Tags: So sorry!
We were close friends... but eventually friendship turned to love..he loved me soo much..so did I ..after school we got together.. we met once every month, spoke every day...he sent me his pics.. everything was perfect...until now..just a few weeks back in july 2015... i sent him a collage with our pics and a message..after that i was having my important university examination ( Medicine) so i could not call or text him much..but still i felt that he was avoiding me.. in the midst i tried texting and calling him a zillion times... he never answered my calls..neither did he respond to my text messages... but i was not ready to believe that he would cheat on me... i contacted our school friends..i mean we all were pretty close.. i told them that he was doing this..they told me that they have also stopped getting information from him.. i was alarmed.. they said don't worry and don't spoil your exams..thankfully in the midst of so much anxiety i was able to do my most important exams in life..... and he had told one of my friends who called him upon hearing my complains..the truth behind his avoidance.. but she refused to tell me.. because she was scared of me spoiling my exams..i understood that something was terribly wrong..i waited..yesterday at last my exams got over... she called me at 11:00pm... it was a conference call..three friends... she began.. i listened... his parents saw the collage... his mom cried...and stopped talking to him for two days..his dad still doesn't speak to him... he was beaten... they feel that this is not a serious relationship..and that their son is giving me false hopes..iam a doctor..he is studying for Bcom... his mom said all these.. her parents will never agree..you are playing with her feelings..you will never get settled before her..allow her to live... :'( and made him promise upon Holy Quran .. that he won't speak to me or see me again.. he has decided to lead a bachelor life... :( i cried bitterly... i was helpless..so was he... if he had cheated on me..i could at least hate him.. but we still love each other soo much and yet....i spent sleepless nights..i can't cope....we could not hear each others voices for one last time.. :( ... I don't wanna be any one else's but his... and yes,,, i will wait... i will wait for him... i won't let him go... let me ask my parents when it's time.... the rest I leave to God..... My God had never disappointed me... and I believe in him.. he won't disappoint me any further... Cuz it's our first love.. and I want it to be our first and only love..... <3
Tags: It hurts
So about 4 years ago i meet this awsome girl that i fell in love with at a friends party. We keept meeting for coffie and just to talk. She had a boyfriend at the time. Then after awhile she cheated, with me. So her boyfriend threw her out, and i took her in. We moved to a flat after a year and was happy. Started about thinking of kids. Tryd to get kids, but we just couldnt. So doctors and all that started to found out what and so one. We was happy. Thought of might buy a apartment and just live our life to the fullest as we could. Then after 3,5 year into our relationship, my dad had a stroke. He didnt die, but was half paralyzed the first week.. My gf had allready ordred a few week befor a trip to her brother. So she and her mother went to her brother about 1 week after my dad had hes stoke. She comes home a week after, and everthing is as normal from her side atleast. 4 weeks after she get drunk at a party where she told a m8 of mine that she had cheated on me to. I was gonna ask for her hand the next year.... my life fell totaly apart.. kids. marriage.. how she supported me when my dad got his stoke.. 40 hours after she phoned me from that party and told me, she was out of the flat we rented. I even help her move to her new appartment. 5 months after just abit contact between me and her she calls me and ask if i could see a future with her now, cos she had a new job offer at another ciity, and ask if i could move with her. Im still inlove with her. I throw everything aside and say yes. Only thing is that she is kinda in a relasonship with someone else.. But we have a long chat, and even kissed. It feelt so god to smell her, taste her lips, and just holding her. Next weekend comes and she is gonna break up with her boyfriend. atleast that is what she tells me. Monday comes. And she ask if we can be friends, and stay friends..My hearth get ript out of me, and she jumps on it and put it back again.. She didnt break up with the boyfriend she have now, but have cheated on him after just a few months. I know the saying, once a cheater always a cheater, but i just cant hate her. I want to so bad but just cant. not even after all this. And belive me that this is just the really short version of this story, cos my english is bad i have skip alot..
But still..
I love her.. And the feeling that im not gonna be with her is eating me up...Im 35 years old. She is 33. and This last part happend just 14 days ago..I really just want to disapear..
Tags: bad breakup
I was dating a guy and right after we got to third base, he told me he was still a virgin and broke up with me because he felt like he's betraying God. we didn't even have sex.
July 9, 2013. the best day I've ever lived. I remember it so clearly. the day we met in person. the day we kissed. he was, and still is, the best person I've met. but I've learned a lot about great people since I met him. I learned that no one is all around perfect. he was like.. a sociopath. he always pretended to be completely faithful. I knew so much about him, even though I pretended not to. I knew in my heart that he was a sociopath. I guess I never put the pieces together.
more towards the end of us, I began to be very depressed. he said he just wanted me to be happy. but I think what he really wanted.. was for me to leave him alone. I was scared. I was scared that other girls were better than myself. he knew this about me.
so, we argued very much. one day we argued and he decided to "break up" with me, which was something that started happening recently. we would break up and get back together a few minutes later. this time though, he took it a step further. he talked to a girl that I specifically told him he could not talk to because they used to flirt with each other all the time. well, all I knew was that they had flirted, and I wasn't okay with that. but little did I know.
so, I talked to her. I apologized for being rude to her before because I never knew exactly what happened between the two of them. she told me exactly what happened. she said that he led her on for 3 months, WHILE he was dating me. she didn't know that he was dating me. she said that she gave him a few blow jobs and they went to the movies twice together. she said that she was under the impression that they were together. until one day, he told her that he was using her. he switched schools and stopped talking to her. she thought I knew about that, but I didn't. all I knew was that they spoke over snapchat and they flirted. maybe if I wasn't so oblivious about the whole thing, I would've known. I was just so in love, I guess. it wasn't something I wanted to believe.
so, after she told me this, I realized that I was just lied to for over a year.. by a guy that I thought cared about me. he looked me in my eyes and told me that he kissed 2 girls in his life. he looked me in my eyes and told me nothing happened between them. I should have known. it hurt me for so long just to know that he flirted with her because it was something he didn't even feel guilty about. I don't understand how he could do something like this to me.
and now it feels like I spent a year and seven months of my life on someone who didn't care about me very much. someone who pretended. and every happy memory is just like trash. it's useless to me but it hurts me so bad. everywhere I go, I remember what him
Tags: What
Hi I am gonna break up soon. It is just about on its way. I could not say this guy is my boyfriend because we never in any kind of relationship. We are not girlfriend and boyfriend. We are not in an open relationship. We are not in partnership. Do you think we could call it non string sex relationship ? But we are for beyond this. I would not go for non string sex relationship with someone for more than 3 years. Will you? We love each other we have to break up because too many issues : age difference culture parents ...Honestly speaking he could not make me satisfied at all. Oh well what the hell... I have been thinking sex life does not really matter and I do enjoy the period of time he make my mind in peace. I think I should say thanks to him for giving me more that 3 years peaceful time. He does not wanna listen to his parents to get married as he said. Well also as he said he was not into marriage and kids. It seems like that we are really in common on these views. Anyway he said he could not leave his parents so I am the one he is gonna to leave. Mom's boy right? If I knew it He was mom's boy from the beginning I would not go further breaking up now. Ehem nothing to be regreted anyway I love him I have been loving him and I am still in love him It sounds very stupid for sure. However I am the one who believes still there must be Sth forever oh my god stupid again Anyway that is my story. By the way we are meeting up tonight. Sry guys my break up story to be continued ...
Tags: Bad break up, I still love him, First love
Our relationship was totally unexpected. Last september 2013, a guy that I had a teeny tiny bit of a crush asked me out unexpectedly. No clues, No everything. Out of shock, I started freaking out. I don't know what to do. My mind screamed no, but heart says yes! The reson why i don't want to go on is because im scared of my mom. Like really. She's the definition of a really strict mom. i was scared but then a thought crossed my mind.
Why not accept this? Everything happens for a reason right?
That's when I said Yes. For the first 2 weeks it was amazing. The sparks, the giddy butterflies in my tummy were there until my mom found out about him. It was horrifying. My mom was in range. My mom threatened me to talk to him in school. I was scared. I told her that I promise to break up witj. So I did. I explained to him everything. After a day, things were back together. We decided to mend things back together. I mean we aren't officially dating but you know what I mean? You can sense that something's still going on? Yup, that's it. October came, he stole my first kiss. It was magical. All I could ever think about is that I love him. That everything revolves around him. Its like he's my world. He's my strength yet he is also my weakness. Everything in him is just perfect. The way he surprises me with kisses.. The way he brought Gatorade just for me (Gatorade is my favorite drink, i just love that shit lol)
It was perfect. Everything was perfect. There are even times when he makes silly jokes or I took glances at him in class and im like 'shit, I love this guy' I was soo inlove. It was just.. Perfect. I never been so happy in my life. Everytime I woke up he's all I ever think about. He's cute 'Good Morning's'.. It made me cry, thinking about all those happy memories.
When christmas break came, he told me that his wifi router got broken.. Me, being the understanding girl that I am, understands him. I told him it was okay that he shouldn't worry about me.
(We talk and chat in Kik. We can't text since my mom checks my phone all the time)
One time, back at christmas break.. I was looking at my chat box in facebook but Something totally made me stop in my tracks. He was online. And he was usinh he's phone. I messaged him, i did everything but noo, he wouldn't reply anymore.. I don't know why. Christmas eve came, I kept on looking at my phone hoping that maybe he'd greet me a merry christmas but no, nothing came. It broke my heart. But one thing crossed my mind. I was like 'oh maybe he's wifi router is still destroyed'
New year came, I was waiting. Waiting for him to atleast greet me but no, nothing still came. It hurt me. It Crushed me .. to millions of pieces. But there's one thing that made me ball my eyes out.. He's close friend messaged me in facebook. He's like;
Happy new year __ ! How are you and him? I hope that this year is going to be a big blast for both of you. Best wishes. Haha don't forget im one of your #1 Fans of LYN! hahaha cx
That totally made me cry. I mean out of everything why that? Why his friend.? Its really heartbreaking to know that he's friend greeted me, while him? No. There was no effort. It crushed me. The way his friend says he want us to be good this year. It break me.
School came along, i tried not to approch him. Waiting for him to atleast apologize or say Hi, or ask me how my christmas break went but nothing. He never did. It crushed me. The next day, I tried talking to him but he was distant like he really is. He's bestfriend approached me and told me he wanted to talk. I listened. He's bestfriend told me the truth. He met a girl back at christmas break. He went to the movies with her and ate in a restaurant. It killed me. I was paralyzed in my seat. My breathing hitched. My face paled. My mind went blank. I felt like crying but my tears wouldn't fall. My eyes feel numb. My skin is on fire. I feel like someone just throwed me a bucket of lava. Just like that. It crushed me. I've lost weight. Im not the happy girl like before. Every recess or lunch, I don't mingle with my friends anymore. I just stay in the classroom, facing the wall, got my phone out and stay there till' its over. It crushed me. I'm not the bubble person that I am before. But you know what hurt me the most? He acted as if I never exist. It was like I was invinsible. That he couldn't see me. Just like that. There are times that I break down in class. I just couldn't help it. He looks soo happy without me. Huge smile in his face. And well, I also think that he has a crush on this girl.. He craves for her attention. He sits with her all the time in class. He talk about her all the time. I don't know what to do. Its killing me since we are classmates. I could see him everyday. Its hard to ignore him. It really is. It broke my heart. he is the love of my life. He's my everything. He's the only reason why I smile. Its hard. I mean he is after all my first love. My first ever boyfriend. My first kiss. It hurt me to know that another that I love, would leave me again. Like my dad. He left me. I mean sure, I got to see him and everything but it isn't like before. My dad has another daugther who is my half sister. My dad loves her so much. He wouldn't even bother to talk to me anymore. He wouldn't crave for our communication. When me and my dad's girlfriend fight, he always take her side. It kills me. Another guy who I love would leave me again. Wow, What did I do to deserve this? It kills me. Its almost a month now but im still not over him. He's all I could ever think about. I don't know what to do. I want the real me to be back again, but it wouldn't. Its hard to smile. He looks soo soo happy without me. It break me into millions of pieces. It made me realize that love is shitload of bullshit. I honestly don't believe in love anymore. I mean why? No matter how loving or caring that person is to you, they will break you in the end. Those people out there that are experiencing heartbreak, don't worry. Your not the only one. Im trying my hardest to stay strong. Let's just believe in ourself, have faith in God. And never say never
Tags: Break up
So I fell in love with this girl starting my freshmen year of high school. We were so happy together, she lives only lives 5 blocks away from me. We became best friends, and we promised each other that we would be high school sweet hearts and never leave each other. We dated all through high school for two and a half years. Starting my Senior year we started to be a little distance from each other. We started having a few problems and soon enough she broke up with me. The person a took for granted and thought would never leave, finally did it. I always thought we would keep those promises and be high school sweet hearts. We spent every day together and we never had a dull moment. She was the love of my life and I still can't seem to move on or run away from all this. I just want every little thing back. It's just so hard to get over somebody so if you're out there struggling you're not the only I promise. I think about this girl everyday and pray that one we'll get back together even though we're graduating here in May. But may god bless us with somebody here in the near future.
Lost Love
I broke up with my boyfriend two months ago. We were together for 1 year. I only have myself to blame. I knew our relationship wouldn’t work when we first started dating. We lived so far away from each other and we were so immature. It was too serious and we were too young. If I only knew then what I know now.
We would try to see each other every other week. For one year we did this. The bus trip took about six hours. At the time it didn’t matter because I got to see him at the end of the trip. When I finally saw him after those six long hours, I wouldn’t feel a thing. Our relationship was an illusion. We looked so cute in front of people but when we were alone we would always fight. The first six months was fine, but the other half was hell. We fought each night, even when we were not together. He would yell at me over the phone and I would yell back. When I said I didn’t want to do this anymore, he would push me on the bed and just lay on top of me hugging me and I would forget everything. I know he didn’t want me to go but we couldn’t keep on living like this. Things were bad…really bad and something had to change.
One night we finally ended it all.
Oh God, the agony. The pain is unbelievable. It’s rushing through my body, my veins, my soul. The memories take me back to that place. The night where it all went wrong. I said we couldn’t do this anymore. You said you didn’t want to break up. We had to end it; we couldn’t keep on going like this. We shouted, we cried, we loved, one last time. It all played out so well. My hands in your hair, your name on my lips and your hands on my hips. The warmth of each other kept the room warm. It was love in the atmosphere. We looked at each other; and just like that, it all went away. The love we sheared, fading. The feelings we had, forgotten. The warmth in the room, gone.
The morning after.
I walked you to the stairs. You stood there confusing. I stood right beside you holding your hand. The stairs were hard to walk. I felt like a rock every time I took a step. We stopped at the front door. You looked in to my eyes as you had your hand on the door handle. Your eyes were blank and full of tears just waiting to run down your face. We kissed one last time. I cried as you took your bag and walked out the door. I watched you walk away; you stopped and looked back. I remember those other times you’ve left, you would run back straight away, but this time you didn’t. You just kept on walking. And just like that you were gone.
As I watched you drive away, I felt a raindrop on my skin. It ran down my face; just like the tears in my eyes. The begging of a journey for some people, but an ending of a journey for us.
Now it’s finally over. I regret nothing.
Tags: Lonely lifelong
This guy was with me for almost a year,but it doesn't matter to me how long or short,i loved him with all my heart and thats what matters,he was my first love and i cant express how much i loved him,what didnt i do for him....but i never asked for more then his love,all i needed was his love,but maybe he never did.
i begged him,pleaded him,but he never replied for anything,sometimes i think that the time we have been togather was a lie,we were never meant to be,i cant believe he did this to me,he has made me feel like the luckiest girl,and on the top of the universe,he made me believe he loved me like anything,but he never did,i wonder how could he do this to me?my only question is why?
Now i only have one of his most beautiful memories we shared,that reminds me of the times we had,our girl baby,she is the most beautiful thing i've seen,when we brokeup i didnt knw i was pregnant,after he left me i came to know and i was really happy,i tried to contect him,but he never listened,he doesn't even know that there is a baby,he even doesn't know where we are,i don't want him to know also,he betrayed me,cheated me.
The feeling of keeping the baby inside me was the most amazing,the way it grew,every second reminded me of him,i still do want him,really badly,lastweek my girly for the first time called dada,and tears filled my eyes,she is very alike to her father,those eyes,those soft lightbrown straight hair,she is only one and half,her small feets put little steps towards me,her every thing reminds me of him,and it makes me happy too.
i wish he would be happy,successfull,and he gets the love he wants,god bless him everyway,i loved him,love him,and will go on loving him forever,now my problem is my bestfriend wants me,but i never thought about loving anyone after him,its not that i didn't try,i did,but cant,i believe its better not to love than loving someone who'll never love you back,i feel as if you love soomeone you will pay for it your lifelong......
So though i am alone,its better to be alone,and live a lonelylife,the reason i am living only is for my babydaughter,she is my life,in my every breath she exists,nothing can harm her as long as i live,i have never let her even fall simply,i've kept her in my arms and looked after her,she is the reason i am,all i am is for her,and i will never let her go through what i went,i've promised this to my self since i knew she was within me.....
i love you my darling,my baby,my girl,my only princess...
Tags: firstlove
My ex and I met in the beginning of my freshmen year. We hated each other at first, but eventually became friends and got very close. One day, she texted me telling me that she loved me a little "too much", so I took that as her saying she liked me. Long story short, we ended up dating. We were so connected it's ridiculous. We spent almost every single minute of every week and weekend together. Of course we had to hide our relationship, but we loved each other more than words can describe. I know we did. The pressure of hiding our relationship really got to me, so we eventually ended up telling our closest friends (we shared all of the same friends). They accepted us, and basically already knew because of the love that they saw radiating from us. We had a lot of problems, though. I was a jealous beyond belief person. I had trouble allowing her to go to any friends houses for fear that she would fall for one of them and leave me. I wanted her to be with me 24/7. I know realize that I needed to lighten up and trust her a little bit more. That was my big mistake. She, on the other hand, did not get jealous enough. She would never show me any kind of affection at school unless I begged for a kiss or hug. I know she might have been scared, but god. It was a year of being together. Get over the fear of PDA. Things clashed, and we just had many problems. This past week, I guess it all just blew up and she was not taking it anymore. We broke up, and she is now gagaing over someone else. She rebounded very VERY quickly. That stings like hell, but there is no talking her into getting back together. She won't budge on this. My only hope is that she dates this new person and sees how much I loved her and that nobody else will love her that way. For right now, I'm just trying to get over it all. Fml.
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