I am lost in my heart and my soul. I am very active in my church and I spend a great deal of time proselytizing to help bring others to Christ. Ever since I was 14 our minister has taken a special hand in my learning of Gods will and ways. He even encouraged me to date his adopted daughter Svetlana after he brought her here from Russia. A couple of years later, Pastor Williams encouraged me to marry Svetlana even though we were both still in school. We were married when I was 16 and she was 14. I was nervous as I was a virgin on our wedding night and I wanted to take it slow but Svetlana was very insistant that we have sex. We made love once, then she never wanted to do it any more. 6 months later our beautiful daughter Kima was born, 8 lbs 4 ounces and looked just like her mother. Pastor Williams was so helpful always offering to look after my wife and baby when ever he sent me out to spread the word of God. I had to leave school, because Pastor told me God spoke to him and said I was to be his beacon in the land to guide folks to his eternal love. I was often gone from home for many days and sometimes weeks as Pastor gave me instructions on where to spread His word. One day I was traveling near our home town, so I decided to stop in to see my family. When I went in to our trailer, I found my wife and Pastor Williams asleep in our bed. I could see they were both naked. I was so confused and I left without saying anything. A few days later, I talked to Pastor about it and he said the two of them had been praying and speaking in tongues. They had both been so posessed by the spirit, they chose to bare themselves to the Lord. He assured me that they had not engaged in fornication and that they both were just so exhausted they fell asleep. I believed him because I know he would never lie as it is a sin. Well, last week I found out Svetlana is pregnant again and her and I have not had sex since our wedding night. When I asked the Pastor for guidance, he told me I needed to "man up" and take care of my family. He explained to me that some women can carry a mans seed for years and have several children from only one mating. But then a sister in the church told me that she knew Pastor and my wife were committing adultry and that Pastor is actually the father of my Kima and my unborn child. I dont know who to believe, but I am so hurting in my soul. I think this may be the Lord testing me, or perhaps Satan trying to destry another of God's unions. I asked Svetlana to be truthful with me, and she just left and went to tell Pastor that I am being sinful in mistrusting her. I got on the internet to seek answers and somehow wound up on this site. I see so much pain here, and somehow feel kinship with it. But I also want you all to know, God loves you all, and he wants only your happiness. God has a plan. May he bless us all, Amen.
Tags: example1
Two son's,grandbaby,Big house,cottage,condo in the south,boat,personal watercrafts,atv's,cars,income....Gave it all up for love.
My wife was more like a work partner.Did everything for me and the family. She had very low self esteem and didn't want to do anything socially just with her family.We were intamit twice in 6 years. I had a female friend I use to visit about 16 or 17 years ago strictly platonic we just enjoyed each others company without feeling any pressure. Well we ran in to each other again and a relationship developed this time, I know "shame on me". I fell in love with this woman and we have been together a little over a year.I left my wife and she left her husband. Her two daughters have adjusted extremely well. I love this woman but I’m also heart broken.No one in my previous family has anything to do with me at all not my son's or granddaughter, in-laws, no one. My ex-wife has all the material items, everything including $2,000.00 I deposit in her account every month, we have never been to court or had any outside settlement input. She is still devastated and so are the kids. I’m happy, extremely happy but heartbroken. Sometimes I even feel like I should take my own life just to have the pain and suffering that I have caused other people.
Thanks for a place to vent.
Happy but heartbroken, my sons were my best friends period...I miss them so much.
Tags: My story
Hi all, at last found a site where i can spill my feelings. It all stated 8 years back. My neighbour boy (who calls me big bro) was my very good friend since childhood. He is 4 years younger to me and was doing BDS (bachelor in Dental Surgery). He had a senior girl in the college whom he respected as a elder sister. In many conversations he used to cite her examples. I became influenced towards this girl and asked him to give me her mobile number. Upon a promise that i wont play with the girls feelings, he gave me the number. After many attempts to make the girl talk to a stranger, she finally felt comfortable talking to me. Our relationship grew on phone and though we hadn't seen each other, the inter bond kept growing. Then one fine day, we decided to meet. On the first look, it was love at first site for both of us. Whenever she had to go her college in the other distant city, i used to drop her to the next city bus stand. Shopping together, going into malls..... all was like a dream. Then after 3 years, i asked her to ask her parents for marriage as i was very keen to get married to her and so she was. She belonged to a hindu brahmin family which had a staunch belief in astrology. When her parents asked my birth details, i gave them my true details. Although i knew our horoscopes don't match, still i wanted to marry her on truth and not on a bed of lies. Her father told me that since she was a manglik (an astrological condition) and i was not she could be married to a manglik boy only. We both tried to convince them for 2 long years but they didnt agreed. Although i am well educated and placed at a high position in an MNC, they said a straight "NO" to me. She even tried suicide thrice to convince them but they didnt agreed. After that, she started avoiding my calls. As our relation was entering its seventh year, my family told me that they can'nt wait any longer and my mother being hyper tensive, wanted the things to be settled at this end or the other. Finally, we went to see her father to convince him about my love but a straight NO was his answer. I was heartbroken as the girl stopped picking up my calls. I went through a three month anti depression course. Then my family finalised some other girl for me and got me married. After two years of marriage and a son, my ex again came in contact with me. She is still single, has crossed 30 years of age and is repenting on her decision to go as per her parents decision. She says that she always loved me and avoided my phone calls just to make me hate her and to make me move on with my life. Although i have got a loving wife but the place which i had given to my ex, i wont be able to give it to anyone. I am trying to pull on with life without my wife knowing it but it is like getting born and dying every day. Now my ex's parents are searching for a boy but for her too it will be just another compromise that she will be making. How people shatter lives of lovers in India just on the pretext that the astrological horoscopes dont match is a lifelong nightmare for lovers. Neither the children nor the parents nor the ones to whom they get married ever stay happy just because of this sick mentality of horoscope matching. Life is hell without the one whom you love so deeply, whom you have visualised and imagined in each and every moment in your coming life, in all your future times. Life is truly a hell.
Tags: army break up
Heres a little backround first; Well I started dating this girl April first, a year ago.. This being my senior year in high school, we did about everything together.. Homecoming, prom, etc.... I gave up so much for this girl. I lost so many friends to just be with this girl. I could honestly say this was my first love, and my longest relationship so far... Since mom ey is tight with my family, I thought the best solution for me to go to college was enlist with the Army..heres where my story begins....
I had to head off to boot August 2nd.. To fort benning, for infantry training, right before I left my family and her went out to dinner and such, really had a nice time.. Everything was perfect between us, gave her a final kiss good bye, and off I went..
So basic started I wrote this girl, every single day for nine Weeks... She wrote me twice, toward thr beginning, everything seemed okay, she said she missed and loved me etc..then she just stopped. I kept writing, and wondering whats going on.. At week 9 we got our 36 hour pass. I call her up and she literally was just like "oh hey" in thr most unenthusiastic voice ever, I was so excited to talk to her, she was all that was on my mind for Weeks... And she didnt even care.... We ended up fighting over it.. I was pretty unhappy about it. I expected a bigger reaction I guess..
I ended up breaking my leg and sent home for con leave, comes to find out shes been seeing another dude, she changed her status to single on fb and starts hittin up all these guys... After all this, I still wanted to try and make it work. She acts like im the bad guy, and I deserve this... I just dont get, after dating for a year and a half, I couldn't even get a letter saying "f you, im done" or anything... She just left me in the cold..I still think about her to this day. I've been miserable since she left me, no girl has made me feel the way she did.
Tags: two years, serious, love, hurt, miss him, want him back, heartbreak, pure, happy, how
I don't want this to sound like another bad romance or break up.. Because we weren't. I know this is hard to believe but in eighth grade, I met the love of my life. Don't get me wrong, I was really young and naive. But he had me at hello. He was tender but strong, charming but sweet, and fun ut committed. He was perfect for me. My other half has finally connected with my soul. We dated seriously for 2 years. We never rushed anything, always a casual move or a serious discussion. We realized the dangers of becoming as close as we did but were so sure we would be together for years to come. He loved me enough to even sit through New Moon with me on our year anniversary. I guess I was never a great girlfriend to him but I couldn't, and still can't live a day without him. A week after our two years, we got into a fight and my friend got involved and made him want to break up with me.. We were done at that point.. We disconnected and lost each other. Tragically, I grieved for months about losing him. He was my gift and I let it go. He moved,literally, across the country and it's been 8 months since I've seen or heard from him. Recently, he popped up into my Facebook and we started talking. I realized about 3 weeks ago how much I missed him and how much I want him back.. He is still kind of bitter, but is sincere too. I'm not sure what I should do anymore about this and was seeking help and guidance from someone who has gone through something like this. I know we both messed up but I still love him dearly. And I don't want to sound like a hopeless romantic because I'm not. I gave myself to him and have lost it. He means the world to me... Still.. Thank you for reading my reach out..
Tags: example 1
So I knew him since I was in grade five, he dated my best friends' older sister for 3 years, I never thought about him romantiaclly back then, and never really thought I would. They broke up but stayed friends, they are still friends to this day.
When I was 16 my best friend and I started hanging out with her older sister her friends (him included). I didnt really think of him that way stil, until one night my friend told me he was texting her and told her that he thought I was the most beautiful girl hes ever seen, he was shy of me I guess. (But he didnt have a reason to be)I was surprised and excited and I felt awesome. I decided to go try talking to him, when I did he still acted shy around me. But he eventually let down a little of his shyness and started talking and acting more freely around me. Then one day, we were sitting in the backyard with a few of his friends, when all of a sudden they all just started dispersing, once everyone else had cleared he took my hand and asked me if I wanted to be his girlfriend. It was so cute; planned out. I said yes. He was so amazing to me in our first few months, he was my first, and he didnt push me, and I thought everything was perfect. Then we started fighting. All he wanted to do was spend time with his friends and never even thought to invite me to come. I was seeing him twice a week at most, and our sex life was faltering to say the least. We broke up a few times, off and on again and again. I was the first one to break up with him, he begged me back, cried and pleaded. He seemed like he was actually sorry, so I did. About a year later (off and on) one of his friends started seeing this girl who they met one night at the bar. She seemed alright, not goodlooking by any stretch, but she had something in her personality I guess. I was going to mexico, we were all talking about it one night and this new girl was like " so are we going to be going snowboarding while our partners are in mexico?" and he kind of brushed it off, like he didnt want me to be around while they made plans. It kinda got me going, and all the times he brought her up. Once I actually was losing my mind about it and decided to ask him if he had a thing for her. He brushed it off and said she was annoying...
A few months later she and his friend broke up.
We broke up again, like normal I thought we would get back together again, we talked, made plans and he blew me off. Then one night there was a party, I had to work that night so I couldnt attend. But my friend was there. The next morning she called me and told me that he showed up there with her. I was frantic. I went over to his house. His roommate answered the door and told me he wasnt home. I asked if I could get a few of my things, she let me in.
I went into his room and ther on the floor was her bag, a pair of nasty panties and a bunch of her shit. Oh man did I ever want to burn it, but I didnt, instead I just grabbed everything I ever gave him, and left. I went on a vacation. He texted me a few months ago, and I stupidly replied trying to be just his friend. He texts me now and then telling me how much he misses me, and was stupid. But never really saying anything. Whatever, I have an amazing boyfriend now who I have been dating for 6 months and I am happier than I ever was with him.
Tags: 1
I was clear on my intentions when I told the universe what I wanted "Somebody who loves me as I am" and he showed up. He was funny, flirty, nervous, self conscious and lacked confidence. Why? God knows because he was handsome, fit, funny and available. We worked together and at first i did not want to work with him because he had a sarcastic and surly streak, but over time he won me with his charm. It was an intense and passionate love right from the start, but i had to acknowledge that even with all his flirting, I was the one who asked him out. He reciprocated and we had afternoon dates over lunch and long walks. then we started sleeping together and I told him that I loved him. That didn't go over very well. We dated steadily for 2 months when he went on a holiday. The people he was going to meet up with seemd a strange mix but I didn't know him that well at the time.
Turns out he met up with a woman from his past who drifted into the spot of "platonic friend." I said he needed to make clear his intentions with her. She kept calling and he kept answering.
Then she became this regular part of his/our life but she lived in the states so was far removed. I started to get jealous and we had our first of many break ups over his lack of honesty and the way he painted the picture of her involvement in his life. i was in love with him, saw him every day at work and couldn't break free form his emotional pull. I took a transfer. that worked for a week or two and then we started speaking again and seeing each other again but it was not th same. He started to pint out my flaws, I saw his evasiveness and aloof behaviour more clearly. We started to disagree. Eventually i watched him openly flirt with another woman at a cocktail party and knew that it was time to move on. He denied it of course, called me jealous, said I was hot and cold with him. We had tickets to the company Christmas party so agreed to still go together. there was no magic anymore. He won a door prize of jewellery at the party and reluctantly gave it to me. My co-workers thought his distance was strange. I tried so hard not to belittle him or be angry with him but it was hard. He drove me home, we said our goodbyes, he was cold and distant, the man I knew hm to be in the beginning, the man i didn't want to work next to. I asked him why he would start dating me again if he wasn't that interested. He said he was sorry about that. And then it was over. Now I'm working on a different floor and working through this breakup so that I can continue on in finding love. I just wasn't clear in my intentions.
Tags: first part
alrighty i met her 4 day into school she came into class and i noticed her quickly we began talking and 3 weeks later we were freinds she broke her leg and i would take her to class carry her books until i told her i really liked her and she told me we needed to talk about it we did but i was only expressing myself to her and went ahead and asked her to homecoming we had lt of good moments and the day of homecoming during a song i kissed her we went at it crazy and i asked her to be my girlfreind she said yes and we had a great night during a week we loved and lueghed and on the tenth day she said she wasnt ready and left me stranded with a note i read to myself alot im going to try getting her back but i need some advice help a bro out thanks
Tags: long distance, long relation
I ended my 7 year long relation few days back.It started when I was 16. A high school romance...butterflies in the stomach and stuff...We went to college to different cities but it kept on. She was in a girl's college with no guys around. She used to come to meet me sometimes but meetings were rare and it took months for us to meet. We kept together by phone and occassional meetings. I was too emotionally attached to her and felt the same for her as well. Years passed, I thought our love grew stronger. We were different people. I was very ambitious and a little introvert. She was a complete extrovert, liked attention and was not much into career. During college I found a few girls who I thought were more mature than she was but I loved her for what she was, never ever thought of snapping it...Over the years I created an illusion(atleast now I feel so) that she was the one and we are together for eternity. I faced some really difficult time in 2010 and she was rock solid by my side.My love and respect grew for her. I reciprocated in the same way. Being by her side everytime. She said she respected me for that. Finally we got a job in the same city and after 4 long years we were together again. Could meet. I felt complete. I thought our relation was evolving. I got more serious. Told my family. She did the same.(not Mom and dad, but others).I was very happy with her. I felt she was happy with me as well. In july, I got busy with an office assignment, she said she was busy as well.I did not care as I trusted her. In october I was out of the country for work. We were talking still.Perfectly fine. No issues. I came back in November. It was her birthday on 6th. I wanted to be with her 24x7 and told her so. She agreed. But on 4th, she called me and said she wanted to party with friends. After some discussion and my failed attempts to change her mind, it was agreed that she would party with her friends. I was sad. But still wanted to be with her. On her Bday night, I found her lying to me about a guy's call the other night.He was an office colleague whom she knew for 6 months.Trvial issue I thought, we discussed and she said she shouldn't have lied, apologised. I was happy. But to my surprise I caught her lying again. Same day. I was angry. We talked and she confessed that she kissed that guy on her bday. She told it to be an impulsive one and only a one time thing..I asked her to choose between the guy and me. To my freaking surprise she said she is having a strong feeling towards him. I was miserable. I somehow persuaded her to meet me and not think of snapping a 7 year relation just like that. We met the next day, talked.I was so scared that night that I slept holding her hand and kept murmuring,"Please, dont go, dont go" and she kept telling me she wont. She agreed that she made a mistake and she must stop it. But somehow, she was not happy. After a long discussion the next day, she confessed that her bday was not the first time and she had been cheating on me while I was out of the country in October. I was broken. We used to talk every day then and she had no guilt. Nothing. I asked her to forget him and come back. But she did not. She said she could not stop talking to him.. She gave up a 7 year relation for a guy whom she knows just for 5 months. The guy knew about it all around that she was committed. Yet....I feel horrible right now. All the time I was out, I kept telling people that she's waiting for me to get back..she was even calling me and telling me that she missed me and wanted me back soon. But in reality she was in someone else's arms. I don't know if I would ever be able to forget this. I don't know if I would ever be able to love anyone now..I could not believe it..I mean it was all OK for me till 6th, not even the slightest hint.I was buying stuff for her bday.and on 9th, it was over....I feel broken...and find solace only in alcohol
Tags: naivegirl stupidguy
Ok so my break up story is about a guy I dated in my highschool years. I met Shane my sophomore in highschool he was a freshman. I thought he was really cute and vice versa. He always asked our mutual friends about me. I liked him because he was sweet and he seemed like he genuinely liked me. He tried getting a friend to ask me out for him cuz he was shy but I refused to give an answer until he asked for himself. Eventually got the nerve to ask me I was ecstatic and of course said yes. We dated for about a month and a half and he broke up with me cuz I refused to be the one to kiss him first and he didn't have the balls to do it. So we kept in touch and remained friends. We started "talking" again my junior year and he told me he wanted to try us out again. I told him I wouldn't do it unless he kissed me first so he kissed me and I said yes. He got excited and hugged and kissed me again. He treated me pretty good and we talked on the phone almost every night but we never got the chance to hang out cuz my mom is over bearing and extremely strict. We dated for about a month before he broke up with me only to ask me back out a day later. I wasn't going to say yes but his twin brother told me that he talked about me nonstop and that he missed me so I gave in. We dated for 2 more months after that we loved eachother or so I thought. One day while on the phone he broke up with me after a huge argument and it absolutely crushed me. Again we remained friends. My senior year we started talking again but it didn't go anywhere. I graduated highschool and we kept in touch. I dated other people he dated other people. We started talking again(I couldn't stay away being with him just felt so nice) we had sex a couple times and we're thinking about going out again but I decided I didn't feel like risking the hurt again but we remained in touch and flirted all the time. No matter how many girls he dated it always came back to me so I know deep down he does have real feelings for me but he's too immature to commit(none of his relationships last long) I eventually just gave up on him and could not be happier with that decision. I'm with an amazing guy now. We've been together for a little over a year and are engaged. I have no contact with my ex at all. Ahh it feels nice to get all of this off of my chest$
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