You Broke Up How?

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March 25, 2016 @ (Anywhere)

Tags: #surviving

I was in an emotionally abusive relationship. I never was interested in dating until 9 months ago. I am 20 years old and I am young, but I fell in love. To me he was perfect until one day he wasn't. He told me I wasn't attractive enough for him, that I was stupid, a whore, worthless, etc. None of which is true. My friends were confused what I saw in him, and I will not try to sound conceited, but I knew I was much better looking. He made his own insecurities mine, to hide how he really felt. I was so depressed, I lost almost 15 bs. I was never big. I was 5'6" and went from 122 lbs to 106 lbs in three months. It was unhealthy. The first time we broke up I was devastated. I didn't eat or sleep, my anxiety was so bad it overtook my life. I was so desperate to make things right that I drove him further away. There was a point where I couldn't leave my bed and my roommates were genuinely concerned about me. A month later we got back together. It was beautiful. I was so happy and he said he loved me all the time. However 2 months later, it crashed again. I am OKAY. I am here to tell you it gets better. We broke up two days ago, I cried yesterday, but that's okay. I feel liberated. I realized that yes, we love each other, but we both are too immature to be together at this point. Sometimes when a relationship ends, you need to take a step back and really look at it. He holds grudges, he mentally abused me, he never made sacrifices for me, which made me resent him. I realized that sometimes love isn't enough. Sometimes you realize that no matter how desperate you are to make things work, they just don't. I know it's hard to accept, heck I am struggling too. If it is meant to be it will be. Maybe it's just not the right time, but I can tell you that once you hit rock bottom you can go nowhere else, but up. I was at rock bottom, I lived and someone I am okay. I haven't bombarded him with texts begging him to take me back or whine how it isn't fair. I simply said I wouldn't contact him unless he contacted me and he hasn't. I will not reach out again. My best advice to anyone going through what I survived, as much as it sucks and as much as you want to reach out and be with them, cut them off. Take a real look at your relationship. Do you want to go back to it? Is it worth it? If it is, than fight for it and if it works, that's amazing, if it doesn't at least you'll know you gave everything you had. I can promise you it isn't easy, but it does get better.

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John

October 05, 2010 @ (Boston)

Tags: 10 years of my life wasted

I meet this girl freshmen year of high school and started dating very soon after that . We dated all through High School and We even went to college near each other so we could continue dating .I consider this girl the love of my life since i have been with her since i was 15 and the only woman i have been with . Madly in love with each other through high school and most of college we had plans to get married got engaged as i proposed to her the night of my 22nd birthday . I though i had found everything I could ever imagine in a girl she was perfect . Towards the end of our senior year of college i felt her distant and slipping away , after graduation i took an internship away from Boston and i was going to be away for 3 months . I felt that i was loosing her even tho she denied it and i asked a very good friend of mine (one of my 2 closest friends , the only 2 people present besides us the night we got engaged) to keep an eye on her and take care of her when i was gone . 2 months later i get an email from her saying that she had thought about us while i was away and that it was best for us to go our separate ways , when i returned to Boston i tried to make things work beacuse i couldnt lose her after 8 years ( at 22 a lifetime) . I found out her new "boyfriend" while i was away was the very same friend i asked to watch out for her . I snapped and assaulted her knew boyfriend . I was charged with severe assault and battery and had to do 3 months in jail .
I am now 25 10 years after i meet the woman who ruined my life i am still very in love with her

Maya

July 16, 2022 @ (Netherlands)

Tags: Breakup

When I was 16 I was curious about having a relationship with a boy. Any if possible, although I had some in mind for a while.

He was the friend of my brother, but also a friend in a group at school I was part of. He was nice, treated me like I was normal. I had very low self esteem. No other boy treated me like him.
I chatted a lot with him on MSN. At one point he broke up with his girlfriend and I was kind of eager to match him with someone. I started to like him and wishing I was his girlfriend. He made me feel tingly.
At one point I convinced him to kiss me. And he was very good at it.
We were not a couple at that point. He kept me on a distance, not sure what to do. Mostly because of my brother. The summer was hot and we were getting more involved. We shared many kisses and it was amazing. But still he would not want to be my boyfriend.
I was getting down, but I waited for him.
It was September when he finaly dared to make it official. My brother was kind of let down, but wanted us to be happy so he went along with it.

My relationship was in a nutshell a life changing experience, but not good for me. We had lots of sex, what kept us addicted to eachother. But he was not my match. He wanted to go out a lot, see sports and friends, while I wanted to stay at home, watch movies and such. And there was his toxic mother. In the beginning she was enthusiastic, but later on she didn't saw me as a good daughter in law. She was convinced I was not good for her son. In the end, she was right, but the way she treated me was not right. I felt worse about myself than ever before. But I loved him, so I holded on. Even when we were on a break for a month, I still went back to him. The last year of our relationship was the most miserable one. He made me feel like I was not good enough for him, because I was not myself. He was also right. I wasn't. I left all my hobbies behind and did things I didn't like. Even though he ment I was not his ideal girlfriend, I know now I couldn't match his expectations.
In the end he went out with a girl to a cinema. And that was his trigger to end it.
I was heartbroken and begged him to come back.
But he said he would not.
We met one last time and after that I never spoke to him again.

Now I can say I am grateful he ended it, but healing from this relationship took a long time for me. At first I thought about him daily, at almost every moment, and slowly that became less and less.

I met my husband 3 years later. Right after my lowest point ever. He is my match. Not sure soulmate, but I can't think of anyone more right for me. He is kind, caring, make me laugh and is my best friend. I can share anything with him. But most important: stay myself. I spent time on my hobbies and interests and he not only admires it, but stimulates me. I love him so much and I am grateful to have this other life.

From time to time I sometimes think about my ex. Wondering what my life would have looked like if we didn't broke up. Or what kind of children we would have had. I have a son now, so that is on my mind a lot. Doesn't mean I want to be his, but I just wonder. It doesn't hurt me anymore and I never want to go back.

Damon Cooper

March 03, 2016 @ (Baku, Azerbaijan)

Tags: Bad breakup, still loved back then

We had 2 months long relationship. Despite living in a homophobic country, we had great time. We used to sing a list of songs when we met, stare at each other for a long time. We both made mistakes, he did more. He started to be more rude day-by-day. I knew that his attraction towards me was decreasing. He made mistakes, i forgave him. Sometimes, because of his age, sometimes, because he had some problems. But, finally, i wanted to finish. I finished, though i still loved him. I think, in the end of the day, the most valuable person for your is YOU guys. You set your value in the society. If you love yourself, others definitely will. So, i had to decide so.

Felix

October 06, 2012 @ (calexico)

Tags: love hurts

This guy sat next to me for the whole school year.... We started talking 1 month the school year ended.. he had a girlfried and 6 months before i experianced my first brake up of a year and 4 months i had come a long way and when we started talking i started to have a little crush ge graduated from highschool anf on the summer going to my senior year he dumped his girlfriend and dated me... He broke up with me for no reason.... Then one day he came to my house hold my hand and we had sex then he told me he dident wanted a gf.. a cried alot i felt used then he ask for a second chance and i gaved it to him we were fine but this girl came along.. he made a new friendv in college that girl is 3 years older than him and she has a baby they would send msg back and forth every day and when i confront him he said she was just a friend... One day his facebook was logged on and i read msgs he has with her ... Where he said i was a drama with an attitude.. that he was a pro at sex since a young age.... That the neighbores knew his name because they would hear me screme when we were having sex... The girl said her homework was hard and that he should go to her house abd help her.. she gaved him her adress and he ask for her number.. that where the msgs end i they kept texting trough phone messages... I cried alot i felt used embarrased he insulted me i broke up with him.... He wanted to meet up and talk about it he said he never cheated but i never gave him a chance to explain himself because those msg were his own words and nothing he would of said could changed the facts in 17 homefully i find my soul mate and hot guys that play with my heart

George

January 11, 2010 @ (Dallas,Texas)

Tags: texas, hearbreak, breaking up, breakups

Nothing like starting the new year by seeing a picture on facebook of your girlfriend making out with some dbag at a party. Best part is i haven't talk to her in about 2 days. When, and if she calls im going to break up with her on the spot. Get this, her friend has been hitting on my for the past month. I'm thinking i might actually make out with her and post it on facebook. That would be a fun breakup story. Karma doesn't exist.

Jolene

January 02, 2012 @ (Aus)

Tags: 1

We weren't together long, probably only over a month and the relationship felt kind of rushed, as if everything just went way too fast. It isn't as if I regret anything about the relationship as it happened, I just think it would've turned out better if it didn't go so fast.
Anyway, all of a sudden when the holidays began we saw each other less and less. I was told that he was working too much and he was too tired to see me. When I asked about our lack of communication he said that he was just too tired and that I never really talked to him. It was frustrating and despairingly I attempted a sort of silent approach interspersed with periods of strained conversation (not face to face). I have no idea how any of this was supposed to help and so I just left it. He didn't 'have time' to see me...okay, then I'll just go on and assume that he's just not interested anymore.
So basically my breakup was a prolonged period of confusion in which the dumper let me work it out for myself that we were no longer together. Whether this method of indirect break up was an act of cowardice, laziness or (seriously misguided) kindness I don't know. We still talk occasionally through social networks and such and are supposedly 'friends' in a weird way that feels like nothing meaningful. I don't feel any resentment towards him (or try not to) because this stuff happens and people lose interest. Except I hope that when it does happen most people explain this to the persons' face and don't let them painstakingly figure it out for themselves.

Keller Connley

March 17, 2013 @ (Milford, Ohio)

Tags: First Girlfriend, Betrayel

Hello everyone. My name is Keller Connley, and this is the story of how my first girlfriend broke my heart. It was freshman year, and the homecoming was coming up. I was very desperate and asked a lot of girls to come with me, but they all said no. Finally, I asked this girl who I had only seen a few times during school, and she was in my math class. So, a week before homecoming, I asked her, and she said, "I'll, think about it." The next day, she told me yes I will go with you and gave me her number. Later that night, when we were texting, she told me that she had a boyfriend. I was shocked, since I would have never asked her if I had known. She said to not worry, because she wanted to break up with her anyway. So she did that, and a few days later we were going out. Homecoming was extremely fun and I had a great time with her.

So, during our time together, we did things, like go to the movies and hung out at my dads place. We didn't go all the way, since we were in ninth grade and both Christians. The furthest I went was halfway between 2nd and 3rd base.

We did this for eight months, but I started to realize that there were cracks in the relationship. We stopped spending every second of school outside of class together, and we also didn't text as much as before, since I had broken my phone.

The straw that broke the camels back, however, was in fact my best friend for 3 years. He got jealous, and somehow convinced me she was cheating on me, and convinced me to give him her number. That was on Sunday May 6th 2012. She confronted me the next day, and started asking me weird questions. Apparantly, my friend had told her lies, such as that I watched gay porn, and that I had my eyes on this black girl in school. I dismissed these lies, and life was normal again. However, on May 12th and 13th, when we talked over the phone, she told me that she had feelings for my friend. On May 14th, when school started, she broke up with me, and shattered my heart. I later found out that she had asked out my friend no more than 19 minutes later. My birthday was that Saturday.

For the following 2 weeks, I broke down in tears many times, both in and out of class. She in my opinion is being controlled by him because he has threatened me with violence, and the few times I have been able to speak to my ex, she tells me, " I shouldn't be talking to you. Randy is very jealous, and I don't want him to hurt you."

Now, since it's been almost a year, I am going to try and talk to her again. What do you guys and gals think I should do?

Beckie

March 02, 2014 @ (England)

Tags: Bad Breakup, Pregnancy,

When I was 20, and not long after I had gotten out of another relationship I started seeing a guy who I was incredibly attracted too (and i think that may have been one of the only reasons I was with him) He was tall, dark hair, blue eyes and very muscular. I'll call him Dave for this story. So Dave and I started dating and we weren't together long before sleeping together. We were all over each other, but one day I discovered that he was putting a condom on then taking it off without me noticing before we had sex. Needless to say I got pregnant. At first I was completely smitten by him and I was convinced along with all my friends and family that he would stand by me. But before I discovered I was pregnant things started getting a little weird. I noticed he tried to dominate me, just with things like asking me to get the light or make a cup of tea but he demeaned me greatly if I didn't do it. He also kept giving me back-handed compliments like 'I don't like piercings but you SOMEHOW manage to stay pretty even with them' He didn't like me taking my bra off during sex because my breasts were a turn off but he liked having my top off because he still thought I was mostly sexy, didn't like hanging out with me friends, or stop over at my place, would always choose what was on tv even if I didn't like it, (which was usually the case) and the same with music. It was a disaster but just seeing him got me flustered so I put up with it. He told me he didn't want the baby but he'd stick by me if I chose to keep it which I did. Much to my surprise (but looking back it should have been obvious) he dumped me, refused to have anything to do with the kid, tried again 4 weeks after breaking up to get me to get rid of the baby, blamed the whole thing on me and said I just did it for attention so he shouldn't have to be a dad. After my son was born I tried to get child support off him but he claimed he wasn't the dad and refused a DNA test. I would love to get him back one day but I started dating my current boyfriend when I was 7 months pregnant who I had known before hand. He quit a job he loved to get a better paid one, borrowed money off his family to get a nice, decent house for all three of us to live in and asked me not to take money of Dave because as far as he's aware my son is his and he will support him not some jackass that's not man enough to take responsibility. We are now looking into my boyfriend adopting our son, and as a Christmas present I changed our son's second name to his. He cried he was so happy. I was 20, at uni, my family lived in a different country and I was living on my mates couch at the time I got pregnant...just goes to show you that when life is hard there are still some good people you can depends on.

Brianna

March 27, 2012 @ (Belcamp)

Tags: Text, First Date, Week

So, there was this guy that I didn't know, he emailed me asking if we could go out. I said sure, and we started texting. He was suspended from school because he had threatened a guy, and was out for that whole week. Then he comes back, and we have lunch together. That day, during the bus ride, he broke up with me. Before our first date which was scheduled for that weekend.