Searching for "self-esteem"

4 Results For 'self-esteem'

Seriously?

January 21, 2012 @ (U.S.A.)

Tags: jerk, slut, whore, friend, drunk

I guess this one isn't even a break-up, but it was like one. A while back when I was single, there was this guy that I knew who was, to put it bluntly, the community whore. He made it his personal mission to sleep with everyone. I was in no way interested, but because we worked together we eventually did end up becoming friends, and would often see each other outside of work when co-workers got together for drinks. And then one night I had too much to drink and lo and behold, banged the company bicycle. I was pretty mortified with myself. I made him swear not to tell anyone about it--not only because I didn't want people to know I'd been that stupid, but also because it's not exactly kosher for that to go on between coworkers anywhere--and I made it crystal clear that it was never, never happening again. He felt the same--the man went through women like tissue paper, so he agreed without batting an eye.

So imagine how angry I was when I found out he told literally EVERYONE about it the next day. I tore him a new one--I brought that infantile jerk to tears. He swore he was sorry and after a few weeks of giving him a pointed cold shoulder, things sort of went back to normal and we became friends again--closer than before, oddly. He ranted to me about his conquests to bed other drunk and/or low-self-esteem suffering women and I would smile and nod. He kept bringing around whatever woman he was currently screwing and tried to get me to be friends with them, which I hated. I mean what am I supposed to say to her? It'll be nice knowing you for the next few days before he finds someone new? It was so awkward and I couldn't stand hearing them gush about whoever he was pretending to be while knowing he was just intending to toss them aside. He kept insisting "this one's different", like he was madly in love with each one, thus making it okay to love and leave them in his mind I guess.

Well, I started to hang out with him less and less. He was fun to be around sometimes but god could he be a twat. Then one day, after we'd been friends for about a year, I met someone I really liked and started dating him. Suddenly, this supposed friend was pissed. He was jealous and cold and ignored me whenever he could, ranting behind my back to other coworkers that the relationship was obviously no good. So apparently he was only ever keeping around female friends as people he thought he could potentially back-up bang. I had no clue that I was actually part of some sick, perceived harem. Now he claims that I "broke his heart" or some shit, when while we were FRIENDS, he was in relationships with dozens of others. It's such a lie; I know he never had feelings for me, he just wants attention. Such a crybaby, and I'm glad I finally have the sense to just ignore him from now on.

Shelliton

January 27, 2011 @ (Albuquerque)

Tags: crazy, controlling, delusional

Years ago, my best friend began dating a girl that he worked with. It started off okay, but after about a month she told him a sob story and he let her move in with him. That started four years of psychological torture. He found a better job, got a house for her, expensive furniture and electronics for her. She dictated his life - he would have to lie and sneak around to have lunch with me, a best friend from school days, like it was something naughty. She was constantly telling him how much she hated him and how worthless she thought he was. She began attempting to stab him - the first time was because he brought her breakfast in bed and forgot the orange juice. She would never let him be in a room by himself, then complain that he never let her have the life she wanted. She told him to propose, but he could never bring himself to buy the $10,000 ring she had to have. She would with-hold sex for months at a time and he never once cheated on her. She kicked him out of the house he was paying for thirteen times in the four years they were together and during the last time, she got back together with her meth addicted ex and he started rediscovering his balls.

At that point, he and I reconnected by starting to work out together again (he used to have the most fantastic set of abs, but his ex was a little overweight and would accuse him of working out just to make her feel bad about her body). She started constantly calling and texting him (he was still paying for her phone bill and gave her three months after the break up to get another phone set up before he shut it off), alternatively wishing him happiness and berating and belittling him. Once the phone got shut off, the e-mails started - angry and demanding money from him. We grew closer in this time and now, a little over a year after their break up, we've decided to get married. I'm not sure how she found out, but she sent him a very angry e-mail (after many e-mails saying she was happy he was dating me and wishing us well) accusing him of cheating on her with me and basically telling him that he should have made himself available as her backup plan. And yet, he still can't justify blocking her e-mails (he refuses to even consider giving her his new phone number, though). He still has the patience of a saint, though we're still working on rebuilding his self-esteem.

NoNeedToKnow

November 22, 2010 @ (France)

Tags: depression, self-esteem

I had this friend that was going through some stuff just like I was. Both him and I were very depressed and so we started talking with one another. One thing after another, we ended up dating.
He lived in another city, so we couldn't see each other much but we talked/emailed each other nonstop everyday. We both thought things were pretty serious. On our official first date, he told me that he loved me and we had our very first kiss. And of course, this is lame but I had felt something when he kissed me. The very next day, he told me on the phone that we had to breakup. His mother told him to not date me for my good. She was afraid that he'd hurt me. I was really torn and depressed but we continued being friends but "with benefits." So it basically still felt like we were still dating. We'd still talk on the phone whenever we could and he'd always tell me that he loves me and other romantic things.
........But then I find out ONLINE that he started going out with this girl WHILE he was still talking with me and saying all that sweet stuff. And to add to it, I found out two WEEKS after they were dating. I was so pissed off and torn that I yelled at him to never talk to me. AND he had the nerve to say that he'd breakup with her if I wanted him to. I didn't want to hurt the other girl and so I told him to do whatever he wanted. He broke up with her and I added her as a friend on ----------. She blabbed out everything to me and said that they were true loves and etc. Then she had the nerve to say that he never liked me in the first place and that he was just thinking that he had feelings for me but in reality, he was madly in love with her.
Things got worse when I wanted to get the truth from him but I couldn't get into contact with him at all. But luckily, I was best friends with his sister and she told me about some things that he told her when he was dating me. He didn't feel anything when we kissed and he felt like he was pressured into saying that he loves me. She did me a favor and did a 3-way phone call and I listened into their conversation. I know it was wrong to do so but it cleared everything up. I heard him say that I reminded him of her ex from 3 years ago and so thats why he dated me. I became depressed and sad from that point on.
There were moments where I thought to myself that I should hate him for everything but I couldn't bring myself to do that. I blamed myself for it. I blamed myself for not noticing that he cut the time we usually talk together down. I blamed myself and said to myself that I deserved it. Even now, I think how could a plain girl like me ever get a guy like him to like me....I eventually gave up and now I don't enjoy everyday life and feel like I have to drag myself to make it through the day...

NeedsHelp

September 12, 2010 @ (WestCoast)

Tags: Tags

My girlfriend of 9 years broke up with me to be with an old high school friend. The sad part is that I have a feeling that they will eventually get married within the next year or so. I’m absolutely crushed like never before. We’ve had our share of problems throughout our relationship and unfortunately it’s mostly my fault. I feel so stupid for taking her for granted.

We met in college back in 2001 and it started out as the most beautiful thing in this world that either of experienced. We were soul mates and were certain that we’d be together forever. It was like we were two peas in a pod, amongst a campus full of strangers and were very happy we found one another. It didn’t take us but 6 months to move in together we were so in love. However, after graduating college, I struggled for years, and was depressed even, to find a job. She supported us for most of our relationship as she was blessed with a wonderful career as an exceptional community organizer, which she now serves as the executive director of her organization. Me on the other hand, struggled immensely to find my passion, and had several dead end low paying jobs.. This was emotionally hard on me, and most certainly on her. However, we would make the best of our situation by taking various trips around the country and enjoying the natural bond we had for one another. We didn’t have to take trips really we enjoyed staying home together, whether we were intimately conversing about any topic or making passionate love. However, my career struggles took a severe toll on our relationship. I even went through a period of alcohol abuse, which lasted a couple of years. Eventually, after 4 great years she began to loose interest in me, and cheated on me a few times. Although I was obviously crushed, I took her back because I loved her so so much and believed we could work through anything, plus I always envisioned her as the mother of my kids. Fast forward to January 2008, I eventually found a job which pays great and I absolutely love-- finally I’m able to support us and feel good about myself in that regard. We celebrated the entire 2008 in the name of my success and life seemed golden--finally my career struggle was over! Unfortunately I started to drink again and lied several times about it and thus undermining any trust left. At that time, she started to give me warnings that I had to stop or else she’d leave. Fortunately I finally stopped, but we would still argue. She also began to voice, starting in mid-June of this year, that she was growing unsatisfied in our relationship and that we needed to talk. I unfortunately kept prolonging “the talk” and became slightly tuned out every time she said it. Beginning of August I noticed she started to act suspect: she seemed to pay more attention to sending text messages on her smart phone than being in my company. So, I naturally had a hunch something was wrong, so I checked her work email and noticed she made reservations at hotel to be with some random guy, the weekend I was going out of town visit college friends in LasVegas. To make a long painful story short, I confronted her about it over the phone while she was at work, she became shell-shocked that I found out and started crying. We hang up and she eventually came home from work. The first thing she said was we should break up… and that I should‘ve talked to her but now it‘s too late we have to break up. I’m begging and pleading for her to get her to change her mind, and that we should talk now, but she insisted we should break up. The next day I go to work, come back home and she’s gone. I call her and she said we shouldn’t be around each other anymore and one of us needs to move out. Now I’m in further disbelief and shock. What follows after that is even more painful drama, trauma rather, and would take another 500 words or so to explain but I‘ll save the detail--it’s bad.. In short, she’s been at a friends house for the past 3 weeks looking for a place and blocked my number from her cell phone, it turns out this random guy is an old high school friend and they are in a intimate partnership. She even hinted that they are talking about marriage. Meanwhile I’ve been alone in our old apartment reminiscing, broken-hearted but refusing to let go, looking at old pictures and her belongings, under an unbearable amount of sorrow, loss of appetite and motivation, deteriorating self-esteem and ego. I’ve been reading passages from Psalms to make it through the day. My life feels like it’s over.