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Raisin Girl

September 08, 2015 @ (Canada)

Me
I will start off by saying my whole life I have been shy. Anytime someone hinted at me liking them, I ignored it, and denied it convincingly!
People at school called me prude. I was a "good girl" even though I just wanted what everyone else wanted! Just no way to get to it. I was called asexual.
It was in 11th grade I got close to a guy.
I was not afraid to talk to him. We talked a lot. He asked me out. I was so excited! How did he know i liked him? I said yes.
But...
Then he changed his mind because I don't drink! Yes, it is true. But, I said I don't care if you do! No, it was late. I found out later he is bisexual.

Later 1 year I decided I have to have a guy. I went out to events like concerts and stuff to make myself available. I kept seeing this guy with long brown hair and metal t shirts. He looked so... Unique.
And he didn't go to my school.
Somehow he messaged me on myspace. I guess he saw I liked pantera. Well, talk here, talk there. I just wanted one thing but didn't want to seem too slutty. So, I gathered this was my only chance. I waited months before he told me he didn't think I was that kind of girl. A cornflake girl. That I don't have bad thoughts.
He asked me out. I was confused. I just wanted to do it, not be in a confusing relationship. Well, I thought this must be how it is. We hung out, kissed, but he told me it is ok to wait till marriage to do it. I was like what!
So we did do it quite a bit. He was fascinated that he "stole my virginity" which is kind of sick. Why do people obsess about this? I became attached to him strangely. Even though he was not charming in the slightest! Love.
Jump 1 year later at university, I met a muslim woman. She told me about Islam and it rang with my beliefs, so I became a muslim. One who worships God and only God. Who is not like anything or any one. This was after a year of meeting my muslim friend.

That news did not go ove with my bf of 2 years who is ATHEIST. We talked, we cried. We tried to work things out. There was no way he would believe in God, so he broke up with me. It was not allowed for me to be with him anyway, so it was for the best. It took awhile to get over him. Maybe few months especially after he tried pushing my buttons.

I don't know if he ever got over me. I stopped talking to him as muslim men and women are not supposed to chit chat with the opposite sex outside marriage and family. I never told anyone the reason for breaking up, just that it did not work out because I didn't tell them I was muslim yet.

But, I am married and have kids with a wonderful muslim husband for 7 years now. He is the best. He treats me like a queen.

Myfault

September 04, 2015 @ (Coachella Valley)

Tags: dumped

I met this girl through a weekly meeting that talked about mental illness. I saw her beautiful, delicate pale skin compliment her dark hair. She was with another guy who I thought was her boyfriend. I was instantly enticed by her looks. Her silence was soft and spoke with such force that it shook me off my feet. I felt nervous and she did not even flinch to look at me while I talked. Damn I did not have a car at the time so I had to take the bus home. I missed my stop all because I was fantasizing about me being with her. Then as I looked back at my stop I came to the realization that I would probably never get a chance to even hangout with her. I fell hard just by her looks and it was not that she was a ten it was just her. Yeah, she is beautiful but her face oh her face just captured me like the moon captures the moth. weeks passed and I did not see her because she was busy with college. luckily I befriended her friend who was actually just childhood friends. I liked him alot and thanks to knowing him I got a chance at getting closer to this girl. who's name I did not know until he told me. By pure luck I got a chance to finally be alone with her and as I spoke I began to see that she looked at me differently. As she spoke i only fell deeper and deeper into her sweet eyes. we stayed up all night in th back of her car and i thought that maye I did have a chance. And I did. we fell in love but it woudnt last. She would break up with me for trivial reasons. later on I figured out she was insecure. New years eve we had a huge fight,I fel unappreciated and I finally put an end to it. She came back that same night which wass surprising because it was always me who had to but I was not. She said she would change because she actually loved me and she had never felt that way. Change she did some how she became even more perfect but I messed it up. still hurt from the past I treated her bad and I began to think I no longer needed her. I was a bad boyfriend for 6 months and she finally left. She no longer cared for me. And it is true that you only miss them once you let them go. I realized my mistakes and I tried for three months I was exasperated and exhausted but I kept trying. She was hurt. She did not trust me. I know I messed up and she has every right to leave. I would give her all the time in the world and I would still be here waiting for her. this was the first week of fall semester in college. it fees so different. today was the day I finally let go and I am so hurt I cant go to sleep Im crying and I dont know why. I hve been through some messed up shit in my life but even that did not cause me to cry. I cry because she is truly amazing and actually wanted me but I broke her. I have one last plan. I am finally going to give her space. I will work on myself and do my best to try and get a date with her. Sadly she is moving to either New york or san fransico in a year. I may never have another chance, sadly she said she would stay here with me until I finished with college. She is the type of girl to get over guys quick. she told me she would be over me in a week. Sadly I would be with her right now if in those 6 months I would tell her to leave me alone I Instead apologized and told her how much she meant to me.

Pierre

September 02, 2015 @ (france)

Tags: break up

Here goes it going to ne long.

I mst this girl on august 15 2014, I was working at work a hotel where i was working the night shift and she walks in with her daughter.10 years old.
She put her daughter to bed in the hotel and she came down and spoke to me , we had sex .
She game me her number we met up on the next day in a restaurant , then she stayed at mine for 4 nights with her daughter, everyday while sh was at mine she said tomorrow I am leaving , but she stayed.
She lives 150 miles from me so on weekends I would see her and most weekends on a monday morning she would say I want you to leave then when I leave she would say I love you .
Her daughter would cry at night if her mother stayed up with me , if she went to bed she would not.
One night her mother got angry through out her daughter on the street , I tried to bring her in but her mother said no.Finally she brought her in and she smashed her place up plates and glasses and furtuinre then she said I have had enough she took her car and wanted to commit suicide.
Me and the daughter cleaned up the place 10 mins later she came back and said now the daughters a sleep. she then through me out at 01:00 no taxi in the area and my phone was dead. after 30 mins she let me back in the house.this was in around nov 2014.

I still went back on weekends and sometimes it was ok sometimes she wanted me to leave.

She has been to my house a few times, she would have a go saying I am always on the phone, so I thrw the phone outside . and she went quite.

Sometimes at mine she would say I dont like it hear. I want to go home so I would drive her back home and then next day she said she loves me.

I used to pay for her shopping buy her found even though we are both working.

She used to coplain about my hair my clothes, her life and her daughter her family.

One time she said she tried to commit suicde from a 3rd floor window.
We booked a weekend to Paris away I booked train tickets and hotels 4 days before she said I am not going with you . so I lost money on train ticket but got hotel cancelled ok.
weeks later we went with my son and her daughetr and her to paris for 5 days. 1st day she complained about the room, she walked out half way out of a meal. I payed for all the stuff in paris she did not give me the money for her part I finally said its ok..because everyday she said I will give it to you.

after Paris she did not speak to me and 4 days later she said she loves me .

My sons grandfather passed away in august 2015. My ex (sons mother) had to orgnaise everything also she had to change appointements for drs for my son before he returns back to school. MY girfriend got upset said we dont have hoildays together and we have 1 week off and your ex did it on purpose to change dayes, I said no because her father died.

Anyway, she has split up with me for that also she said, because I work the night shift and I tried to stay at your place I cant .

My son was happy I split up with her and sent her 2 text messages and she was unhappy about him saying hes happy we split up.

She then told me its finished I should go and fuck my self .

I miss her no idea why after everything. I have not written everything because thier was so many tantrums and her having a go at me .

Sometimes I feel sad , I just want to speak to her , I miss the sex and this was my 1st realtionship since 8 years

D

August 24, 2015 @ (India)

Tags: So sorry!

We were close friends... but eventually friendship turned to love..he loved me soo much..so did I ..after school we got together.. we met once every month, spoke every day...he sent me his pics.. everything was perfect...until now..just a few weeks back in july 2015... i sent him a collage with our pics and a message..after that i was having my important university examination ( Medicine) so i could not call or text him much..but still i felt that he was avoiding me.. in the midst i tried texting and calling him a zillion times... he never answered my calls..neither did he respond to my text messages... but i was not ready to believe that he would cheat on me... i contacted our school friends..i mean we all were pretty close.. i told them that he was doing this..they told me that they have also stopped getting information from him.. i was alarmed.. they said don't worry and don't spoil your exams..thankfully in the midst of so much anxiety i was able to do my most important exams in life..... and he had told one of my friends who called him upon hearing my complains..the truth behind his avoidance.. but she refused to tell me.. because she was scared of me spoiling my exams..i understood that something was terribly wrong..i waited..yesterday at last my exams got over... she called me at 11:00pm... it was a conference call..three friends... she began.. i listened... his parents saw the collage... his mom cried...and stopped talking to him for two days..his dad still doesn't speak to him... he was beaten... they feel that this is not a serious relationship..and that their son is giving me false hopes..iam a doctor..he is studying for Bcom... his mom said all these.. her parents will never agree..you are playing with her feelings..you will never get settled before her..allow her to live... :'( and made him promise upon Holy Quran .. that he won't speak to me or see me again.. he has decided to lead a bachelor life... :( i cried bitterly... i was helpless..so was he... if he had cheated on me..i could at least hate him.. but we still love each other soo much and yet....i spent sleepless nights..i can't cope....we could not hear each others voices for one last time.. :( ... I don't wanna be any one else's but his... and yes,,, i will wait... i will wait for him... i won't let him go... let me ask my parents when it's time.... the rest I leave to God..... My God had never disappointed me... and I believe in him.. he won't disappoint me any further... Cuz it's our first love.. and I want it to be our first and only love..... <3

Fate

August 23, 2015 @ (NY)

Tags: bad break up toxic love lonely depressed loveless

We started to date back in February and it was long distance, I convinced him to come to my college. He moved into my family house and stayed with me, I had work so he'd stay home with my little sister. Who is 3 years younger than us. He fell in love with her, I told him to please stop being foolish and think about our future plans...when I put all my trust in him I saw he was acting weird and questioned him...only to find out he kissed her...multiple times... we broke up then. And he's been living in my house since, I'm sitting here watching them fall in love while my love was just thrown away like paper. I told him to leave several times but he'd make me feel bad about bring him here and abandoning him. I'm in so much pain. I decide to separate the two and he calls me a bitch and mean names. Sad thing is I still love him I cant throw away 7months like that.

Broken

August 22, 2015 @ (doha)

Tags: help

i need help.. i love my bf allot and he loves me allott we had lots of moments together then a day came and his mom asked me to leave him, never talk to him again , like forget him ,she said if i didnt leave him she will put me in lots lots of troubles its his mom and i shall respect her i cant say no to his mom but at the same time i cant leave him.. do u think i shall listen to his mom or stay with him??

Al

August 22, 2015 @ (usa)

Tags: regret

Long-distance relationship. we both loved each other very much but she didnt have time for me. i got mad at her for not caming with me during her summer vacation but i didnt let her know why i am mad cuz i wanted her to find out on her own( my biggest mistake was testing her if she could find out on her own). she had some family members that were seriously ill and she was feeling down. i couldnt talk to her due to my work and she texted me about how bad she was feeling but due to bad connection i never recieved the text and i guess that really hit her and she started to hate and broke up with me but maybe if i had been in touch with her she would be still with me.

My advice is never ever hide the reason for acting mad to your partner and having wishful thinking he or she will never break up with you no matter how much u push them over the limit. i wish i could turn back time and make different choices. All i have in my life is regret.

Nate

August 03, 2015 @ (europe)

Tags: Bad break up

Once upon a time I was dating a girl for a few months, I was in love with her and was really enjoying it. We had our ups and down , on the last month though we were doing pretty well. until the summer break came , so we were going to spend about a month apart, in our hometowns. A few days after she left she started to show some kind of unconcern about me, and phone calls reduced. the duration of phone calls also reduced. I understood that things were going bad, even I was complained some times to her .But I believed that it was just the distance, or that I was overreacting and overthinking it. I was very sad, angry and unsecure at that time but I tried not to show it, most of the times, not to make things worse and I just waited to get back together to see what is actually going on. But the last few days before we return to the city we were studying, she started to talk to me really cold on the phone without any obvious reason. So I decided not to talk to her again and see how far this apathy and unconcern goes. So one day we closed the phone, and didn't call her again. Neither did she. She detached and then she got lost, just like that... So I decided after a few days to call her, as I knew she had already arived, and I asked her to meet and talked,she agreed but she said she was very busy with going out with friends and she told me me that she wasn't sure about when we are going to meet. This was very offensive, I felt very bad that it was so hard for her to find 20 minutes to discuss with me the problem..just because she was going out a lot with friends. I was sure then that we were breaking up, So the next day I just sent her a text and I said her that we were breaking up, with the hope that if it was important for her to be together, she would try a just a bit. But she replied and said that she also wanted to break up. My heart teared apart at that time. Something that once was good, ended with a 2-lines text and a goodbye. I am very sad about it, some day I will feel better I suppose, but today is not that day.

I talk to people about it and most of them act like it's nothing, and respond to me with stuff like you will find another one etc. At first I was feeling but about being so hurt, but a loss like this causes pain , and it feels better now that I accepted that pain is just normal in cases like this and eventually it will pass, but not today.

Ash

July 26, 2015 @ (manila)

Tags: Sad breakup

i met a man that i fall inlove with. But he's always been a player and a womaniser. He hurt me emotionally many times since the beginning. But i still keep believing on him though i have so many doubts. He cheated on me so i decided to break up with him and i never contact him again since we were on long distance relationship at that moment. Every after a week i will receive a message from saying he made a big mistake and he hopes to see me again. Apologising but still i didnt accept him for almost 10 months. All this time im still inlove with him and i really dont know why. I always wish to see him again and be with him. One day he miscalled me and we started talking again. He came to see me right away to make things right, thats what he said. It was good, we were very happy together. Now he have to leave again for few months for work, back to long distance relationship again. I always worry about it coz i know its possible for him to do the same thing he did to me before. He knows how much i wanted him so he took it for granted. Well i found out again that he's entertaining someone other than me, and he's been lying to me all the time. Though he always tell me about being serious about me and promising that someday we will be together marrying me and have kids, everything which is really good to hear. When i found out about the other girl, he goes defensive and everything was messed up. So we decided again to finish the relationship, i dont know why he's the one who gets mad after i found out about what he did. Telling me that i should've not talk to the girl and ask questions about what is going on between them since the girl told me that she's his girlfriend and been talkimg for 2 months already. My ex now tries to make up things about what is really going on. I hate the fact that im so inlove with him that i let him broke my heart into so many pieces. I wanted to forget him.

Jenny

July 05, 2015 @ (Uk)

Tags: #sad #horrible #heartbroken

I met this girl after I have just been out from a heart break relationship that lasted 3 years. Everything seemed perfect, we were so inlove and we literally spoke, seen eachother every single night. We never skipped a day for full two years. She literally was my everything, and I believed I was hers. Two months ago she started acting really weird and going out a lot at night (to party she said). I believed her but I always knew deep inside there was something wrong. She started to get so distant that I couldn't even reach her on her phone. Her parents kicked her out she said because she had a huge argument with them. I was so supportive, I called her and talked for ages to give her advice and even suggested to talk with her parents to convince them to take her in again. Days after that I get surprised she blocked me from facebook and Instagram, I was in shock and thought it was something wrong with my device, so I logged in with my friend's account to see her updated her new relationship with another girl. And posted their picture together with hash tag #Lover her my girl forever. I was deeply hurt and so heart broken that I couldn't eat for weeks and everytime I remember her or picture her with her new gf together made me literally sick. I couldn't smile, couldn't eat or do anything for weeks. Later that week I got my university results and I failed after two years of studying which made me feel even worse. I asked her why she did this to me and why couldn't she just respect me enough to tell me the truth from the start. Turned out her parents didn't even kick her out and it was all a play. Her bestfriend sent me a cruel long text telling me to leave her alone and that she doesn't want me anymore and called me every name in the book. I was so heart broken that I couldn't even speak or cry. She then tried to contact me after I left wishing her luck saying she still loves me and that her new girl was just a rebound. I believed her because I was desprate and talker to her again. At the end of that week she tells me that she broke her phone and that she can't talk to me until next week, and of course I didn't believe her considering all the lies she previously told me. I checked up her facebook and she updated a status of her meeting up her rebound girlfriend and them going camping for a week. I now cut her off completely, I ignore her texts and calls. I now am more grown up and ready to move on for good.