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Jess

October 24, 2013 @ (Florida)

At the beginning, I knew better. I knew better than to date someone who I hadn't been friends with for a while.
I knew better.
Yet still I was determined that this guy I was seeing, was worth it all and that everything would work out. He promised me. Doesn't he know how to keep promises?
His parents got in the way. Always. I learned to accept that, and even though they would insult me to the point of tears, I never gave up on this guy. I never lied, cheated, or never kept my promises.
I let him in, and we enjoyed eachothers company. Just two lovers, happy with no interruptions.
I learned his likes: Baseball, Christ, Spicy Food, Powerade Zero Orange, Orange anything, Food always, and much more.
I learned his goals: Finish college, own his own Chick-Fil-A or sports bar.
All of my friends loved this guy, because I was happy.
I really was happy.
He never really went out of his way unless I begged though. I wasn't sure how to take it, but I never got really upset. I just asked him to please do something to make me feel special.
He ALWAYS promised.
Lies?
I mean he always said he had a surprise for me, and the times he actually gave me a note, it would be two sentences.
Still, I was happy.
Suddenly I became less important.
Morning texts consisted of "Good morning, love you." You're telling me you had 30 minutes ride to college and all I got was that?
It used to be "Pick me up at 10:30AM, let me ditch school to be with you."
Suddenly, I didn't feel like enough, and even though he reassured me that I was, he never showed it anymore.
My birthday weekend was terrible. Last minute he decided what was more important, It wasn't me. Not even on my birthday weekend.
I was upset. I forgave him.
We moved on, but he no longer kept his word that he had surprises.
Why lie?
I became a part of his life and suddenly he could lie to me.
I loved him anyways.
I don't know if I expected too much, but I didn't ask for a lot.
I gave him so much.
I always supported him with any decision he ever made.
I tried to make him happy still.
I recieved broken promises.
My sister died. It hit me so hard, but I never showed it.
I didn't want to bring him down.
He never asked if I was okay. Not once.
I wasn't okay. I'm STILL not.
I loved him anyways.
He lied to me and said he would go to the funeral with me.
I felt special.
Then he said no... I felt worthless.
He could see how much pain I was in, he still said no.
I forgave him. That is unforgivable. I needed him and he walked away, work was more important.
I still went to his work, I hugged him and cried. He made everything okay suddenly.
Suddenly, I didn't feel worthless.
Then came Sunday.
I was broken. My mom was in the hospital, my sister died.
Broken.
He broke me MORE.
He walked away from me at the worst time.
I let him go, he didn't fight to stay.
Suddenly, those endless nights talking, random walks, the aquarium, my birthday, the baseball games and laughing in bed... were to be broken memories.
We talked that night. He lied. He gave me false hope.
We got back together and suddenly it was okay. We could fix this. Love could fix anything.
I forgave him.
He broke me even more.
Suddenly he ignored me all day. We spoke only late at night.
His parents got in the way. I could see how much he let them control him and his happiness.
He hid me from them, like I was the dirt beneath them.
He toyed with my emotions. We were together, he just wouldn't tell anyone.
Worthless.
I broke even more.
I tried to forgive him.
It was my turn to stand up and walk away.
I did.
---

And now it's been a week and I found out I'm pregnant. He knows this, and I'm pretty sure he wants to get back together because of it, and because he says he wants to be with me because it was a mistake to break it off.

A couple days later, I figured out he deleted every picture of me and us off of his facebook (he says he didn't do it), like the 11 months we were together didn't exist, I didn't exist and I could be erased that easily.

So I took him out, between college classes, and we fell back into the routine. He made me laugh, smile, even looked me dead in the eyes and said he wanted me back. Well it's a little embarrassing seeing as his mother is his friend on facebook and probably saw everything erased of us. Still, I was considering it.

I went to drop him back off at College, and I sat there in my car asking him if he had flirted with any girls. He said no. So I said, alright... Well let me see your phone (I honestly wasn't snooping, I just wondered if he still had pictures of us in his photo album. He did.)

Right then a girl messaged him and it opened up, and I know I shouldn't of read any of it, but I did. Shame on me. IT WAS ON FACEBOOK CHAT. It went like this:

Him: Hey
Her: Hey
Him: How are you?
Her: Didn't you just break up with your girlfriend?
Him: How do you know I had a girl?
Her: Look I don't have time for this nonsense.
Him: Do you want to get to know me?
Her: Go sit in front of a TV with a tub of icecream.

And that was it. I told him to get his shit and get out of my car. Generally, if you want someone back, you don't go around flirting?

He texted me saying he was sorry, that it was just a question. I was pissed, he sat there and acted like I didn't even exist, talking to other girls. How serious was he about getting back together, because HE was the one who suggested it. Turns out that wasn't the only girl he had been talking to.

He then turned it on me saying, "I thought we were done and you were talking to other guys, that's why I did it."

No, actually I don't play with peoples emotions. I hadn't talked to any guys. I wouldn't of anyways, but the fact that I'm pregnant and knew he needed to be there in this childs life, pushed me even further to try and make it work out.

I'm so confused!

FALLENSPAWN

October 21, 2013 @ (the AMERICAS (NORTH))

Tags: It was interesting

I had left work due to medical reasons and shortly afterwards I was rushed into ICU for heart complications, and multi-organ failure. Meanwhile my girlfriend at the time was fired from her job and unannounced to myself left the country all together. Weeks in ICU attempting to contact her to finally receive the message "It was nice to know you, I have no need in that country anymore" hangup. Meanwhile here I am on my deathbed pretty much going wth ...

Nothing

October 20, 2013 @ (india)

Tags: End of a relationship

Finally its over a mother daughter relationship between a teacher and student, about 6 years i hold on with a person who doesn't loved me back. I was with her in her good and bad times. I helped her as much as i could. Gave my full attention,love and trust but,, its not enough to being loved back. I dont want to complain about her coz its my mistake to hold on with someone very long time after been neglected so many times. its very hard to forgot her i used to text her all the time.. thanks for her patience to bear my disturbance. i got my clearance now. tones of time i tried to break this relationship but i couldn't but its clear now its the time to give up and not looking back anymore.. The past has nothing new to say.. she hated she hates and she 'll. Now i got a job. I am gonna give my sincerity to my company rather than wasting time like this.. may be im wrong now but i'll be right someday.. Thanks for reading ..

PerplexedGirl

September 28, 2013 @ (Cali)

Tags: bad breakup, heartbroken, perplexed, sad, tears, crying

I dated my last boyfriend for a year and a half. We met in a waiting room where we waited for our kids a couple times a week. We had so much in common and hit it off immediately. We went on wkend adventures and had a blast. After only a few months he told me he was in love with me. He said he wanted to tell me earlier, but he was afraid to. I was so charmed by him. His ex wife was a bit crazy and they fought over their kid all the time. His ex was mad that I had dinner with him and the kid and yelled at him that they agreed to wait until dating someone 6 months before they spent time with the kid. (Which of course, she did not follow). So he then has us wait 8 months before I can spend time with him and the kid together. When he finally decides it's okay, we all spend LOTS of time together and he and I spend all our child free weekends together. He tells me I am "the one", "It's meant to be", that he has never been so happy, he is so in love, etc. He texts daily, writes me a poem, declares his love all the time. In person he is affectionate and kind. We discuss buying land together and aspects of our home we will have. We plan a vacation together with our kids. We go on the trip and everyone has a lot of fun. He gets in some arguments with his kid related to her mother, but otherwise everything was fine. When we get home he tells me thanks for the awesome vacation and a text that says "I love you so so so so much, now more than ever".
Fast forward one month after vacation. He breaks up with me in an email!!
He says that some things have occured to him and that he could not live with me and so what is the point and goodbye.
I am shocked and ask to meet with him. He says yes, but then never does. He won't answer his phone. His kid calls me one day to say how much she misses me and that she is afraid that I don't like her anymore because of her dad. I assure her that is not true, but I have no idea what her father told her because he will not talk to me. He texts me the next day and says that telling his daughter anything other than "it didn't work out" is inappropriate!! and to lose her number!! As if I called her!! ???
Two months after the breakup he sends me another email saying that he is sorry, but not asking for forgiveness. ?
Then he proceeds to tell me the 3 kinds of love in the world, one for your kids, one for your sister/mother and then the kind you can't breathe without the person....and that I fall into the sister/mother category for him. After all those months of love declarations and of course lots of sex, I fall into the mother/sister category??? WTF?
I have no tears left for this freak and have moved on. Thank goodness.

Jay

September 24, 2013 @ (Germany)

Tags: Bad breakup

Her and I were together for 5 months. It was great and all but eventually she became bossy and a snotty bitch. She would always point out y flaws, never let me have a say in anything, and she would yell at me... A lot!!! Honestly it turned to a point where I was losing it. It felt like we no longer had the same sense of humor, we would fight over the smallest things, and she was changing me to something I'm not. This girl got me into a lot of shit, she also got me in huge trouble at school (but that's another story). I did a lot for her and trust me when I say a lot.

On our last date she was being rude to me, through out the entire date she kept upsetting me. The fact that my feelings for her were deep I took every thing she said seriously. But towards the end everything bottled up and I exploded on her just dumped right there and then.

It hurt me to dump her and I never knew I had it in me to do it. Although there was bad times in our relationship there were also good. And knowing I wasn't going to be with her this summer it really sucked. That doesn't matter anymore. I must admit I miss her and I do think about her time to time. But I believe everything happens for a reason. That reason was for me to find someone better, and I did. This new relationship is so far better. It really is and throughout this new relationship we experienced more than what I experienced with my ex. I hope this new relationship will be longer than my previous ones. And to all you people in this site: please believe there will be someone for you. I promise it took me a while to realize that!!

Asdfghjklm

May 14, 2013 @ (Belgium)

Tags: ignored, heartbroken

So... I had a girlfriend & we were happy. We texted 24/7 & my friends would kill to have a relationship like we had.

The week before she went on her vacation with her family, she became annoying. She was just... a different girl. She was upset all the time & she yelled at people (especially me)I downloaded Whatsapp so we could talk without high costs. So, she went on vacation & we talked the first day. Everything was great, she had much fun. After that, she didn't answer anymore. I thought "Maybe she doesn't have time, or no internet" then two days before she went home, I spoke to my best friend. He told me "T. is hilarious @ twitter" So I asked him which T. he ment & He answered "You know, T. your girlfriend." I couldn't believe it so I asked him "How long has she been on twitter?" And he told me she was on twitter for the past 2 days, hours in a row. My heart was shattered by those words. I was very upset. The day she went home I texted her again, still no reply. So I broke up with her with tears in my eyes & those words "I'm done. If you don't want to talk to me, just tell me. You know I'll never get upset for that kind of stuff." So the next day she showed up explaining me why she started to ignore me. She told me she wasn't ready for a serious relationship & that she had a hard time at home. I bought it. I told her that even though we broke up I'll always be there for her. But she just deleted me out of her life. A few days later, she comes back around again to talk with MY bestfriends. She asked me to never talk to her again, so I did. The days passed by as I tried not to show any emotions. Then, after a week, she started to flirt with my best friend... (The one she spoked to @ twitter)I was BROKEN. I started to believe that she'd never loved my at all. I started to realise that the real reason behind our breakup was my best friend. She fell in love with my best friend, who is also in a relationship. But the worst of all is... She made everyone around her think that I'm the one who broke HER.

Sadlonelyconfused

May 07, 2013 @ (San Francisco)

Tags: Crush, first, kiss, bad, relationship, teenagers, dumb, love

I have had a crush on this girl sinse the first grade, it started off as us hating each other but it was one of those cute kid cover up things. In middle school there were other girls I hooked up with, other girl friends, so I forgot about this girl for a long time. After dealing with a fair amount of drama with other girls, I started to have feeling for this girl again, this is by the time puberty has hit us both and she became more than just the girl I liked, she became beautiful, so other guys started hitting on her too. Around this time me and he started getting flirty, this lasted for a while until I asked her out, but she said no because she felt like we were too close as friends and she didn't want to loose me. So I was heart broken or whatever but I bounced back and everything was fine between us. We texted all summer and saw each other a few times, it almost felt like we were together, but we weren't. I got over her and started focusing on my studies so for a while all I did was study and party, everything was going fine, I was happy. Then my best female friend told me that she and my old crush were talking and that she found out that she kind of liked me but was going to wait for me to ask her out. So I waited, partied more, and eventually got around to asking her out, again, and she said yes. That marked the start of our month line awkward excuse of a relationship. I was her first boyfriend, and her first kiss, which she was extremely nervous for, so once we kissed I thought everything would turn around and that she would loose her shyness, the thing ruining our relationship. I didn't work, she and her friend started fighting and their fight was affecting out relationship. Spring break rolled around and I had only kissed her one day, on several occasions though, infact we made out. I was planning to hang out with her during spring break but she was out of town the whole time. The last weekend of spring break I was so exited to see her the following Monday. When I go to school I found out that her fight with her friend had gotten worse, they would even look a each other. That day I decided that I Was going to talk to her and either figure out why everything was going the way it was going or break up with her. Before I could do it I checked with my female friend and she had told me that my girlfriend had told her that she wasnt ready for a telationship and that she wanted it to end but she was to nervousness and shy to do it herself, so knowing that I ended it. I felt awful, I picked up smoking again that night and sat on my roof singing sad songs, what a movie cliche. Later people started saying that she just used me to get a first kiss and I was devastated because I thought she liked me. In a spiral of sadness I started smoking too much weed to feel happy again, which was fun while it lasted but now I'm broke. So I've been a sad, bitter, broke, lonely wreck. She seems like she moved on immediately, she's happy, and never regarded it, but I still feel empty inside because I don't know how to be happy again like I was before we got together. She said maybe she would be open to trying a relationship with me again next year but I can't hold on that long, even though I'm afraid I will and this silent sufference will last until then. Sigh... Where some weed when I need it.

MM

May 02, 2013 @ (POOP)

Tags: d12

That was a year ago.

I was driving, she was with me in the car. I didn't realize there was a dog crossing the street at that moment and I crash him at 100kmh. I stopped the car right away and we both went out. The dog was 10m behind so we went to check his condition (all in blood, could see part of his stomach out), she wanted me to bring him to vet but very obviously there was nothing to do, so i didn't... She left me for being "cold-hearted".

Gaia

May 02, 2013 @ (Berkeley Ca)

Tags: friendship

I met him in college. We had been through a lot with our exes but found someway to be there for each other. Our friendship started off innocent, we had no intention of being together, although i suspected we were both attracted to one another. But we were the best of friends, we spent every day together, talking, exploring, studying, struggling to eat on a broke college student's budget. He was my best friend and I could tell him any and everything. However things changed, one day when I was getting ready to head home for my sister's graduation he and I went to hang out and unexpectedly admitted our feelings for each other. I was so happy that day, i felt like flying. He told me he could imagine us being together in the future. So I went back to my hometown that night not knowing what was to happen between us but I was pleased and he was too. We gave each other butterflies and everything felt so new and fresh between us. I was in love with my best friend.
We never decided to be together, it would be too complicated for us to place a title on our feelings, he and I had just gotten out of our own relationships and thought it would be easier to hold off being together "officially" and just enjoy one another.
We experimented sexually and had a spiritual connection like no other. We had each other's back and spent every day together
But as time progressed, it became difficult for me to be stuck in uncertainty about where our relationship was headed. I began to feel insecure and jealous sometimes, in which I acknowledged and tried to solve by seeing the love in everything and everyone around us. I did not tell him about my jealousies and insecurities, because I knew those feelings were reflection of myself and my fears. However, he began to change... began pushing me away and becoming insensitive to how some of the things he did and said made me feel uncomfortable. I became sad all of the time and would cry and feel hurt.
Then one day we had a talk, I told him how I was feeling and he told me he had feelings for someone else. He was being 100% honest with me (which is a habit of ours) and also said that he did not want to go farther than just having a crush on another girl because he loved me.
Nevertheless, as the semester began to sweep me away to travelling around for work and school and family, he began to hang around the other girl more frequently in my absence. Then he told me that he told her about his feelings for him and she returned those feelings.
So I had enough. I broke things off with him, i told him that we should just be friends... I cant take feeling like this anymore. Regardless of how much we love each other. Its been an emotional roller coaster and I can't deal with it. I wish him joy and happiness and love and I hope he can figure out what he wants. Although thinking about this still makes my heart constrict and tears flood my eyes, i am moving forward. <3

Lonely Lifelong

April 08, 2013 @ (canada)

Tags: Lonely lifelong

This guy was with me for almost a year,but it doesn't matter to me how long or short,i loved him with all my heart and thats what matters,he was my first love and i cant express how much i loved him,what didnt i do for him....but i never asked for more then his love,all i needed was his love,but maybe he never did.

i begged him,pleaded him,but he never replied for anything,sometimes i think that the time we have been togather was a lie,we were never meant to be,i cant believe he did this to me,he has made me feel like the luckiest girl,and on the top of the universe,he made me believe he loved me like anything,but he never did,i wonder how could he do this to me?my only question is why?

Now i only have one of his most beautiful memories we shared,that reminds me of the times we had,our girl baby,she is the most beautiful thing i've seen,when we brokeup i didnt knw i was pregnant,after he left me i came to know and i was really happy,i tried to contect him,but he never listened,he doesn't even know that there is a baby,he even doesn't know where we are,i don't want him to know also,he betrayed me,cheated me.

The feeling of keeping the baby inside me was the most amazing,the way it grew,every second reminded me of him,i still do want him,really badly,lastweek my girly for the first time called dada,and tears filled my eyes,she is very alike to her father,those eyes,those soft lightbrown straight hair,she is only one and half,her small feets put little steps towards me,her every thing reminds me of him,and it makes me happy too.

i wish he would be happy,successfull,and he gets the love he wants,god bless him everyway,i loved him,love him,and will go on loving him forever,now my problem is my bestfriend wants me,but i never thought about loving anyone after him,its not that i didn't try,i did,but cant,i believe its better not to love than loving someone who'll never love you back,i feel as if you love soomeone you will pay for it your lifelong......

So though i am alone,its better to be alone,and live a lonelylife,the reason i am living only is for my babydaughter,she is my life,in my every breath she exists,nothing can harm her as long as i live,i have never let her even fall simply,i've kept her in my arms and looked after her,she is the reason i am,all i am is for her,and i will never let her go through what i went,i've promised this to my self since i knew she was within me.....

i love you my darling,my baby,my girl,my only princess...