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Ashes

August 11, 2010 @ (Canada)

Tags: sad, depressing


My boyfriend (now ex) started dating in my first year of highschool. It was one of those highschool relationships that you see on the movies, and who every teenage girl hopes to have. We were together all through out highschool. He was so in love with me. Honestly, Im pretty sure I could of gotten away with anything and he would always come back to me. A lot of it had to do with the fact that we were eachothers first time and lust/love was being thrown around together. But at the end of the day we really did love eachother and we had something that some people will never ever experience. We were best friends. We knew every single thing about eachother. It was a relationship where I could take a crap infront of him and that wasnt a problem at all! haha! at one point he even moved away for half a year and still we some how made it work. But then, oh i forgot to mention he is a year older than me! anyways, he started university and I was in my last year of highschool. Thats when everything changed. We had always had our problems. his was honesty issues, mine where anger issues. But once he moved on, it was like we were completley different people! I know... if any of you are reading this you are probably thinking my story is pretty boring. he never cheated on me with my sister, or i never left him at the alter. We were just two regular people who were at one moment so in love... to not even knowing who eachother were. I guess im writing this because im so depressed and bitter with the reality of relationships and life in General. We ended up breaking up because our lives and our relationships became so routine. We new that we loved eachother but we were stuck making time to see eachother to make love with one another, to make sure we set enough time to have a phone conversation once a day, made sure we sent eachother at least 10 txts a day to make sure our days were going alright. It was horrible and I was unhappy, and because I was unhappy we fought... all the time. So those "dates" turned into a boxing ring. So eventually I had to end it. that was about around last christmas. I didnt blame him, nor did I blame myself. I blamed our situation. He was in Univserity and leading a completley different life than me, I was enjoying my last year of highschool. But since we broke up, I have had a few flings, slepted with a random, tried to pretend that those guys could at some point mean something to me, but at the end of the day, it was always him, and I feel as if it will ALWAYS be him. But again, it hurts me so much to see how things change... it wasnt supposed to turn out this way. I am now moving to Europe in a few weeks for a year, he has a new girlfriend( who is horrible) and we went from being so happy and to not being able imagine our selves without eachother, to leading completley different lives without eachother in them. Am I still in love with him- Yes. most definatley... if he magicaly asked me to be with him again would i say yes-No. Definatly not. I wish i could of met him in 5 years.. thats what i always told him. I wish we met in a different life where we could be with eachother and love eachother completley without having such barriers set up between us, masking the love we had for eachother. I cry at night, i miss him every night. I dont want to leave without him touching me, kissing me, looking me in te eyes one last time. But i know thats not possible. i want him to be able to move on, all i want is for him to be happy. He deserves it.


       

Alex

August 03, 2010 @ (Atlanta, GA)

Tags: Parent Interference


Sometimes when you try too hard, you end up destroying everything.

Early last month, I had traveled to Germany to visit my girlfriend that had just completed a semester studying abroad in China. Her family has a home in Germany, and I was invited to fly over and have my long-awaited reunion with her. While my heart was joyful to have her in my arms again, I was about to face unprecedented circumstances ultimately leading to our relationship's demise.

For the first four days in Germany, the food was completely not agreeing with my stomach, causing much discomfort. Instead of complaining about her mother's cooking, I tried my best to eat what I could and be respectful. If the ordeal ended there, it would have been no big deal. Then Sunday's emergency hit.

Her family and I traveled by bike to a neighboring village to watch a parade. Unknowingly, I experienced the most emasculating injury possible while in route. Thirty minutes into the parade, I started to experience pain in my "manhood area." After excusing myself from the group, I went into a local bar, ordered a drink and went to the bathroom to find an unprecedented swelling of one of my testicles. (Thank God for anonymity, because naturally this is a truly embarrassing moment.) After this discovery, I exited the bathroom, quickly consumed my drink and swiftly exited back to the street. I told my girlfriend I immediately needed to get to the hospital, and word started to spread among the family. Without any option for a taxi or ambulance, we were forced to ride by bicycle to the hospital. Upon arrival, I was laid out in an examination room with my girlfriend and her mother standing at the end of the table, with my full injury on display. This was necessary, as I do not speak German and needed translation. I was diagnosed with Testicular Torsion and required immediate surgery. The procedure was a success, and I departed the hospital the following day to return to the family's house.

Back in their house, I was laid out in pain, recovering from my procedure. During this time, the whole family was working on renovating the bottom floor of the house. I felt guilty that I could not assist in their efforts, and isolated myself in discomfort. After 4 days being distant in their home, I was able to get on a flight back to America to see my English-speaking Doctor. My girlfriend would stay behind with the intention of traveling back the following week. We were on the verge of having a normal relationship, once again, after being separated for 5 months.

Then I inadvertently screwed up with her parents. The day following my arrival back to America, I wrote her parents an email attempting to explain my bad behavior during my stay in Germany. I thanked them for their hospitality, and humbled myself to any criticism they may have possessed. This letter was taken as an attack, and I received a reply 3 days later criticizing me for being snide and lacking self-confidence. They trivialized my relationship with their daughter and made the determination that I was not good enough to be with her. Thirty minutes later, and just one week after my medical emergency, my girlfriend broke up with me over Skype.

Instead of traveling back to America, she has stayed in Germany for another two weeks. She has only listened to her parents about their limited view of my conduct. She will not talk to me and will not stand up for the love we genuinely found together.

She returns to America tomorrow, from my understanding. I'm not going to harass her, but I'm truly devastated to have lost her. Hopefully her friends will help her form her own opinion of things.

If you've read this far, thank you. I felt compelled to write the whole background as I'm so very confused by these circumstances. There is no take-away lesson from this experience, and that almost makes it harder to recover from and rationalize.


       

John L.

July 25, 2010 @ (Orlando)

Tags: Why does this happpen


I have posted my story and it was the first time I ever had something like this happen.

My question after reading other peoples stories is this.

While everyone says move on thats all you can do. Others try to take revenge but my question is why?

Why do people of today treat people with such little respect. Sex is seen as nothing more than a social event when that is never what it was designed for. It was meant for marriage.

Look at all the media around you (sex sells) look at we as a people and what we are becoming. People are so selfish that they forget that the one thing you do is put the other individual above yourselves.

We are all here because the person we thought we could trust, believe in, give our lives to, want to be with for the rest of our lives, etc. Left or broke us. How many of us have done this to others. Yes many times it's better that we split (abusive or harmful) but at the same time its become normal to break people's hearts and souls and in some cases we still don't know why the other did it.

I am challenging all of you since you have gone through a breakup to stop and think. Don't just jump into bed. Look at the person in the face and ask is this the woman or man I can spend my life with. Waking up to their face every morning and never getting tired of it.

Don't let your emotions run your life. Stop the cycle that the world has said is normal. Stop having sex just because it feels good. Or you are lonely. Grow up and set an example for others to follow.


       

JoLeigh

July 20, 2010 @ (Tennessee)

Tags: JoLeigh


My Boyfriend and Me were together for 7 months when it all started. He found out his Uncle (which was like his dad) had cancer. I was ALWAYS there for him, and ALWAYS tried to make him feel better. I sat in the hospital with him a couple of times, to try to make him feel better. He starting acting different around me when all this happend, He was alot more mean & starting acting like he didnt care anymore. I kept telling him how he was hurting my feelings but the fighting continued. At the first of July everything starting going down hill. We fought everyday. I always trie telling him how i felt but he never listened to me. One night around the usual time he calls me He said he wasnt going to call because he was watching a movie. I just asked him If a movie was more important than me? and he said I get mad over the littest things. All I wanted was to talk to my boyfriend? The next night, I texted him and asked him if he was getting tired of me? And he said I dont know, I just need time. So that scared me and I called him. Well apparently he didnt have enough respect for me to go somewhere private so we could talk about this. Because all I could hear in the back ground was people talking & he was saying was Idk Idk Idk to every question I asked. That night I decided to ignore him for the rest of the night & the next few days, hopeing that would make him realize how much he had hurt my feelings. But that was a horrible mistake because all he did was get more pissed at me over it. I finally broke down and texted him a few days after this and all he texted back was," You know we are not dating anymore, Right?" That broke my heart. I called him and we talked for 1 hour & a half. He wanted to take a 2 week break from our relationship because he was so "stressed" & needed time to think. So I was like Okay maybe this will Help out relationship. We went 2 days without talking and i was miserable. I missed him so much. A couple of more days went by and I found out from some of our friends he had been "talking" to another girl. And he denyed it when I asked him. & even his sister said he liked her & they were talking. I told him I was done and I wanted all my stuff back from him. 2 weeks went by, and We havent talked. He has left picture comments on that girls pictures, and ive seen them. Lastnight I broke down and asked him,"Honestly do you miss me?" All he wrote back was, " Kinda, but no not really." I was crying so hard I had a panic attack. Now here I am, Alone. I try to talk to other boys but all they do is remind me of him. I cry everytime Im not with someone being occupied. I miss him ALOT, & knowing im not good enough for him to love me forver like he promised kills me every second. Im depressed & not happy anymore. Ive always been a happy person but I cant even smile anymore. Next monday we would have been together 9 months, I still feel like texting him and saying Happy 9 month Anniversary sweetheart, I love you with all my heart, but i know I cant. God makes everything happen for a reason but i dont feel that this is a blessing or to make things better. Maybe one day someone will bring back the smile on my face.


       

Ben

July 19, 2010 @ (pueblo)

Tags: the dumbest fucking bitch


So.... here goes I dated my ex for four years and she considers it five things were good the first 3 years untill I decide to tell her that I cheated on her in the begining but things were all wrong when we got together I just left a horrid rfelationship and needed time to move on so dumbass me decides to give it a try. So many things happened the last three years I can't explain cause it hurts just to even open up but a lot of stupid completely ingorant things happened with us I'm glad to have finished things off the only real tradgety is we have a child who is one and a half and can't see her much cause the damn bitch chooses to harass me for instance I work seven days a week by chioce cause I really need the money so I'm out of town on the job and the bitch calls me telling me what a piece of shit and all the names from the emergancy room only stating my daughters in there but won't say why this continues for two days none stop calling me this calling me that but still nots wrong with my one year old daughter so the last call I get is she is being transported due to trauma injuries now I leave my job without saying I get there and she is there with a guy she just started seeing and is imoblized in front of him (bet he didn't know she was harassing) I go see the dr. Says she's fine and is going home in a couple hours. Now what kind of cunt of a mom tells u that your a piece of shit and not what's wrong with your daughter would u go to the emergancy room with a raging cunt cussing u out instead of saying your daughter is hurt and needs u? wtf


       

Ann

July 09, 2010 @ (Washington)

Tags: stalker, engaged


I met my ex through a woman that I worked with (Who, in retrospect, turned out to be as much of a nutcase as my ex). So my ex and I fall "in love" and after about a year of dating, we're engaged.

At this point my soon-to-be husband had been living in the dorms on the military base an hour a way from my home. He promises that he would make the commute a little easier and move closer- even just a little(He doesn't have a car so I'm doing all the driving). So the time comes for him to find a new apartment and I find out that he completely disregards his originally promise and moves about 25 minutes the other direction. Great. We get into a fight, he tells me it's over. I spend the night miserable. The next morning I call him and we work out our issues- he then proceeds to tell me that he got mad at me and "closed" our wedding account (That he hadn't contributed a penny to) and that he left the money at the bank. Of course I find out later that he actually spent it in one night on god knows what. Like an idiot I forgive him and we continue to date....
Nine months later I drive to his apartment (still an hour and 25 minutes away) with red velvet cupcakes and plans for a romantic evening. I help myself in, he's cleaning the bathroom. I give him a big hug... and right as were having this nice moment I see the words "I want my first child to be yours." as an incoming test message. Long story short- He had been cheating on me with this chick for a while. I left heartbroken. The next week I get a death threat from the girl he cheated on me with telling me to leave him alone. I write her off as being crazy but call my ex to talk to him about it. We're talking again anf of course he says he loves me. A couple days later he "loses" his phone and is calling me from a friend's phone to tell me how he wants to work our relationship out and that he needs me. A week later I get a call from his family telling me that he was getting a restraining order against me for stalking him (really long drive to stalk someone), that he changed his number because he was afraid for his safety and that I was crazy. Two weeks later and totally not stalking him- I'm posting lovely new pictures of me and my new love interest. It's a win-win, I found someone better and he'll never have to worry about me "stalking" him again.


       

Emma

July 01, 2010 @ (arizona)

Tags: example1


My boyfriend and I had been together 9 months. We'd known each other and been really in love for almost 2 years. I gave him absolutely all of me. We really were great together and always had fun and showed each other how much we were in love. He always told me how he wanted to marry me and how much he loved me. Everything was going great until one week he had phone issues. He never tried to contact me in any way. When he did get his phone back, he still didn't at least text me and say he'd call me later or anything. So after going from speaking everyday or just getting an "i love you" text from him, which was always enough for me and made me feel so amazing, he went to zero communication. Who wouldn't "freak out"? I tried contacting him and got nothing. Anyway, I went to see what was going on and he told me he wanted a break and started naming off all these silly previous fights that he had already apologized for and I had forgiven and moved on. He said how I ask too much of him, which he lives 2 hours away, and he had always been able to find time to call me or just text me each day, and if a day or two went by, I was okay with that because I do know how busy he really is. Anyway, after saying all that I had finally agreed to a break. I asked if he wanted to break up and he said no, just a break for a few weeks because he didn't have time for this.
A month has gone by and I had tried to contact him out of desperation for answers the first two weeks. I have not tried to contact him for the past 2 weeks and I will not. I sent him a pour my heart out, this is what really happened with all the silly fights, and do you really love me if you're throwing away what we had...and still heard no word.
It's the most painful thing in the world to go from "i love you I want to marry you baby" to not acknowledging my existence. We are both 21, so yes I know we're young, but he had been so genuine and he doesn't sugar coat anything, so I know if he didn't love me, he would have just said so...
I've been suffering from panic attacks my whole life, but had not had an issue with them again until all of this happened. It feels as if my world crashed down. I live alone, I'm in a new state where all I have is a job so this makes things even more difficult. I do have hobbies, but cannot pursue riding horses at this time because I live in an apartment and can't afford to board a horse in town.
I wake up every morning thinking about every good and horrible thing we've gone through. After what he's done to me, I hate him, but I love him at the same time. My heart races, my stomach turns, I feel nauseous all day long and cannot eat like I used to.
I tried not making him my whole life, but I guess I felt what we had was so real, I never had to worry about him not being there. This all makes me sound pathetic, I know it does and I hate feeling this weak.
How can you love someone so much one day, and want nothing to do with them the next? And no, nothing changed. He changed. I know there isn't anotherr girl because his roommate wants to date me and I'm sure to get me to date him, he would tell me if there was another girl.
So now what? How can I get over this? I've bought books about breakups that have helped me on the whole outlook of this about how if we were so perfect, this wouldn't have happened.
But still...
anyone have any words of advice or encouragement? Anything would help. Sorry this was so long.


       

Number4

June 28, 2010 @ (uk)

Tags: cheating, bastard


My ex and I have known each other since we were 5. We were best friends from the age of 14 and dated briefly when we were 15- He chased me and I caved. Two weeks later he dumped me for his ex, who was two years older. Kids stuff, i soon forgave him; wasn't that into him anyway.
When we were 18 and at University we would visit each other on the weekends. One time i went to stay with him for a weekend and didnt return to the city i was studying in for a week. We quickly fell in love, into the 'honeymoon period' and committed to a years long-distance relationship, seeing each other once a month. We moved in together the next year when we both graduated. Seven years down the line, we'd had our fair share of knocks but were always a team- we still had our strong group of friends from high school and managed to maintain our individual interests and own lives as well as having a great time together. To everyone outside; we were the perfect couple. I thought so. Being a smug prick never serves you well; remember that.

My grandfather died in June 09', followed by 3 extended family deaths and the death of my other grandfather in the September. I was a bit of a wreck. In December 09', my ex asked me to marry him. It was very romantic and i was the happiest i'd been in my life. I started the wedding plans right away.. but a little scared. He was pushing the wedding stuff and wanted it to be small, no fuss and sooner rather than later. I charged on with the purchases and booking the venues etc.

In April 10' he sat me down and told be he'd been seeing a girl from his office for two months. He said that he 'loved' me but he wasnt 'in love' with me. Seems he'd 'loved me' enough to want to get married in a fu*king rush in the December but by the February had decided it wasnt what he wanted. Trouble is, my ex is a sap who can't function alone- so he'd spent two months making sure the girl was interested enough and setting himself up a nice little back up plan before filling me in on the fact my world was about to be smashed to bits. To add an extra kick in the teeth; he'd told of his cheating bastard ways to three (3) of our mutual friends before one of them made him come to me with it. I threw him out, but there was no fight from him. He'd already made the desicion to go.

Two months on and i'm starting from scratch. He went straight into a relationship with the office tart (who signed my engagement card 'wishing you both all the happiness in the world' by the way). Pair of fu*kers.


       

Lisa

June 22, 2010 @ (arkansas)

Tags: love sucks dont it


So when i was a freshman i fell for the senior soccer star. He was gorgeous goood grades great smile, family guy and all around PERFECT. i obviously was smitten but ha so was his gf of a year. he failed to mention this everytime we hung out everytime we talked and when i brought it up he said that she just couldnt get over him, it was quite sad. the saddest part was he was my first and after we got done she called him and left a voicemail saying baby when your done mowing the lawn call me, i grabbed my clothes and bolted out of there. he tried calling texting everything for almost a month finally i gave in and he said that he didnt know if i really loved him and thats why he stayed with her. LAME right,then he tells me how hes leaving for college and when he gets back were hanging haa he never left, ya i sall pictures on fb of a party in the town we live in he denied them saying they were before he left. THen his still gf posts saying how she loves her marine boyfriend and thinks little girls need to get over him. well needless to say we got into it just to find out that he told her i was obsessed and that i wouldnt leave him alone, so i told her what i knew but she said that i was lying. ha they broke up not that long after and he got with another one of my friends.
he still trys to talk to me but funny thing is now looking back at it i wish i had given myself to someone who respected people more


       

Carol

June 20, 2010 @ (Wisconsin)

Tags: Carol


We were together for 15 months before I finaly broke up with him. When we started going out (I asked him out)he really loved me, he cared, and he treated me right. But after a half of a year he started to change in a bad way. He would choose to play a video game over me. And he would be up all night with his friends and go home and sleep the whole afternoon, so I never could get a hold of him. And so we had about 15 break ups withen the the next few months. I always forgave him and gave him another chance. But then, he would ignore my calls and he would never text me back even though I would leave him a couple of voice messages. And some nights I would call him over 50 times cuz I was worried about him or where he was, but later, I would find out that he was over at his friends house. And he knew that he wasn't doing his part of the relationship. So I was feeling very unappreichated. Not only that but we would always argue and he treated every girl that crossed his path as if they were princesses. I did so much for him, everyday at school, I would buy him his lunch cuz he didn't have the money. I paied for every movies ticket. I even paid for everytime we went out to eat. I loved him so much. I tried so hard for him.I gave him space. I cried out my eyes for him. I went broke cuz of him. I am hated by the people who use to love me cuz of him(cuz every one I knew hated him). I changed my whole life for him. But he took me for granted, so I did what he deserved, cuz I know I deserve better. I bumped his a**.

I didn't want money or a car. I just wanted to be loved for who I am.