Searching for "passion"

27 Results For 'passion'

Shayla

October 12, 2015 @ (Fredericksburg Va)

I really thought that he was the one. After 2 failed attempts at marriage and a failed long term relationship of 5yrs and countless miserable dates... He walked into my life and was what I thought I needed. The lies came slowly despite my inner thoughts of knowing the truth that he was indeed married. He assured me he wasn't and we continued what seemed to be a solid connection. We laughed, we shared jokes, we made love.... The quickies and the long passionate kind. Then he dropped the bomb on me that he had 4 kids and was unhappily married. He allowed me to make the decision to keep seeing him telling me that he was soon to get a divorce and said he had been looking at places to live and gave me a date of when he had planned to move out. A plan that seemed like it had been thought of for sometime. I believed him and continued to see him against my beliefs. We continued to get to know each other on a personal level. He acted like he didn't care about anything in his world except me (and his kids of course). I just knew he was going to divorce his wife. Not for me but for the simple fact that he too wanted to be happy and just wasn't in his marriage which happened to be dead before I came along. He traveled often taking me with him but definitely calling me religiously on the trips where he couldn't. Then one day it all changed. The day I said the "L" word. We had only been dating for 8m and I only knew for 2 that he was married. The L word scared him... It scared me but it was how I felt, so enamoured by him I couldn't help it. After that moment the phone calls became lesser and lesser. The good morning and good night text messages slowed down. After weeks of frustration I confronted him. It was then that he told me that he didn't feel the same way as I had felt and that he didn't know if he ever would or could. It stabbed me in the heart b/c I sacrificed so much of me, my morals, my beliefs to be with him. I stopped dating other people and was exclusive only to him. I was happy living in the moment but often times thought about a future with him. He decided that maybe we should cool off and it would be best to stop it now before I got hurt anymore than I already had been. He said he liked me a lot like a lot (his words) and wanted to still be friends. In that moment of anger I wanted it all and if I couldn't with him or have him love me after 8m of daring and sacrificing then we should stop talking all together. I reached out to him a week later. We cleared the air and realized some things were said out of anger,fear and a lot of alcohol but the truth is they were still said. We still talk some but just as "friends" conversation initiated by me mostly because although i know I need to let him go it's too hard to.

Broken (part 3)

April 21, 2015 @ (toronto)

Tags: bad breakup

He says she has made his life a living hell and he wants to get out. I say whatever makes you happy and he gives me this smile that makes my heart stop. I lie to him and say i don't have a boyfriend. I go out of my apartment and call him. I say he's here. He says great now go and have fun i love you. I do too i say and don't mean it. Because all of a sudden i realize no other amount of love will ever come as close as the way i love him. I finally realize when people say if its love you will know. I don't care that he has two kids, i don't care that his wife is a bitch, i don't care that he has so much baggage that he literally is the baggage claim. I care about none of it. Because when i am with him i need nothing. The world without him means nothing. And what is a world without nothing to live for? So we go on vacation. We leave the country and go away. At first we are friend and nothing else. It starts with silly jokes, past memories, the brush of his hands against mine, the way he accidentally touches me, the way he pokes me when he thinks i am not listening. Then before you know it you're both falling madly in love. I had already been in love but this time its his turn to feel what i feel. And he does. He feels it with a passion i did not see coming. Then the planning of the future comes. He promises me a grand wedding, the telling of our families, the happiness our fathers would feel at the news. We talk about how we would raise his kids and whether i should learn how to cook healthy options. He leaves and i cry at the airport. I break up with my boyfriend and forget all about him. As if he never existed. I stay up until 4 am everyday so i can be on his time. I sleep all day and am up all nigh. He's worth it i say. I get too tired to go to work, too tired to go out with friends he's all i think of. He calls he says its over the divorce is final and he will send me a ticket to vista him after january (2015). I cry whether its from joy or the foreshadowing of our future i can't tell. I quit my job, i sell the few things i owe, i pack my life up and go to vegas with my best friends and he hits Paris with his. I am on the phone with him on new years i say happy new years love of my life. He says happy new years my soul but i have to go now my guy friends are waiting for me. I feel a pang of something a flutter of wrongness but i ignore it and keep on dousing champagne. I smile and think to myself this year is going to be great.

Perplexed

January 31, 2015 @ (Northeast US)

Tags: Whoodini

A few weeks ago I experienced a break-up. Except it wasn't really a break-up. The man with whom I felt I was falling in love with and whom I sincerely felt was in love with me....disappeared. I reached out to him twice within a week after his whoodini act, and have not received a response. Its as if he just evaporated. I feel like I've been imagining all the time that we spent together, all the mornings we woke up cuddling and all the amazingly passionate nights that we shared.

Where is my boyfriend????

I'm writing because I am confused and would like to share a bit of my story. I was aggressively pursued by a sensitive, attractive, fun and interesting guy. I didn't do any of the pursuing, it was all on his end. After 5 months of dating him and him telling me he wanted to spend his life with me and loved me, and took me out, and dinners, and drinks, and fun and blah blah blah....we spent New Years together and the next week he prepared this amazing "honeymoon night" in his apartment with candle and tea and incense, and everything perfect. He gave my a gift after we had sex and we cuddled and had a fun night...

We kissed in the morning and said goodbye.

I haven't heard from him since. This was a month ago. I'm totally confused and angry that I was sold on this bologna. After 5 months of dating. I don't understand. I now want to send him a message and tell him off and call him out on his lunacy, but I am stopping myself. I have so many questions. So much to say, but I don't want to give him the satisfaction of even knowing that I'm giving him one more second of my thoughts.

I seriously feel like I hate him right now. I hope he is miserable and I hope that he has the worst Valentine's Day ever. I hope he realizes what a coward he is for not breaking things off more respectfully. I feel hurt, confused, and disrespected.

I want to move on, but its hard when you don't have a real ending, and so many questions. I know I deserve more, but I was just blindsided!! I didn't even really like him that much until recently.

Moreover, I hope this experience makes me more aware in the future, and I hope I am able to grow from this. I'm happy to share my story and know that I am not alone. None of us are. There is someone better out there, but in the mean time, it is not easy.

Aubery

May 30, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: just tired and disappointed in myself

he was a friend from a long to one of the very few people i talk to with all my heart. And he is quiet perfect actually very well natured, good at heart, understanding and doesnt have any sort of bad habits. so naturally i said yes when he wanted to be more than friend because i did not find a reason to say no....
but i did not feel the spark that intense feelings towards him.... i thought that slowly i would fall in love but i never did... i care a lot about him but i dnt think its to the level to be called as love... and more over i dont have passion or lust i generally get bored when he tries to make out... but he genuinely loves me (much mare then i deserve actually)... i kept waiting (careful not to break his heart) that suddenly i would realize that i love him... but it became suffocating especially when he practically glows with love in my presence... i desperately try to return that emotion but i just cannot... so now i just gave up trying to feel that non-existent love and decided to move on... i know i broke his heart and i feel so terrible... was my decision if not right at-least reasonable ?

Tori

November 10, 2012 @ (virginia)

Tags: fell out of love

So i had been with this guy for almost two years. He had a rough childhood and back ground. I helped through alot of that. After about 6 months of being together he moved about 2 hours away. It became a long distance relationship. It was fine at first but in the past few months we had started to fight alot and just not get along well. But when we were actually together things were great. He said he needed a break, and at the end of this break he broke up with me and said "im not inlove with you like i used to be. i still care but the passion is gone" i am completely torn up if i was mad at him or i thought he wasnt worth it i could get over him. but im not mad at him feelings change and he really is a great guy

Robert

June 02, 2012 @ (California)

Tags: Morrissey

"My Larissa", "Baby", "hunny"… fuck. In your head you broke up with me 3 months ago but it took you til 3 weeks ago to really do it. That’s how complicated you are. To lose your feelings is one thing, but to play pretend and say you love me when you don’t really care about me is fucked. You’re a coward and I don’t respect you for what you put me through. You don’t want to call me and rather email me? I miss… whom you used to be, the shy girl with brown eyes, big hair and red lips. I don’t miss the lying little girl you are to me now. It makes sense why you didn’t like serious moments, or taking pictures, or being around my family at times, and why you acted up, said disrespectful things and treated me the way you did. You’re the worst girlfriend I’ve ever had.

I saw it in the first place when you cheated on me, I made the mistake of forgiving you and what happened thereafter wasn’t fair to me. I was doing everything I could, the best I could do to believe we can be happy together. You were bringing me down, you were making me think I was doing something wrong and you broke my heart. I spent all this time getting to know you; I always went out of my way to be with you. In-between working a lot, skating as much as I could, growing my business, getting fired, having you cheat on me, all the depressing feelings, you going out drinking too much, me not being motivated to skate, bummed out over everything, to getting new jobs, significantly improving my situation, then, to watch you lead me to a shot in the dark.

My ex cheated on me, as you know. Remember we said we wouldn’t ever put each other through the same things others did to us? Lucky for me I was cheated on twice in a row, right? How did I get such good aim with finding very messed up people? It’s a real bummer. I knew you were hiding something from me, I knew I couldn’t trust you and I went to your house that night for the same reason I sent you a birthday card you didn't deserve... to get the truth. No more lies Larissa, take my information off your resume and don’t give anyone my letter of recommendation. If I get a call I will tell them that you never worked for me, I will be honest and admit it’s all bullshit and that you are not a good candidate.

You’re brown jacket you left in my trunk is in the trash.

Life is going to hit you eventually and it will be a night-terror come true. I showed you what you’ve been missing, freed you from your broken home, into mine countless nights and held your hand through the ups and downs. I looked out for you and was there for you. You cover up your sadness pretty well but one day it will all come out when you least expect it. You can’t hide it forever. You are weak. You have a lot of growing up to do. You’re not looking for someone to sweep you off your feet. You’re lonely, you are lost, but I found you and met you for some reason. But someone who deserves me and will treat me right is in my future. I’m a good man, a gentleman, one of the most positive people you’ll ever meet, I have a passionate heart, desire to be someone great and I did my best.

It’s fitting you have a tattoo of a rose, roses are beautiful but every rose has it’s thorns and they hurt, especially when you don’t deserve to feel them. This whole thing is a shame and it’s much too late for goodbyes. Pray Larissa, God knows what you did. Pray for goodwill, kindness and respect. He has been lifting my spirit and giving me strength to part with loving you. You need Jesus and you’ll eventually need to seek my forgiveness if you really do value me as a friend for any of the rest of your life. Learn the difference between right and wrong.

It didn’t have to be like this.

Anony-mous

January 09, 2012 @ (la)

Tags: trust, heartbreak

i've been with a girl for about 1.5 years. i met her in nyc. i'm originally from the west coast, but i moved to the city 2 years ago. anyway, throughout our entire time together, it felt like a never-ending "honeymoon phase". we were passionately in love with each other, and extremely affectionate. i moved in with her a year ago because i lost my job. she was kind enough to open her home to me. she's been nothing but amazing. her family loves me. she loves me. we had plans for the future, even plans of marriage.

though, at this moment, i am currently in la (for a short vacation) and she's in nyc. she broke up with me on the phone this morning because i'm too insecure. i have trust issues (that i am working on) and she's just tired. she's giving up on this relationship because she's tired of my lack of trust. that, i understand. but i'm confused because it was so sudden.

i think it's serious this time. we had a joint bank account for our apartment savings, and she removed her share of the money. now it's almost half-empty.

but, i'm flying back to nyc tomorrow morning. i thought about not flying back at all to avoid seeing her (just because it will be too hard), but i can't not show up for work. i at least have to put in my two weeks and get the rest of my stuff at her place. i also have unfinished business in nyc that can't be left neglected.
i also need more closure than this. i've been crying constantly all day. i've been going into my car and crying hysterically so no one would hear me. i am going through so much pain because i'm starting to believe that this is really IT. she's been the most amazing girlfriend to me, so supportive, faithful, genuine, and perfect. her imperfections are perfect to me.
i hope this was out of anger. and that she didn't mean it. otherwise, i'm on a one-way flight back to los angeles with a broken heart and a broken dream.

Anon

January 08, 2012 @ (USA )

Tags: Cheating, first love,

We started dating my freshmen year of high school. I thot he was so cute but my friend was talking with him. I was very jealous and I eventually told him I liked him an he admitted he was only talking to my friend to get closer to me. He was 16, popular, and everyone loved him. A few days after us talking I gave him my virginity and he told me he loved me. I told him so did I. We had sex again 2 days later and he asked me to be his girlfriend. Of course I said yes! Our relationship was so playful, we were best friends and lovers at the same time. We were very passionate to be so young but nothing could separate us. About a month into our relationship I started hearing things about him cheating on me, I was devastated. I demanded he give me his Facebook password as I was out of town at the time and couldn't look through his fone or anything. And to my astonishment he had msgd girls on there then thought he had deleted the msgs but I found all of them. I forgave him tho after a big fight and many tears cause in fact I loved him and he was my first. A few months later down the road I had still found out he had cheated on me random times by making out with other girls and I heard he had sex with two of his older brothers girlfriends but it was never proven so I still don't know if that was true. But me and him were closer than anyone . I had given him everything Nd totally devoted my life to him. He seemed to truleylove me he just had commitment problems as his dad had cheated on his mom, it ran in the family. He proposed to me (silly I know, we were so young, but at this time he was 17) I said yes and we just kept it to ourselves and only told close friends. Around the time we had been dating for 6 months I had a pregnancy scare and had to take the plan B pill. This shook things up and made us think about if we really wanted to be together forever. We decided we did and our relationship just got stronger. We had dropped nearly all our friends and it was always me and him. He still continued to cheat wich really really killed me but I pretended to believe him when he denied it and promised he would never do that to me again like he did before so I didn't lose him. Nearing our 8th month together I went to California for a couple of weeks to visit relatives and go to the beach. We talked constantly when I was fone and it hurt us to be away from each other so long . He would call me every night and cry and tell me how much he loved andissed me and that he wanted us to try and have a baby when I got back, I thought about it and considered Then changed my mind. I wanted to wait. He reluctantly agreed and when I got back in town we were together 24/7 . I was looking thru his fine and found pictures on his email of naked girls and he had sent them pictures of his dick!! I was so angry I screamed and said it was the last time I would deal with this and I was done with him and we were Ina parking lot and causing such a scene the cops got called. We were told to leave and I made him drive me home and he did and the breakup was long and drawn out and he cried for hours every night and begged me to stay and threatened to kill himself, he ran away and then came back and started hanging out with this girl about 3 weeks from our breakup. I was glad he was finally moving on since I couldn't deal with his drama. They started datin and now 6 mOnths from our breakup she is pregnant and they are engaged. I still have a special place in my heart for him but I have moved on completely. I am now dying an amazing guy and have been for about a month, not a very long time but I have a connection with him and am very happy. Sometimes it's best to move on from first loves cause they may not have been right and he cheated and hurt me way to much. I have trust problems thanks to him but what I went thru with him made me strong Nd made me who I am today so I am thankful for it.

Wasn\\

December 12, 2011 @ (Edmonton, Alberta)

Tags: 1

I was clear on my intentions when I told the universe what I wanted "Somebody who loves me as I am" and he showed up. He was funny, flirty, nervous, self conscious and lacked confidence. Why? God knows because he was handsome, fit, funny and available. We worked together and at first i did not want to work with him because he had a sarcastic and surly streak, but over time he won me with his charm. It was an intense and passionate love right from the start, but i had to acknowledge that even with all his flirting, I was the one who asked him out. He reciprocated and we had afternoon dates over lunch and long walks. then we started sleeping together and I told him that I loved him. That didn't go over very well. We dated steadily for 2 months when he went on a holiday. The people he was going to meet up with seemd a strange mix but I didn't know him that well at the time.

Turns out he met up with a woman from his past who drifted into the spot of "platonic friend." I said he needed to make clear his intentions with her. She kept calling and he kept answering.
Then she became this regular part of his/our life but she lived in the states so was far removed. I started to get jealous and we had our first of many break ups over his lack of honesty and the way he painted the picture of her involvement in his life. i was in love with him, saw him every day at work and couldn't break free form his emotional pull. I took a transfer. that worked for a week or two and then we started speaking again and seeing each other again but it was not th same. He started to pint out my flaws, I saw his evasiveness and aloof behaviour more clearly. We started to disagree. Eventually i watched him openly flirt with another woman at a cocktail party and knew that it was time to move on. He denied it of course, called me jealous, said I was hot and cold with him. We had tickets to the company Christmas party so agreed to still go together. there was no magic anymore. He won a door prize of jewellery at the party and reluctantly gave it to me. My co-workers thought his distance was strange. I tried so hard not to belittle him or be angry with him but it was hard. He drove me home, we said our goodbyes, he was cold and distant, the man I knew hm to be in the beginning, the man i didn't want to work next to. I asked him why he would start dating me again if he wasn't that interested. He said he was sorry about that. And then it was over. Now I'm working on a different floor and working through this breakup so that I can continue on in finding love. I just wasn't clear in my intentions.

Danielle

March 31, 2011 @ (Chicago)

Tags: breakup, first, relationship, heartbroken

My boyfriend and I were together for just over two years. It was the first serious relationship either of us had been in, and we were in love. He fought hard to win me over, and he made me feel more special than I have ever felt in my life. He was my world. I trusted him completely and never in my wildest dreams imagined that he could break my heart.

During the last few months of our relationship, I felt a subtle shift. It was nothing to raise any alarms, but I definitely noticed it. I realized that I was usually the one to initiate affection, or to plan an outing, or even to call. He was still kind and loving, but it felt as though his passion had faded.

I confronted him about it. I asked him if he was still in love with me. The moment I said it, I regretted it. He suddenly looked very confused, and the second he began talking I knew I had opened Pandora's Box. With a pained look in his eyes, he told me he wasn't sure anymore -- that our relationship had become "comfortable." He said he needed time to think.

After a week without contact, he he came over to my apartment. I felt optimistic; I was convinced that we would just end up having a serious talk addressing the inevitable loss of the puppy love stage in our relationship. I was wrong. He told me that he was no longer in love with me, that he no longer wanted to be my boyfriend, but he couldn't imagine losing me as a friend. In that moment I felt my world collapse. I pleaded with him to reconsider, I begged him to stay. Nothing I said had any effect, and he left my place in tears.

It's been six months since I've seen him, and my heart is still in pieces. Our parting was so sudden, I still feel like I'm in shock. After a few months of trying to remain his friend, I quit. The pain of being platonic was too great for me, and my pain was too great for him. Now I'm too scared to reach out to him again for fear of the pain that comes with knowing you've been replaced. All I want is to be back in his arms, but he's let me go and hasn't looked back.