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The Unstable Entrepenour

November 21, 2016 @ (United States)

Tags: Bad Breakup


I remember that it hurt. Hearing the words hurt - and at the same time, it felt like something out of a movie, like it wasn't happening. After all, how could it? It had been merely a week since our second anniversary, and as an anniversary gift she had given me a card that said, "I promise to be with you for all the years to come."
I couldn't even begin to process it. "How do you feel," she asks me, trying to decipher my off smile and my wondering eyes. I only smile because I don't know what to say, what to feel. I don't fight it, I merely say all-right, shed a couple tears, and drop her off at her house. It took me a couple days for my emotions to catch up with me - and oh boy, did they come in force. Like a thousand crashing waves, every single negative emotion in the book comes, all at once, all clamoring for my attention in a sea of deprecating voices: "you weren't enough," "she got tired of you," "you aren't good enough for anyone" ; and as I struggle to get them in check, I was still left wondering: why exactly did it happen?
I never got a straight answer to that question; at least, none that I understood. She mentioned that she wanted to try being with a girl (she's bi, but not in practice yet), that I had been insensitive about one fight that we had more than a year ago, that I was too unstable in my life for her to think about settling down with me. "If my ex had asked me to move in with him, I would've done it in an instant" she said. Surprisingly enough, her life wasn't in any way better than mine: a education major working as a cashier at one of the lowest paying grocery shops in the area, with no car telling me, a computer engineering major with a car, and a delivery job earning 2.5x more per hour as her.
While I could see how she was right, since I had been thinking about dropping out of school, and I had changed my major more than three times in the last six months, I just didn't understand why that was an issue now, all of a sudden. The only answer I can come up with is that perhaps the spark, that magical, elusive feeling that binds people together just died over time for her, while mine grew stronger and stronger. While she was thinking about how to break the news to me, I was thinking what would be the best date to travel to Disneyland with her, since she had told me not too long before, that she'd like me to propose to her at the Cinderella Castle.
I write this now, two months later, even thought it feels like a lifetime ago. My speculating and unstableness paid off after all; because I was willing to take risks, I dropped out of school, and started working in Real Estate. In the first month, I rose from Intern to District Manager at a local firm, and when some shady situations came to light regarding the owners, I left the firm, and opened my own. I'm earning four times what I was before, and it'll only grow from here. Even so, I still look back and wonder what could've been. When she ended things, it felt like someone had taken a hammer to the glass sculpture that was my future with her; and even though I'm not crying over it anymore, I have yet to pick up the pieces, and start again.


       

Sophie

July 11, 2016 @ (Los Angeles)

Tags: Taking a break


I met him in december, 2015 at a party and we were both attracted to each other and ended up cuddling a bit. I was about to leave for college, but decided to stay as I wanted to have a relationship with him, eventhough I knew that chances are we might break up, but that was a risk I was willing to take! So I applied and got into to college close by to where he lives. Due to his busy schedule, we only saw each other every two weeks and I know that this wasn't much, but I loved him so much and wanted things to work out. I hoped that during the summer we would have more time to spend together. May came along and I found that he had to study during the summer for exams he had in August, but he said that he would make time to see me.

We're in the middle of July and I haven't heard from him in two weeks and haven't seen him in almost a month! I was in Italy atm and asked to meet up with him to discuss what was going on...he read the message but never replied, so I was forced by message to ask him for a break! He replied agreeing to it and said that at the moment he is absorbed with other things such as his studies and that after his exams we would have time to reflect and meet up to discuss the final decision. I was devasted as I still love him and want to be with him and the fact that he didn't fight to keep me, made me realise that chances are he could have lost interest!

Although I hope that after his exams we would get back together, but if it doesn't I am going to have to take time to move on.


       

Alanna

March 22, 2013 @ (ukraine)

Tags: break up, cheating


We started our relationship in October, 2010. From the beginning we were extremely comfortable with each other. Needless to say, we shared a level of intimacy that seemed unreal for two human beings to share. For a little over two years, everything was perfect, a strong word to use, I realize, but there seems as though there can be no other way to describe it, all I needed was him and all he needed was me, we’d spent most days together, and the time we were apart we spent communicating through one or the other form of technology, and it was never one sided. I would contact him as much as he would contact me. We became so codependent, irrational as it seems, it was hard to even ever imagine a life without him. I changed the way he thought, when I had had met him he was impulsive, to say the least. His character comprised of instinct and upbringing. He grew up in a large family, and now would be the right time to point out his islamic roots, his father has never had a ‘father to son’ talk and, initially, he too, was introverted. His thoughts, suppressed. I changed that, he no longer believes in following anyone without question, I eradicated his naivety. Before making a decision, he now rationalizes the consequences, or so I thought.
Although originally from pakistan, He lives in a first world country, two years, four months down our relationship, he was invited to pakistan, to attend the wedding of his cousin brother with his cousin sister, yes, cousins getting married is a perfectly normal thing to do in pakistan, never mind the incest or medical issues raised by it. Anyway, he was to be gone for two weeks.
Upon his return, I learnt, through no help of his, that while his stay in pakistan, he had cheated on me, with one of his cousins. Although, I know it is a possibility for any person to cheat, I would never think of him cheating on me. I still have trouble convincing myself some days.
But all that is done now, we broke up in February, 2013. Its been over a month now.
I have forgiven him for what he did. I am not sure if I would ever get back with him for the only reason of the risk of him repeating his impulsive action. It is futile to talk about this as it is under no intention of his to be with me.
We see each other everyday and on most weekends too. And I see him, looking at me, telling me how beautiful i look, noticing the slightest change of my appearance, our legs touching under the table even though there is clearly plenty of room to sit separate. All this is just so natural for me, it appears to almost be innate.
Well, I suppose it doesn’t help that even though we have broken up, we keep an active sexual relationship. We agreed that it was simply too good to let go and neither of us have had sex with another person after the break up, also, we currently live in a country where the chances of either of us having another relationship are slim. So for me, this set up is actually pretty good, but I suppose he wants more.

A common friend of ours is in a long distance relationship, and he currently has a girl visiting him who happens to like him, and to avoid any trouble, he asked my ex to ‘seduce’ her. I presume, it should not have surprised me, but when he jumped at the opportunity, I was left speechless. I was moving on, happy even, but this little event left me hanging dry, and feelings I was too scared to confront before have managed to finally push their way through. As I type this, he is meeting her, today, for the first time, in hopes to sleep with her. And I am left, feeling alone, unwanted, insecure. I feel as though he moved on too quickly, with so much desperation, it disgusts me, makes me feel disrespected. I worry that even the times in our relationship when we were happy was also a lie. I can not live with that truth.


       

Anonymous

May 20, 2012 @ (FL)

Tags: die, dying, abortion


I dated a girl name Alyssa for 2 years and about 5 months. We moved to attend grad school in a new city so I spent every hour of fall 2010 either studying or with her, so I had no friends nearby. We had had some rocky times because I did study abroad and was entering law school, but basically she didn't trust me and I didn't communicate how much I loved her. It was fine to break up over that, but the way she did it was unacceptable.

One night she kept talking about her friend Karen, but it was really really suspicious how nervous she was and for some reason 2 girls drinking a whole bottle of whiskey in a night seemed like a stretch. So I look at her facebook page from that night "Great night with KC and AC" KC was Karen, AC I quickly figured out was Anthony something. I confront her and she breaks up with me. We exchange our things about 5 days later and she tells me she has already gone on 2 dates with him. We talk one more time and she tells me not to call unless there is an emergency.

About 2 days later I destroy my knee playing soccer. Tear all 4 main ligaments, other smaller ligaments and tendon, smash nerves, etc. My knee stayed out of the socket. A major risk of this is that you can cut off the circulation and/or sever the vein in your leg which can cause you to die or have your leg amputated. Surgeon comes in and tells me I have about a 40% chance of dying within the next 48 hours. So I call Alyssa because I could be dying, I think that qualifies as an emergency. Goes to voicemail. I text her asking just to talk over the phone since I know no one at school since I spent all my free time with her first semester. No response text at first then she said "I won't talk to you. Have your mom call me tomorrow when she gets in from her emergency flight." So I was left in the hospital to die alone by her.

It gets better... A couple of weeks later I am just at rock bottom. On pain medicine (I didn't walk for about 2 or 3 months the injury was so bad). I called her angry and she told me that she was pregnant. The guy she ran off on from me Anthony whatever had knocked her up. So she aborted it.

When someone is potentially dying in the hospital and has no one there and they request you to call just for an hour to talk it takes a pretty selfish person to refuse. I think most people would (and for that matter should) drive to the hospital to keep someone company until their family arrives.

Long story short, it takes a pretty selfish immature cold hearted person to leave someone in the hospital to die and then to abort their kid.


       

Young And Naive

November 29, 2011 @ (nj)

Tags: naivegirl stupidguy


Ok so my break up story is about a guy I dated in my highschool years. I met Shane my sophomore in highschool he was a freshman. I thought he was really cute and vice versa. He always asked our mutual friends about me. I liked him because he was sweet and he seemed like he genuinely liked me. He tried getting a friend to ask me out for him cuz he was shy but I refused to give an answer until he asked for himself. Eventually got the nerve to ask me I was ecstatic and of course said yes. We dated for about a month and a half and he broke up with me cuz I refused to be the one to kiss him first and he didn't have the balls to do it. So we kept in touch and remained friends. We started "talking" again my junior year and he told me he wanted to try us out again. I told him I wouldn't do it unless he kissed me first so he kissed me and I said yes. He got excited and hugged and kissed me again. He treated me pretty good and we talked on the phone almost every night but we never got the chance to hang out cuz my mom is over bearing and extremely strict. We dated for about a month before he broke up with me only to ask me back out a day later. I wasn't going to say yes but his twin brother told me that he talked about me nonstop and that he missed me so I gave in. We dated for 2 more months after that we loved eachother or so I thought. One day while on the phone he broke up with me after a huge argument and it absolutely crushed me. Again we remained friends. My senior year we started talking again but it didn't go anywhere. I graduated highschool and we kept in touch. I dated other people he dated other people. We started talking again(I couldn't stay away being with him just felt so nice) we had sex a couple times and we're thinking about going out again but I decided I didn't feel like risking the hurt again but we remained in touch and flirted all the time. No matter how many girls he dated it always came back to me so I know deep down he does have real feelings for me but he's too immature to commit(none of his relationships last long) I eventually just gave up on him and could not be happier with that decision. I'm with an amazing guy now. We've been together for a little over a year and are engaged. I have no contact with my ex at all. Ahh it feels nice to get all of this off of my chest$


       

Violet

April 19, 2011 @ (NYC)

Tags: relationships, break up, love, hurt, pain, choices


'After 8 years in a relationship you realize there comes a point you ask yourself. Did I just miss out on "my life" and live someone else's or should I move on to the future and make this"our life". Well after 8 years you obviously share almost every moment together. Living together, same friends, family is involved, your best friends, you have animals together, or even children, both have great careers, may even own a business together, you have this life together. Which are all positive things that you want in a relationship. Thats the outter shell of a relationship looks and sounds wonderful. The inner part of that shell is what matters right? Well when you have to deal with BAGGAGE. Emotional problems, affectionate problems, ego problems, privacy problems, boundary problems,"my own" space problems, or "I need space". So how invovled are you supposed to get? Then there is the other part of the relationship is where you waiting for this person to change and do all the pro''s and con''s of each other. Yet you LOVE this person more than anything in the world and want to be with this person more than anything in the world. Its like where is the fun and love and when you are looking to change and figure out this person everyday. Where do you find the time to build a future when you are worried about the past or the right now? Then again, you want to work it out so badly because you love this person so much. Then it goes back to the beginning question am I missing out on my life or am I worried about their life? What to do? Big risk. Lose out on love and may never feel this love again or live life they way you want and hope to be in love like that again.Therefore, I chose the hard way; the challenge after long 8 years I chose to leave the one I love its been a year and I still love him. It was one of the most hardest things I have ever done in my life. I miss him everyday, think of him everyday and wish he was still my friend. I know he moved on and can carless how I feel since I was the one who left the relationship. Its not that your getting over the person when you break up, it getting over the fact your not in love anymore and want that feeling back more than anything. That is what I learned.n Don''t get me wrong I have had one of the most amazing years of my life and don''t regret my choice. Break ups are not easy. ',


       

Crushed

March 23, 2011 @ (Georgia)

Tags: ruthless


I was with my guy for over 6 years and i was 7 months pregnant, well a month before i found out i was pregnant he changed, he was always angry and he acted like he despised my touch. well i sorta knew what it was but i was going through the hormones of pregnancy and i just ignored it. well i was bored so i drove to his job to surprise him when he got off so we could maybe go get something to eat, well for all tn he women out there who have experienced this you know what im about to describe, a woman came out and was standing next to a truck she worked there and i got that gut feeling that there was something wrong so i couldnt stop staring at her. then he comes out and the first thing he says is, why are you here, and then walks away to go talk to that b****. i stood there in disbelief so i began to cry and i stormed off, well he turns out was in the beginning stages of a relationship with her and they only went as far as kissing. but fast forward to when i was 7 months pregnant. he was still acting crazy even though we had moved way across the country so i guess he was upset i caught him i dont know but he was still being a jerk. so i ask him when will get married since we already started a family and we been together for so long, well that bastard tells me that he doesnt want to marry me anymore cause he doesnt think im the "one" anymore so he doesnt want to risk marrying me if its just a big mistake. his words exactly. well being pregnant, that far along as well, you can imagine the devastation i felt. well since he was gonna just abandon me and our unborn child i dug through his emails the next day and he told that trick that he was gonna leave and go back home. well being pregnant and knowing that the father is gonna just abandon you and your child will crush anybody's heart.


       

Mike

January 03, 2011 @ (Pennsylvania)

Tags: risk, suicide attempt, inverted nipples


Dear Lisa,

For the three months we dated, I had picked up on the fact that you dropped out of and left college quickly, but never inquired as to why. When I finally found out that you had cut your wrists amidst a breakdown and your roommates found you bleeding in your room, it was too much. Maybe it was an isolated incident, but the chance that a dispute between us in the future could lead you to do the same thing is to much of a risk. Relationships are difficult enough without also having to worry about your significant other potentially physically hurting themselves or others. Instead of denying you have deep rooted psychological issues, I hope you get help and eventually find happiness.

Also, you have inverted nipples and despite my best effort to ignore it, it's a turn-off. Not a deal breaker, but a factor non-the-less.

Sincerely,

Mike