Tags: cold breakup
I'm a member of a singles group, a dating agency, basically, and while this was not the most hurtful breakup, it was a pretty cold one. After a month of really great dates and lots of encouragement (from her) for more of the same, the day before a dinner/dance event she slammed me with the revelation of another guy. I absolutely didn't see this coming. Not that we were exclusive, but every bit of feedback I was getting suggested she was focused only on us.
So she called me and in a very business-like way, proceeded to explain that, “The program is set up so you can date other people…” There were no kind softeners. No, “I really like you, but…”; no, “I’ve had a great time with you, but…”; nothing, nada, zip. Just, here are the rules and I followed them.
Then, twice she said, “I wanted to call you myself and let you know, so you didn’t hear it from someone at the group.” Excuse me? What half-mature adult wouldn't call personally to break off a relationship? Newsflash: there's nothing righteous about doing something that's simply responsible. The entire breakup felt like the severing of a business relationship, which makes sense, because she's a corporate officer.
Finally, I wrote her a follow-up e-mail, in which I thanked her for letting me know about this personally (dummy!), and wished her love and happiness. She never replied. Wouldn’t one at least respond in kind, if only briefly? Example: “Dear (you), I wish you love and happiness, too.”
Oh well. The Zen master teaches to disapprove of the action, but not of the actor. Perhaps, but if she becomes available again, I don't have to date her.
Tags: wild out
when i started to date this guy , it was nothing but passion and arguments. four months later he started to talk with someone else . i found out by going through his cell , i never had a reason to go threw this cell. when i had confront him, he felt bad so he started step up. it was great but then i was putting in way more then he was. 6 months later he suddenly didn't want to be in a relationship (idea from his friend} he was there for me still but we still had feelings for each other. he told people we were friends but we were more. after his mom bday last week .(we was official) we started to get more into arguments. i wanted to start dating other people , so we went out saturday everything was right but a bit off . we went to the bar then after the bar he took my laptop n said i dont trust u n push me. we started to get in a argument . his drug dealer brother is missing some stuff , so his brother n him started to blame me . (potheads) i was shock cause i wouldnt dare do that crap but his brother bring strangers into his home. i was even upset when i told him f off im done . he started to call me names . two hours later he went on my fb page n deleted all my photos n friends(he ran off with my laptop) so today i change all my passwords. (im happy to not be with him) he started to text me things n started to name what he dont like about me. like that suppose to hurt
this is long SO, im 21 and a girl ive been with for 18months, shes 18. but ive known her for about over 3 years now we met online and immediately connected and liked her i couldnt stop thinking about her even when she stopped talking for a year and got a bf i also had gotten a gf but after all that somehow perfect timing got us to start talking again when we were both recently single and after a few months i fell even harder and we decided to be in a relationship.
anyway she recently came up to stay for new years eve cause she knew itd mean alot to me, a couple days before new years she decided that Me asking her why she wasnt saying much and just moping around was a good reason for her to decide to leave and rip up some heartfelt things i gave her infront of me and say were over as soon as she gets back home etc. but during the days between then and when she actually left 1day before new years, she said she loved me and held, kissed me we had sex etc. but when she got back she blockd all communications with me so about a week after unanswered txts i added her best friend of 7 years to suss something out cause they havent been friends since a few month ago, i immediately found out that its because My ex was talking to and seeing a guy her ''friend'' was hooking up with behind her back, which was also behind my back. and they are already in a relationship and all that shit so she had been lying to me and cheating for a good few weeks i'd say. we promised eachother from the start even though she lived in another state it wouldnt just be another fuck around and the feelings were real and i would just move there anyway we only saw eachother a few times in person but i was still happy loving her and was serious even if it was hard sometimes i just thought that it'd make it all the more better when we were finally together all the time and i was nearly about to make that happen before she did this. she tried blaming her friend for pushing those 2 closer together becoz her friend pissed him off when she was screwing with his head but thats no excuse to go and start fucking him and dating him she should have stopped talking to him when her friend did. people will tell me too bad and that it was the distance thats a problem but i dont think that makes a difference after 18months ive been really hurt before but this managed to top everything else cause im just so sure about this girl and couldnt have feelings for someone else if i tried i cant move on, if you knew half of the things shes said and promised to me and made me youd be just as shocked as i am for what shes done. i dont know how someone can just erase that amount of time with someone they said theyd be with no matter what just like that asif i was nothing and i had never and would never cheat on her. i have to cry myself to sleep and im sick of it and im stupid enough to hope she'll come back like she did before because i have theories that the guy only did it becoz he wanted to piss her friend off for fucking around with him but if they bould BOTH do that to me n her friend then they must be perfect for eachother in a screwed up way and im guessing it will fuck up soon and she'll be alone and regret it because i know he can't love her atleast not like I do if i'm still dumb enough to want her even after what she's done cause i feel empty im used to having txts and msgs etc. from her every morning day & night and it just kills me to have those images of them in my head i can never get over it so all i'm gonna do is wait until she stops ignoring me.
Tags: crazy, controlling, delusional
Years ago, my best friend began dating a girl that he worked with. It started off okay, but after about a month she told him a sob story and he let her move in with him. That started four years of psychological torture. He found a better job, got a house for her, expensive furniture and electronics for her. She dictated his life - he would have to lie and sneak around to have lunch with me, a best friend from school days, like it was something naughty. She was constantly telling him how much she hated him and how worthless she thought he was. She began attempting to stab him - the first time was because he brought her breakfast in bed and forgot the orange juice. She would never let him be in a room by himself, then complain that he never let her have the life she wanted. She told him to propose, but he could never bring himself to buy the $10,000 ring she had to have. She would with-hold sex for months at a time and he never once cheated on her. She kicked him out of the house he was paying for thirteen times in the four years they were together and during the last time, she got back together with her meth addicted ex and he started rediscovering his balls.
At that point, he and I reconnected by starting to work out together again (he used to have the most fantastic set of abs, but his ex was a little overweight and would accuse him of working out just to make her feel bad about her body). She started constantly calling and texting him (he was still paying for her phone bill and gave her three months after the break up to get another phone set up before he shut it off), alternatively wishing him happiness and berating and belittling him. Once the phone got shut off, the e-mails started - angry and demanding money from him. We grew closer in this time and now, a little over a year after their break up, we've decided to get married. I'm not sure how she found out, but she sent him a very angry e-mail (after many e-mails saying she was happy he was dating me and wishing us well) accusing him of cheating on her with me and basically telling him that he should have made himself available as her backup plan. And yet, he still can't justify blocking her e-mails (he refuses to even consider giving her his new phone number, though). He still has the patience of a saint, though we're still working on rebuilding his self-esteem.
Dear Mike, Since you refuse to take my calls and you have blocked my email, I am left with no options but this. I know you will read this, because you chose to end our relationship on this site and I know you enjoy reading these things. First, I was devastated when you disappeared on Christmas Eve, so much so I had a spontaneous miscarriage. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before. I was going to tell you everything on Christmas morning, sort of your present from me. Mike, my dearest love, the reason I had been eating so much, and gaining weight was because I was pregnant with our child. When we were in Milan, I hadn't taken my birth control for a while. That was on purpose. After out fight in August about having kids, I really thought about it, and I decided to make some changes in my life. I wanted to show you I was committed to you, so I made the decision to get pregnant. (That is why those sheets were special to me. Our baby was conceived on them.) I'm so sorry that I just didn't tell you sooner, but I wanted to be sure I could carry it to term. Mike, I was so scared about bringing a child into this messed up world. When I lost my parents at 6 years old, I promised I would never make my children grow up the way I did. That is why I told you I never wanted to have a child. Mike, I'm sorry, I was afraid I would fail as a parent. And now, I'm sorry, I have done exactly that. Mike, they did all they could, but she was just too early. She lived for a few minutes, just long enough for me to hold her. Mike, she was so beautiful. She had your nose. I could see both of us in her tiny face. I named her Sarah Rose, after your G-Mom.
Mike, please forgive me for not telling you everything sooner. I did so want to make this Christmas a new beginning for us. I had already told Max, I was quitting after the new year. That is why I was pushing Tiffany so hard; she was to take my place when I left the company. Please tell her to call Max, the job is still hers.
Mike, I just wanted you to know, you are and will always be my forever love. I never wanted anything in this world but to make you happy. I realize now I have failed at that too.
You asked for a present for Tiff's and your child. So here it is. I've left everything to you, the house in Tahoe will be paid off, and everything else is here in Scottsdale. I've signed everything into your name. I've always known I never "fit" in this world, and now that you are gone, I see no reason to continue this charade. I wish all three of you all the happiness possible.
Please go to the bird lady's house and get Pete and Polly. I told her they now belong to you. I am going now to be with our little girl. Maybe, if there really is a heaven, we will all be together some day. Until then, I will always be loving you and looking over you. My dearest love, farewell.
Tags: e
My ex and I had been together just a few months short of 9 years. The last four had been very serious looking at rings and all of that. The past year we have had been in a long distance situation but that was about to end. Well she meets some guy and dumps me over the phone a week before she was suppose to come visit. The whore couldn't even tell me to my face.
Tags: Crazy girl, Psycho
So I dated a girl for a little over a year during my freshman and sophomore years at college. She was pretty cool, bit crazy but you know wasn't anything bad at the time. Well she went to college for around 2 weeks and basically lost all control, went crazy on pills and alcohol and parties and ended up sleeping with some random guy. When she confessed she tried to make it seem like it was no big deal by saying, "It's okay, he couldn't even go all the way in before shooting off." So, needless to say, I was feeling hunky dory. I tried to stay with her but it wasn't the same. She was trying way to hard to stay with me and thought that being a sex maniac would fix everything. Negatory. So I sat her down when she came over one day and I said we needed to talk. I explained how I felt. She then said, "Are you breaking up with me?" I responded with, "Yes, I am." She then went wild-eyed and psycho and bellowed, " Are you breaking up with mmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?!?!" (When she said me, she started out softly then progressively got louder and louder) She then stormed up the stairs and out the front door to her car. She ran past my sister, which led to my sister saying, "Greggggggg, what'd you do (smirk like it was some joke)?" I then sat down with my sister, we watched an episode of the office and laughed heartily.
Tags: 2
My situation is unique for why i have such a shattered heart.... i was with my boyfriend for 6 months...i know its not that long but i loved him more than anything he was my best friend and i trusted him...and he got me pregnant....When i first told him the news he was excited and wanted me to keep the baby. Even though we're both really young and I myself am not ready to be a mother. But because i loved him and i wanted to be with im forever i thought maybe we could make this work. Then the next day he broke up with me through a text messege while i was at work. You can imagine how hurt i was. I couldnt even work the rest of that day because i was soooo hurt and confused. You're probably thinking that hes just an immature 21 year old and yes that is true but i cant shake the horrible heart breaking feeling over this. He will not give me an explination of any sort. He wont talk to me at all.
That's not even the worst part. I found out a week later he has a new girlfriend who has a baby. He is posting facebook status' that say how much he cant stop thinking about his "wife" and "baby" and he is as happy as he has ever been in his life. I know now that i shouldnt have looked at his facebook, and after reading that i promised myself i will NEVER look at it again. Its unbelievably heart breaking to know that he left me to be with that girl who has baby. I felt i had no other choice but to get an abortion. I dont want to be a single mother at this age. I dont think i could do it alone. I am so confused because i dont know what i would have done for him to leave me like that. I dont understand why he would want me to keep our baby then throw me away like trash and then run off with that other girl. He's rubbing my nose in it with those facebook posts. The pain i feel with this is excruciating. While im here miserablely heart broken wondering what i had done wrong he is out there with his new girlfriend he calls his "wife" and hes being a father to her baby. Also that girl he is with changed her last name on facebook to his last name, as if they were married. It is absolutly rediculous because i almost feel like he is doing all of this on purpose to get at me, but i also think maybe is real between them and they really do want to be married after only knowing eachother one week. Well for all i know they could have been going out when me and him were together, but i try not to think of it that way. I do have to mention that he didnt help pay for the abortion after i asked him to. He completely ignored me. So i have talked with his mother about my situation. She is on my side with this which is somewhat comforting but doesnt change what happend...
I dont know what i should do to work past this. I cant stop thinking about it. I have had past relationships and i thought i've been heartbroken before but nothing like this. This is pain i have never felt before and its horrible. I want answers. Everyone says I am young and ill move on and forget about all this over time. I just keep waiting around because maybe he will give me a explination for all of this. I NEVER saw this coming. Me and im were happy together and we also seen eachother every day so what happend makes no sense to me at all. I can imagine he met her one day and then BAM desided to get "married" and be a happy family. It's confusing and i dont understand.
Tags: ?
Well i was 15 when i meet this guy who did magic.He caught my attention so i built the courage to ask he to skip class with...remember i just met him.so he said yes and we went to a lake near our middle school.when ended up kissing and it felt so right...so we went out.unfortunately it was to much of a physical relationship so we broke up over the summer.my mom was so glad because she hated him.then school came around and we got back together and things were so different.i loved it,i loved him.and loved me.then we end up breakin up again over the phone when i was in a different country.so when i come back we start talkin and clearing things out.turns out he cheated on me with his best friend who just happened to come from illinois when i left to nicaragua.nice right.he ripped my heart out right from my chest and threw it into a fire.no matter how much i wanted to hate him, i couldnt.then school comes around again and now im 16.Neither of us wants to give up on us being together.we think we are the ones for each other.shit is so complicated right now with us.we fight one day and then the next we are happy to see each other.and now to boot; a friend of mine comes out sayin he has like me since last year.truthfully when we are texting i like hm to.but then when we are at school there is no spark.i dont find him attractive.but is still love talkin to him cause he makes me smile.i dont know what to do.i cant deny the love i still have for my ex bf.
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