, my ex-girlfriend decided to rehash an old argument about how she felt that I wasn’t committed to her and believed her mother was about me. The argument continued as I was driving her home and when I tried to break up with her again, she lost her temper and started hitting me over the head with a book as I was driving. Afterwards, I was forced to change my mind after she refused to leave my car. The following week, I finally broke up with my ex-girlfriend after I cancelled my plans with her and she furiously berated me on the phone. Unlike last summer, this was for good.
In the months that followed, my ex-girlfriend continued to try to contact me.
Sometimes she scolded me for breaking up with her and occasionally she begged for another chance. She even would scream at remaining mutual friends when they wouldn’t tell her any information they had on me. I also learned that she was in a serious car accident that some of her friends believe might been a suicide attempt. Eventually, she stopped trying to contact me and I learned that she had started dating another guy and was once again taking bipolar medication.
As for me, I rediscovered how to have fun again. I made a lot of new friends on the softball team I joined that summer. It helped that we won the championship and I ended up making the game winning catch. I also lost 50 pounds and have since competed in 3 more obstacle course races. I even started dating again and am currently in the early stages of a new relationship. It’s been fun and I can't remember the last time I felt this happy or excited about my life.
Basically, I was dating this guy for a year. We gave our virginity to each other. We said "I love you". (We were in college btw...I'm 23) We met each other's family. We were both each other's most serious relationship. He acted like he was head over heels in love with me....he would say it and show it. Anyway, we were serious......then he breaks up with me.....doesn't really give me a reason.....Oh! and he does it while we are at my parents' house during Thanksgiving/Christmas holidays....I had to drive him back to the apartment to get his things. He leaves. I never heard from him again. My friends (who were his friends too......oh he basically broke up with them as well) tried to ask him to give me more explanation or something because I wasn't handling it well.....and he said, "She can mess up her life is she wants. It's not my problem". He's now in a relationship with a new girl. And you may ask, is this a habit of his? Well, he has had a decent number of girlfriends before. I'm the only one he has done this to. There are sooooo many more details involved in this story, but I'm sparing y'all from them. So yeah.....that happened to me.
Last night my boyfriend of a year and 11 months told me he hadn't loved me for a few months and that he no longer wished to be with me anymore. He said he loved me as a friend though... then he hugged me said "you'll be okay pal..." and left me in his apartment to collect my things while he took a walk. I get a text from him this morning saying you forgot some things should i throw them out or do you want to pick them up. I never saw it coming. I mean we had fought a few times but never about anything alarming to our relationship. I have spent all night and day in bed crying because I seriously believe the love of my life just left me and he's not coming back....ever.
Tags: bad breakup
I have had the same boyfriend for five years I left him for three months because I needed a break to focus on school.
He would hit me up everyday begging for me to take him back and he was sorry for treating me badly. After three months I gave in and took him back. Everything was going well until I found out he was talking to someone else which I didnt mind we werent together and he said that he didnt tell her we were back together and he would end it now. I trusted him and he claimed he ended it. It never ended comes to show that he was in a realtionship with her a month before we got back together he fought for her and denied me. He said hes been single the past five years, I am crazy, He doesn't want me, that i ruined his life and all these things to everyone. He actually denied me when I gave him everything I had I sacrificed so much for him career wise, school wise, family wise, and he broke my heart. He denies it all still but still reaches out to me and says hes sorry and claims he is alone. The girl told me stop trying to steal her man and posts pictures of them everyday I HATE HIM he blaimed me for everything he claimed if i never left him this wouldnt have happened to begin with what hurts the most is he was the one i planned to do everything with and the girl claims i was stilling her man they only been together two months and he takes her to family functions and i feel like i lost out he calls me still and as much as i want to tell the other girl look what ur man is doing cuz she boast to everyone he chose her n he is living with her after a month n he denies it all when there are piks everywhere and my name is destroyed now and my reputation i never deserved that I stopped answering him and deleted him everywhere but keeps claiming he needs me he is alone suffering but is in a relationship with her I just want to feel better I cant believe he would deny me :'(he told her he was living with his mom when he has his own place and because of me she found out about his place and he started to take her there he just replaced me n the girl flaunts it every chance she getshe hit me abused me verbally emotionally he cheated on me so I left him he keeps trying to hit me up but is still with the girl he cheated on me with I don't want him but she's insecure cuz he still wants me n suck of her so she keeps harassing me in every possible way I blocked her everywhere but she found old sexts ok his phone n saying she gonna use them against me how do I cope I've prayed n prayed my heart is so heavy
Ok so this all started last year in P.E and my best friend was dating this guy in our PE class and they dated for like a week or so. Then she broke up with him because he was a bad kisser and some other reasons too. after they broke up me and him became closer friends bc i always comfort my friends after they broke up. me and my best friend would talk about him and stuff and why it didnt work out but me and him would always talk about our day and things like that. lets just say his name is Justin. well the day after we got out of school me and Justin stayed up talking to each other and he seemed down so i asked him wts wrong and he said he wanted love and i said from who and he said from me and he told me he liked me. i was shocked bc i didnt like him like that. he said i always flirted with him but i didnt even notice i thought i was being a good friend. i told him i dont feel like that about u and he said ok. from then on we would wake up and text each other until dinner time and its was fun. then one day he asked me out and i said yes. then i realized i couldnt just go out with my best friends ex cuz thats not cool so the next morning i told him i couldnt do it. so then we were just friends again. then he tells me hes moving and he wants to see me and go to the movies. i said i would go but he ended up moving early. as the school year started again he was telling me about his new school and how all the girls were after him and it kinda made me jealous. then around homecoming time one of his friends asks me out and i said no and i told Justin and he seemed a little jealous about it but not that much. then Justin asked me out and i said yes. we date for a month and some days then he got mad that i didnt do something he wanted me to do so he broke up with me. instead of crying i laughed about. but when we talked again and he wanted to talk about it i started crying bc it hurt. and to this day he still loves me and will do anything for me but he broke my heart into pieces and i dont know if i could ever forgive that.
My boyfriend and I where so happy with eachother, and we would still be together if not for his racist father. My boyfriend first told his parents that we where dating a couple of days in our relationship. His fucking dad flipped out because I was half black. He made racist remarks and said that he was disappointed with his own son for dating a black girl. My boyfriends MOM on the other hand has a wide open mind. She was sorta happy for him and me. The problem was that my boyfriends parents where constantly fighting because of us dating. It got to the point where my boyfriend couldn't take it anymore. He was forced to break up with me. I could tell that he was heartbroken and hell I was too. Still am, I haven't heard from him since and it's been a couple of days.
Ok so this boy lets call him matthew ok so i liked him for about two months and he was ny best friends boy best friends so one day she formally introduced us so he said i was cute then he told her that he really liked me and then from there he picked me up from school and he would hug me and then we were best friends then i guess she told him that i was going to ask him out so i when to the store and he came with me he was just keeped huging me and he was being nice so jhe he told the store dude that i was really cute and that i was his girl and my face turned red so did his and we was walking and he said that if i was going to asked him something i said no then he said i already know what oit is and i was so scared like my stomach keeped having butterflies and i said i cant do it then he said ok will you go out with i said yeah!then he said just yeah then i said i mean yes he just started laughing and he walked me home he said bye babe i said bye<3 then the next day he came with ne to pick up my brother and sister from school and he hugged me and grabbed me and gave nme a tight hug and then he kissed me on my cheak and on Friday my aunt was baby sitting us and she said i can go see him i said thanks so much love you and then u when over to my friends house and she took me out side we when alot of places so after he came and he wasnt talking to me and he he said cece sat on my lap and fell asleep on me btw(cece is my best friends name) i was like what why then i said iyts ok and they were like brother and sister after that he inboxed me and said its over then i said its ok but why not tell me in person don't be less of a man and tell me over facebook. he said that he didn't want to see me cry i said im not crying and then we just stopped fighting i said can we be friends after a week bc it was our one month anniversary and he was yeah i would like that so we stared being friends but then my other best friend told me that he called me a side hoe and he told everyone that he asked out my other best friends so i asked him he said no and then over spring break he asked me out being the dumbass that i am i said yes this time we made it a whole month and then one day. My guy best friend told me he saw my cece and Matthew making out and holding hands i told him he keeped denying it so be for i could say it was over he told me first so the week after he called me his side hoe and i meant nothing to him so now that im dating this boy he wants to get mad and then he asked out my beast friends both of them and they when out then broke up and then him and my other best friend and him when out he told me the only reason that he is dating her is to get back at me
But now that i found someone new he told nme that he loved me and i told him no so now everyday he rides his bike to my house and saids hi and me being nice a say hi back but i told all of them that karma is a bitch and he ended up in love with me and. Doesn't like anyone eles
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