Searching for "trust"

101 Results For 'trust'

NeedsHelp

September 12, 2010 @ (WestCoast)

Tags: Tags

My girlfriend of 9 years broke up with me to be with an old high school friend. The sad part is that I have a feeling that they will eventually get married within the next year or so. I’m absolutely crushed like never before. We’ve had our share of problems throughout our relationship and unfortunately it’s mostly my fault. I feel so stupid for taking her for granted.

We met in college back in 2001 and it started out as the most beautiful thing in this world that either of experienced. We were soul mates and were certain that we’d be together forever. It was like we were two peas in a pod, amongst a campus full of strangers and were very happy we found one another. It didn’t take us but 6 months to move in together we were so in love. However, after graduating college, I struggled for years, and was depressed even, to find a job. She supported us for most of our relationship as she was blessed with a wonderful career as an exceptional community organizer, which she now serves as the executive director of her organization. Me on the other hand, struggled immensely to find my passion, and had several dead end low paying jobs.. This was emotionally hard on me, and most certainly on her. However, we would make the best of our situation by taking various trips around the country and enjoying the natural bond we had for one another. We didn’t have to take trips really we enjoyed staying home together, whether we were intimately conversing about any topic or making passionate love. However, my career struggles took a severe toll on our relationship. I even went through a period of alcohol abuse, which lasted a couple of years. Eventually, after 4 great years she began to loose interest in me, and cheated on me a few times. Although I was obviously crushed, I took her back because I loved her so so much and believed we could work through anything, plus I always envisioned her as the mother of my kids. Fast forward to January 2008, I eventually found a job which pays great and I absolutely love-- finally I’m able to support us and feel good about myself in that regard. We celebrated the entire 2008 in the name of my success and life seemed golden--finally my career struggle was over! Unfortunately I started to drink again and lied several times about it and thus undermining any trust left. At that time, she started to give me warnings that I had to stop or else she’d leave. Fortunately I finally stopped, but we would still argue. She also began to voice, starting in mid-June of this year, that she was growing unsatisfied in our relationship and that we needed to talk. I unfortunately kept prolonging “the talk” and became slightly tuned out every time she said it. Beginning of August I noticed she started to act suspect: she seemed to pay more attention to sending text messages on her smart phone than being in my company. So, I naturally had a hunch something was wrong, so I checked her work email and noticed she made reservations at hotel to be with some random guy, the weekend I was going out of town visit college friends in LasVegas. To make a long painful story short, I confronted her about it over the phone while she was at work, she became shell-shocked that I found out and started crying. We hang up and she eventually came home from work. The first thing she said was we should break up… and that I should‘ve talked to her but now it‘s too late we have to break up. I’m begging and pleading for her to get her to change her mind, and that we should talk now, but she insisted we should break up. The next day I go to work, come back home and she’s gone. I call her and she said we shouldn’t be around each other anymore and one of us needs to move out. Now I’m in further disbelief and shock. What follows after that is even more painful drama, trauma rather, and would take another 500 words or so to explain but I‘ll save the detail--it’s bad.. In short, she’s been at a friends house for the past 3 weeks looking for a place and blocked my number from her cell phone, it turns out this random guy is an old high school friend and they are in a intimate partnership. She even hinted that they are talking about marriage. Meanwhile I’ve been alone in our old apartment reminiscing, broken-hearted but refusing to let go, looking at old pictures and her belongings, under an unbearable amount of sorrow, loss of appetite and motivation, deteriorating self-esteem and ego. I’ve been reading passages from Psalms to make it through the day. My life feels like it’s over.

John L.

July 25, 2010 @ (Orlando)

Tags: Why does this happpen

I have posted my story and it was the first time I ever had something like this happen.

My question after reading other peoples stories is this.

While everyone says move on thats all you can do. Others try to take revenge but my question is why?

Why do people of today treat people with such little respect. Sex is seen as nothing more than a social event when that is never what it was designed for. It was meant for marriage.

Look at all the media around you (sex sells) look at we as a people and what we are becoming. People are so selfish that they forget that the one thing you do is put the other individual above yourselves.

We are all here because the person we thought we could trust, believe in, give our lives to, want to be with for the rest of our lives, etc. Left or broke us. How many of us have done this to others. Yes many times it's better that we split (abusive or harmful) but at the same time its become normal to break people's hearts and souls and in some cases we still don't know why the other did it.

I am challenging all of you since you have gone through a breakup to stop and think. Don't just jump into bed. Look at the person in the face and ask is this the woman or man I can spend my life with. Waking up to their face every morning and never getting tired of it.

Don't let your emotions run your life. Stop the cycle that the world has said is normal. Stop having sex just because it feels good. Or you are lonely. Grow up and set an example for others to follow.

Broken Hearted

March 14, 2010 @ (California)

Tags: Craigslist, cheating

I was with my boyfriend for a year when one morning I wake up and check my e-mail to find his ex had emailed me. She lives in France now and we are here in the states. The e-mail stated that they had been exchanging e-mails for 6 months and that they were going to get together the next time she was here (which was the week I got the email). She also says that he still loves her and wants to be with her. I confronted him and he acted very confused by the whole situation. He still proclaims that he never spoke with her while we were together. Anyways, this led me to not trust him so I started lurking on his e-mail where I find that he has been replying to casual encounters on craigslist and even posted a No strings attached ad. I confronted him with this and he said it was because he got bored one night and was just messing with the people on craigslist. I tried for 4 months to get over everything that happened. My gut told me he was lying, but he is a great guy and I love him so much. This morning I woke up to find pictures of some ugly fat girl in his email and another response to a craigslist ad. I decided that I couldn't take it anymore so I got dressed and drove to his house. I sat outside debating whether or not to wake him up and break it off. Which I did. He cried and says he doesn't want to lose me. He still says that he didn't cheat on me and that he never talked to his ex, but I've never been the person to be so sad and depressed as I am now. I broke up with him today because I need to remember who I used to be before him. He was my first boyfriend and this is the exact reason why I stayed single for 20 years. He was an amazing boyfriend and I just don't understand why he did this to me or what I did to deserve this. I don't know where to go from here.

TinkerBell

February 03, 2010 @ (Oregon)

Tags: 1st love

When I was in high school there was this guy that liked me and I could not stand him. He asked me out multiple times and I said no. I then moved away and never saw him again but did think about him. About a year after I graduated I found him on myspace and we met up for coffee and it was love at first site. He had matured (so I thought) and was super cute. We started dating and where engaged. He told me how much he loved me and would never leave me and how beautiful I was. He broke up with me after 5 months ( that seemed like a year ) he didnt even give me much of a reason other then he needed space and a couple areas we just both needed to work on to make this work. Long story short I found out that he had started spreading rumors about me to my friends while I was gone to college. I also found out that the reason he broke up with me was for my best friend who he had been cheating on me with. I got over him a little faster but after dating a 2nd guy )who dated me to make his ex jealous) I miss him alot. I moved home and am going to a new school soon and there are so many memories of us. He was my first everything, kiss, love, he took my verginaty. I miss the fun times we had and the friends I had till he destroyed that for me. I am still trying to get back on my feet but I have a hard time trusting anyone now.

Sheena

January 18, 2010 @ (davao city, philippines)

Tags: 1

i gt a relationship way back in march 10,2008.. i fell in love with a guy..im so happy whenever we are together.i just dont know if he truly loves me but he always tell me that he loves me.the only thing is that i don't trust him.every time he don't text me i easily got angry it is because we don't see often hats why i want him to text me..we always broke up but we patch things up again..but until the time came that he told me he don't love me anymore. that was april 23,2009..it really hurts me.and i got a news that he had a new girlfriend.now we are 9 months broke-up.and i heard a news about him that he is going to marry his new gf because her girlfriend got pregnant and im so hurt

Jeff

December 21, 2009 @ (Pennsylvania)

Tags: question

Okay, so here's the story. I just started dating this girl. She lives in Ohio, i'm in Pennsylvania. Well we were talking on web cam tonight and suddenly another guys voice comes on and says "can you hear me" she said yes directly after. I asked who that was and the cam coincidentally shut off at that point. She said it wasn't another guy when I asked her about it. I'm not sure if i'm just not trusting because of the shit I just came out of recently or if I should believe her. What do you guys think?

Joe N

December 15, 2009 @ (Visalia)

Tags: etc

So I dated this chick for a little over 3 years, and I actually had thought that she was the one. Well in August of this year, I had found out that she had slept with my band mate about 2 years ago (before the band had formed). I may have been able to forgive it, being so long ago, but I had suspected that she cheated on me with him and had asked her several times over the years. She would always get upset with me (as would I if I was falsely accused) so I dropped it and went along with it because I trusted her. Finally, when I found out for sure, she admitted the whole thing, and we broke up. The band ended, and so did my friendship with my drummer. All he could say was that we weren't that close before the band started, and all she could say was that she was sorry and that she was stupid for doing the whole thing. I know I should just move on and forget about these people, but my gut is telling me to tell drummerboys girlfriend who he's been dating for 6 years about the whole thing, and hook up with her. Any thoughts?

Time-Filler

November 11, 2009 @ (East Coast)

Tags: dumped, ex, time filler

I used to be shy around guys (I was messed up with commitment and trust issues). Usually a guy would give up pursuing me cause I would always push them away. One time this guy didn't give up so I thought I would give it a chance. I mean, I can't be alone forever! So we start hanging out and he tell everyone we are dating and it is serious. News to me. After after about 3 months he has a work party that I am not allowed to go to. He told me a month in advance so I didn't really care. Then I find out his ex (who he used to work with) will be there. A few days later he breaks up with me claiming that I made him feel guilty for talking to his ex. First of all, I'm not sure how i did that because I never complained or anything. So I tell him maybe he is still in love with her. He tells me "no" and then proceeds to recite a laundry list of everything that was wrong with me. He got back with his ex and they have been together for a year. I'm just pissed he didn't have the balls to tell me the truth! I wasn't that into him anyway. But I did feel like I was a time-filler until his ex was done having her "fun" an wanted him back. That wasn't the best feeling in the world.

Some1

October 13, 2009 @ (don't matter)

Tags: broken heart, lost love

There was this girl. I had known her for years and years. I met her in 5th grade and ever since then we became friends. We wouldn't talk much but we'd always have something to say to each other. We grew up...her becoming gorgeous day by day and me realizing how much this girl knows me. We'd literally sit for hours talking about our lives and our beliefs. She had a cold outside, but inside she was warm and sweet as sugar. She went out with my best friend at one time and I didn't mind. I always felt she would come back to me. So I waited. 2 long years I waited until finally all those times of going to her house to have sandwiches got to me, all those times of sitting in class cracking on everyone else got to me, all those times of hanging out and generally loving each others presence got to me......I fell in love...or so I thought. I felt perfect. Everything was right. Just being in her presence took away all my demons, my frustrations, my unwavering pathetically insignificant life. I felt like a person in front of her. Like I mattered. I fell in love with my dream girl.

But then things got different. She went to college and hooked up wit some dude...She swore it was a mistake and that it was the first time she had gotten drunk. My dumbass believed her. Why? Because I believe in HER and ME...together. I told her we'd work through this. A couple months later, she told me she had to break it off because her parents didn't approve of me even though they had known me my entire life. They thought I was unpredictable and was going no where in life just because I wasn't becoming a doctor. She told me her parents didn't approve and I believed her. We broke up and God did it fuckin hurt. I couldn't talk to her, email her, nothing. She said her parents knew about us and were making sure I didn't call her. I lost touch with her. My best friend told me he went to go see her to console her because he knew we were both going through a hard time. He came to my place afterwards and TO MY FACE told me that nothing happened. After that, I went to India.

When I came back, I lost my soul, my heart, and my general appreciation for love. My best friend, who has known me just as long as she did, tells me that the day he went to go see her...something did happen. I was a broken man. In one swift move, I lost any connection to my love and my true friend. I cursed her for breaking my heart and for doing something this cruel. As for my best friend, I forgave him with my brain but not my heart. Both of them hurt me in ways I didn't know humans could be hurt. I had done no harm to any of them. I showed them love when everyone else showed hate.

The story goes on. My best friend went on...back to his old girlfriend. She forgave him and they moved on. And for her...she has a new boyfriend. A douche. Some fuck who will probably end up worse off.

My entire perception of people changed that day. I don't know if I should put more trust in strangers or in friends. At least strangers won't lead you on when they fuck your shit up.

I'll admit. I had my faults. Maybe I was going too fast with it and I jumped into things. but I truly felt this was it. My dumbass never felt so stupid in my entire life. I should've calmed down and played it slowly. She told me it wasn't gonna work, but I told her we'd make it work. I just never knew I was the only one workin at it.

I've had so much shit hit me in my life. Car accidents, fist fights, fights at home, fights with friends, broken bones, shattered eyes, surgeries, deaths, fires, rejection, loneliness, isolation...and yet. the only thing that ever REALLY hurts me...is a broken heart.

Dana

October 13, 2009 @ (Colorado)

Tags: asshole

So I start dating this guy for about 2 years but I should have known better because my friends and family kept telling me he was a jerk and I should have known better because he told me not to love me after we had sex the first time but anyhow we were dating for a year when he went out with his girl friends which I knew who had the hots for him (they were too obvious) and he ended up making out with both of them that night. I should have broke up with him right! nope was stupid. I did broke up with him a couple of weeks before my birthday but a couple of weeks later after I had slept with another guy he wanted me back, begging and telling me how he would be different this time. Moved with him to another state and stayed another year which is another stupid move. Then he got reunited with a high school friend and I should have known because well they were hanging out a lot and he picked her up a lot but I wanted to trust him. Finally I wanted to end it even though I didn't want to so I send him an email so we can talk about it when I get home. So when we did talk about it you know what he told me, that he's been wanting to break up but he wanted me to finish the semester to spare my feelings. Asshole but that's not the worst part. A couple of days after I broke down and call my mother and told her I wanted go back home you know what he told me "Are you done crying", know what I did, I punched him in the nose a couple of hours after when he was sitting in his computer playing world of warcraft. Never regretted it and I am so glad I punch his ass because it was unexpected and I hurt him good that he slept upstairs because he was scared of me. He is still single not surprising, I'm not and about to get married next year, boy do karma works.