Breaking up sucks, make your story heard!
I haven’t had much experience with serious relationships but this is one of the hardest things I've done. I would really appreciate some feedback from outside sources since I'm a popular guy but few people to go to in this city and certainly no shoulder to cry on.
Last night I broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years; a girl I admire and daresay love (in many ways), who upon graduating, fought her hateful parents and moved to the city where I studied to complete my late ass degree. Free rent to help pay her loans and good job opportunities out of the question, she moved here to work to survive just to live with me.
We’re both 22 now, and we have known each other for a little over 2 years. Because of her anxiousness to date and my cautiousness it took us about 6 months to go from friends to official.
Moving in after a year was scary enough but done so that we could stay together. This loving girl knew she wanted me forever from the first few months. I was new to the whole relationship scene, and rather unsure. Naturally the thought that she was scared the crap out of me.
But we moved in, and as expected there were some rough nights. We were far from perfect, and her dependence on me paired with her inherent need to ‘have the final say’ on everyday issues tested my rationality regularly. In spite of a few terrible nights where we swore we were done, the year as roommates ended far better than expected. We had learned a lot about living with one another and grown our love. This was mostly because she did everything possible to be the perfect girl, she: is caring, generous, and sweet beyond belief, cooks fantastic meals, adopts new styles, and always promoted a good sex life. Still I felt unhappy – for a reason that was not immediately clear. I loved her, but I also restrained my interests for her sake at times. I feel that this is normal, but I also feel young and that there is much I want to do before I make the necessary sacrifices that come with commitment. In short - I felt that everything was moving too fast.
She never stopped pressuring me into the thing she wanted most from me - a promise. This was something that I couldn't give until I felt ready. She plans to have the security of an engagement ring within the next couple of years, and reminds me of that regularly. I love her, but this is my life too!
With what looks like 2 or 3 years before a real career begins for me, being ready to propose seems half a decade away. I tell her I want to enjoy the relationship we have and continue to work on it and grow together. When I talk to her about the pressure her sacrifices put on me she says she wants someone to match the love –and commitments- that she shows. Unfortunately I can't do that, and although I love her, I have to let her go.
Our timing was cruelly wrong, and I think it is finally time to stop ignoring that fact and use the time to explore myself and my desires. She could be the one, but that’s just not something I can decide yet.
My ex boyfriend and I broke up about 2 and a half years ago, but all this time we never stopped talking. We remained in a sexual relationship all this time. During this time he treated me poorly, then we would fight and then he would treat me better... until the next fight. He always knew what to say and how to act to calm me down and convince that he cared for me. During this time he talked to 3 other girls, and in all the occasions I told him I didn't want to talk to him anymore, but he would insist in staying in my life. We had a bad fight in all three occasions and then once things started not working out with the girl he would apologize saying he recognized he didn't treat me well. I have asked him several times to stay away, to let me go, and he would for a couple of weeks but then he would come back and I was enough of an idiot to let him back in. Well in December I told him we should stop seeing each other, then he said "ok" but soon started messaging me saying he wanted to see me once I got home from Christmas break. Then we hung out a couple of times in January, but then he started being really rude to me so I told him to not talk to me anymore. We hadn't talked to me in a while and then I (was being stupid again) texted him saying I was ok with us not talking but I wanted to understand why. Then he replied "get over me, i'm talking to a girl in high school" (detail: we are both 22 and college students). I laughed because that's just pathetic. Well the next week I saw him at a dance at our college, and I was a little tipsy and in a bad mood and angry at him so I walked by him and pumped into him. He texted me all angry, but then the next morning he was being all sweet saying I look beautiful at the dance and that he wanted to see me. So I said "what about your high schooler?" then he replied "Oh I lied, I just said that to piss you off". I knew he was lying about that, I know he actually talked to her and I knew she had probably dumped him already. Well,I didn't let him come over to my apartment. I didn't want to see him at all. Then I realized on his twitter that he was talking to her again so I asked him "why did you lie about not talking to her?" then he answered "i don't have to explain anything to you" (wow, dick). Well after that we talked a couple more times and then I noticed there was nothing wrong because of some things he posted on twitter. Then we were talking and he said someone screwed things up. Well it was obviously her. Then a few days later I drove by his house (which is right across from my apartment) and I saw a car there, so I asked if it was hers and he said yes. Well I got pissed out and said terrible things to him. We argued bad, I told him he was nothing to me, and I regretted having let him in back in my life so many times, he got really mad when I said that and then he told me he didn't want to talk to me anymore. Then the next day we argued again and this time he told me "shut up, don't talk to me, don't talk about me, and don't talk about her". I know I screwed up in a few aspects, but in no way I'm blaming myself for what did. He lied to me several times, and he manipulated me to get just what he wanted. He is the most selfish and egocentric person I have ever met. All he thinks is about himself. Now that he is happy with her there is no way in hell that he will apologize for the mean things he said to me. What I heard is that she is a little high school slut, so I guess she is a good fit for him. I know I deserved some of it, but he was never considering towards my feelings. We were still kinda up in the air, and he knew I had feelings for him, and he didn't understand when I tried to explain why I was mad/upset. He pretty much said "this is your problem, not mine, deal with it". This last couple of weeks have been tough, but I will not let him bring me down. I am starting to see that I didn't lose anything, I actually won, because I got rid of an abusive, manipulative boy and now I am free to find a man, who can care for me and be what my ex could never be.
Tags: Love Betrayal
This is almost a two year long story. I have a short 25 minute video that will be attached to this video. I met a girl that I was there for right off the bat when her mom was having more time f***ing this guy than taking care of her daughter. She moved in with in with me, but soon I would learn the truth to her. She was abusive, and didn't do anything. She had very bad hygiene problems that would lead to her yeast infection and multiple UTI's. She watched pedophile porn which made me absolutely sick. The girl walked out on me when I needed her, and we would eventually break up. She would play mind games with me back and forth for a while. Then in the end she finally told me that I was just a comforter, that I never mattered, and to go kill myself. Sadly I'm cursed with this feeling because she was my first everything. The video below will give a better insight.
Well me and this one guy named Connor starterted going out on Janury 16 2013. We hit things off. Everything was great.Then out of the blue he asks another girl out. With me standing right next to him. Well, it didn't last long. On February 4 2013 I broke up with him because I found out he was cheating on me with 4 other girls. He called me that night asking what is going on. I broke up with him officially. He balled for 2 freakin' weeks. But he was my first boyfriend. Any guess what the next day I was walking down the hall and he starts making out with my best friend to make me jealous. When my friend found out I broke up with him( she knew I still had feelings for him) she asks him out. Now he wants to know my crush. And he expects us to be friends. Oh did I mention he beated me.
Tags: can't even
I don't really know why I felt compelled to do this, but i mean why not. basically, me and this guy were together for about 10 months and i've never been more comfortable around a person ever. stupidly, i thought we were "perfect" for each other if there is such a thing but i was happy and i had let my guard down... which was also stupid because i know that only leads to being even more hurt at the end. anyways, everything was great and i'll always appreciate everything he's done for me but he's now lost every single ounce of my respect. I realized he began to change over the summer and there were several red flags that the relationship was going downhill. but of course, i didn't want it to end so i dealt with more bullshit than i ever should have put up with and i realize that now. but oh well, can't change that. come september (i think..) we had both changed. for me, it was due to an excessive amount of stress. school had just started again and my family problems had begun to escalate once again so obviously i wasn't myself but i thought i had him there to fall back on considering that's what i was led to believe. we started getting into arguments more often, sometimes my fault, sometimes his; we were both at fault. but when we spent time together on the weekends, which he always kept pushing for, everything was fine and arguments were almost non existent. so of course, i wasn't thinking about how badly i was about to get dumped. not even a week before he broke up with me, he had asked me to our school dance a month away on a night we had spent outside with a fire and smores, and laughing blablabla. a day or two after that he had asked me to his cousin's birthday party, even further than a month away and i had gladly accepted both offers. this gave me reason to believe that everything was gonna settle out again, i mean who wouldn't think that right? A couple days later, he dumped me & the night before that he told me that he still "loved" me (quotes because i hate that word). As he was breaking up with me, he was crying and gave me three excuses as to why he was doing it including stress sports and family pressure and he couldn't balance me in the equation. he also dropped the "but we're best friends. we can still be best friends" bomb on me at the same time and demanded hugs from me and also said that the past two weeks didn't feel the same to him. sometime during that two week period he had snuck over from about 1 in the morning till 6. honestly, i'm still confused about everything. & it gets worse. he texted me THREE times that night asking how i was and telling me about his family arguments and whatever and i was just like um what.
So this breakup story teens could probly relate to more. So me and this guy got together at the begining of the school year, he is my first boyfriend. He tried to flirt with me and he kept annoying me for about a week because he wanted to go out with me so bad. I had a few feelings for him so we gave it a shot,everything was going smoothly when about two weeks after we started going out he accused me of cheating on him with one of my friends. So I broke up with him to see if maybe he just needs some time so we broke up friday and got together on Monday. We went out for about three months and then he was being mean to my friends, me, and he accused me AGAIN for cheating on him. So we brokeup again and i asked him if he still wanted to be friends and he said "No, i don't think it will work out" and i said" You don't think i have a good reason to breakup with you do you"? and he said " No you don't"and i was about to explode right there in front of thirty people so I just went and sat down. Later on in the day i cheaked my email and i had an email from him and it said " Someone once told me that having someone that you love as a friend and in your life is better then not having them in your life at all". So we were friends for about two weeks and then things took a turn for the worst. He called me a Re Re and a B word and he told me to go puck myself. He was emailing me on the school email so he had to change the f to a p so he wouldn't get in trouble. He was trying to make me jelouse by asking two of my best friends out and that made things ten times worse. He keeps asking if we can get back together but he knows i have nothing new to say to him. So I have not talked to him in three weeks, but he keeps emailing but i have the strangth not to email him back. So if your ex wants you back and you and me have a similar story then he probley dosen't really like you. If they don't respect, appreciate, and value you then they don't deserve you. Stay strong I belive in you. Also if I miss spell something I am sorry. Good luck :)
This all began after I had broken up with my ex ( connor.) I wanted something new and exciting. 2 weeks after, my bestfriend introduced me to a guy by giving me his number. His name was Mathew. Good looking, had his own car, fun
From the moment I met him there was something about him. He would always pick me up, bought me expensive gifts, which was unnecessary but I loved it. The thing with mathew was that, his stories never seemed to add up, and about the silly things. For example, he would tell me that he didnt like this movie, and a month later he would say he really liked it. We would always get in these confrontations because I never knew what was going on in his head. He was an amazing liar. He had many issues, his dad was an alcoholic, he had issues within himself. I wanted to be there with him every step of the way, I gave up so much for this guy. He had never told anyone he loved them before, it was a HUGE thing for him, and finally after seeing a psychologist for that and other problems, after a year we had been dating, he finally told me he loved me. I left for hawaii with my family shortly after, and we would talk on facebook even though I found he was being really distant.
When I came back, I had a feeling something was off. I asked him if he had been going out behind my back, and he took my hand, looked at my straight in my eyes and said " I promised I havent been lying to you about ANYTHING. " But that was lie within itself.
I found out that he had been lying to me, well everyone about his personality, who is he. As i mentionned above how he would lie about liking a movie, even a certain food- only to get me to like him. And it worked! He never ever told me things that he didnt like about me. If i did something to piss him off, he wouldnt tell me and he would go talk shit about me to other people to get his anger out.. I didnt know this. I had broken up with him, and he seemed really sad and guilty, so i offered a break, just for few days to think things over. 4 days later I contact him, and he tells me to get out of his life, he hates me, he was only with me cause he felt bad for me..? im so confused. Apparently he was just tired of pretending to be someone else around me, and having bottled up all his emotions he blew up on me.
What I fell inlove with was just a bunch of lies put together. Right before we went on break, he admitted to me that the psychologist wanted to send him to see a psychiatrist, im guessing to get diagnosed with most likely a personality disorder. Its hard for me to move on from here because I just keep thinking back on what was true and what was a lie.. Ill never know. I seen pictures of him clubbing 2 days ago and it hurt me so much. Im doing my best to move on, I really thought this guy loved me, I shouldve listening to the warning signs from the begining.
Tags: break up
Hey guys :) i've read some of your stories and i guess mine isn't as tragic but it still hurts... It all started the day after a friend's party me and 3 guys were kicked out of the house at about 8 in the morning and we decided we were hungry. So we went to Dunkin'Donuts. There we started talking and i realized how much in common we had with K[my ex]. After that we hadn't paid much attention to eachother but we started chatting on facebook. We got closser and closser with every single day we always chatted and when we weren't near a computer we texted. So on march 28th 2012 we started dating ^^ Everything was perfect we were always together we had mutual friends and everything was perfect... i was so HAPPY :)... i even gave my virginity to him ... But then things got bad... we started seeing eachother less and less... he stopped calling me or whatever... if i didn't write to him or call him he never would... he prefered to go to his pottheaded friends then be with me :). So the first time i hadn't heard from him for a week i told him that i want attention i know he's been on the computer i've seen his facebook posts FOR GODS SAKE! And he just looked with those puppy eyes said he was sorry and everything was right again :)... but no.. it happened again... and again... On the third time i asked him how would he feel in my place? What would he do? Did he know that i felt like i was there just so if someone asked him if he had a girlfriend he'd say yes? He just stayed silent... After that day ended i went home and i was expecting atleast a phonecall from him to bring me back.... Nope! Not even a message... So i wrote: after everything we've been trough i didn't even get one message... he called me. The same thing happened i talked he stayed silent... we said we'd meet... We did the samme thing and after the hundret time of me asking him what should i do and how does he think i feel he said i hope we stay friends.... The sad thing is 4 months after the break up i already have a new boyfriend that does EVERYTHING for me and treats me like a princess and i still can't get HIM out of my mind... and what hurts even more is that he doesn't give crap about me :) So i'm forced to see him everyday at school and act happy and fake...
Hello everyone. My name is Keller Connley, and this is the story of how my first girlfriend broke my heart. It was freshman year, and the homecoming was coming up. I was very desperate and asked a lot of girls to come with me, but they all said no. Finally, I asked this girl who I had only seen a few times during school, and she was in my math class. So, a week before homecoming, I asked her, and she said, "I'll, think about it." The next day, she told me yes I will go with you and gave me her number. Later that night, when we were texting, she told me that she had a boyfriend. I was shocked, since I would have never asked her if I had known. She said to not worry, because she wanted to break up with her anyway. So she did that, and a few days later we were going out. Homecoming was extremely fun and I had a great time with her.
So, during our time together, we did things, like go to the movies and hung out at my dads place. We didn't go all the way, since we were in ninth grade and both Christians. The furthest I went was halfway between 2nd and 3rd base.
We did this for eight months, but I started to realize that there were cracks in the relationship. We stopped spending every second of school outside of class together, and we also didn't text as much as before, since I had broken my phone.
The straw that broke the camels back, however, was in fact my best friend for 3 years. He got jealous, and somehow convinced me she was cheating on me, and convinced me to give him her number. That was on Sunday May 6th 2012. She confronted me the next day, and started asking me weird questions. Apparantly, my friend had told her lies, such as that I watched gay porn, and that I had my eyes on this black girl in school. I dismissed these lies, and life was normal again. However, on May 12th and 13th, when we talked over the phone, she told me that she had feelings for my friend. On May 14th, when school started, she broke up with me, and shattered my heart. I later found out that she had asked out my friend no more than 19 minutes later. My birthday was that Saturday.
For the following 2 weeks, I broke down in tears many times, both in and out of class. She in my opinion is being controlled by him because he has threatened me with violence, and the few times I have been able to speak to my ex, she tells me, " I shouldn't be talking to you. Randy is very jealous, and I don't want him to hurt you."
Now, since it's been almost a year, I am going to try and talk to her again. What do you guys and gals think I should do?
Where to begin? I guess I should start with when we met. It was April 9th, 2012; the day we got back from a trip for marching band. I was talking to my friend Melanie and she said, "you should try to talk to new guys. You never know, something good might come out of it." I said, "who should I talk to though and how?" That's when she suggested I talk to the guy who would eventually be the best boyfriend I've ever had: Brandon. So, when I got home, I message him on Facebook because I had nothing better to do and I thought if I went up to him in person and talked to him that it would be weird. I doubted that he even knew who I was (I was wrong about that. Turns out our friend Nick had told him that he should date me when I was a freshman. I'm now a junior and he was a sophomore at the time. We're in high school). So, we hit it off and everything seemed great. But as months passed I was wondering why he never asked me out. He told me he wanted to get to know me better first. So then the summer went by and we didn't talk much. Then in August 2012, we had band camp and we started talking again. He asked me if I wanted to sit with him on the bus on the way to competitions. I said yes. The bus rides were always fun and he was a really big flirt. Once again, I began to wonder why he wasn't asking me out, but this time I didn't bring it up. Then on November 6th, 2012, we hung out and he asked me out. The way he did it was really corny, but it was cute. I was so happy. Then, 2 weeks later he told me that he didn't want me hugging other guys, because he wanted it to be an exclusive part of our relationship. I thought this was dumb, but I just said okay because I didn't want to start anything. This were going fine and then two weeks later, he told me to switch lockers and move into his (I was previously sharing one with my best friend, Louis). I think he was just jealous or insecure. Maybe both. I was his first girlfriend, so maybe he was just scared he'd lose me or something. So, that weekend he's over my house. We've made out before but we had never used tongue and we tried it but I didn't like it. He got frustrated and said that "it's a way to kiss. How can you not like it?" I said I didn't know. Then over the next two weeks it seemed like everyday he said he was getting frustrated with me. I was getting upset and depressed because I felt like I was letting an not being a good enough girlfriend. So, eventually I decided to break up with him on December 14th, 2012, because I just wasn't happy anymore. I did it over the phone because the only other time I would have been able to do it was at school or at my house and that would have been awkward. So I was on the phone with him and I did it. I broke up with him. He didn't say anything and I started to cry. I felt really bad and him not saying anything made me feel worse. Then five minutes later he said "Can we still be friends?" I said "yes" he said "okay. Bye." And hung up. I kept crying for a good 3 hours. He called me like 2 hours later but I was asleep. He left a voicemail saying that he hopes that I don't think he's mad at me and that he wishes things could have worked out but he's glad we can still be friends. I was happy about that. But as the weeks passed it seemed like he wanted the opposite. Now, he rarely talks to me and I feel like when he does, I annoy him. I miss him so much and it's ridiculous. I want him back, but I know he'll never want me again. I at least want to be friends again. I asked him to my junior prom, so maybe that will help, but we'll have to wait and see. Is there anything else I can do? I think I might be in love with Brandon and knowing that I screwed things up just hurts so much. I want to fix it. Breaking up with him was probably the biggest mistake in my life and I regret it so much.
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