Searching for "mental"

26 Results For 'mental'

-E

November 16, 2016 @ (UK)

Tags: bad break up, I still like her

Right,so we dated for slightly over 4 months(short time,I know) but never the less I still extremely loved her,and still do.Our relationship gave no signs of falling apart,at least not any that I could see.We were your typical teenagers in love.Always by each others sides.Holding hand.Constantly texting each other. Every time I spent time with her,I was able to forget all my worries and I finally understood what that cliche about love meant.Everything just seemed so perfect.I loved her and she loved me,but things began going wrong.Because of me.All because of me I lost the one person that really made me feel alive.Made me feel like there was a point to waking up in the morning.Let's call her CC.CC was very easily jealous over my female best friend R.I have a long history with R.R always seemed to support me emotionally and never really gave any inclination that she was romantically attracted to me.Further more,me and R were and still are physically close.Whilst dating CC I would hold hands with R which would clearly upset CC.And me,being the douche i am,never done anything about it.I continued treating CC like second place and never giving her the love she deserved.On a side note,me and R(my female best friend) never done anything except holding hands and hugging,I did most certainly not cheat on CC.Fast forward a couple months,and we would avoid each other and act as if we were almost strangers. Every time we accidentally came in contact with each other we both acted as if we were being branded with a hot rod of iron.This continued for a week until we had an argument over text.Both of us were being passive aggressive but i was obviously the one who started the whole argument.And then we decided to take a break from each other. For a week we still texted.Not much seemed to have changed except our texts seemed so much more wary and cautious.Then on top of that,DD lets call them that ,texted me saying i was being bordeline mentally abusive to CC and that i was manipulative in the relationship.DD was very close to my CC.Anyway lets leave all that out and skip to the juicy bits you all want to hear.2 weeks after our break,she stops texting me entirely.Stops talking to me and avoids me. Doesn't even make eye contact from me.Then on the day we would have had our 5 month anniversary,I see her with hickeys on her neck from DD.CC has stopped caring about me entirely that's for sure...I still think about her.I still love her.I start crying whenever i think back onto memories I have shared with her.How warm her embrace felt.How her hand felt against mine.How I just enjoyed being in her company,just lying down and staring at her in silence. Savouring ever second I got to spend time with her.I have to let go now.I'm finding it hard to.Her.Her.Her.It's a chant inside my head and my heart.I love her and I hate what it does to me.

New

March 25, 2016 @ (Anywhere)

Tags: #surviving

I was in an emotionally abusive relationship. I never was interested in dating until 9 months ago. I am 20 years old and I am young, but I fell in love. To me he was perfect until one day he wasn't. He told me I wasn't attractive enough for him, that I was stupid, a whore, worthless, etc. None of which is true. My friends were confused what I saw in him, and I will not try to sound conceited, but I knew I was much better looking. He made his own insecurities mine, to hide how he really felt. I was so depressed, I lost almost 15 bs. I was never big. I was 5'6" and went from 122 lbs to 106 lbs in three months. It was unhealthy. The first time we broke up I was devastated. I didn't eat or sleep, my anxiety was so bad it overtook my life. I was so desperate to make things right that I drove him further away. There was a point where I couldn't leave my bed and my roommates were genuinely concerned about me. A month later we got back together. It was beautiful. I was so happy and he said he loved me all the time. However 2 months later, it crashed again. I am OKAY. I am here to tell you it gets better. We broke up two days ago, I cried yesterday, but that's okay. I feel liberated. I realized that yes, we love each other, but we both are too immature to be together at this point. Sometimes when a relationship ends, you need to take a step back and really look at it. He holds grudges, he mentally abused me, he never made sacrifices for me, which made me resent him. I realized that sometimes love isn't enough. Sometimes you realize that no matter how desperate you are to make things work, they just don't. I know it's hard to accept, heck I am struggling too. If it is meant to be it will be. Maybe it's just not the right time, but I can tell you that once you hit rock bottom you can go nowhere else, but up. I was at rock bottom, I lived and someone I am okay. I haven't bombarded him with texts begging him to take me back or whine how it isn't fair. I simply said I wouldn't contact him unless he contacted me and he hasn't. I will not reach out again. My best advice to anyone going through what I survived, as much as it sucks and as much as you want to reach out and be with them, cut them off. Take a real look at your relationship. Do you want to go back to it? Is it worth it? If it is, than fight for it and if it works, that's amazing, if it doesn't at least you'll know you gave everything you had. I can promise you it isn't easy, but it does get better.

Deanna

March 16, 2016 @ (ny)

Tags: Broken Heart

Before I share my story just a quick history. I had a 3 year relationship in high school i fell out of love then I met Erik and i was head over heels for about 8 months little dod I know he had feelings for his ex and his best friend. Being paranoid about this i gave him an ultamaduim and he broke it off. After this I did not believe in love I thought he was the one then I met chris. I dont know why I loved him since he was mentally abusive but I did. He also broke up with me while this was happening I had met another guy but he was just a friend to help me. And here is where my break up story begins. At first we just hooked up weird for me because I have never been that type but I felt so safe and comfortable with him. Although I didnt trust him because of my other relationships so he broke up with me briefly then we got back together. We then moved in together and were together for a year and a half. I kept threatening to kick him out because he was misplacing money and other events. He got sick of it and broke up with me. I understood that what I did was painful to him but I just thought he would try to workout it out since we had spent so much time together and lived together. I just don't know where to go from here. After Erik i didn't believe in love then i met my last bf and starting believing again now im back to where i started.

Myfault

September 04, 2015 @ (Coachella Valley)

Tags: dumped

I met this girl through a weekly meeting that talked about mental illness. I saw her beautiful, delicate pale skin compliment her dark hair. She was with another guy who I thought was her boyfriend. I was instantly enticed by her looks. Her silence was soft and spoke with such force that it shook me off my feet. I felt nervous and she did not even flinch to look at me while I talked. Damn I did not have a car at the time so I had to take the bus home. I missed my stop all because I was fantasizing about me being with her. Then as I looked back at my stop I came to the realization that I would probably never get a chance to even hangout with her. I fell hard just by her looks and it was not that she was a ten it was just her. Yeah, she is beautiful but her face oh her face just captured me like the moon captures the moth. weeks passed and I did not see her because she was busy with college. luckily I befriended her friend who was actually just childhood friends. I liked him alot and thanks to knowing him I got a chance at getting closer to this girl. who's name I did not know until he told me. By pure luck I got a chance to finally be alone with her and as I spoke I began to see that she looked at me differently. As she spoke i only fell deeper and deeper into her sweet eyes. we stayed up all night in th back of her car and i thought that maye I did have a chance. And I did. we fell in love but it woudnt last. She would break up with me for trivial reasons. later on I figured out she was insecure. New years eve we had a huge fight,I fel unappreciated and I finally put an end to it. She came back that same night which wass surprising because it was always me who had to but I was not. She said she would change because she actually loved me and she had never felt that way. Change she did some how she became even more perfect but I messed it up. still hurt from the past I treated her bad and I began to think I no longer needed her. I was a bad boyfriend for 6 months and she finally left. She no longer cared for me. And it is true that you only miss them once you let them go. I realized my mistakes and I tried for three months I was exasperated and exhausted but I kept trying. She was hurt. She did not trust me. I know I messed up and she has every right to leave. I would give her all the time in the world and I would still be here waiting for her. this was the first week of fall semester in college. it fees so different. today was the day I finally let go and I am so hurt I cant go to sleep Im crying and I dont know why. I hve been through some messed up shit in my life but even that did not cause me to cry. I cry because she is truly amazing and actually wanted me but I broke her. I have one last plan. I am finally going to give her space. I will work on myself and do my best to try and get a date with her. Sadly she is moving to either New york or san fransico in a year. I may never have another chance, sadly she said she would stay here with me until I finished with college. She is the type of girl to get over guys quick. she told me she would be over me in a week. Sadly I would be with her right now if in those 6 months I would tell her to leave me alone I Instead apologized and told her how much she meant to me.

Jen

May 30, 2015 @ (US)

Tags: Bad break up Sad Break up

Moving to a new school, I didn't know anyone except for a few people. At first I was being bullied for being different, (And for being the new kid). Fast forward. It was the last class of the day and I saw a guy. Let's call him.. Kevin. Well, I thought he was cute and so for a few weeks we started chatting online. Then he finally asked me out. I was so happy, but everyone told me that he was a liar, a cheater, etc. I didn't listen (Because 'liking someone a lot' makes people stupid)
We had a lot of things in common. We had never-ending conversations, I thought we were the perfect couple.
Just then, the 2nd week we were dating, he tells me the news that his mom found out about our relationship.
He told me that his mom was forcing him to break up with me.
I cried... for what seemed like days, even had mental breakdowns in class..
Then I just think,
"Why didn't he fight for me? We could still be together when we're at school. Please don't tell me this is real."
FAST FORWARD even more...
I found out that he lied, he lied about everything. And I finally realized, he was a lying cheating motherfluffer.
Few days later, he dates my friend.
Broke up with her.
Dates my other friend.
We don't talk, to this day.
( He still attempted to flirt with me after we broke up BTW )
Kevin is lame. -.-

Anibrokenheart

January 01, 2015 @ (kolkata,India)

Tags: bad breakup

I was in a relationship with a girl for last 6 years.I still remember the day when i first saw her in our chemistry class.she was the most beautiful girl i had ever seen.i felt in love with her at first sight.I became friend of her in few days.after one month i proposed her.one week later she said yes to me..i still remember the first kiss of her..i was the first boy in our class.she is not good at study.i started teach her at her home..as time goes we came closer to each other mentally,emotionally,physically like a married relation.16 hours we were connected to each other..i made her pass in her exam sacrificing mine(how i cant elaborate now).my 12th marks dropped down to 82% from 95.I got chance in Indian institute of technology(IIT) but i sacrificed that just to stay with her.but i managed to get chance in best state university.so we were again together..things were going smooth.but there were some ups and down which is not very fatal..in the meantime we were about to have a baby but as we were not married i have to abort our baby.;-(.
she was doing her b.com and after finishing her degree she got a job through her sister's husband's contact in a MNC (deloitte).but my degree was not finished as it is 4 year long.In my final year i became very busy for my career,for my business n all.i was not giving her time.but i was not flirting with other girls.things become tougher.I was unable to get a job and got frustrated.In the mean time i noticed sudden change in her behavior.one day i checked her fb inbox.and then...how can i tell you i found her chatting with one of her office colleague in suspicious manner.i caught her.but till now she is denying this fact.she give me breakup recently.blocked me everywhere.
I cant forget her.i love her still..I tried to forget her.took pills,marijuana,drugs every day.but still find no peace..i feel like destroying myself.1 month passed.today is her birthday.i miss her,.friends i cannot tell you how much pain inside me.i miss her.i love her.
you know she used to tell me while keeping her head on my chest "this is the most beautiful and peaceful place in this world" so how can she forget all these..i love you dear.but i have to forget you

Carmen

May 29, 2014 @ (United States)

Tags: break-up, annoying, bad person

We were juniors in college when we finally started dating. We'd been friends for a few months and had attended some social functions on campus together. Unfortunately for him, Tom had a terrible reputation on campus, not for being a player or anything, but for being a terrible person in general. My friends constantly reinforced this information before I agreed to date him exclusively. I questioned him about the various rumors regarding him and his only answers involved: "I don't remember," or "That's all in the past." I was extremely skeptical that anyone could change that fast (we'd only been in school for a couple of years!) but I wanted to see who he was for myself so I agreed to go out with him. The next six months were filled with depression and anger for me for a lot for a lot of reasons. For one thing, he would talk about problems we were having with a mutual female friend rather than talking to me about them. I didn't know I was in a threesome! He was a terrible communicator in general. When talking to his friends or an audience, he would be charming, but when talking to my friends or meeting my family, he was incredibly awkward. It wouldn't have bothered me as much if he were shy, but he was able to hold perfect conversations with complete strangers. On top of all this, I witnessed him lying to other people's faces, including his friends and family. Because of this, I knew for sure that he could not be trusted. Around the three-month mark, we exchanged "I love you's" and around that time, the little affection he was showing me was slowly wearing down. He never complimented me much anyway (except when we were making out), but those just stopped. Our time together was mainly spent making out once a week in his dorm even though I insisted that we should spend time talking and bonding in other ways. I guess he thought that because I was in love with him I was going to tolerate that. And I did for another two months before telling him that I'd been feeling neglected and that he wasn't keeping up his end of the compromise (He told me he'd be more open emotionally if I agreed to make out with him more). He told me it was hard and that that was the way he'd always been. No effort. No anything. He was the first person I'd done ANYTHING physical with and that was hard for me, but I was willing to try and compromise. He didn't try at all. During month six, I dumped him while we were on a walk. He was shocked. I did cry the weekend afterward, but I quickly realized how much happier I was without him in my life. I couldn't believe how being involved with him could make me feel so lonely and depressed. I've been single for a month now and while it sucks sometimes, I know I'm mentally in a better place now. I learned that it's better to be alone than with the wrong person.

Jenna

May 24, 2014 @ (Georgia)

Tags: Bad breakup, cheating, karma, psycho ex

So I was with a guy for about a year and a half. The first three months of the relationship he cheated on me. But me being the dumbass that I was, I took him back after he left the other girl. He proposed and gave me a ring.. so I said yes. We were just engaged, not married. Anyways we were fine for a while, but then I started to see a different side of him. He told me he had a mental disorder called ODD.. if you don't know what it is, look it up! Anyways, every time we got in an argument, he would cuss me out and literally beat himself up. The arguments weren't happening often, only every once in a while until we got to the one year mark. When we made it to the one year mark, the arguments were constant. He tried to ruin my graduation night and that was the last straw.. he told me he wanted a break and I don't do breaks, I do break ups. Not even a few hours after the break up, he adds an ex on Facebook, who he always used to talk shit about. Funny. So I messaged her when I found out he was going to see her, the stupid bitch had the nerve to tell me he was hers first and that it wasn't her fault I ran him off and he went back to her. I was livid, and once she told me they had been talking for a while, I was done. We broke up on a Wednesday, and he was already hanging out with her on a Friday. He always used to tell me he couldn't imagine living without me and that he loved me so much. It was all bullshit. I hate him now. Literally, I would much rather have never been with his psycho ass. I hope what he did comes back to bite him in the ass.

Varun

January 23, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: Selfish

Once which was the truth for us ,prooved to be just a dream and a requirement for the moment. Love was treated as a step of going up by her. I held strong for around 3 years but i could not take the disrespect of me and my life. Once a Icon in her life is now just a piece of shit. This was told to me by all my close ones. I was taken apart from my family, my friends. I just cant take it more. I am not a fake person, all i am is a guy who thinks this world needs more love and having said that i was in a relation with the person with the exact opposite. though. Today after a lot of mental trauma i end this relation from my end,for i know she will be fine now . I am not surprised that there is not any resentment from her today and she is fine for me to be not around. Last Statement" I was always unhappy with u for the time you and i have been together"

Ash

December 20, 2011 @ (India)

Tags: My story

Hi all, at last found a site where i can spill my feelings. It all stated 8 years back. My neighbour boy (who calls me big bro) was my very good friend since childhood. He is 4 years younger to me and was doing BDS (bachelor in Dental Surgery). He had a senior girl in the college whom he respected as a elder sister. In many conversations he used to cite her examples. I became influenced towards this girl and asked him to give me her mobile number. Upon a promise that i wont play with the girls feelings, he gave me the number. After many attempts to make the girl talk to a stranger, she finally felt comfortable talking to me. Our relationship grew on phone and though we hadn't seen each other, the inter bond kept growing. Then one fine day, we decided to meet. On the first look, it was love at first site for both of us. Whenever she had to go her college in the other distant city, i used to drop her to the next city bus stand. Shopping together, going into malls..... all was like a dream. Then after 3 years, i asked her to ask her parents for marriage as i was very keen to get married to her and so she was. She belonged to a hindu brahmin family which had a staunch belief in astrology. When her parents asked my birth details, i gave them my true details. Although i knew our horoscopes don't match, still i wanted to marry her on truth and not on a bed of lies. Her father told me that since she was a manglik (an astrological condition) and i was not she could be married to a manglik boy only. We both tried to convince them for 2 long years but they didnt agreed. Although i am well educated and placed at a high position in an MNC, they said a straight "NO" to me. She even tried suicide thrice to convince them but they didnt agreed. After that, she started avoiding my calls. As our relation was entering its seventh year, my family told me that they can'nt wait any longer and my mother being hyper tensive, wanted the things to be settled at this end or the other. Finally, we went to see her father to convince him about my love but a straight NO was his answer. I was heartbroken as the girl stopped picking up my calls. I went through a three month anti depression course. Then my family finalised some other girl for me and got me married. After two years of marriage and a son, my ex again came in contact with me. She is still single, has crossed 30 years of age and is repenting on her decision to go as per her parents decision. She says that she always loved me and avoided my phone calls just to make me hate her and to make me move on with my life. Although i have got a loving wife but the place which i had given to my ex, i wont be able to give it to anyone. I am trying to pull on with life without my wife knowing it but it is like getting born and dying every day. Now my ex's parents are searching for a boy but for her too it will be just another compromise that she will be making. How people shatter lives of lovers in India just on the pretext that the astrological horoscopes dont match is a lifelong nightmare for lovers. Neither the children nor the parents nor the ones to whom they get married ever stay happy just because of this sick mentality of horoscope matching. Life is hell without the one whom you love so deeply, whom you have visualised and imagined in each and every moment in your coming life, in all your future times. Life is truly a hell.