Searching for "selfish"


23 Results For 'selfish'

Edna

April 16, 2024 @ (California)

Tags: Breakup, long relationship


We have yet to break up. Its hard but I decided to do it.. I'm just mentally and emotionally getting ready to do it...11 years down the drain because he doesn't know if he wants to be with me or not. I'm the dumb one for staying all this time and being delusional year after year waiting on him to propose. But nope. He doesn't want that. He doesn't even want to move in together... says he's not ready. See, my clock is ticking. I'm 35 now and I want a family. Yeah I should have probably left him after the 5 year mark. Maybe then I would have met the love of my life. Maybe I would already be a mom. Life is hard. I never imagined my life without him. I get so much anxiety thinking about the break up but it has to be done. I feel I won't be able to live without him but I gotta be selfish. I have to think about my future and find someone who is willing to wife me up.


       

Jay Jay

November 30, 2016 @ (Toronto)

Tags: Bad break up


Okay so I had been dating this guy for 2 years and I was madly in love with him. He was a lover and best friend which can be hard to find most time in a relationship. We argued a lot and there were many times when he made me feel like I wasn't good enough for him in our relationship. We lived together for about 1 year. There were things about him that I absolutely love but I knew he could be a selfish person. Anyways toward the end of our relationship. He said he wanted to move out to be closer to school which was already an hour drive for him. At this time we were arguing a lot. I thought this would be good for us because we need a bit of space. A couple week of him moving out he was telling me. Stuff like he feel like he is single and has been telling people he was single. But we still hadn't broken up. We decide to take a break and work things out. A week later we got in a huge argument. Then I found out four days later over Facebook he has a new girlfriend. I was like ouch I guess it's official. But he keep play mind games and telling me he still love me and we can work. Untill one day I showed up at his house while his new girlfriend was there and confronted him about he said in front of her that we had been over for months and he want to leave 6 months ago. Since then I have been trying to break all ties but it can be hard sometimes


       

Mian

November 13, 2016 @ (Malaysia)

Tags: Bad breakup


English is not my first language so I hope you guys can overlook my errors. I honestly don't know where to start hahah. In my case, I was the one who screwed up. I screwed up BIG time. It's a little bit more complicated than that tho.. This girl, Dina is her name, she used to have a very serious ex issues when we were dating.. I guess you could say that i was her rebound.. Her ex did all sorts of horrible things to her as he was abusive asf. But Dina dated with that guy for like 4 years so she found it hard to move on and really get over him.. When we were still together, she'd still text her ex and they would fight over the phone and i'd just stand there doing nothing as i respect her decisions..I kept pushing her to just ignore that guy(in a good way) but Dina still have feelings for that son of a bitch and that she couldnt hurt him.. and she said she can handle it.. so i let 'her way of doing things' proceed only until i realized that she's developing some deep feelings of affection again towards her ex..when i wanted to take actions, she yelled at me.. we never yell at each other before...at that point i knew it was already too late for me.. so i decided to send an offensive text to her ex and i did.. he got mad.. at Dina.. and Dina got mad at me.. which i deemed to be very unfair.. so me and Dina had a huge fight and we broke up by hating each other.. Soon after that i realized i have made a huge mistake.. the biggest mistake of my life.. i have lost the love of my life becase of my own ego and selfishness.. I mean, its not her fault to begin with.. her ex started it.. and Dina is just another weak and innocent girl.. she just wanted to help everyone.. i apologized to her.. MANY TIMES.. send her texts..letters.. but she wont return any of em.. and her bestfriend told me that she hates me so much right now.. the unfairness is real..


       

Laura

May 31, 2016 @ (Everywhere)

Tags: Bad breakup


We met exactly a year ago, everything was perfect he was everything I've ever wanted, I fell in love with him instantly, we were both passionate about each other, I mean after our 2d date we were inseparable, we were practically living together, I trusted him completely so I told him all my secrets little did I know he would use it against me on every fight, he was bothered by the fact that I dated people before him and he was comparing me to him the whole time (he only dated 3 girls his entire life) he used to blame me for my past even though I was still a virgin when I met him he used to even blame me for kissing a lot of people before him (FYI he's 30 years old and I'm 25 ) he used to make me feel like a hore, he was very charming so when he apologizes and sweet talk to me I used easily forgive him.
I was spending all my time with him so my friendships faded with time, I even stood against my family at one point for him, 7months after we met he asked me to marry him and he even got me the perfect ring that I wanted and it was great and perfect, until he gets mad and he turns into this cruel careless person, by that time I don't even recognize him anymore he never physically hurt me, but he broke wine bottles and glass and all he could see, I tried explaining that that's wrong of him I tried talking to him, I tried doing the same but he didn't change a thing it even got worse,
I remember once I was too tired to have sex he got so mad and he was acting so bad when I told him how he was acting he just took my things and threw them to the door and kicked me out, he used to blame me for looking at my phone when I'm with him (and I mean just checking notifications ) he used to give me hell if I took a selfie calling me selfish and I love myself too much but I'm not doing anything a normal 25 year old women doesn't.
I took him on a trip for his birthday and he picked up a fight on the that day just to keep blaming me for ruining his birthday.
When we fight he just completely ignores me or call me a bitch or just keeps insulting me and when I fight back he goes mad and he blames me for it, he manipulated me so many time and hurt me just so he can feel better he used to make up stories just to see if I'm jealous I tried my best to be patient telling myself he will change, he will grow up, he will understand how much I actually love him but he keeps forbidding me not to even go out with male colleagues while he can go out with female colleagues all he wants so that was it I broke up with him and the scary part is I have no one to talk to abt this even the one only friend I have left Is so tired of me complaining about him I don't know where to start I don't even leave the bed


       

Rob

May 06, 2015 @ (Bay Area California)

Tags: Confused, wealth


I found a woman I wanted to marry I proposed. Everything was good, I was doing well in my career and got a promotion and I was excited to start a family and I recently purchased a nice condo.

I had immense self esteem issues throughout the engagement and dating. I had it ingrained in my mind that you need financial worth to be loved. I used pervious relationships as proof that I needed to be wealthy in order to be loved. I constantly assumed the relationship wouldn't work out and I would be abandoned for lack of wealth or cheated on. I walked around assuming people thought it was the "first" relationship I had due to my technology career.

It got to a point where I assumed I was being used for money (never knew exactly if it was true). She wanted me to buy a bigger home and fork out a lot for a wedding. It might of been her dream to have those things, but I didn't take it that way. It's like I subconsciously waited for an excuse to end the relationship. Instead of trying to work through it, I abandoned the relationship and out of the blue gave up on it. I was loved by her and her family and probably hurt everyone. It was the most rude, insecure, selfish thing I could of possibly did. I just gave up on a future, family, and love because of my insecurities and lack of maturity.

It was a Saturday and I called her and told her she didn't love me and that she loved money and to forget everything. It was the last time I ever spoke to her. Now that I look back on it, I am ashamed. I assumed she didn't love me and told her this, she refused and said she did. I told her to meet someone else that was financially wealthy enough and said to her that she would not see my ugly face again.

It's true you need to love yourself before you love another person as cliche as it sounds. Like if you don't value yourself, how do you expect someone else will. And the other "don't care what others think" is true. You can't go through life basing a relationship on what an outside force will think or assume.

If I could go back I would of handled myself very different and waited until I had my self esteem and confidence intact which I still lack.


       

Bubby

April 10, 2015 @ (vijayawada)

Tags: Love, break-up, back together.


Most people who have broken up with their partners, have tried to get back together. Whether from fear, whether from frustration of meeting someone new, I cannot say.
I have broken up with women and after some time - a week, a month - we have tried again. It’s funny how we always tell ourselves: "I will not do it again." We promise a lot of things, but there always comes a time that the old problems, in most cases unresolved or misunderstood, emerge again.
A person comes in the life of another in order to learn from one another. The breakups happen in order to teach the partners something. If "the beloved ones" do not pay attention to this life lesson, they will surely make exactly the same mistakes in the next relationships. The most common problem, I think, is that people wear a mask. You liked the external first and then looked inside the shell. Fallen in love. But to keep the attention of your loved one you’ve been doing things that in some cases, they did not like. You wear a mask, just to prove yourself you are good enough for them.
So the two lovers begin to live life together in a lie.
From my experience I would say that in a relationship, including my own, one of the partners loves the other one more. One always feels ignored by the other. You are going restaurants, theaters, film screenings, etc.., which you do not want to, but you do just to please your partner. It happens so that there comes a point where you forget who you are. You no longer go out with your friends, stay away from things that you’ve previously enjoyed and activities which made you say things like: "No one can make me stop playing on Saturdays..!"
But why does it happen so? Most likely you've been so in love with the person next to you that you were ready to do everything for him.
So you’ve got that person in your life. You’ve achieved your target by wearing the fake mask. Now what? Time passes and you start to thing you’ve made some wrong decisions. Now your friends do not call. You are deadlock. And you wonder how it came to here.
Even your mates can feel that things are wrong. You argue and quarrel very often but both don’t have the courage to admit what the real problem is. Namely, both have forgotten who you are. In order not to quarrel for "trifles", you put aside your interests to try make your relationship better. Now, you both stay at home, doing some nasty things, monotonous, you do not feel but only satisfy your needs.
And there comes a point where you say: "I cannot go on like this!”. You split with mixed feelings, without even thinking. No longer want to see the other person and you say that true love is there only in the movies. You close yourself to others.
But a month passes and you begin to feel the need to satisfy "needs." You start meeting with different people. You say to yourself, "Life is life!" Clubs, bars, restaurants, cool promiscuity. You feel the euphoria and cannot stop. The effect wears off quickly...
You meet new girl in the college or in the streets. She is the personification of everything you dreamed of. And fall in love… And history repeats itself...!
MY ADVICE..!
Stop thinking so much! Be yourself! As much as you like a person, above all love yourself! No, do not be selfish, but do not forget yourself. If a person does not feel happy inside, he cannot be really happy. If people could be paused in their hectic life for a moment and asked what they really love to do, to follow and achieve their childhood dreams, the world would be a wonderful place. Be the Change...!!!


       

Varun

January 23, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: Selfish


Once which was the truth for us ,prooved to be just a dream and a requirement for the moment. Love was treated as a step of going up by her. I held strong for around 3 years but i could not take the disrespect of me and my life. Once a Icon in her life is now just a piece of shit. This was told to me by all my close ones. I was taken apart from my family, my friends. I just cant take it more. I am not a fake person, all i am is a guy who thinks this world needs more love and having said that i was in a relation with the person with the exact opposite. though. Today after a lot of mental trauma i end this relation from my end,for i know she will be fine now . I am not surprised that there is not any resentment from her today and she is fine for me to be not around. Last Statement" I was always unhappy with u for the time you and i have been together"


       

Sweetie

March 31, 2013 @ (Kansas)

Tags: Breakup


I was the one who made the decision to break up. I did it out of anger and I believe what I did was just. He was rude, disappeared for a week, treated me like a doormat, broke promises, lied & cheated.

Regardless of how bad he was, he was my first real relationship. I guess this is the reason why I still think about him. People say, first love is always the hardest to get over. I believe that now. It really is the hardest.

People often say that it's often easier for the dumper, but in my case. It's not. When I ended the relationship, I gave him my side of the story, how he made me felt & how hurt I was about the way he treated me. He just argued and turned the blame on me. He implied that I was immature & selfish for wanting to break up & we ended it.

The break up was hard for me because even though it was my choice it was not one that I wanted. What he did to me broke a promise that he once made. I had to leave him to stand up for myself. It was hard because I was still in love with him. I think I still am a little bit.

But nonetheless its over now and I can positively say that I'm confident that I will meet and find someone who will treat me a lot better than he ever did. Because even though I loved him the most out of every man I've ever dated. He was the worst boyfriend I've ever had!





       

Breakfastclub

February 27, 2013 @ (Kansas)

Tags: exbf, manipulator, liar, selfish


My ex boyfriend and I broke up about 2 and a half years ago, but all this time we never stopped talking. We remained in a sexual relationship all this time. During this time he treated me poorly, then we would fight and then he would treat me better... until the next fight. He always knew what to say and how to act to calm me down and convince that he cared for me. During this time he talked to 3 other girls, and in all the occasions I told him I didn't want to talk to him anymore, but he would insist in staying in my life. We had a bad fight in all three occasions and then once things started not working out with the girl he would apologize saying he recognized he didn't treat me well. I have asked him several times to stay away, to let me go, and he would for a couple of weeks but then he would come back and I was enough of an idiot to let him back in. Well in December I told him we should stop seeing each other, then he said "ok" but soon started messaging me saying he wanted to see me once I got home from Christmas break. Then we hung out a couple of times in January, but then he started being really rude to me so I told him to not talk to me anymore. We hadn't talked to me in a while and then I (was being stupid again) texted him saying I was ok with us not talking but I wanted to understand why. Then he replied "get over me, i'm talking to a girl in high school" (detail: we are both 22 and college students). I laughed because that's just pathetic. Well the next week I saw him at a dance at our college, and I was a little tipsy and in a bad mood and angry at him so I walked by him and pumped into him. He texted me all angry, but then the next morning he was being all sweet saying I look beautiful at the dance and that he wanted to see me. So I said "what about your high schooler?" then he replied "Oh I lied, I just said that to piss you off". I knew he was lying about that, I know he actually talked to her and I knew she had probably dumped him already. Well,I didn't let him come over to my apartment. I didn't want to see him at all. Then I realized on his twitter that he was talking to her again so I asked him "why did you lie about not talking to her?" then he answered "i don't have to explain anything to you" (wow, dick). Well after that we talked a couple more times and then I noticed there was nothing wrong because of some things he posted on twitter. Then we were talking and he said someone screwed things up. Well it was obviously her. Then a few days later I drove by his house (which is right across from my apartment) and I saw a car there, so I asked if it was hers and he said yes. Well I got pissed out and said terrible things to him. We argued bad, I told him he was nothing to me, and I regretted having let him in back in my life so many times, he got really mad when I said that and then he told me he didn't want to talk to me anymore. Then the next day we argued again and this time he told me "shut up, don't talk to me, don't talk about me, and don't talk about her". I know I screwed up in a few aspects, but in no way I'm blaming myself for what did. He lied to me several times, and he manipulated me to get just what he wanted. He is the most selfish and egocentric person I have ever met. All he thinks is about himself. Now that he is happy with her there is no way in hell that he will apologize for the mean things he said to me. What I heard is that she is a little high school slut, so I guess she is a good fit for him. I know I deserved some of it, but he was never considering towards my feelings. We were still kinda up in the air, and he knew I had feelings for him, and he didn't understand when I tried to explain why I was mad/upset. He pretty much said "this is your problem, not mine, deal with it". This last couple of weeks have been tough, but I will not let him bring me down. I am starting to see that I didn't lose anything, I actually won, because I got rid of an abusive, manipulative boy and now I am free to find a man, who can care for me and be what my ex could never be.


       

Nan El

January 01, 2013 @ (New York)

Tags: Cheating with co-worker, 3 years of lies


Over three years ago I started dating a man that was selfish, a cheater, a liar and just plain self centered. He admitted this to me. I was hesitant at first but it didn't take long for him to have me believing that he wanted to be a better man for me. We worked together for years and once he transferred to another department, that's when we started dating. He asked me to marry him after just a few months and treated me as if I was the only woman on earth. We spent constant time together and he would look me in the eyes everyday and tell me how much he loves and adores me and wants to be with only me the rest of his life. I introduced him to my kids and he moved in with us shortly thereafter. He lived with us for one year and during that time he started drifting, working more...going out longer with his friends. He started telling me he was having a hard time living with kids (who I only have half the week) and he only saw them maybe twice a week. He told me he couldn't live with us anymore and it just wasn't "him". The day after he moved out he was begging for me back and this went on and off for a year and a half. We broke up last December of 2011 because he couldn't handle things...all while still claiming to love me and not want anyone else. For about 6 weeks we went back and forth about our love for each other then he said he needs me and promises to be the man II need. I took him back and we were together up until October of this past year 2012....still back and forth with his feelings...but kept promising to marry me and move back in. I broke up with him in October when he told me he couldn't take vacation to Disney World with me and the kids which was planned and paid for and was happening in 3 weeks!! He continued to text and call me crying that he needs me, etc... But his gram was sick and he didn't want to go anywhere. He made me feel guilty for taking vacation without him! When I returned right after Thanksgiving, I started finding out some things from people and emails, etc.. He started sleeping with one of my employees last year when we broke up...she works very closely with me. They broke up when he got back together with me...but then he contacted her to "get together" in April, May and November. We went to a concert together in June and they acted like they didn't even know each other then went to get beer for 20 minutes together! At that point I had no reason to think anything of it. Once I confronted both of them, they denied even knowing each other and called me crazy. She ultimately confessed but they are both still claiming it wasn't all year long. She has had boyfriends this whole time as well. I am now in a situation where they both still work for the company and she still reports to me. They act as if nothing is wrong and life is good....they show no remorse. By the way, she is 12 years younger than him! I have so much pain and it is in my face everyday. How do I get over it?