Searching for "horrible break-up"

1 Results For 'horrible break-up'

Keijo

March 31, 2015 @ (Estonia)

I met my love of my life about 5-6 years ago but didn't know that back then. We used to chat a lot but somehow this chatting faded. About a year ago we started talking to each other again. For a while it was a normal, everyday friends talk but at one moment I felt that she was the one who was meant for me and I said I had feelings for her. She was kind of shocked but I believe in a good way. This truly was the best feeling in my 19 years. So, eventually we were together and everyday I fell deeper in love. This feeling was undescribable. I genuinely was the happiest man on earth. Everything was great and we were happy. But since we were living quite far from each other things started going not so well. We argued about pointless things, both being extremely stubborn. About 6 months our relationship had ups and downs but it really didn't matter because she was still my little princess and i loved her even more. About 3 weeks ago, we had a horrific quarrel which ended with me saying that she was disgusting. It was said because of the emotion that i had at that time. I had never felt so bad in my life. Honestly, i wanted to kill myself because of that saying. After that she obviously was angry and disappointed in me and she had all the reasons in the world to be mad at me because, after all i was a complete jerk. So i apologized about 100 times. A bit later i thought everything was okay until today. She had been aloof, she didn't talk to me as often as she used to. I thought it was about me... And then the painful reality struck. I asked why is she behaving like that and she told that... When I said that bad thing to her, she was so shooked up, she went to a nightclub, had drinks and one thing led to another.. she kissed another man. And she had held that in her all that time. I was devastated, i didn't know what to do. She was so embarrassed about what she did and didn't want to be with me anymore because of that one mistake. She isn't that type of girl who kisses random guys. She knows it and I know it. I said that i forgive her but it wasn't enough. My heart is broken, shattered to pieces. Since she was my everything, I really don't know how am I gonna live on. I truly hope that she changes her mind and that love against me is stronger than feeling guilty about what was done.
I really love her. I don't know what to do...