Shavel

May 16, 2014 @ (Florida)

Tags: Heartbroken


I've been with this guy name Nicholas for 1 1/2 years. We met in middle school, I didn't really notice him or liked him. It all started our sophomore year of high school. I didn't even know he went to my school but anyways we end up having my favorite subject together. He was just a friend to me, nothing more, nothing less. One day my teacher sat us together and we was watching a movie. I felt this weird feeling towards him that I never felt before. I wanted to hold his hand and touch him. To me he was unattractive. Maybe because I was trying to get back with my ex at the moment and still had feelings for. We both played basketball btw. One day after my basketball game my ex told me he didn't wanna talk to me no more ect. So I decided to call Nicholas because I was lonely and wanted to talk to someone to not think about my ex. I called him and he was at a basketball game watching another school play. He went outside just to talk to me. I started flirting with him without knowing it.
The next morning I went to school and I couldn't believe wat I've did last night. I didn't like him nor wanna talk to him.
It felt so wired in that class and I usually spoke a lot in that class and now I started not to.
2 months passed by and he wanted to go out with me but I would always tell him I'm not ready to date or I'm still hung up on my ex but he still waited for me to be ready.
We talked for 2 months before making it official. He asked me out on January 8 .
I always been bad lucked with guys so this one I was scared to give my all. I wasn't really into it like he was but after a couple months I grew to love him. He was my everything, my best friend, just my world and I was his. Not a day goes by that I didn't get a good morning / goodnight text. He made everyday worth being happy for. He made me realize a lot in myself. We shared everything. I use to give him money and he did the same to me, we use to cook each other lunch, just simply take care of each other. Everyday was a happy day for me and him. But u might be wondering it seems like u guys love each other a lot , y would u guys break up? Well I have a lot of insecurity because of my past relationships, I never thought I was good enough or pretty enough to be his gf. He told me stop thinking like that Cus I'm the only women he sees and loves. I met his family. He showed me off to the world. Say I was his queen ect. He motivated me to do better in the sports I play. We filled out scholarships for each other. Motivated each other in everything we did. He have put up with a lot I've done. He was tierd of me putting ppl in our relationship, assuming he was doing things behind my back( cheating) which he never did nor talk to someone different but I was so insecure. He got fed up and left me and now I've realize what I've lost. I've lost my motivator, best friend, my happiness. I pray everyday we get back together. We've been broken up for a week now and it feels like a year. My room is full of things he bought me. Sometimes he only had enough money for a haircut but he gave me that money so I can eat and he don't get money often. I just wanna show him that my insecurities are gone and my assumption too. Just us breaking up made me realize how much I needed to change but I told him I would always change and I never did but the time I really changed he doesn't believed me because I've said it a bunch of times. I would like for u guys to pray for us to work things out because ever since I lost him, I've lost my happiness, my motivation, and most importantly the love of my life


       


 

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