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163 Results For 'help'

Just The Way You Are

October 11, 2011 @ (CA)

It's not really a break up, Im just in desperate need for advice. It all started October last year. I was staying at one of my mums friends houses and her son and I only knew eachother because of our parents work together. He is 17 and a highschool dropout. I'm 15 and still currently doing my studies. That night he went out with a couple of mates. For some peculiar reason I asked him to wake me when he got home. When he did he woke me and we spooned on his bed talking about whatever came to mind. He was so sweet, a side I've never seen from him before. After that experience we never really spoke again. Until about a week ago when I foundmyself in the same position. This time it got sexual. Only he was to big for me, so we didn't end up having sex. He was the first person id engaged with in doing stuff like that. I wasn't his first though. It was kinda strange. I felt so comfortable around him, I could be myself and not be self conscious like I normally am around others, and all my previous boyfriends. After that night we didn't speak again until two nights ago. I layer with him and drew circles on his leg, it was tickling him, and he was so cute. Just before we fell asleep he grabbed my hand and placed it on his crouch. After that he didnt speak to me ever again. I think I've fallen for him, but I can't help to think that he is just in it for the fun and the sexual side of things. I don't think he admires me as a person.he only admires what I can do with my hands. But his the type of person that if he did have feelings for me, he'd never let me know. His quite a big build. But I really want him to know that I love him for who he is, not what he looks like , or what he has achieved. I love him for him. As simple as it gets. His friends are complete drop kicks. And he values what they think. I have a feeling that's why his holding back. I don't know what to do, and advice would be great?! Thanks xo

CaptainMac316

October 01, 2011 @ (USA)

Tags: Sorry, that sucks, That's hilarious

I was dating this girl for almost 5 years. We were high school sweethearts and that continued into college. I get home from work one night and I think it's just a normal night. We are laying in bed watching whatever and she turns to me and says "(Name redacted) we need to talk." My first thought was "Fuck...what did I do now?"
So I ask her "What's up?"
Her response: "I...I found somebody else." I was floored. This was from out of nowhere. Now, as I'm sitting there, I start to think "Where did she find somebody else?" She didn't go to college. She didn't work at the time. She didn't venture out of the house unless she went somewhere with her family. Basically, I was dating a loser. So I asked "Where did you meet this guy?"
She replied, "Online." Ah, that made a lot of damn sense now. So, I ask her "Which site?" I'm thinking like eHarmony or match.com. Her response "I met him in a Harry Potter chat room." My only reaction was to laugh at her. "Are you kidding me?" I asked incredulously. She definitely was not. "What do you talk about on a Harry Potter chatroom? Did he ask you if you wanted to see his wand?" I got no response. Was I said and upset? Yes, but remember, laughter helps out when getting over such things.

Phil

September 30, 2011 @ (Canda)

Tags: Heartache

I recently broke up with my girlfriend. We had been dating for about 11 months. On our first date she told me she had slept with 25 ment which didnt bother me at first but started to bother me when we kept running into them all the time when we went out (prob 12 differnet guys) The reason i initiated the break up was because she goes out drinking once or twice a week (i used to go with her) and come back at 3 unable to talk or walk she is so drunk. she is permanently on anti depressants, her grandmother is a ragins alcholic, as is her aunt and her dad is a recovering alcohilic. i tried to tell her she had issues with alcohol but she wouldnt accept it. she cut back for a while but started up again. She blacks out almost every time she drinks. I emailed her parents with her consent telling them thaat she needed help and she has just started seeing a counsillor eery two weeks. AFter we broke up we were still texting all the time so I imposed a one week communicaiton ban to see how we both felt. Once the ban was finished we ran into each other in a bar and she said that she still really loved me and that she didnt want to be with anyone else but she just couldnt be with anyone and is convinced she is going to spend her life alone just like her aunt. I told her I loved her but she just kept saying she couldnt be with anyone. She says I deserve so musch better than her. I go home and she stays out to party. The next day I go round to hers to tell her i still love her and will never give up on her. I look through the bedroom window as she wont answer the phone and she is in bed with another guy! i am devastated. She comes out and says they didnt sleep together, just kissed at the bar and then she came home by herself and then he called her after as there was a party in her building and then he had a beer on the couch while she went to bed and then he came and slept in the bed after. Says she kept her nightie on with her underwear. I asked her to swear on my life that nothing sexual happened and she did. She crys for 4 hours the next day and says she so sorry she hurt me and she still loves me. I tell her to neer contact me again. A few days later she sends me a text saying "i just want you to know, i hope your doing ok" I didnt reply No contact since then, that was a few days ago.

Megan

September 24, 2011 @ (MO)

Tags: example1

I started seeing this boy back in April. On our first date he told me he was bipolar. I asked him if he was taking medication for it, and he said no. This, of course, worried me, but I was understanding and empathetic. I continued to talk to him, and we realized that we had many things in common. The more we talked, the more I started to like him. On the third date, he told me that he has been dealing with self-injury for the past six years. I was a little shocked that he would share something so personal to someone he just met, but I took it as a sign that he trusted me enough to tell me these things. He also told me that he didn't think he was in a place to be in a relationship at that moment in his life. I understood. After that date, he continued to text me everyday and we continued to see each other about twice a week. Things progressed very quickly and became very intense. A few weeks later, he told me that he had been diagnosed with boderline personality disorder, and that he also had an eating disorder (which I was starting to suspect). I asked him if he was getting help for any of these things, and he said no. I asked him what I could do to help him, and he said nothing. This was all becoming too much for me, but I had started to develop deep feelings for him, and didn't want to abandon him. I was starting to fall in love with him, and I trusted him enough to have sex with him (he was my first). We talked about us and our relationship, and he was still firm that he didn't want or need a relationship. At that point, however, I felt like we were in one, and was very hurt with his decision not to move forward. We broke up soon after that. At the time I thought we were breaking up because we both wanted different things. I wanted to move forward and start a relationship with him, and he did not.

One week (yes, ONE WEEK) after we broke up, he removed me as a friend on facebook and changed his facebook profile picture to him and this girl. A mutual friend told me that he was "in a relationship' with this new girl. After trying to contact him to figure out what the hell was going on, he simply stated that I was not what he needed.

This whole situation has taught me alot about mental illness and what it means to be romantically involved with someone who has one (or many). If someone tells you they have borderline personality disorder and are not in therapy or seeking any sort of help for it, RUN. If you stay, you will only end up getting hurt. Because they will leave you and replace you in a second.

Heidi Cambridge

September 10, 2011 @ (Boston)

Tags: baby daddy

I am a pre-med student at a large eastern university. Last year, the first day of school I met and fell in love with my biology professor. He was so charming, so handsome and so married. I knew it was wrong but I couldn't help myself.

We immediatly stated a sexual liason right there in his class room. I would come to his room during his prep time, and he would have me bend over his desk and we would make love. He was so rough and violent when we had sex, so masculine, it was an addiction to me. I had never been with a real man who would not play around or slowly try to ackwardly seduce me one button at a time. He would just pull me to him, rip my panties down and slam me. It was so hot. I was so in love!

I never used protection and really didn't think about what would would happen if I got pregnant. For some reason, I guess I didn't think I COULD get pregnant. Well, I was wrong and about 8 weeks into the year I realized I must be pregnant. When I told Professor he said it was my responsibility and I had to be a grown up and handle it. So, I decided to keep it and raise it myself. We continued to have sex every day and he showed me so many ways to explore the limits of my sexuality. We tried bondage and some hard discipline. He used to spank me with a paddle and a whip. It was so erotic and I loved it. But, one day when I was bound over the chair and he was swatting me, I began to bleed rather profusely. He told me to leave and take care of myself.

Later in my dorm room, I miscarried the baby. I called Professor and asked for his help, but he told me it was my problem. I wrapped the fetus in a towel. It was a boy.

I have to admit, it hurt me a lot that he didn't want to take care of our baby. So, I came up with a plan.

The next day we were supposed to do dissections in lab. I came to class and worked on my "project". When Professor came around to check our progress, I present him my work, all arranged on a display board. I told him, loud enough for everyone to hear, "Here's my project, its your son!"

He had me thrown out of school and refused to talk to me or have sex with me anymore. I was hurt and I still think of him when I feel the need for a real man in my life. I miss his firm hands on my body and his "tough love". He will always be special to me as he is the person who made me into a real woman.

Claire

September 03, 2011 @ (Maine)

Tags: Jail, drugs, cheating, skanks, player, abuse

My boyfriend of a year and a half and I just broke up. The whole time we've been together has been hell for me. His family wanted him to be with someone else, who moved herself into their house and tried to sleep with him the whole time she was there. She called him all the time and interrupted our dates.
I found her brother's number in his phone after he swore he'd never have contact with her.

All he cares about is doing drugs and had lied to me on several occasions about quitting because I didn't want to be with a drug addict. I had to find out through his best friend who was only trying to butter me up so we could hook up. I rejected him.

Tonight he had another girl call and beg him for help fixing her car. He wanted to go.
He's never once helped me out with anything I've needed in my life. (I'm a victim of abuse emotionally, physically, verbally, and sexually and in a constant state of fear.) But the second some girl calls he turns into some sort of knight in shining armor.

I made him bring me home from our date early tonight and told him that was the last chance he was gonna get.
On the way home he got pulled over for running from the cops. He attacked three police officers and almost went to jail.

Susanna

August 31, 2011 @ (malaysia)

Tags: example 1, example 2

My-then boyfriend of one year said that he needed to go to another island (within our country) to help out family's business (timber business) and he said that he would be back in a month' time. Two months passed, he didn't show any sign that he would come back and when I asked, he made a big deal about it and accused me of forcing him to choose between me and his family.

To make things worse, he also told her family about it and made them hate me.We fought like crazy, and he said he would be there for at least a year. I promised to wait for him. Even though it was so hard to contact him since he's in the jungle most of the time, but I tried my best to make it works.

Three months later, during my study break, I decided to pay him a visit. It was my first time to fly and to go to that island. He promised to pick me up from the airport and spend time with me. I was so excited since Id never flied before and Id never been to that island, because its on other part of my country.

The day before I arrived, I tried to call him but couldn't get through. I was worried but I still went there, hoping that he would keep his promises. When I arrived there, I couldn't get him through the phone.

So I settled down alone, looking for the guest house and all, with a very small budget (since he promised to pay my money back!). I tried to call him everyday but couldn't get through and couldn't stop crying because I was alone there and that place is so unfamiliar to me, couldn't afford to change my flight back.

I called his sister with the hope that she would help me a bit but she just show how much she and her family hate me. I almost faint when I know about it. They didn't even want to see my face.

Only on 5th day finally my-then bf contacted me and agreed to meet me for only two hours. He promised he would come back again. But until now.. after one year and a half I'd never heard from him again.

Susan

August 20, 2011 @ (reading, pa.)

Tags: example 1

I met a wonderful man on match.com. We were instantly attracted to each other. He came on very strong and I told him to take it slow, which did not happen. In the long run it was flattering to have this handsome man say he was falling in love with you. By the third week of dating he did a turn around saying he needed time and was confused. I responded with an email telling him to take the time he needed but in the future no matter who he is with to go slow. We ended up seeing each other again and we were back in the same boat with him telling me he wanted to live with me and he loved me. Again 2 weeks after the first episode he started to pull away saying he was not sure. At this time I was schedule for surgery and he was suppose to take me and be there when I woke up. Well Mr. Wonderful said he was sorry and he just needed time. I told him take the time and I would find another ride to the hospital, terrible timing. Also I told him I could not continue with this roller coaster and to please stop contacting me. We talked a few more times with him saying he was sorry and this whole thing had nothing to do with me!!! I asked it there was somone else and he just said he was going through something. So now the surgery is over, I had lots of friends and family helping out. I am dealing with healing from the operation and the pain of not being with a person I truly cared for. Obviously he had some emotional issues and was not ready or open for a loving relationship. I still have great hope and look forward to my wonderful partner who I know is just around the corner!!

Kay

May 21, 2011 @ (San Diego)

Tags: example1, example2

We were together two and a half years, living together for one and a half of that, and while we had our challenges we loved and enjoyed each other and had planned a life together. We lived as a married couple and a ring had been picked out at his request. We planned trips and planned for a family, but we also enjoyed each other in the moment. I felt very loved, wanted and supported. The challenges were lifestyle issues. He was still a party boy and surrounded himself with party people. When I say party boy I mean that I would classify him and his friends as having drinking problems. I didn't really know the extent of partying until we moved in together. One of my parents is an alcoholic/drug addict so I started to be "triggered" constantly by their behavior and it reached a point of constant anxiety for me and caused major issues in the relationship. I could go on and on about the positives and negatives about this relationship and how the break-up came about and how wronged I felt, but I just don't have the energy. Anyway, at the time of the break-up I was unemployeed (had quit my job at his request two months earlier) so I found myself financially dependant on him, living in his house and with a broken heart. He said I was the love of his life, but that we weren't working and sometimes love isn't enough. If I hadn't been so blindsided by the break-up I probably would have agreed with him. It was horrible how he kept trying to emotionally support me through the break-up. He hugged me, cried, told me he loved me and that we would get through it together. I was losing a part of me and he didn't understand that he couldn't help me get over him. I spent a week in a haze and then went to work on getting my life together so that I could move out. Within a month I found a job and a place to live (which he had to cosign the lease for and pay the first months rent on because I hadn't started my job yet. It was so hard to have to ask him for anything.) So here I am now knowing that it was for the best but still aching with reminders and the "what will never be's". I want to let him go and move on, but it's just so hard.

Annie

March 28, 2011 @ (Illinois)

Tags: Lies, Manipulation

I started dating a guy after we met online. He was great and we immediately hit it off. He was living proof that good guys still existed and I found myself starting to let go of the wall I had built after years of childhood abuse. After a couple weeks of dating he told me that he was falling for me, so I decided that it was time to tell him of my abusive past and the issues that came with it, which was when he told me that he would never do that to me(as he was crying through my stories). Soon, I decided that I was ready to lose my virginity to him, one of the last walls I had held on to. About a week after this happened, he started to pull away but insisted that everything was okay and blamed it on his cold. Shortly after Valentine's Day, he told me that he was a recovering sex addict, something he only told two other people. Having learned to face problems head on instead of running away, I told him that I would help however I could. Plus, I also felt like I would be a b*tch for breaking up with him when he was at a low point already. This went on for a few weeks, while he kept assuring me that our relationship was doing great. Gradually he started to change from the man I had met and into a total stranger, cussing all the time and never happy. Yesterday, he invited me to his house for lunch after going to church. That's when he decided to tell me that he felt incapable of any emotion, especially love. Wouldn't look me in the eye at all and just kept trying to lead me to broach the subject of breaking up. I knew it was all lies, but I played dumb, just trying to make him feel more horrible. He wouldn't even walk me to the door. I just can't understand why he couldn't just grow a pair and break up with me honestly. I feel so used.