Myfault's Breakup Story in Coachella Valley

Myfault

September 04, 2015 @ (Coachella Valley)

Tags: dumped

I met this girl through a weekly meeting that talked about mental illness. I saw her beautiful, delicate pale skin compliment her dark hair. She was with another guy who I thought was her boyfriend. I was instantly enticed by her looks. Her silence was soft and spoke with such force that it shook me off my feet. I felt nervous and she did not even flinch to look at me while I talked. Damn I did not have a car at the time so I had to take the bus home. I missed my stop all because I was fantasizing about me being with her. Then as I looked back at my stop I came to the realization that I would probably never get a chance to even hangout with her. I fell hard just by her looks and it was not that she was a ten it was just her. Yeah, she is beautiful but her face oh her face just captured me like the moon captures the moth. weeks passed and I did not see her because she was busy with college. luckily I befriended her friend who was actually just childhood friends. I liked him alot and thanks to knowing him I got a chance at getting closer to this girl. who's name I did not know until he told me. By pure luck I got a chance to finally be alone with her and as I spoke I began to see that she looked at me differently. As she spoke i only fell deeper and deeper into her sweet eyes. we stayed up all night in th back of her car and i thought that maye I did have a chance. And I did. we fell in love but it woudnt last. She would break up with me for trivial reasons. later on I figured out she was insecure. New years eve we had a huge fight,I fel unappreciated and I finally put an end to it. She came back that same night which wass surprising because it was always me who had to but I was not. She said she would change because she actually loved me and she had never felt that way. Change she did some how she became even more perfect but I messed it up. still hurt from the past I treated her bad and I began to think I no longer needed her. I was a bad boyfriend for 6 months and she finally left. She no longer cared for me. And it is true that you only miss them once you let them go. I realized my mistakes and I tried for three months I was exasperated and exhausted but I kept trying. She was hurt. She did not trust me. I know I messed up and she has every right to leave. I would give her all the time in the world and I would still be here waiting for her. this was the first week of fall semester in college. it fees so different. today was the day I finally let go and I am so hurt I cant go to sleep Im crying and I dont know why. I hve been through some messed up shit in my life but even that did not cause me to cry. I cry because she is truly amazing and actually wanted me but I broke her. I have one last plan. I am finally going to give her space. I will work on myself and do my best to try and get a date with her. Sadly she is moving to either New york or san fransico in a year. I may never have another chance, sadly she said she would stay here with me until I finished with college. She is the type of girl to get over guys quick. she told me she would be over me in a week. Sadly I would be with her right now if in those 6 months I would tell her to leave me alone I Instead apologized and told her how much she meant to me.