Tags: Lesbian, blindside, experiment, straight
Background knowledge: I am a 24 year old lesbian, known my whole life and came out at 16. She is a almost 23 year old "free spirit" never had been with a girl before but always said she'd never closed it out of her options.
We first talked in May of 2011 and there was instantly a connection between us. She asked me to hang out in the beginning of June for the first time and we hit it off. We went out with a group of friends but me and her were inseperable. I knew she was "straight" so I didn't make any advances but she sure did!! She kept telling me how hot I was, she invited me to stay at her house that night(even made sure to mention I wouldn't be sleeping on the couch), and grabbed my hand to hold it to the next bar we walked to. As we sat there talking she grabbed my head and began making out with me. Wow! We walked back to her place and innocently kissed and fell asleep. She walked me to my final college class the next morning and we were glued to each other since that night. Our "relationship" grew over the next 9 months into something I saw as perfect, one of a kind, unique, and new. She told me she felt the same way. She had never felt so real before and that this was truly the relationship she always dreamed of and I was the person she always dreamed for. I was "the one". The sex was aweesome(in my opinion), and she would tell me how she couldn't wait to spend her life with me, have babies with me, and how truly amazing I treated her. So things are rolling just like they had been when suddenly she tells me, "I don't know about us anymore. I'm so confused and I'm just not sure what our future holds." I let her think for a week and hope she is just saying crazy things and we can make it better. We have a PHENOMENAL weekend but things seem distant still as the week comes. I ask if things have gone back to normal and if she still believes I'm the one and what we have is unique and one of a kind. She doesn't reply. I ask if she wants to break up. Her response, "No! I mean.....I don't know". That kind of said it all. So we hung up after that and she didn't contact me for an entire fucking week!! Blindsided by this breakup, everything seemed perfec for 9 months, then she gets confused and ends it. We finally talk after a week of not taking and she was supposidely so sad and miserable over the situation. After giving me BS reasons that we broke up for 30 minutes, she finally "got honest" with me and let me know that she loved me as a friend and as a person but got that confused with being in love and that she tried to convince herself that she was "in love" but that she doesn't think she is. She could never see a future with me she said. AKA she isn't gay/can't be with a girl! Talk about a fucking slap in the fucking face. It's the closure I needed but now I'm just pissed that I was apart of her experiment that she likely knew the results of early after we met but didn't let me know till now. Plus for her to pretend she was in love with me and wanted a future with me is BS. She isn't the first "straight" girl to do this to me but she is the first to let it last 9 months. She wants to be friends and will talk/text but I feel like it's not a good idea. I think any "pain" she felt is gone now and she is relieved and fine because she "cleared her conscious" and got honest. I don't think she has any pain over losing "us" or this "relationship" and that sucks because I thought it was something different for 9 months but I guess it was all a lie.
Tags: (trust, love, friends, life)
Second year of high school we became friends. But he wasn't one of my usual friends, we would poke and push each other around playfully. We would compete over little things. Our friendship slowly grew, he didn't let anyone in easily. But even at that young age people always teased us about being together. Four years later he was my best friend and much more, we went out and it started off great. I was suffering from depression at the time and he got me help, he helped me through all of it. I felt safe with him. He didn't really have many close friends except me, i felt like his only one and i loved it. We would fight a lot but we always made it through. Then when high school finished we broke up, we had enough. I still wanted him but maybe only because i felt lonely. We were determined to stay friends. But as soon as he moved out of home and into the city he made his own friends and one night we found ourselves throwing abuse at each other, i missed him and i was angry that he was absent in my life. Anyway as i began to cry on the phone telling him how much i actually missed him, he began to laugh, saying he didn't need me, he didn't care. I can't even recognize him anymore.
Early in our relationship he said he would never break up with me. He said we would always be best friends. He seemed so great but in the end he turned out like every other selfish bastard. I've lost my trust in people, i hope one day i can regain it. More than anything though, i see how much he's enjoying life right now and how i'm not and its difficult to get through.
Tags: Long distance1, internet, dating, sad, breakup
Bitter sweet Internet love life
This is a true story about my own love life and how it started.. and sadly ended
-----------FlashBack-----------
I looked to my right and then to my left, I saw a guy with a cat head on? He seemed pretty interesting, but being the random person I was I walked up to him and said "Hai how's life?", "It's awesome right now" I giggled, "So what's your name?" the crowd around him answered "--------" I didn't even notice they were there and made me jump out of my skin!
------End of Flashback------
The day we first met was a memory turning hazy, but I never knew he would become my best friend. At the time I first met him I was a 1st year in middle school and was pretty dumb, but I didn't care as long as I was having fun at school, I was the type of person who could make anyone smile! I didn't take anything seriously at the time as in friendships, and relationships, I was all about living for the moment and always acting silly, but that would eventually change. Jerome was a well known person, I'm pretty sure he had more friends then I would ever have in my school years, but he was funny and also serious, he always put his friends as his number one priority and that's what I liked about him! I started talking to "------" everyday, and I would always learn something new about him, my friendly feelings eventually turned into love. One day my friend Christopher and I had started talking about the most random topics and I saw "-----" walk over to me and sit close to like he always did , I told Chris, "HEY CHRISTOPHER, are you going to pay for our wedding!" I realized what I had just said and started to blush, "but I have to pay for mine first!" he whined , ever since that day "------" and I became girlfriend and boyfriend, we exchanged numbers and the first thing he said was, "YES, I can prank call you now!" "Oh shush and text me cause I have to go, BAI "------" I LOVE YOUH!<3" "Love you too!<3" After that he imminently texted me, he made me feel special inside like I was the only girl he could have, I guess he had me falling head over heels for them, but things change... The day of my birth was coming up and I was so excited on what he would get me!! It could be anything I ever dreamed of. It finally came and what I got was a diamond ring as in an engagement ring!! He purposed to me after just one month and I felt so happy!! But after that my life would change forever... It was Friday may 20th that I received a text saying he had asked a girl out and she said yes. I wasn't happy about it, but I tried to act happy, but failed miserably. Inside I felt real jealous even though this relationship was just over the Internet I couldn't help but feel a little ache in my heart. As the weeks had gone by we started texting less as he distanced himself from me, but then his friend had died one day and that made the distance seem even longer, as he was always busy helping out others, even though I was a priority I felt like an option which hurt me the most... as a result I... cheated on him, I cheated on him because I wanted him to feel what I felt when he told me he had a girlfriend, that was The lowest point I had ever gone to in a relationship, and I felt empty inside. I told "------" all about "Joey" (a.k.a moo moo) at first he seemed completely fine with it but as I told him more, we had arguments that were pointless, he eventually found out that moo moo wasn't in real life but was on the Internet, I made a fatal mistake of hanging out with "Joey" that day as he gave me a '<3' sign right in front of "------" After that day "------" no longer talked to me, he ignored me, and all their was left was for "Joey" to fill the void I had in my heart. After a successful relationship "Joey" finally ended it, saying we were going to fast... I no longer had anyone to cover up the sadness that they left me, and started to cry everyday waiting for them to come back to me. I became obsessed and eventually had thoughts of suicide, but I never did have the courage to cut into my arm. In my mind I knew no one would want me anymore from the terrible thing I've done to "------", and decided to never love again. All I ever wanted was Jerome's attention and acceptance, I had eventually got it but lost it so easily.
"Yes, this whole relationship thing was over the Internet, but it didn't matter to me because I felt so close to him that even distance couldn't tear me apart from him, I know it was naive of me to think it would last even though I cheated on him, I still hoped the relationship would still make it through"
Tags: me me me
Well this break up was all me.. So me and my boyfriend had so many fights this year. Him disrepecting hanging up on he all the time i wanted to talk. He chose XBOX or me WTF. Anyways i said lets go to a dance he said okay. Then the next day he calls me and says Hi um i am up north at my cousin house i got to go. I got pissed and called him back and said did you forget about the dance? its tomorrow. He said yeah i forgot about that sorry. I said fine whatever. then hung up so i txted him and said why did you forget about what we was doing tomorrow? If you loved me so much like you say you do then wouldnt you have forgotten about tomorrow. I am sick of you doing this to me all the freakin time i can not and will not stand for this. BYE! He never called never txted back nothing so i thought i was over. Then Trent txted me and wanted to hang out so i said sure why not. He said okay i will be at your place in a min. I was scared i was nervous. I have only hung out,made out, shit like that with my boy. I knew what Trent wanted and yet i went with him and did everything. His friend Kyle txted and got mad at me for doing stuff with Trent when i knew Kyle liked me i just said sorry it shouldnt have happend. Kyle wanted me to tell my boy so I told him and he didnt want anything to do with me :( so there forth i want him back and dont ever want to hurt or let him go :( help me!
Tags: 1
My boyfriend of six years broke up with me valentines day. Completely outta the blue I wake up that morning to a text by him saying that he doesn't know what to tell me bout our plans for that day cause he met a girl hes ''been talking to" and she takes up all his time now and he has no use for me now. He told me get lost. It was the most brutal heartbreak I ever felt. We'd spent the three days prior to that together and talking bout what kinda things we'd like to do together in life. He'd told me we were meant for each other the very night before...and to do it on valentines day was the cruelest thing. He wouldn't answer his phone or texts that day. The next day he texted he wanted to talk and see me. I said no. Two days of continually asking me I finally agreed. He sat right in front of me at my kitchen table and told me he was confused and didn't know whAt he wanted and that the new gf wasn't even really his gf yet. He basically buttered me up with compliments and I believed him like a fool. The very next day he invited himself over started acting like a complete jerk by texting her continuously and then saying after 45 min into our dinner date that he was done and he had to take me home cause he had somewhere to. I said whats wrong with you I don't understand. He went crazy yelling and screaming for me to get the hell out of his car and that he hates me and not to invite him over again. I said are you on drugs or something cause you invited yourself. He drew his fist back at me like to punch me and I started to cry cause I'd never seen anything like this ever. He had instantly changed. He threw his coke on me as I got out the car and was pushing on me to get out making me fall. I was completely freaked out. This was not the same guy I'd Been with for the last six years of my life which now feel completely wasted. This was like something out of a scary movie. I'm completely devastated and don't know what to do or why this is happening. I think maybe he is on drugs cause I've discovered he's been taking some of my prescriptions from my purse here in the last two months. It's only thing I can think of. . I also was told by him that he'd ran his car into a ditch drunk with a few of his new friends in the car with him the night before he came over the first day we talked. He said they'd been celebrating his buddy's 21st bday and that this particular friend who I've tried to invite to do things with us and to bring along his gf, well I got told that friend doesn't like me so that's why I'm getting dumped. Please if anybody on here can possibly relate or just tell me anything,to help this terrible thing I'm going through I would very much appreciate your advice or comments. Thanks
Tags: bestfriend, heartbreak
Ok so he's my bestfriend and all that crap.. He went out with both of my girl bestfriends and apparently "loved" them..but then he falls "in love" with me and stuff and asks me out and I of course said yes. But then he gets suspended from school and I don't see him for about 3 weeks I don't talk w him or communicate in any way w him and its driving me crazy! And sO he finally gets his Facebook back and I send him a message but he totally ignores me cuz he hasn't answered and I sent him almost a week ago. Then people tell me that he's cheatIng on me but I don't eaisly believe rumours but you never know rite? And so finally I break up w him feeling totally depressed that I did and I don't know if he knows yet cuz I just sent it today.. And I totally regret it but it felt right and then it feels soooo wrong..and now I'm left w nothing..but a broken heart (as cliche as that sounds)
Tags: vday breakup
Its valentines night, and this site seems to be an awesome outlet, so here's my story.. Boyfriend of 8 mos and I had a mutual breakup on new years day. I instantly regretted it and wanted him back. I was depressed for 2 weeks while we tried to maintain a friendship. I then found out he felt the same way I had about the breakup, but I was slightly hesitant in getting back together because his actions just weren't matching his words.. For a whole month now he's been fucking around with my feelings telling me he wants to get back and still loves me but then forgetting to call or blowing me off. Its emotional torture hoping for something that continuously disappoints you. He finally ended that cycle last night telling me he can't give me what I need and that its over, BUT that he still hoped to get back together someday and grow old with me..this was a man I'd been best friends with for years, and who had at one time treated me like gold. I didn't hear from him today at all, and like a fool I waited to. I know its over and will never be, today was my last disappointment from him..happy freakin vday.
Tags: Best Friend, Messy, Life Goes on,
So I've been through a lot this past year and I feel like I am falling into the same pattern. It all started when I came out of the closet in February of 2008, my best friend didn't really know how to handle it. I could tell that he really wasn't okay with it, what I didn't know was that it was because he was actually gay too. So a few months after I came out out he eventually told me he was fine with it, and it was one of the happiest moments of my life. As time passed I noticed a change in him and then in July of 2009 he came out to me, and my reaction was well a little surprised. I never would have thought he was ever gay, he tried so hard to conceal that he was gay, he even dated and slept with girls, so it took some real evidence to prove that he wasn't messing with me. So he told me about the guy he had been seeing and it was all fine and dandy. Since I had met my best friend I always found him attractive, but now he was actually available. Summer turned to fall and soon enough he told me that he wasn't gay anymore, that 'it was a lifestyle choice he didn't wish to pursue.' I didn't believe him then and I don't believe him now mostly because I've seen him on a gay dating site recently. But never the less I still really liked him. He showed me this dating site that he used to meet guys and he signed me up, even though 'he wasn't gay anymore' he always insisted that I go out and meet guys, he was rather adamant which I found a bit odd, considering he was never interested in my love life before. Things began to get messy when he started to act out and act well a little recklessly, mostly because we and all of our friends were turning 19 and could start drinking, so he'd drive drunk, and he would do just do the dumbest things. This behavior went on for a year which brings us to 2011. 2011 was a very hard year for me. One day in the middle of July and I don't know the exact date, but he came over with some stuff I left at his house and he handed the items to me. I asked what was wrong and if he wanted to get a coffee, and he said 'Why would we do that?' and I said 'Because we're friends' and he replied 'Are we?' After that he turned away and I never saw him again. A month later I found out it was because I had feelings for him and that he had told all of our friends that I was a liar and horrible friend, that I was somehow delusional and that I had gone around spreading lies that he was gay when I told maybe 2 people who didn't say a word. So in the end he turned out to just be a coward who was trying to save his own ass who didn't care who he hurt in the process. Its been 7 months and I still haven't spoken or seen him, in the end I realized he would never have the courage to tell people how he really felt about anything or that he would never have the courage to tell anyone that he was a homosexual, and sometimes I feel like I may have hindered that. But its not always going to be my fault the blame will fall on him and all the lies and all the pettiness will catch up to him and everyone will see him for what he is. I won't vilify him and he shouldn't vilify me, we were both in our own ways wrong. I don't miss him anymore, I don't even want to be friends with him, mostly because of this one simple fact, I was his best friend and he always told me we would be friends no matter what, and I think to myself;I was hi best friend and look what he did to me? Why would I want to be friends with such a selfish person? Who put his own need to hide a silly secret above my feelings, I guess I wasn't as important to him as he liked to say, because if I was he would have at least talked to me and tried to work it out. I won't ever go back because I know if I did everything would be like it was before, he wouldn't respect me and it would be a misrealble disaster.
I'm moving on and more and more I am forgeting him, it started in September when I realized I couldn't remember the sound of his voice or his laugh, then things about him started to slip, and now I am starting to forget what he looked like, I feel like one day I'll need to grab a picture to remember him.
Tags: sadd
We were dating for almost 3 years, we used to be so in love (or so i thought) he had a bff that i disliked, they were always together. I always had a feeling he liked her sinse everytime they were together he wasn't that sweet, but yet i desided to ignore it. Months passed by everything was cool then he stoped being sweet, didnt say i love you back and me me feel unapreciated his excuse always was "remember you're my first gf I don't have relationship experiance" then one day she came back from who knows where and they desided to hang out (not alone but with a group of friends)i didnt know this. He would just ignore my txt messages and calls so i was worried and asked his friend and thats when he told me they were together. I desided I couldn't take this anymore and i told him i needed time and then he asked "you're breaking up with me?" i was really stupid and i changed my mind And i said no and i told him what was wrong but then he said that he needs a break and broke up with me I begged him not to leave me for 4 days and he desided to give us another chance.. Months later everything was perfect but then he broke up with me because a guy posted a perverted wallpost on my facebook wall (i didnt even see it before he broke up with me) insted of telling him to backoff or somthing he leaves me. I blocked the guy and tried explaining what happened to him but he didn't listen. we tried being friends but then i told him to give us one last chance he agreed to it but it felt like i was forcing him to be with me sense he told me he didn't think we were going to work out and he was never sweet even though I tried everything to make him love me. I gave up and told him it took me a long time to understand but now I know he doesn't want me and I broke up with him. Then one day I found this amazing guy that treats me like a princess but we were just friends. After about 3 months he tells me he still loves me blah blah blah and that he never stoped loving me and he was soo sweet but by this time I was already over him and I told him I liked someone else already but he insisted that he still loved me. I ended up getting with the guy and now hes mad at me for getting with another guy and doesnt want anything to do with me.
I wish him luck and Im glad I found someone who treats me right.
Tags: example1
I met him in 7th grade. We were friends, then 8th grade came around, and we got together. We were together for 2 1/2 years when we ended. He cheated on me with another girl. He had hickeys on his neck. I was so...broken. He was my first love, my first everything, and I was so in love with him. People may say that at my age, we still don't know what love is, but, I do. I gave 2 1/2 years of my life and spent it with him. We had so many good times, but also, so many bad. He was always mean to me, calling me names, ignoring me when I was upset, and cheating on me. Hes always cheated on me since day 1. But everytime we broke up, I blamed myself. I never felt good enough for him, and I felt like maybe if I changed the way I was, he'd like me more and he'd start treating me better. But last week, he cheated again. I broke up with him, and it hasn't been easy for me. I love him so much, and I just want to know what I ever did to deserve this, why I was never enough. I want to be loved back, and appreciated. He haws new girlfriend now, and its tearing me apart. I'm so.hurt in all of this, and he doesn't care. I don't know how I'm going to get over this. And I wanna know why I want someone who doesn't want me. Its hard spending that long with someone, and then not having them at all. :/
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