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457 Results For 'friends'

Bob David

May 03, 2012 @ (san diego)

Tags: Acceptance


We met when I was 21 and she was just turning 18, a little over 5 years ago. There was instant attraction and our relationship advanced quickly. I knew deep down that neither of us were mature enough to be in a long term committed relationship, but we stuck together anyways. There were a lot of good times, fun memories, amazing sex and we were always there for eachother through the ups and downs. About two years into the relationship there were multiple infadelities-- she started sleeping with one of my good friends behind my back and I had slept around with more than 1 girl. Despite this huge blow to our trust and relationship, we stuck together after we came clean with each other on what we had done. In hindsight I know that we stuck together because we were attached and had some form of needyness with each other. I feel weak to admit that, but I honestly just felt attached and couldn't let her go despite the fact that we had both hurt each other severely and that we deserved better. I knew in my heart at the time that I should have let her go, but my impulsive needyness forced me to hold on to a relationship that had become toxic. Since then we tried to rebuild the foundation of trust in our relationship, but we were fighting an uphill battle and there was just too much insecurity and distrust towards eachother. A year and a half ago we moved in together, which was a big mistake. Things were ok on the surface, but deep down we both felt disconnected and unhappy with the relationship. Along the way we became very short tempered and irritated with eachother. She would yell and call me names, I would yell back and say hurtful things-- stuff you just don't do when you say that you love someone. I knew in my heart for a long time it was not right and that I needed to let go, but I just didn't have the courage to part company with her. I feel ashamed for having held on to something that I knew was not right for me. We broke up about 5 weeks ago after she did not come home one night. She told me she went out to party with her friends and stayed with a female co-worker, but my intuition told me otherwise. We both agreed that we were not right together and both needed to stand on our own two feet. We were together for 5 and a half years and although I know that it was not the right relationship for me I still feel a deep sense of loss an emotional pain. Despite having hurt eachother I had considered her my best friend-- we did everything together and wanted desperately to make things work. I have been trying so hard for the last 5 weeks to look at the reality of the relationship, but my mind keeps wanting to tell me that we could have made it work or that I should have been a better man. The fact is I was immature and acted with the level of maturity and awareness that I had at the time-- I think it's fair to say that she did too. I keep beating myself up over what I could have done differently and all the what if's, but it has only held me back from letting go and moving on. I am trying so hard to accept that it's over, but still find myself hoping for reconciliation in the future-- hope that is eating me up inside. I know that we both deserve better and that it cannot work. I am not one to share my personal story on an online forum such as this, but I started reading a book the other day that suggested I post about the breakup on this website. It has been helpful typing this story up and putting things into perspective. I think it's important that I look at my past relationship logically rather than feed off of my emotions. Anyways, I know my story probably sounds crazy or like I am a bad guy for having cheated, but I would appreciate any feedback. I am now 26 and have come to so many realizations in reflecting on the relationship. I really want to better myself and become the best man that I can be not only for myself, but so that I can have a healthy, loving relationship in the future. Most importantly I want to love myself so I never put myself in a toxic relationship again where I think that I don't deserve better. Anyways, stay strong to everyone that is going through similar heart break or emotional pain. Everyone keeps telling me it will pass-- I just hope that it does sooner than later!


       

Bella

April 27, 2012 @ (new york)

Tags: breakup


We met back in high school, good friends I can say. Yes I was attracted to him but never paid attention to that. he's older so he graduated before I did and we lost contact. 3 years later I randomly thought of him and look him up on Facebook. We exchange numbers and make plans to hang out. We hung out a few times just as friends,it was great I had a blast with him. We spent every night together just hanging out for about a month then he invites me to his place and, we hook up. He admits to me he had a thing for me back in high school too. We start seeing each other and after awhile we discuss ”us” and we agree to take things to the next level later on cause we're not ready. I loved everything about being with him, everything. We often had fights but that never really effected us. The situation at home took a turn for the worse when I had to make the decision of moving out of state, rather far. I try to find an alternate solution before breaking it to him but no luck. I break the news to him - I'd never seen him so angry. Not the reaction I was expecting. Everything went downhill from there. I wasn't suppose to leave for another 2 months though but we started to drift before that. I start seeing someone else - rebound I guess, I was both hurt and angry at him. He cuts me off when he finds out about it. It turns out Im staying and not moving out of state, still moving from that town though. I was over him, I thought. All my things are packed, half of my furniture is out. He lives maybe 10 blocks from me, 3 minute drive. I feel so guilty about the way things ended so I get in contact with him and ask him to see me. It took some convincing but he agreed to see me that night. He picks me up, the car ride is silent until I b lurt out how sorry I am. We never officially ended what we had, so when I got with this new guy, he was under the impression that we were still together and that's why he cut off - a total misunderstanding. That evening/morning was amazing. I thought everything would go back to normal, maybe even better than before. He drops me off in the morning, says he can see himself falling in love with me and that even when I was with that other guy I was still his girl and all this other bullshit. I go to bed, and wake up to his texts. We talk all day and all night. But that's the last day I saw him. The Next day he doesn't reply to anything I send him. Days go by, and still nothing. I was so utterly confused and hurt. I resort to Facebook I finally get a reply and all he says is ” what do you want?” I get the hint, just don't understand why. But okay, whatever.
It never occurred to me that I didn't mention to him that I wasn't moving out of state.
Months go by. I'm with other men but none of them phase me - the way he did. I get in contact with him and we end up having a very casual conversation. At the very least I thought we could keep our friendship but again, cuts me off. Wtf!
Here I am a year later, still thinking about him. I can't have a successful relationship because I still have some very strong feelings for him.
All my friends tell me to let it go... How many times have I tried that already? It seems impossible. It's not that I want to be with him, I just want an explanation so I can sleep at night.
If I had the opportunity to talk to him, do you think I should? I wouldn't know what to say or how to say it. I don't know how he'd react to me..


       

Payuyi

April 19, 2012 @ (new york)

Tags: sad


We were eachothers first love, everything was soo perfect untill one day when we got in a fight because he said he was going on a date with a girl, of course i got mad and told him not to talk to me anymore then he told me that i was going to be that date and i apologized but i guess it was too late by now he told me that it was best if we broke up because i jump to conclusions and the distance. The next day we got back together but then for a month and about 2 weeks things werent the same anymore we were on and off, i kept leaving him because he wasnt sweet and i just felt unapreciated all the time but my love for him was so strong that i kept beggin him to come back and he did but each time it was getting harder and harder. I did tell him how he made me feel and he said he was 'trying' but it didnt feel like it.
He really hates my Bff and one day when i was feeling really bad and unapreciated i told my bestfriend to say he was in love with me, he got mad and started hating him even more, at first i was a little happy knowing he cared, thats all i ever wanted him to care for me and love me as much as i love him.
One day after our last breakup we were talking and then i got confused with somthing he said and i thought he said my bff told him everything, *by this time me and my bff got in a fight so i thought he was trying to get back at me* so i explained to him y i told my bff to say that , i told him i just wanted him to care but he just got really mad and acted like he hated me, i know that was a really bad idea and i regret doing that.. he told me to hurt my bff and i said ok i was *i wasnt tho* and i told him how i felt, that i loved him and that i just want him to be sweet again but all he kept saying was 'ok' to my long messages.. he has my fB info and he read a conversation with another friend where i said me and my bff made up, he sent me a message telling me he never felt this used before and that i lied to him all the times when i said i loved him.
i told him he had no right to get upset becasue he wanted me to screw off and that i did love him
thn i told him that i was really sorry and that i was always gonna love him and that i was gonna leave him alone now.
Well i ended my friendship with my bff cuz i knew that was wat he wanted even tho it wasnt gonna change anything between us, i havent been on fB at all in 2 weeks.. ive been trying to get over him thats why i havent been on but part of me says maybe he realized how important you are to him this time you were gone. Im really scared of loggin in Fb because wat if he already has another girl i dnt wanna see that and get hurt and wat if when i log in i find a message saying he wants me back and now everything will change to the way it was , wat if all we needed was a lil break
idk im just stuck i have hope that everything will go back to how it was before but at the same time im scared of finding out somthing i dnt wanna know
*i dnt have him as a friend on fb anymore but i cn still see his picture cuz he was the last message*
i want to move on but its soo hard idk wat to do.. any advise? :/


       

Anonymous

April 19, 2012 @ (belfast)

Tags: confused


i been with my partner for almost 3 years and for the last couple of months he has been finding any reason he can to fight with me and i dont know why he even told me that im just a slut that no guy will ever want ive never cheated on him ive never hurt him im always trying to keep him happy but its like he just doesnt care but anyway i have been talking to my dads friends son who is also a really good friend of mine and hes always been there for me ever since we met but recently he asked me to leave my partner to move down with him because hes in love with me and i love my partner with all my heart but i dont think he loves me anymore but i dont know whether i should stay with him or call it quits while i still can even my dad wants me to leave him but says that its my choice my friend is a really good guy who always tells me im beautiful and that i deserve more and that he loves how im kind to everyone and i put all my friends and family before myself but i really dont know what to do can anyone help me please??


       

Veronica

April 18, 2012 @ (US)

Tags: female, emotional, slapped


I'm a bit embarrassed about this, but cut me a little slack, this happened 20+ years ago, and I was an emotional, young college girl at the time (an English Lit/Drama major no less). I had been romantically involved with this guy for about six months and it seemed to me that we just couldn’t take things to the next level and it would be in both of our interests to move on. So one day, I decided to have a heart to heart chat with him, going to great lengths to be sensitive to his feelings, and getting a little emotional in the process of saying it was time to end things. His response? Well, very casual, dry (he was an engineering major, go figure;) and hmmm, maybe even a little cheerful. He said with a smile, “yeah, you’re right, it’s probably the best thing.” Well, I was stunned by his lack of disappointment and asked if that was all he had to say. He again replied casually, “yeah, I think that’s about it.” I had invested the past six months of my life with this guy and he didnt seem to be the least bit upset that I was breaking up with him?! That was more than I could take. I stood up from the bench we were sitting on in the heart of the campus quad (imagine a diminutive Asian gal hovering over a large, strapping male), gently lifted his chin (by the look on his face, he may have been expecting a good bye kiss) and then SMACK — he got a hearty slap, right across the face. Of course I walked away in a huff, a complete, emotional wreck. Later on, I talked about it with a few of my sorority sisters and of course got hugged, consoled, etc. Then one of my sisters said something like “so wait a minute….you broke up with him and then slapped him?”. It then occurred to me how ridiculous the scenario was! Laughter ensued along with lots of good-natured teasing from my friends. The story doesn’t end there. A few days later, he sent me flowers and an apology card. I’m not sure if the poor guy even knew what he was apologizing for! ;-)


       

Rio F

April 01, 2012 @ (uk)

Tags: breakup, lonely


i was dumped on exmas day. it hurt soo much. to make things worse we had just bought a house ten days before!!! i felt like it was the end of the world! it still hurts a lot that people can mess u up just like that - espically someone u loved so much. i moved away from friends and family and now i am stuck in a nightmare. when i finish work and come home i am so lonely. time passing has helped but doesnt hide the fact my life is in ruins....


       

Jannet

March 22, 2012 @ (somewhere)

Tags: bestfriends


*Im a teenager*
it was in Jan, this year when me and lets say his names BOB started going out but im going to far...so it was october when we met and we met thru his girlfriend(lets say her names SUZY) so SUZY was one of my bestfriends at the time (now we completely hate eachother but thats a whole other story) and BOB and SUZY were going out anyways so we started texting and then we finally saw eachother at school and we starting talking alot so much it became daily and we became bestfriends. and yea it wasnt actually "bestfriends" cuz we had only known eachother for about a month. but it felt that way to us... he told me everything and i did to...then him and suzy broke up..but then he met my other bestfriend(lets say her name is KIM) and he starting liking her which then turned into love and KIM started going out w him.. so then they broke up and then they started going out again and then on new years eve about 12 minutes after midnight we were texting and he told me he loved me but he was buzzed cuz he had been drinking a little for new years and so i thought he ws joking so the next day i asked him if it was true and he said "only if i wanted it to be" then about on jan 9 he broke up w KIM... FOR ME..i couldnt believe it..he was saying that she was the girl for him and then he dumps her for me! and so he said his love for her was never true and that he knew it was for me cuz he KNEW me and cuz i understood him..i believed him bc i felt and still feel the same way..but he is a trublemaker and so he got suspened from school and got grounded from his fone and hanging out so our other connections were failed and i didnt see him for about 2 weeks and then when he got back he asked me out then two days later he got expelled and we didnt talk about a month later i finally gave up on him returing back and i broke up w him over facebook..he said it was "cool we could still be friends" that was the last i heard of him... i knew our friendship was broken too..we were so close that i never knew that one mistake like that could end it.. and now on i still hope one day we will end up together or hopefully be friends again..even if i only knew him for 5 months he was the only person i have ever felt that close to.. so do you think he ever did love me?


       

April

March 20, 2012 @ (Texas)

Tags: tag, youre it


I met him in high school. I was one of the most popular girls and I got along with every social group and every type of person. He was a shy guy. One of those skater looking guys, always with music playing on his iPod and still managing to get good grades even though it looked like he was day dreaming all the time. Nobody knew him in high school until I came into his life and made him popular. We didnt do everything together, but we still spent our extra time together. After years of being apart, we got married. I sacrificed everything for him... including my friends, family, and my own health...

But tonight my feelings are changed. I don't love him as I did. He has been sneaking around behind my back. And that is something I will not forgive. Its time he learned the harsh reality of his wrong doings.

He is so afraid of me leaving him. I plan to. But I'm choosing to do it when he least expects it. I'm going to pack up all my things and leave while he is at work.

Sucks to be made a fool of, and now it is his turn.

Good luck finding another diamond in the dust. You selfish boy. :)


       

Jill

March 18, 2012 @ (Up the hill..)

Tags: Jill, jack, pale of water


One night my best friend and I were waiting for my parents to pick us up from a party when my phone started buzzing. When I looked down It was a guy in my grade named jack, it was really random since we hardly ever text. And at that moment, when I got that text I knew I liked him and he liked me. We started texting from early in the morning to late at night everyday, and we never ran out of things to talk about. He finally asked me out at school and we were the most adorable couple. At parties it was always just him and I hanging out being all over each other and being little kids together. He was so sweet to me. And then things started getting rocky. Suddenly he wouldn't text me as much and he would make the rudest comments to me. Then he just broke up with me. I mean it's not like I didn't have it coming because I knew we were having problems anyways. But I was still heart broken. He then started flirting with all my friends and getting super close to my best friend, the same girl in the beginning. But one night when I was missing him the most he texted me saying how sorry he was and how he wanted me back so badly. I agreed and immediately went to tell my best friend excitedly. She broke down in tears over the phone saying how sorry she was and what a terrible friend she had been. She then explained how jack and her were talking the whole time we were dating and how she technically got him to break up with me. I was so confused and happy and heart broken at the same time. But I trusted her and forgave them both. Even tho he doesn't know that I know he did that. We dated a few more months and all of a sudden he broke up with me again. She did the exact same thing to me again. Now I can't look at either of them the way I used to. I don't want to forgive, when now I can't forget..


       

Eleonor

March 16, 2012 @ (Sussex)

Tags: Michael, Tom, Jared


Ever known a person who you constantly fight with? Like every single day?

Well that's the case with me and Tom. We argue so much, scream at each other.. But I love him to bits.. here's my story.

We met 3 years ago in college and I remember saying eeww he's so unattractive. We spoke a bit but that's the end of it. Three months later I met him at a function where I was bored out of my mind and he came up to me and said hey aren't you the person I spoke to around 3 months ago and I was like yes now I remember you. Anyway so we got talking and my dad phoned me and told me he couldn't take me back home that night so Tom drove me home. We are both into acting and around 2 months later were taking place in the same show and that's where we exchanged numbers. I was in a relationship at the time but as time passed I started to develop a soft spot for Tom and forgot my initial outlook on him.

Things got pretty ugly with my then boyfriend and it was Tom who I would phone at all times crying because my boyfriend was treating me like dirt. He supported me and helped me through the breakup, and 3 days after my breakup he held my hand so I was so confused.

Come April and as much as I liked Tom I had strong feelings for another guy- Jared. We started dating and Tom was devastated and didn't speak to me for like 2 whole months then when I broke up with Jared he was the one who I turned to and he held me and supported me. Then the shock of my life came when as I was crying he kissed me.. I was so confused I didn't know whether he liked me or not..

We had a Summer romance, we would do everything together and I loved him so much and was always loyal to him and was head over heels in love with him but my friends would tell me why him he is so unattractive and I would say I think he is handsome because I know his character well and I have learned to see over and above physical beauty.

He was so romantic, we would take long walks by the beach, make out in his car, go to quite places and spend the night making out there.

Then college started again and everything changed. We see each other often there. One night we both drank a lot and got really drunk and started making out in front of everyone and I don't know why he was embarrassed by it and when we met the next day he wasn't the same as usual..

He would ignore me, shout and fight with me and act like a total loser. Then this really fit guy started speaking to me and I told Tom do you like me he said no why I said fine then I'm going to start dating Michael and he didnt speak to me anymore.

I got into a relationship with Michael and since then things between Tom and I have been disastrous. We meet in college and then there's lots of flirting but then we fight so much all the time and compete coz we have classes together and he asked me how much I got in my Anatomy exam and I said A+ and he yelled at me coz he got an A.

Last week we met up with some of his friends and he held my hand and things really seemed weird. Coz I like Michael and he's really sweet and I know that Tom is just playing with my feelings now and he is jealous and possessive and doesn't like the fact that I am dating another guy yet he is too much of a jackass to commit to me :/


       








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