Searching for "guilty"


20 Results For 'guilty'

Jill

March 22, 2022 @ (US)

Tags: sad break up, sad, death


My fiance was 11 years older than me. About six months before the wedding was planned he was diagnosed with testicular cancer. All he was going to need was a surgery to remove one testicle and six rounds of chemo. Unfortunately both testicle were removed by mistake. It was absolutely devastating. I broke off the engagement a few weeks later. He was heart broken but understood why. Sadly the cancer spread and ended up passing away after Thanksgiving last year. He left his house and money to me. I feel so guilty because remained so generous and kind to me.


       

Tyrion

September 23, 2017 @ (Sky)

Tags: Hard breakup


Im 23, I met my ex at a running club when she was 16 and I asked her out, it all worked perfectly and we fell in love quickly. Our relationship was PERFECT, we both loved eachother and had a great time everytime we were together. We were made for eachother, and I really mean it, im not saying that because everyone says it. It was all really good.

For the record, we both new she was going abroad for her college studies, and we were willing to have a long distance relationship.

Sometimes she used to tell me that she was the only one contributing to the relationship, saying that only she wanted to see me and that I was indiferent when we dont meet. The truth is that it might be true, I was busy with college and in my free time I also liked to play video games, but we still saw eachother A LOT. I told her it was not true, every time I could I would go see her and that I love her with all my heart.

Time passed, and it was all still extremely good, but after 1 year and 8 months, she was 18 and done with school, while I am still finishing my last college year. We spent my summer vacations together, all the time, and when they were over, things changed, she had all that FREE TIME while I was extremely busy, that is when things fell appart really. I could not see her for 2 weekends straight, due to my overwhelming homework and also playing some video games; she basically transformed, and when I asked her what was happening, she said that she was getting used to not see me. I imediatelly went to see her and talk, but she was another girl, indiferent, not caring anymore. I told her that I will change and I will literaly sleep less so I can se her more. She said ok, but she was already diferent, nothing I did actually changed her mind. It was really messed up, so we sat down and talked, and she said that she had to change, she was suffering because she put a lot of effort into us and she left herself behind. This was true, she gave me all these little creative presents all the time, and I did not. She told me that the only way she could feel good is by caring less; I told her I was already putting more time into her, but she said that it was not the same, and that she thinks that the relationship is ending; nevetheless, we agreed to try to make it better. I really put an effort into everything, bringing her flowers, spending weekdays with her, and more, but after 2 weeks of this, she told me we need to talk, and broke up with me, saying we will be better off alone, she said she needed this time for herself before she went off the country. But she made her discontent clear, she told me that part of the breakup is due to her always giving me those little details, and that I never cared to give her the same, I did gave her some, but with time, I stopped.

The thing is that we broke up, and I am dying, feeling guilty as I gave her for granted and I lost her. She looks fine, I was crying really bad and she just shed a few tears. She said that maybe in the future we will meet, and she made it clear that she dreams of being my wife and having my kids, that im the perfect guy, but she wants to be alone.

I am confused and dont know what to do. I am shocked, I still think its not reall, I cant believe she broke up with me, SHE LOVED ME so much, and I did to. It all just happened in a second. Help me please.




       

Ivy

October 08, 2016 @ (India)

Tags: Sad, Guilty, Bad, Break up, His Once Baby


He was my 1 year senior friend. That night he said he liked me. Idk if I had feelings for him or not. But my best friend said that he's a really good guy and that I should approve his proposal. And yes, I did. But as I said I didn't know that if I had feelings for him that's why I didn't say romantic words as I know it's not good being superficial. But after 3 months I confessed that I truly loved him Yeah he waited those 3 months for me. All went quite good the next 3 months. I was his Baby/Babe/Bae/Love. He loved me a lot. But then something happened and he wanted to break up. I didn't want to force him so I agreed. But the next day he said that he can't leave me and again I agreed. Actually we never met face to face properly. After a few weeks after final exams he stopped talking to me but I called him and everything was back to normal. The next month he went thousand miles away from me to another state. He had asked me to call him everyday before he went. But after he went there he didn't text properly. Talked weird and like he didn't want to talk. As a result I didn't call or text him. After 3 months he texted me that he was missing me. Even I did so. That's why I accepted him. But nothing was normal. I felt awkward an all stuff. We had a fight. He did apologize but I was not cool at all. I replied rudely. So he said "let's break up". I replied Affirmative. But then I realized I can't do without him. I texted a long message with an I love you at the end. He said he was confused and that he would reply After Some days as his exams were approaching. Today he texted that he didn't know what I feel but wanted to be out of this totally. I agreed but bashed at him. Bombarded him with rude words and at last congratulated for his new girl. He thanked me. I thanked him For teaching me that all guys are the Same. He said "mention not'. And blocked me on all social networks.
That's how it all ended.
I wanna get over him now. But I feel bad that I talked that rudely.


       

Lolita

February 09, 2016 @ (india)

Tags: breakup is good


I have known him from 8th class. He was the most flirtatious boy in my school.He was always behind my friend. I just hated him that time. We were in different classes until 10. Then for three years we were classmates. In plus one we both were absent for biology test paper.I was ill and he was lazy. However next day teacher prepared a new question paper. Only two of us were in the classroom. That was the first time he noticed me and asked me to show the answers. But i didn't help him. Because i just hated him.But after that we started talking and towards the end of school life we became best friends. He always flirted with other girls but was a genuine friend to me which sparked my soul. After school we joined different colleges.I felt very lonely those days and i don't had any phone for communication. After one year i was the one who proposed him. To my surprise he said he too feel the same for me. I was in cloud nine. Only communication was through messages. So yes somehow it was a long distance relation. We were from different religion which is a big problem in India even now. So we had a doubt about our future. Anyhow i loved him wholeheartedly. I thought he too loves me badly. But then i heard the gossip. I have a best friend from school other than my lover. he told me that my lover is having an affair with another girl. I didn't took it seriously then. But slowly i found he is not talking to me much. Then one day he told me that he loves someone else. How do you feel when you hear something like this from the one whom you love most? Yes it was terrible. It broke my heart and soul. I was numb for almost one year. Nothing was okay. It was my final year in college and i got very low marks.I never hid anything from my parents. I was afraid to face them. I was feeling very guilty. I was not okay until my post graduation. After that i gave myself a reality check. In between this i forgot about my family,my dreams and myself. It's been four years after breakup. I changed myself completely. I have lot of dreams to achieve. I am on a chasing mode now. My wrong and right decisions made myself complete. Now i don't fell any guilt or something anymore. But after that i never fallen in love. Even an infatuation scare the hell out of me. I am happy as single. I have a word for those broken hearts out there. Let him or her go. Tomorrow is always a new day. These moments will never come back. Be happy and always stay with your family.
Thanks for reading (i'm little bit weak in English.Sorry for that)


       

Keijo

March 31, 2015 @ (Estonia)

Tags: Horrible break-up, devastated


I met my love of my life about 5-6 years ago but didn't know that back then. We used to chat a lot but somehow this chatting faded. About a year ago we started talking to each other again. For a while it was a normal, everyday friends talk but at one moment I felt that she was the one who was meant for me and I said I had feelings for her. She was kind of shocked but I believe in a good way. This truly was the best feeling in my 19 years. So, eventually we were together and everyday I fell deeper in love. This feeling was undescribable. I genuinely was the happiest man on earth. Everything was great and we were happy. But since we were living quite far from each other things started going not so well. We argued about pointless things, both being extremely stubborn. About 6 months our relationship had ups and downs but it really didn't matter because she was still my little princess and i loved her even more. About 3 weeks ago, we had a horrific quarrel which ended with me saying that she was disgusting. It was said because of the emotion that i had at that time. I had never felt so bad in my life. Honestly, i wanted to kill myself because of that saying. After that she obviously was angry and disappointed in me and she had all the reasons in the world to be mad at me because, after all i was a complete jerk. So i apologized about 100 times. A bit later i thought everything was okay until today. She had been aloof, she didn't talk to me as often as she used to. I thought it was about me... And then the painful reality struck. I asked why is she behaving like that and she told that... When I said that bad thing to her, she was so shooked up, she went to a nightclub, had drinks and one thing led to another.. she kissed another man. And she had held that in her all that time. I was devastated, i didn't know what to do. She was so embarrassed about what she did and didn't want to be with me anymore because of that one mistake. She isn't that type of girl who kisses random guys. She knows it and I know it. I said that i forgive her but it wasn't enough. My heart is broken, shattered to pieces. Since she was my everything, I really don't know how am I gonna live on. I truly hope that she changes her mind and that love against me is stronger than feeling guilty about what was done.
I really love her. I don't know what to do...


       

Bay

January 22, 2015 @ (Michigan)

Tags: bad breakup breakups sad depressed#miss fat god love sadness cheated cheater cheatedon bae bay babe happy funny guys girls emo scene emo scene hair


July 9, 2013. the best day I've ever lived. I remember it so clearly. the day we met in person. the day we kissed. he was, and still is, the best person I've met. but I've learned a lot about great people since I met him. I learned that no one is all around perfect. he was like.. a sociopath. he always pretended to be completely faithful. I knew so much about him, even though I pretended not to. I knew in my heart that he was a sociopath. I guess I never put the pieces together.
more towards the end of us, I began to be very depressed. he said he just wanted me to be happy. but I think what he really wanted.. was for me to leave him alone. I was scared. I was scared that other girls were better than myself. he knew this about me.
so, we argued very much. one day we argued and he decided to "break up" with me, which was something that started happening recently. we would break up and get back together a few minutes later. this time though, he took it a step further. he talked to a girl that I specifically told him he could not talk to because they used to flirt with each other all the time. well, all I knew was that they had flirted, and I wasn't okay with that. but little did I know.
so, I talked to her. I apologized for being rude to her before because I never knew exactly what happened between the two of them. she told me exactly what happened. she said that he led her on for 3 months, WHILE he was dating me. she didn't know that he was dating me. she said that she gave him a few blow jobs and they went to the movies twice together. she said that she was under the impression that they were together. until one day, he told her that he was using her. he switched schools and stopped talking to her. she thought I knew about that, but I didn't. all I knew was that they spoke over snapchat and they flirted. maybe if I wasn't so oblivious about the whole thing, I would've known. I was just so in love, I guess. it wasn't something I wanted to believe.
so, after she told me this, I realized that I was just lied to for over a year.. by a guy that I thought cared about me. he looked me in my eyes and told me that he kissed 2 girls in his life. he looked me in my eyes and told me nothing happened between them. I should have known. it hurt me for so long just to know that he flirted with her because it was something he didn't even feel guilty about. I don't understand how he could do something like this to me.
and now it feels like I spent a year and seven months of my life on someone who didn't care about me very much. someone who pretended. and every happy memory is just like trash. it's useless to me but it hurts me so bad. everywhere I go, I remember what him


       

Ariel

November 03, 2013 @ (Denver, CO)

Tags: douche, bad breakup, young love, love, like, sad, depression, boys, guys, girls, jerk, douchebag


Well, this guy and I started dating last summer. I've known him for such a long time (since elementary school maybe) and we were just like best friends. At first.. I thought it'd all turn out fine. There was still that shimmer of doubt but my heart blinded me to the point where I was convinced that we were unbreakable.

I remember when we used to pull all nighters on the phone and my dad would be SO mad because I didn't sleep at all that night and didn't want to get up in the morning.. The thing was, he had a girlfriend. He dumped her for me. Of course, I felt really guilty, but, I really liked him and the truth is, I was very flattered because I didn't think anyone would ever do that for me. He was literally my everything. I adored him in every way possible. He was so funny; he'd always make me laugh and I could have sworn we were made for each other. All my friends LOVED him, his personality is literally the best.. he's sensitive


       

Jenny

February 20, 2013 @ (Canada)

Tags: boyfriend, liar


This all began after I had broken up with my ex ( connor.) I wanted something new and exciting. 2 weeks after, my bestfriend introduced me to a guy by giving me his number. His name was Mathew. Good looking, had his own car, fun

From the moment I met him there was something about him. He would always pick me up, bought me expensive gifts, which was unnecessary but I loved it. The thing with mathew was that, his stories never seemed to add up, and about the silly things. For example, he would tell me that he didnt like this movie, and a month later he would say he really liked it. We would always get in these confrontations because I never knew what was going on in his head. He was an amazing liar. He had many issues, his dad was an alcoholic, he had issues within himself. I wanted to be there with him every step of the way, I gave up so much for this guy. He had never told anyone he loved them before, it was a HUGE thing for him, and finally after seeing a psychologist for that and other problems, after a year we had been dating, he finally told me he loved me. I left for hawaii with my family shortly after, and we would talk on facebook even though I found he was being really distant.

When I came back, I had a feeling something was off. I asked him if he had been going out behind my back, and he took my hand, looked at my straight in my eyes and said " I promised I havent been lying to you about ANYTHING. " But that was lie within itself.

I found out that he had been lying to me, well everyone about his personality, who is he. As i mentionned above how he would lie about liking a movie, even a certain food- only to get me to like him. And it worked! He never ever told me things that he didnt like about me. If i did something to piss him off, he wouldnt tell me and he would go talk shit about me to other people to get his anger out.. I didnt know this. I had broken up with him, and he seemed really sad and guilty, so i offered a break, just for few days to think things over. 4 days later I contact him, and he tells me to get out of his life, he hates me, he was only with me cause he felt bad for me..? im so confused. Apparently he was just tired of pretending to be someone else around me, and having bottled up all his emotions he blew up on me.

What I fell inlove with was just a bunch of lies put together. Right before we went on break, he admitted to me that the psychologist wanted to send him to see a psychiatrist, im guessing to get diagnosed with most likely a personality disorder. Its hard for me to move on from here because I just keep thinking back on what was true and what was a lie.. Ill never know. I seen pictures of him clubbing 2 days ago and it hurt me so much. Im doing my best to move on, I really thought this guy loved me, I shouldve listening to the warning signs from the begining.


       

Nan El

January 01, 2013 @ (New York)

Tags: Cheating with co-worker, 3 years of lies


Over three years ago I started dating a man that was selfish, a cheater, a liar and just plain self centered. He admitted this to me. I was hesitant at first but it didn't take long for him to have me believing that he wanted to be a better man for me. We worked together for years and once he transferred to another department, that's when we started dating. He asked me to marry him after just a few months and treated me as if I was the only woman on earth. We spent constant time together and he would look me in the eyes everyday and tell me how much he loves and adores me and wants to be with only me the rest of his life. I introduced him to my kids and he moved in with us shortly thereafter. He lived with us for one year and during that time he started drifting, working more...going out longer with his friends. He started telling me he was having a hard time living with kids (who I only have half the week) and he only saw them maybe twice a week. He told me he couldn't live with us anymore and it just wasn't "him". The day after he moved out he was begging for me back and this went on and off for a year and a half. We broke up last December of 2011 because he couldn't handle things...all while still claiming to love me and not want anyone else. For about 6 weeks we went back and forth about our love for each other then he said he needs me and promises to be the man II need. I took him back and we were together up until October of this past year 2012....still back and forth with his feelings...but kept promising to marry me and move back in. I broke up with him in October when he told me he couldn't take vacation to Disney World with me and the kids which was planned and paid for and was happening in 3 weeks!! He continued to text and call me crying that he needs me, etc... But his gram was sick and he didn't want to go anywhere. He made me feel guilty for taking vacation without him! When I returned right after Thanksgiving, I started finding out some things from people and emails, etc.. He started sleeping with one of my employees last year when we broke up...she works very closely with me. They broke up when he got back together with me...but then he contacted her to "get together" in April, May and November. We went to a concert together in June and they acted like they didn't even know each other then went to get beer for 20 minutes together! At that point I had no reason to think anything of it. Once I confronted both of them, they denied even knowing each other and called me crazy. She ultimately confessed but they are both still claiming it wasn't all year long. She has had boyfriends this whole time as well. I am now in a situation where they both still work for the company and she still reports to me. They act as if nothing is wrong and life is good....they show no remorse. By the way, she is 12 years younger than him! I have so much pain and it is in my face everyday. How do I get over it?


       

Liz

December 24, 2012 @ (Lost)

Tags: emotional, regret


so back in october I started talking to this guy (he's 18 and so am I), at first we weren't fond of each other because of a certain situation but slowly we started talking on good terms, I got to know him and he took the time to get to know me, we hung out a few times and I started developing feelings or a crush towards him. soon after on november 1st 2012 we started dating officially, we would see each other every day and sometimes he would come over out of the blue unexpectedly. I found these gestures sweet at a point and we would constantly spend time together. Myself, I really don't have many friends and I have a real fear of trusting people because of my past but I let that go with him. I was head over heels up until now when I slipped into a depression. I got sick with bronchitis and we couldn't see each other for a few days but he still wanted to see me although we could not kiss because of my sickness and he was pretty sick himself. I started having doubts in the back of my head was this what I really wanted. He treated me so well like a princess, we had our little arguments yes but that never changed how I felt and we always had great communication with each other and he all around cared about me and never have I ever been treated that way by any guy and it sort of gave me hope that things were going to change for me for once. he always complimented me although I never felt beautiful and I was also having problems with my life ie. college, family problems but he was there to asure me he wasn't going anywhere which scared me even more. I started feeling as if when I kissed him I didn't feel right because he said he was slowly falling for me but I was trying hard to keep myself from falling for him seeing as the duration of the time we've been together. He makes me so happy, he brightens my day and since we've broken up these past few days I feel empty and regretful and just guilty. I feel as if I let something good go and I'm not sure if I'll ever find that again, but I had to let him go if I did not feel right at that time because I slowly started feeling depressed again. I felt as if I couldn't feel for him the way he wanted me to and it hurts because I hurt him and he did nothing wrong. Was is that he was clinging on too much that I started to feel this way? I'm so confused and lost, that I'm not sure if this was right or if it was. I'm scared I may have lost out on my forever.