Searching for "until"


222 Results For 'until'

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March 25, 2016 @ (Anywhere)

Tags: #surviving


I was in an emotionally abusive relationship. I never was interested in dating until 9 months ago. I am 20 years old and I am young, but I fell in love. To me he was perfect until one day he wasn't. He told me I wasn't attractive enough for him, that I was stupid, a whore, worthless, etc. None of which is true. My friends were confused what I saw in him, and I will not try to sound conceited, but I knew I was much better looking. He made his own insecurities mine, to hide how he really felt. I was so depressed, I lost almost 15 bs. I was never big. I was 5'6" and went from 122 lbs to 106 lbs in three months. It was unhealthy. The first time we broke up I was devastated. I didn't eat or sleep, my anxiety was so bad it overtook my life. I was so desperate to make things right that I drove him further away. There was a point where I couldn't leave my bed and my roommates were genuinely concerned about me. A month later we got back together. It was beautiful. I was so happy and he said he loved me all the time. However 2 months later, it crashed again. I am OKAY. I am here to tell you it gets better. We broke up two days ago, I cried yesterday, but that's okay. I feel liberated. I realized that yes, we love each other, but we both are too immature to be together at this point. Sometimes when a relationship ends, you need to take a step back and really look at it. He holds grudges, he mentally abused me, he never made sacrifices for me, which made me resent him. I realized that sometimes love isn't enough. Sometimes you realize that no matter how desperate you are to make things work, they just don't. I know it's hard to accept, heck I am struggling too. If it is meant to be it will be. Maybe it's just not the right time, but I can tell you that once you hit rock bottom you can go nowhere else, but up. I was at rock bottom, I lived and someone I am okay. I haven't bombarded him with texts begging him to take me back or whine how it isn't fair. I simply said I wouldn't contact him unless he contacted me and he hasn't. I will not reach out again. My best advice to anyone going through what I survived, as much as it sucks and as much as you want to reach out and be with them, cut them off. Take a real look at your relationship. Do you want to go back to it? Is it worth it? If it is, than fight for it and if it works, that's amazing, if it doesn't at least you'll know you gave everything you had. I can promise you it isn't easy, but it does get better.


       

Estf VLM

March 22, 2016 @ (200 Davisville ave)

Tags: Difficult break up..



I decided to write about how is my recently break up going. I know many of you are having the same situation as me, therefore I will explain how is my situation so you can understand me.

A year ago, 2015, I started dating a guy from a different culture, religion, way of thinking and more. We connected really well, at first it was like wonderland everyday, we talked for hours, went out, laughed, and more.. It felt like a real relationship full of confidence, truth, and more of it we respected each other. We did so many things together, I even started to learn his language, I changed so many things for him, The first 7 moths together were so perfect, I never though that he will change from one day to another.. He stated changing day by day, sometimes i felt like he was so bored to be with me, but other times i felt like he was so happy, I was so confused, even tho i never told him what i felt, he sometimes noticed i guess but never said a word. There were some days he came to me saying he wants to try a night with another girl, i swear he stabbed me every time he said that, but i couldn’t do anything, all i did was laugh like it wasn’t a big deal but it was. I hide so many times how i really felt because i didn’t want him to worry or something. I remember even he told me he could thrown me if I do something wrong, and many times he told me that his friends will always come first than me, I mean I was his girlfriend right?, why would he say stuff like that.. It was just too much but i never payed attention because I did not want to lose him, and I did anyways.

Anyways, a week before he broke up with me, he was acting so weird, I knew there was something but like always I didn’t pay attention. Indeed there was something, on a Tuesday, Jan 12, 2016, at 8pm he came to me and said he wanted to talk to me about something, there.. I knew he wanted to break up, my world just fall apart when he said it, he gave me some crazy reasons and I just played along. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.. Well after that, 3 days after I went to a party, and I remember i got so drunk, all because I found out he was already talking to another girl. IT BROKE ME…

A week after, he came again to me but not as he wanted to go back, he just wanted to make sure of some stuff, but neither of us could help it so we kissed, everything came back to HAPPINESS, only it was NOT.! He said I can’t control myself around you but I want to still being like this, only not as a relationship, I first said alright let’s try, but to be honest it wasn’t enough for me, he was like that with me but also playing with another girl, so i tried to stopped it and until now i couldn’t. I am still in the same situation, i feel like a stupid sometimes, thinking that he would change, but no, it is worse. he still is playing with that other girl, and I am still hurting.

I will never regret any of this, the only thing i regret is how blind I am.


       

Henrietta

March 22, 2016 @ (China)

Tags: painfullbreakupandstilllonging


We were together for months. He loved me deeply. For me? I love him so much and three months later after he broke up with me I am still in so much agony. It was a long distance relationship. I was going to come after a year since I am still in college. I was just asking for one year. Not ten years, not twenty three, not even three. Just one year. But somehow he kinda lost his grip. Until now, I really do not know why we just all of a sudden fell apart. And I could not understand why we cannot fight for us. He said he has his own life now and he can no longer run this marathon with me. Was I depending too much on him for emotional support because of depression from my family problems? Was I too needy or too clingy? But I promise I never complained when he was busy. I just do not know why or how he fell out of love for me. Every single day, I ask why. I wonder if he ever opens his Skype and reads my messages begging him for another chance. Now, I am about to graduate but I have no direction since the man at the end of the tunnel, well he is no longer there to keep his promise. I am just totally lost and miserable. But I am not mad. I do not resent him either. I am grateful for everything. I just want to be his girl and I would give my all. (Sorry for any typos.)


       

Prvnce

March 13, 2016 @ (Florida )

Tags: bad breakups, heart broken


Growing up, I've never had a sexual preference. I was always afraid to tell people because I knew no one would understand. Then my 10th grade year in highschool, I met the perfect being, the "love of my life". We started talking December 28th and made it official January 1st at 12:04. We've had a bumpy road. I always was so used to being heart broken that I didn't know how to love anymore or even appreciate it when it's shown to me. But he sat there and he waited for me to open up to him and he was stern when he needed to be. Truth of the fact is, I wouldn't have this stronger state of mind if it wasn't for him. He was such an inspiration to my life. In my sophomore days he was a senior and was off to college. We was in a log distance relationship. He stayed in West Virginia and I stayed in Florida. We was going together for 8 months before I left him, because I thought I haven't loved him anymore. Then later that September we got back together and saw each other in person for the first time in October. We made a bond like no other. And one thing I remember is when he told me he don't ever wanna live without me by his side..."I need you in my life" He would say. We was going so fine until the day he got in college. I got less attention and began to beg him and antagonize him because I didn't understand that being in college is time consuming. He then began to pay his attention to other guys. After we had a talk about it we was fine for our 1 year anniversary "one year down forever to go." I still remember him saying. Little did we know forever was just about to end...as time flew by he began to loose interest in me. He would call me too gay and tell me he don't like the way I dance or the way I dress. He'll say he didn't like my body being a certain way, but he would always be attracted to other guys that was just the same as what he didn't want in me. He would like their pics, text and call them. And we've had multiple falling outs about it. Finally I understood that he felt I didn't appreciate him is why he was distant from me. I gave in to my faults and offered to fix the situation. He agreed but would never let me. He would either ignore me, be rude to me or just act like I don't even exist. Or like I'm just an associate. This has been going on for months. A week ago he said he wasn't in love with me anymore. Today, March 13, 2016 I am a single broken hearted man. We've been through the hell and back together. We've lost friends for each other. His dad won't talk to him and my mom rebuke me. We both don't get along with our families because of the way they treat us. I've never had a shoulder to lean on. He's all I have...now I have nothing...once again my heart is broken and he don't even care anymore. I've cried so many times and he didn't care. I don't know what to do. I'm hurt. AGAIN...


       

Prvnce

March 13, 2016 @ (Florida )

Tags: bad breakups, heart broken


Growing up, I've never had a sexual preference. I was always afraid to tell people because I knew no one would understand. Then my 10th grade year in highschool, I met the perfect being, the "love of my life". We started talking December 28th and made it official January 1st at 12:04. We've had a bumpy road. I always was so used to being heart broken that I didn't know how to love anymore or even appreciate it when it's shown to me. But he sat there and he waited for me to open up to him and he was stern when he needed to be. Truth of the fact is, I wouldn't have this stronger state of mind if it wasn't for him. He was such an inspiration to my life. In my sophomore days he was a senior and was off to college. We was in a log distance relationship. He stayed in West Virginia and I stayed in Florida. We was going together for 8 months before I left him, because I thought I haven't loved him anymore. Then later that September we got back together and saw each other in person for the first time in October. We made a bond like no other. And one thing I remember is when he told me he don't ever wanna live without me by his side..."I need you in my life" He would say. We was going so fine until the day he got in college. I got less attention and began to beg him and antagonize him because I didn't understand that being in college is time consuming. He then began to pay his attention to other guys. After we had a talk about it we was fine for our 1 year anniversary "one year down forever to go." I still remember him saying. Little did we know forever was just about to end...as time flew by he began to loose interest in me. He would call me too gay and tell me he don't like the way I dance or the way I dress. He'll say he didn't like my body being a certain way, but he would always be attracted to other guys that was just the same as what he didn't want in me. He would like their pics, text and call them. And we've had multiple falling outs about it. Finally I understood that he felt I didn't appreciate him is why he was distant from me. I gave in to my faults and offered to fix the situation. He agreed but would never let me. He would either ignore me, be rude to me or just act like I don't even exist. Or like I'm just an associate. This has been going on for months. A week ago he said he wasn't in love with me anymore. Today, March 13, 2016 I am a single broken hearted man. We've been through the hell and back together. We've lost friends for each other. His dad won't talk to him and my mom rebuke me. We both don't get along with our families because of the way they treat us. I've never had a shoulder to lean on. He's all I have...now I have nothing...once again my heart is broken and he don't even care anymore. I've cried so many times and he didn't care. I don't know what to do. I'm hurt. AGAIN...


       

Kevin

February 26, 2016 @ (Netherlands)

Tags: Crying, Heartless, Brother, Long-Distance, Love, Unfair


I met a girl on a app, The connection made in the very beginning was a special one even though we were more than 10000 KM apart. It was wonderful, We had ideas for the future until her brother found out and made her break up with me not long ago, Nearly banning full contact with me. How can someone be so heartless? Still slightly crying while reading back those messages with her, Hoping one day when she is free from him, that she can continue with me.

Anyone else had those kinds of breakups? And what do you think about family forcing breakups?


       

Jadine

February 14, 2016 @ (Sask)

Tags: sad, valentines day, asshole


It's quite funny actually, as I have already posted on this site before with a brief submission on Jan 28, 2014. My first post was about my first boyfriend. We ended up getting back together on and off for about another 8 months before things finally ended for good (thank god!)
Looking back, I don't know why I was so sad. I just think it was because we had dated for 2 years, and he knew me inside out. But I wasn't serious about him, I know I could never end up with someone like him. After the breakup, I didn't expect to get into a relationship for a long time, maybe years. But only a few short months later my dream guy came along, someone I never thought would notice me.
He was amazing; 6'4", incredibly handsome, polite, smart, sweet, funny. I was in shock. I don't know if I ever had anyone on such a high pedestal before. And he wanted me back. Life, at that time, seemed like a dream come true, and I think that's where I ruined myself. I made HIM my dream. But I loved him so much and I was still in awe of everything he did. And all was well until moving away to a different city so I could go to university after only 4 months of dating.
Things changed. He changed. His true colors came out while living together. A once caring, dreamy person became cold, distant and indifferent. I had gained 15 pounds in the 6 months after university, and it apparently caused a huge problem for him (as he told me- "I would treat you better if you were thinner"). He would only return some of my texts, and got annoyed of me easily. The first 5 months living together were difficult, feeling like I was always reaching for him and he was just pulling away. I cried all the time. Looking back, after moving in that's mostly what I did with my time.
We've been broken up for a month now, but still living together because we signed into a lease. I've been trying to keep it civil but he seems to like hurting me constantly. A day doesn't go by without some sort of remark like "I enjoy this place when you're not here" or "you're not going to lose weight just watching a show about vegetables". After we agreed to try and be friends. Obviously it's hardest for me as I still care a great deal and he doesn't care at all, but yet I still try. I wake up everyday knowing that there's just going to be another heartbreaking moment. And every so often I think back to how it was in the beginning, everything was so perfect. I didn't want it to end up like this. What helps me to keep moving forward is to look at his attitude, he's treating me like dirt. And for what? All I did in our relationship was want to grow our love into something huge, but he couldn't see my value. I ask him what went wrong, he comes up with minuscule excuses such as "you never made me a friendship bracelet when you said you would" or "you turned on the light when I was sleeping". It's all a sad excuse to hide behind the real truth that he's shallow, and that once he saw me for my real self, without the nice body and makeup and clothes, he decided I wasn't good enough anymore. And i'm so glad that i'm stronger than I was 2 years ago, because no i'm not as sad as I was then, I've grown. I still cry sometimes, but I have to remember that I have the good heart, and important attributes to make love last, and him not being able to see that is HIS problem.


       

Lolita

February 09, 2016 @ (india)

Tags: breakup is good


I have known him from 8th class. He was the most flirtatious boy in my school.He was always behind my friend. I just hated him that time. We were in different classes until 10. Then for three years we were classmates. In plus one we both were absent for biology test paper.I was ill and he was lazy. However next day teacher prepared a new question paper. Only two of us were in the classroom. That was the first time he noticed me and asked me to show the answers. But i didn't help him. Because i just hated him.But after that we started talking and towards the end of school life we became best friends. He always flirted with other girls but was a genuine friend to me which sparked my soul. After school we joined different colleges.I felt very lonely those days and i don't had any phone for communication. After one year i was the one who proposed him. To my surprise he said he too feel the same for me. I was in cloud nine. Only communication was through messages. So yes somehow it was a long distance relation. We were from different religion which is a big problem in India even now. So we had a doubt about our future. Anyhow i loved him wholeheartedly. I thought he too loves me badly. But then i heard the gossip. I have a best friend from school other than my lover. he told me that my lover is having an affair with another girl. I didn't took it seriously then. But slowly i found he is not talking to me much. Then one day he told me that he loves someone else. How do you feel when you hear something like this from the one whom you love most? Yes it was terrible. It broke my heart and soul. I was numb for almost one year. Nothing was okay. It was my final year in college and i got very low marks.I never hid anything from my parents. I was afraid to face them. I was feeling very guilty. I was not okay until my post graduation. After that i gave myself a reality check. In between this i forgot about my family,my dreams and myself. It's been four years after breakup. I changed myself completely. I have lot of dreams to achieve. I am on a chasing mode now. My wrong and right decisions made myself complete. Now i don't fell any guilt or something anymore. But after that i never fallen in love. Even an infatuation scare the hell out of me. I am happy as single. I have a word for those broken hearts out there. Let him or her go. Tomorrow is always a new day. These moments will never come back. Be happy and always stay with your family.
Thanks for reading (i'm little bit weak in English.Sorry for that)


       

Enoth

January 28, 2016 @ (Dubai)

Tags: LDR


It was a long distance relationship that lasted for three years. I was too excited about meeting her in April for the first time after the stuff we shared together. I loved her a lot, and she was my motivation. I can say my life was turned upside down; I just didn't want to be an ordinary boyfriend for her, I mastered three languages, I became top of my class, and I was accepted for almost a position. I wanted to just do more with myself so that I can be worthy of her before I propose. Anyway, then three months ago, she developed a habit of not talking/texting me for days, and the reason was she doesn't want to interrupt my studies. Then, she would start meaningless arguments. Until, one day, she suddenly started saying that I never was any good for her, and she owes me nothing. That was right after she graduated, and she never talked ever since, deleting my numbers, every other thing except facebook. Then, I woke up one day about a month later, seeing her sharing a post of a quote "it's unlikely for a girl with high standard like me to date a piece of sh*t". I just liked her post, and I understood the message. It didn't take long for me to remove her before she would have done herself. Though, I would sometimes stare at my whatsapp screen on her number, waiting to see her status changing to online so that I know she is alright. It gives me some remedy, and as a matter of fact I am thankful because I was put on the right track because of her, I still owe her something, however.


       

Petula

December 29, 2015 @ (UK)

Tags: funny, first love


Met my ex-boyfriend who was going into the army. We hit it off, I knew I didn't want to stay with him whilst he went into the army. So off he went 5 months later, I broke it off. He refused to accept it and so before Xmas I dumped him once again face to face, then again at New Year via phone...and then we went around in circles until Valentines Day came around and I freaked and ended it via text. He dropped off my Valentines Day present to my Mum's house which was months supplies of canned fish and canned food. I kinda felt awful! Still think of him 6 years later, but realise I was just too immature to cope with it all!