Searching for "pen"

417 Results For 'pen'

Adox

October 26, 2014 @ (Oxfordshire)

Hi

I've been with my gf for 2 years 2 months and it was love at first sight. We met online and realised we lived in the same town about 400 yards from each other.

We went clubbing as she Is quite the party girl, likes to drink and forget her worries and that's one of a million reasons why I love her so much.

The first year of our relationship was the typical fairy tale, we told each other how much we love each other and want to be this way forever. It was a dream that everyone wanted.

The second year however has been tough. In November last year, we found out we was expecting our little baby together which was fantastic news but it wasn't an easy pregnancy (both have kids from previous relationships) she was constantly in pain, being sick and found it hard to be a normal mother. Then she lost one of her horses that she adored so much, I supported her as much as I could but she put on a brave face and marched on. Finally her dad fell ill with cancer, he lives in the highlands of Scotland so she doesn't see him often but that's what's upsetting her most I think. But to top it all off, now she isn't pregnant, she wants to party again and have her me time, which I understand but our time has vanished. I get extremely jealous when she does go out because that's the only time I see her smile :( when she gets in, usually early hours of the morning, I interrogate her asking her about whether other men have been around her. I'm my own worst enemy because I imagine situations that never happened and believe what never exists.

I had the courage last night to ask her if this relationship is worth saving, she replied I do not know. I asked if she loves me and again the answer was I do not know. I broke there and then, I didn't know how to be anymore. So I asked where do we go from here and she asked me for a break where I move out, restrict contact so she can have space and time to think about what she wants.

Today is the day Iove out and I won't see her or maybe here from her till her head has been cleared and she can concentrate on exactly what she wants.

I'm lost without her, I can't sleep, I can't eat, I feel sick all the time, I'm shaking all the time for I do not know if the outcome is going to be what I hope for but time is needed to pass and as I cry typing this, I fear the answer is there, written on her face but is going to take time for the answer.

I must do what it takes to stop being a jealous man if I'm ever going to prove what I'm worth and in time I hope she sees me as she did before

Ksofia

September 23, 2014 @ (Tampa )

Tags: Bad break upj

Well I met this boy in high school a year and a half ago, he wasn't even the tipe of guys I would go for, we were complete opposites, but we became good friends for about two months and started dating. We hit it of so well it was one of my most amazing loves. Through out our relationship there was this girl that would always want contact him and I never trusted her, me and him would have disputes everytime she messaged him it never stopped. When I told him to block her on facebook she had a tumbler with a nudes picture of her self and she massaged him through there as well, when I found that I told him to delete it. I thought finally she would stop. Anyways one day he comes home and just breaks up with me no reason or explanations I was shocked so heartbroken. And I couldnt help but think it was because of her.. The next day I texted him and Told him I would pick him up from work to talk, we did and he treated me like he'd never shared a life with me. A complete jerk! All he kept saying was "I need time" and he claimed to still love me. He even said that after time passes he would make up his mind about us, giving me false hope. All for what? I couldn't take it anymore, decided to hack all his social medias and it turns out had been talking to this girl months before. This girl is honestly the lowest of the lowest, and he completely disgust me. I thought so high of him, believing his every promise and it turn out he's was just a liar. And would drop me all for some girl that told him showed him and promises to do all sorts of nasty things to him. i wish he would have broken up with me before starting all these things with this girl. Thats what hurt the most. All this happened behind my back. I'm glad I get to move on and not have to worry about him because honestly he's not even the list not worth it anymore.

Enamiran

September 05, 2014 @ (algeria)

Tags: sad

i met him 4years ago ,i was playing second life n i wanted to hear music,i dnt really remmeber wat i typed in google searching for music but the download ended up with a window of strangers talking to me,it is imesh,many ppl from all around th word,i added many frens,from every country a fren,n i added him as well,i didnt imagine that i would b with him but we started talking and we really enjyed talking to eatchother,like to th point when i go back from uni th first thing i do is open my pc n chat with him,n i find him always waiting,2months mater we told each other we like eatchother n that time we just seen eatchother in pic ,he was far away from me,we both liked th idea of having a foreign love,we loved eatch other,my familly knew they convince me to step away,n i steped away alitle,i made my self bz,coz it sounded impossible to meet n have a futur toguether,at first i used to fight with him alot,it was fun no hurts,but just arguing with him was fun,he was so calm understanding kind innocent n sinceer(in my toughts) n after every fight he used to tell me how much he loves me n he cant live without me,he always appologyzed even sometimes for meaningless things,i guess i had a kid mind that time :/, anyway, 2years past n we still in love we use evry possible way to contact fb yahoo skype watssapp,later in a day i was too bz with studdy,to th point i guess my feeling were colden,i was talking to him in video n i told him"i think i dnt love u"!! (stupid me) he cried in that moment,i said im sorry,it's ok myb it's just im bz n my mind is not clair,we can try over toguether i can get back my feelings,6months later,a girl talked to him she said she liked him n he talked to her,she was from his country but not very pretty,he hided that on me for a month ,then he tod me i hide it bcoz i know u ll b mad!,i said ok no problem,i enter his fb ,but he changed his password (he gave it to me b4) i ask him when we skype he liyed on th date of changing th fb password to let me think it was b4 he met th other girl,i knew he was lying by th fb notice" u have changed ur fb passeword on...." i got angry n i cut th call i his face,after that he run to her love ,he shut me off for 3days,colden his feelings,n he talked to her instead,i got afraid to lose him n to lose my self in my exams period so i ask him to try again another chance,we back,but since then he act cold with me whenevr we fight,he understood that he could not lose me ( i my self dnt know if he will lose me one day ) n since then he is th 1 who colden his feelings in our breakups n im th one who get depressed n feel like "omg ,he forgot my love,im meaninglesto him"i dnt wat exactly to do to know my value to him,breakup doent give a clue anymore(knowning that th longest breakup we had was for a weak!!)

Lovell

September 05, 2014 @ (California )

Tags: Sad breakup

It was my Junior year of high school and his sophomore year, we met through an activity that we loved greatly. At first I didn't really notice him until one day he came up to me and randomly asked for my number..it was the first time that ever happened to me. He was cute but I didn't think anything of it since I was caught up with another boy who was a complete asshole in the end (dummy). So we became good friends, but eventually he'd fall in love with me but I wasn't sure if I wanted a boyfriend. Well senior year started and we went on a trip, we ended up holding hands randomly, I started to realize that he was someone I wanted to be with and I was ready to invest myself into someone. That night we shared an amazing kiss under the stars and our friends actually clapped with joy. We were together for 7 months, never argued, we were happy, so happy that I actually believed he was the one. He was my best friend, my happiness. Well once I graduated he started putting space between us, I began to be very depressed. After a few weeks he didn't think it would work. I told him we could make it work but he chose the easy way out and let me go. It pains me that he didn't want to go into this new chapter in my life with me because he promised he'd never leave. I'm still grieving after 3 long months, hopefully I can be happy again but only time heals wounds.

Not RealName

September 05, 2014 @ (Ohio)

Tags: stalking bad breakup

I dated a guy a year younger than me in high school. The relationship went really well for 5 months. We were in marching band together and were very different people. I was in color guard and he was a clarinet. I was really bubbly and extroverted while he was quiet and sweet. We meshed well with our differences. But he was always too reserved. He never told me what he was thinking, would be quiet often just following me, so I felt emotionally unfulfilled and lonely in the relationship. He also never made any of the first moves. We went to Disney World with our band and we were watching the fireworks over the Disney castle, Tinker Bell flying through the air, the perfect romantic setting. But he never kissed me...and that was one first move I could never make. I wanted to feel wanted.
So I began distancing myself from him. He noticed and started being clingier. He followed me everywhere in school. He would even stand behind me while I ate lunch with friends. It was creepy. Eventually I was on crutches and I felt like a wounded animal while he was stalking his prey. He chased me into the girl's bathroom on crutches with friends trying to protect me. He wasn't violent, just desperate. Then one day that changed.
He was waiting for me to come in and watched me go to my locker. I moved slowly in fear and tried to phone friends to come help me but none of them responded fast enough. So I limped to class and he bolted after me. He kept saying things like "Why won't you talk to me? Just listen to me." I didn't say anything. Then he got so mad he pushed me and I fell into a very rough brick wall. I got scratched by the bricks and it hurt. I screamed for him to go away and he ran off with everyone looking. I got him suspended. But he tried to stalk me for years after that. We never even kissed...
Anyways plot twist: We're getting married now.

Natasha

August 08, 2014 @ (New Jersey)

Tags: bad breakup, betrayal

Ok, so here it goes. We met in college at 19 years old, he pursued me. We went out on a date and boom from there we saw each other multiple times, got into a relationship and fell in love. He was my first love and he broke my heart. We were together about 4 and 1/2 years, he lived with me in my mom's house and we didn't charge him any rent or anything always made sure he had food, clothes whatever he needed, I took care of him pretty much. He was a great guy, always treated me well but very unmotivated which caused me to be very bitchy towards him because I just wanted him to make something of himself and do something with his life. When you are with someone almost 5 years you want your relationship to move forward and progress and I just felt like we were stuck. Besides the point I made many mistakes in the relationship too but what happened in the end is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. We started to drift and I noticed so he went away for the weekend as did I separately to think things over and I wanted to work on it because I was still in love with him and he didn't have any desire to work on it so just like that it was over. Now here comes the good part. I confided in one of my close friends about the breakup and told her I was still in love with my ex only to find out her and him started dating 2 weeks later after him and I broke up and apparently they are in love now and in a relationship. Mind you I know this girl since I was 12 years old. My heart is shattered into pieces, it is honestly a horrible feeling when someone betrays you like this especially when you spend so much time with a person and they say they will never hurt you but they do. The biggest lesson I have learned from this is to never put to much trust in anyone. Honestly this situation has made me doubt ever wanting to fall in love again because the heartbreak just hurts to much.

Pauly

August 03, 2014 @ (Neverland)

Tags: shit happens, life goes on, confused,

I met him in high school. It was a whirlwind kind of love. Innocent, reckless, gentle, and daring. I did not realize it then, but I realized now how much I loved the way he smiles and the way he laughs. The way his messy hair falls on his eyes, and I brush it off. The way he takes my hand and pulls me into his warm embrace. But then, it was not always like that. He'd be so suspicious, so distrustful. He doesn't believe that I can just be friends with a guy. Even with a five year record, he can't bring himself to believe that I am just as head over heels for him. Funny how he almost broke up with me for another bitch.
All of a sudden he breaks up with me saying shit like he's ashamed because I'm way out of his league. Shit like he can't keep his hands off me. Shit like he's thinking what's better for me and that's a future without him. Well shit. It wasn't the first time, but it felt painfully like the last break up we will ever have. He comes crawling back and I happily accept him. He lies straight to my face, and I broke up with him. But Im having doubts.

Janessa

July 28, 2014 @ (Melbourne)

Tags: confused

We've been dating since last July, and he's as sweet as can be.. at first. But eventually a man shows his true colors and stops doing everything he did to get you. Regardless, our relationship pretty much was just about sex to him. Which is probly why im 5 months pregnant. You would think that someone who's about to be a father would grow up and mature some to prepare himself.. nope. Hes 22 still lives with his parents and doesn't even have a license. What a joke. Well yesterday was our baby shower, and he acted soo stupid the whole time. He wasnt even with me the whole day. He wouldn't even take a picture with me cause his brother was there; and we were still together. Afterwards he left with his brother and came back home at 10 pm. He didnt even open gifts with me, just went straight to sleep. Well that caused a huge argument and now he talks about me blaming him for everything so he left and said he was walking home, all the way to palm bay.. I told Jim to jusy break up with me if hea not happy. Some how I think he only stays for the baby's sake, and I dont want that.

Ricky

July 08, 2014 @ (Granger, Indiana)

Tags: Blindsided Breakup

I had met her about two years ago at school. She was new in town since she just moved from Colorado. After about a year later I started getting invited to her parties and to her house to watch a movie or something. For the sake of privacy her name will be Rosie. We had only begun to be serious about Fall of 2013. I had committed to seeing her father monthly to talk with him about her. There was one problem. Rosie's family was a strong Christian family while I always had trouble with faith so I retained an Atheist standpoint. However, I was accepted by her family as long as I tried to adapt a Christian lifestyle. I blindly accepted the task and was given permission to date her. Now, I had issues at the time. I hadn't been able to see a purpose in life and constantly thought about suicide. Once I told her she helped me through it and those thoughts left me alone. We would sit on the school balconies holding hands as she talked me through it. We officially started dating on January 20th, 2014. Everything seemed fine with us. And I like to think that it was. Those times were the best in my life. I was convinced that even though it doesn't happen, she would be my first and my last. Oh how I was wrong. We had our first argument about a week ago so around July 1st or 2nd. I was in Europe at the time so I couldn't talk with her face to face. The issue was that I was a constant pessimist. That she couldn't be happy when she was with me. I didn't understand since I always had a negative view on events. I told her that once I get back that we would meet and make amends. So we did. Yesterday. July 7th, 2014. She came over to my house and we had a great time. At the end of the day we talked about what was wrong. I asked if I could have time to work on it and I was granted it. Then her phone buzzed letting know her parents were on their way. She sighed and looked at me. Right then she dropped the bomb. "I think we should break up". I couldn't move anymore. The day had been great, I had been as positive as I could be. I was calm. I asked why. "I can't be happy with you and I can't be with someone who has different views as I do". I was shocked. Then the pleading began. Everything I said was shut down. Then her third and final reason arose, "I feel like I'm replaceable in your life". After all we had gone through it was unbelievable. Then I knew that this was her parents doing. Before I could say anything more she was out the door. I ran to the other room where I had a gift from Europe for her, I wanted her to take it. So I wouldn't have to hold on to it, but once I made it out of the door she wasn't there. Dumbfounded, I sat on the front porch and cried. Like I never had before. She left me with the lingering questions of why I didn't get a second chance and what went wrong today. Since I haven't been able to sleep tonight, I read up on the worst kinds of break ups. I found my own at number one, the blindsided break up. She had been convinced since we argued that I wasn't the one and I was led to believe everything was alright before I was shot with some of the worst words you'll ever hear. That same day...she held my hand, hugged me, and said that she loved me.

Michael

July 03, 2014 @ (New York City)

Tags: #BadBreakup, #ToxicRelationship, #BipolarDisorder, #Crazypeople

I met my ex-girlfriend on an online dating website and things got serious pretty quickly. She had bipolar disorder but was not getting treated. She lived with her parents and had a rocky relationship with her domineering and controlling mother. I always got the impression that her parents viewed my ex-girlfriend as a disappointment in comparison to her two older sisters who were both married with their own families. It seemed like her parents were happy with just about anybody who take my ex-girlfriend off her hands.

Initially I got along with her parents. I attended family gatherings, holidays and even went on a vacation with them. Over time, however, things changed. It started during a dinner we had with her parents. Her mother had a habit of scolding my ex-girlfriend about seemingly petty things. Even though it was an awkward situation that was uncomfortable, her mother was very unapologetic and instead got upset at me for not talking.

After two years together, we started to run into some problems. My ex-girlfriend was pressuring me into getting engaged, mainly so she could get my health insurance and get treated for her bipolar disorder. She even talked about eloping first so she didnâ€™t have to wait to claim my insurance. I started to feel that the relationship was a little one-sided. We practically spent all of our free time together and I was bothered she never showed much interest in any of my hobbies and was always very vocal about how stupid they were. Another problem were her mood swings which often lead to arguments, which occasionally took place in public places.

After we broke up, I went out on my own while my ex-girlfriend immediately jumped into another relationship. Also during that time, her parents sort of relented and allowed her to get treated for her bipolar disorder. After a few months, we both realized that we still had feelings for each other and decided to get back together, promising that things would be different.

At first not everyone was excited that we were back together, mainly her parents. They were upset because they believed her new boyfriend wouldâ€™ve eventually married her and because they believed I had caused my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings. My ex-girlfriendâ€™s mother was upset at me over an incident that happened a year ago that never occurred. Even though my ex-girlfriend believed her, I was suspicious of her mother.

Initially everything seemed to be going great. The relationship was a lot more balanced and because my ex-girlfriend was taking medication she wasnâ€™t getting those mood swings that plagued us last time. Around the holidays, things started to turn. I was driving my ex-girlfriend to the airport and my car got a flat tire. As I pulled into the gas station, she started screaming at me, like she did before she was taking her medication. It was so bad that the attendants felt sorry for me and gave me the replacement tire for free. Even though my ex-girlfriend wrote off the incident as holiday-related stress, it was the first indication that something wasnâ€™t right.

Over the next month, my ex-girlfriend continued to act erratically and decided to break up with me on Valentineâ€™s Day, only to change her mind the following day and the same pattern would occur every few weeks. Also during that time, my ex-girlfriend discovered that her mother had tricked her into not taking her bipolar medication and had told her doctor that she no longer needed them causing her doctor to believe she was misdiagnosed.

Eventually, my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mother began to act even more coldly towards me. During an argument over the phone, I overheard her mother screaming in background and demanded that she break up with me and get it over with. Every time I saw her mother, I tried to be friendly or polite to her but she either scowl at me or storm out of the room. She continued to badmouth me and even made bizarre accusations about me. She claimed that I wasnâ€™t serious about getting married and claimed that I was gay. She even told family members that she didnâ€™t think that I was a nice person.

By the spring, my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings started to get worse. One night, my ex-girlfriend had too much to drink and she started grinding against me at a restaurant. After I quietly pushed her off of me and told her to stop, she started screaming at me and eventually pushed me out the door. When I returned, she continued to scream at me and had to be told to leave by the manager.

On the way home, I told her we were finished but she wanted to talk. She asked for another chance and promised to stop drinking. When I wouldnâ€™t reconsider, she got upset demanded that I get out of her car and kicked me in my ribs and threw a half empty wine bottle out the window. The following day, she changed her mind and tried to convince me to give her another chance. After she got her friends to contact me, I felt like I had no choice but to give in.

In the following weeks. My ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings got worse and she even got pushy and demanding. When I tried breaking up with her again, she again forced me to reconsider and sometimes held me hostage in her house until I reconsidered. Personally I felt trapped. When my ex-girlfriend and I got back together, this was not what I had envisioned. Now I felt depressed and noticed that I had gained weight.

I decided that I needed an outlet for my feelings and decided to sign up for an obstacle course race. My ex-girlfriend immediately thought it was a dumb idea and was upset that I ask her permission. She also hated that I joined a Sunday softball league with a friend, even though she worked on that day. She always expected me to stay home and meet with her after she got off of work.

The night before the race, my ex-girlfriend decided to rehash an old argument about how she felt that I wasnâ€™t committed to her and believed her mother was about me. The argument continued as I was driving her home and when I tried to break up with her again, she lost her temper and started hitting me over the head with a book as I was driving. Afterwards, I was forced to change my mind after she refused to leave my car. The following week, I finally broke up with my ex-girlfriend after I cancelled my plans with her and she furiously berated me on the phone. Unlike last summer, this was for good.

In the months that followed, my ex-girlfriend continued to try to contact me.
Sometimes she scolded me for breaking up with her and occasionally she begged for another chance. She even would scream at remaining mutual friends when they wouldnâ€™t tell her any information they had on me. I also learned that she was in a serious car accident that some of her friends believe might been a suicide attempt. Eventually, she stopped trying to contact me and I learned that she had started dating another guy and was once again taking bipolar medication.

As for me, I rediscovered how to have fun again. I made a lot of new friends on the softball team I joined that summer. It helped that we won the championship and I ended up making the game winning catch. I also lost 50 pounds and have since competed in 3 more obstacle course races. I even started dating again and am currently in the early stages of a new relationship. Itâ€™s been fun and I can't remember the last time I felt this happy or excited about my life.