Tags: love, detachment
We were old school friends and had been, in those days, pretty close. Not long after I got out of my last relationship, he called me up out of the blue (we had kind of drifted apart) and asked me out. I had had the biggest crush on him when we went to school, so I agreed.
We had an amazing couple of months together. I had never been so in love with anyone I had ever dated. Then we had our first fight. It was a blur of misunderstandings, harsh words, and lots of emotion. We didn't talk for a few days.
It took all I had not to get emotional when I saw him again, but I knew if I did, he'd get defensive and things would just get worse. After we talked everything over (and we both apologized) I felt great. He told me he loved me and that I was the first girlfriend he'd had in quite a while that he felt semi-serious about. I felt closer to him than I ever had.
But then, he proceeded to spew some crap about how he'd been detaching himself from me and how he didn't think the relationship could work out because of it. Apparently, this so-called "love" he felt for me could be disregarded over our FIRST fight. He may as well of just ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it.
I broke up with him. How was I supposed to be with someone who could detach himself from me over one fight that I apologized for over and over again?
But then I felt bad. I loved him so much- what kind of person would I be if I didn't try again? I texted him, begging him to talk to me. Begging him to tell me why he didn't love me enough to get over this fight. Begging him to tell me why this wouldn't work out if it had been going so well up to that point. I don't beg- ever. His response? "I don't feel like talking right now- sorry." No matter how much I begged him to talk because I needed him to, he wouldn't.
So I said goodbye. Guys- if you don't really care, don't tell a girl she means the world to you and that you love her. Apparently, for my guy, I shattered his perfect image of me by actually having feelings and by being hurt by our fight. Terrible, I know.
Tags: cold breakup
I'm a member of a singles group, a dating agency, basically, and while this was not the most hurtful breakup, it was a pretty cold one. After a month of really great dates and lots of encouragement (from her) for more of the same, the day before a dinner/dance event she slammed me with the revelation of another guy. I absolutely didn't see this coming. Not that we were exclusive, but every bit of feedback I was getting suggested she was focused only on us.
So she called me and in a very business-like way, proceeded to explain that, “The program is set up so you can date other people…” There were no kind softeners. No, “I really like you, but…”; no, “I’ve had a great time with you, but…”; nothing, nada, zip. Just, here are the rules and I followed them.
Then, twice she said, “I wanted to call you myself and let you know, so you didn’t hear it from someone at the group.” Excuse me? What half-mature adult wouldn't call personally to break off a relationship? Newsflash: there's nothing righteous about doing something that's simply responsible. The entire breakup felt like the severing of a business relationship, which makes sense, because she's a corporate officer.
Finally, I wrote her a follow-up e-mail, in which I thanked her for letting me know about this personally (dummy!), and wished her love and happiness. She never replied. Wouldn’t one at least respond in kind, if only briefly? Example: “Dear (you), I wish you love and happiness, too.”
Oh well. The Zen master teaches to disapprove of the action, but not of the actor. Perhaps, but if she becomes available again, I don't have to date her.
Tags: wild out
when i started to date this guy , it was nothing but passion and arguments. four months later he started to talk with someone else . i found out by going through his cell , i never had a reason to go threw this cell. when i had confront him, he felt bad so he started step up. it was great but then i was putting in way more then he was. 6 months later he suddenly didn't want to be in a relationship (idea from his friend} he was there for me still but we still had feelings for each other. he told people we were friends but we were more. after his mom bday last week .(we was official) we started to get more into arguments. i wanted to start dating other people , so we went out saturday everything was right but a bit off . we went to the bar then after the bar he took my laptop n said i dont trust u n push me. we started to get in a argument . his drug dealer brother is missing some stuff , so his brother n him started to blame me . (potheads) i was shock cause i wouldnt dare do that crap but his brother bring strangers into his home. i was even upset when i told him f off im done . he started to call me names . two hours later he went on my fb page n deleted all my photos n friends(he ran off with my laptop) so today i change all my passwords. (im happy to not be with him) he started to text me things n started to name what he dont like about me. like that suppose to hurt
Tags: example 1
not really a break up but here it goes... so i'm 13 and don't give me that focus on your studies crap... I've never been much of a G.F. B.F. type of guy but when one of the hottest girls at the school starts trying to talk to you, you dont just turn down the offer. So it starts off great but its just talking never dating. Then about 2 months later still just talking no dating and im beginning to question our relationship and if we'll ever be more than just what we had been. She tries to tell me we will but she's nervous. I believe her but im still skeptical. About a week later what do you know she says we should stop talking and that she sees me as just a friend. She has no new boyfriend or is event talking to anyone she just got tired i guess. "500 days of Summer" without the happy ending. I now know what it feels like to be heart broken...
this is long SO, im 21 and a girl ive been with for 18months, shes 18. but ive known her for about over 3 years now we met online and immediately connected and liked her i couldnt stop thinking about her even when she stopped talking for a year and got a bf i also had gotten a gf but after all that somehow perfect timing got us to start talking again when we were both recently single and after a few months i fell even harder and we decided to be in a relationship.
anyway she recently came up to stay for new years eve cause she knew itd mean alot to me, a couple days before new years she decided that Me asking her why she wasnt saying much and just moping around was a good reason for her to decide to leave and rip up some heartfelt things i gave her infront of me and say were over as soon as she gets back home etc. but during the days between then and when she actually left 1day before new years, she said she loved me and held, kissed me we had sex etc. but when she got back she blockd all communications with me so about a week after unanswered txts i added her best friend of 7 years to suss something out cause they havent been friends since a few month ago, i immediately found out that its because My ex was talking to and seeing a guy her ''friend'' was hooking up with behind her back, which was also behind my back. and they are already in a relationship and all that shit so she had been lying to me and cheating for a good few weeks i'd say. we promised eachother from the start even though she lived in another state it wouldnt just be another fuck around and the feelings were real and i would just move there anyway we only saw eachother a few times in person but i was still happy loving her and was serious even if it was hard sometimes i just thought that it'd make it all the more better when we were finally together all the time and i was nearly about to make that happen before she did this. she tried blaming her friend for pushing those 2 closer together becoz her friend pissed him off when she was screwing with his head but thats no excuse to go and start fucking him and dating him she should have stopped talking to him when her friend did. people will tell me too bad and that it was the distance thats a problem but i dont think that makes a difference after 18months ive been really hurt before but this managed to top everything else cause im just so sure about this girl and couldnt have feelings for someone else if i tried i cant move on, if you knew half of the things shes said and promised to me and made me youd be just as shocked as i am for what shes done. i dont know how someone can just erase that amount of time with someone they said theyd be with no matter what just like that asif i was nothing and i had never and would never cheat on her. i have to cry myself to sleep and im sick of it and im stupid enough to hope she'll come back like she did before because i have theories that the guy only did it becoz he wanted to piss her friend off for fucking around with him but if they bould BOTH do that to me n her friend then they must be perfect for eachother in a screwed up way and im guessing it will fuck up soon and she'll be alone and regret it because i know he can't love her atleast not like I do if i'm still dumb enough to want her even after what she's done cause i feel empty im used to having txts and msgs etc. from her every morning day & night and it just kills me to have those images of them in my head i can never get over it so all i'm gonna do is wait until she stops ignoring me.
So, he texted me saying were over.. told me he didnt want a girlfriend. Then 3 days later texted me "it was one hell of a run". After our 6 month relationship and him not deciding he wanted a girlfriend he starts to date my friend a month later... i introduced them...
I was befriended on Facebook by a hot guy who had 10 mutual friends as me. He said in the first message "You look sooooo familiar...blah blah blah..." We talked back n forth via FB and txting for a few weeks before he asked me to come over for dinner (he was cooking). RED FLAG ignored by me!! So I went over (stupidity), we had a great time talking, laughing and had a lot in common. We watched a movie, kissed, and so on. That night on my way home he sent a text: you are wonderful!! we talked and text everyday. He asked me out the next night. It was awesome! Then 2 more days that week we got together. he was talking about taking me places, doing stuff together and how beautiful I was. Well, the day after our last date, I didn't hear from him. I sent a txt, he responded 3 hours later...with no XO's or happy faces. Then I didn't hear from him ALL weekend so I sent him an email monday night asking what's going on in a very friendly way. He responded that I'm a wonderful girl, but something just didn't feel right. I kept him as a friend on FB. Yesterday his status changed to "in a relationship". I'm kicking my own ass for falling for that player. DELETE FRIEND!!! I'm really having a hard time understanding why I was so easy and available to him. He dissed me and it was probably someone he was dating before me. I couldn't believe it!
Tags: heartbreak
I met this girl when were 16/17 we had a great relationship from from the start. We did everything together and lost our virginity together. We were together nearly two years and she told.me out of the blue she didnt love me anymore. I wanted nothing to do with her but soon realised i missed her like hell. We tried being friends but just ended up sleeping together for a few more weeks. Until she broke it off again. We went seperate ways and barely spoke since apart from arguments which always ended with us meeting up, kissing and her crying. Its been nearly two years and i cant get her out my head. I have had relationships but ended them because i was still in love with her. Recently weve been txting again and it was great to catch up, until she got drunk and began txting me saying how much she misses me etc. I have been a wreck since she left, drinking and smoking etc. And i am now so confused, she has asked to meet up and as much as i want to i am terrified if meeting her and the thought of her with someone else tears me apart. I feel like i should walk away but i have tried and i get nowhere. I just dont know what to do....
Tags: Mike, suicide girl
I just ended a relationship with the worlds most gullible man. I used to work as a personal assistant for his fiance Jessica, but when Mike used this website to break up with her, she hung herself because she miscarried. Course, Mike freaked out when he found out she was dead and she had been carrying his baby. He used the money she left him to go on a weeks long booze and drug binge. Not a real surprise to me, cause I used the lure of some good weed to get his ass back to my house on Halloween and make him believe I was pregnant with his kid. I knew he would act like the ass he was and break up with Michelle, and I knew that would make Michelle fall apart 'cause she was a mentally fragile wall flower, desperately in need of attention. After she killed herself on New Years Eve, Mike left me all her things and went and got high. He spent two days at her grave, drinking and getting high. Now I just left him at rehab and and cleaning out his apartment. Bye "M&M" lol, thanks for the new car, clothes and job!
Tags: risk, suicide attempt, inverted nipples
Dear Lisa,
For the three months we dated, I had picked up on the fact that you dropped out of and left college quickly, but never inquired as to why. When I finally found out that you had cut your wrists amidst a breakdown and your roommates found you bleeding in your room, it was too much. Maybe it was an isolated incident, but the chance that a dispute between us in the future could lead you to do the same thing is to much of a risk. Relationships are difficult enough without also having to worry about your significant other potentially physically hurting themselves or others. Instead of denying you have deep rooted psychological issues, I hope you get help and eventually find happiness.
Also, you have inverted nipples and despite my best effort to ignore it, it's a turn-off. Not a deal breaker, but a factor non-the-less.
Sincerely,
Mike
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