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I Hated This.

August 25, 2014 @ (Mishawaka)

Tags: bad breakup, sad breakup, middle school dating

Here's to make it easier. Guy will be "A" because that's what his name starts with. "T" for friend number one. "E" for friend number two. "L" for supposedly friend. "V" for really good friend. "S" for other really good friend. Hope it's somewhat easy to understand.

Okay, so, it was April 12 and I was with T. It was T's little cousin's birthday party. That's when A asked me out. It was 12:56 am. We were all in a hotel. Me, T, E, and T's little cousin and aunt. A was texting me and he asked me out. I felt really bad because I was lying to my parents. I wasn't supposed to date. Nineteen hours later, I broke up with him. This is barely the start of this. The next day at school, L said it looked like A was about to cry. At the time, L was dating somebody. So, I got really upset and felt really bad. I cried for like an hour. It was really bad. Makeup was running down my face and everything. I kept blaming everything on me. It didn't help because just when I thought I was going to stop crying before passing periods, I cried right when I got into fourth hour. The hour I had with A. I took one look at him and I just hugged my friend and just cried onto her shoulder. Everybody was asking if I was okay. Thanks for sympathy but I don't want everybody worrying about me. So, then I went down to guidance and talked about it. When I got back, he kept looking at me. I knew he was, and I didn't even have to look at him. He texted me after school. He wanted me to talk to him. I felt bad because I knew that I had to have hurt his feelings. He said he didn't hate me. He said he could never hate me. Two weeks later to April 25. We started dating again. He said that I was his background and so much cute stuff and honestly I didn't know he could be heartless. But, I found out that he could. It was sometime in May and I broke up with him. One, because he liked my friend and my friend liked him back. That same day I broke up with him, he went out with L. Who does that? So, I told him not to talk to me at school or anything. So neither of them did. For a week until they asked if I was still mad at them. Um, yes. So I texted him and asked him what he wanted to talk to me about. He said he wanted us all to be friends again and I said I wasn't friend's with either of them. So, then the next day he told my friend that he could care less about me. I texted him and said, "This is exactly why I said I didn't want to be friends with you again." He told me to stop texting him then. I cussed at him and I just basically yelled at him over text. His reply, and yes I barely did anything but stick up for myself and he said, "Good, now go die in a hole now and stop f*cking texting me." I lost it. I was crying and crying. The next day, I was trying to read the messages to V and S and right when I got to that text, I started crying. I couldn't even read it. It was so hard to focus. And still, he said he didn't care if I died. He meant everything he said to me, and that he wouldn't take any of it back. After like a month maybe, he decided to apologize. Like, I'm sorry, but it's a little late. To this day, I still do not talk to him.