Searching for "lost"

163 Results For 'lost'

Linda

June 01, 2012 @ (Canada)

It's been a year since he left and I don't know if I'll ever get over him...
We met during college and didn't start dating till we graduated
We dated for 2 years and although we had our ups and downs, I loved being with him every second of the day
But during one time in our relationship, he cheated on me with my best friend
I found out that he was cheating on me and broke up with him straight away, although I didn't know who the girl was at the time
He kept begging me to take him back but I kept refusing until I realised that I actually missed him a lot
So, I went back with him again
A few weeks later, I found out that the girl he was cheating on with me was my BEST FRIEND
After finding out, I was so hurt and decided to break it off with him once and for all, I wanted nothing to do with him anymore, nor my best friend aswell...
So, I lost two important people at the same time
A year or so later, I bumped into him again and we started talking and eventually just became friends
Although, I kept contemplating on whether or not I should forgive him, because I knew that deep down inside he knew what he had done was wrong, and wanted me back because he still loved me, but he wanted me to be happy so he never asked for reconciliation
But truth is, was that deep down inside my heart, I still loved him, but I was scared of getting hurt again
One night while laying in bed, his parents called me to notify me that he suddenly got into a car crash
I rushed to the hospital and prayed so hard that he was going to be okay, because I wanted to tell him that I already forgave him and was ready start fresh with him, but it was too late...
It's been one year since he's gone and till this day, i still regret not forgiving him earlier, I still regret not taking him back, I feel as though I didn't let him leave this world peacefully...

VM

May 16, 2012 @ (Earth)

Tags: sighs

So me and this girl had dated for about 7 months. The first 5 months was perfect, we were in the honeymoon stage and it was full of love. About 2 months ago, she has this personal problem that she couldnt tell me but I can see a big shift in the relationship. She told me that this personal problem has caused an effect in our relationship and there wasnt anything I she and I can do about it. Things went down hill from here because shes become more snappy. We got into this one petty fight and I walked away because it wasnt necessary. She then later on said something that really got to me, she said that I have no urge to fight and that makes her lose interests and she think she can walk all over me. Maybe its the age difference, im 29 and shes 22 but I dont like fighting over small things especially I already accepted the fact that she is high temper issue. But after this incident, I started having dilemmas with my actions, always questioning whether I'm being too nice or maybe I should be mean. This causes big time withdrawal and I feel like I can't be myself around her most of the time. Since Valentine, we stopped having sex because she has this health issue (i know it wasnt an excuse cuz she has many doctor visits). And then comes the personal problems, she stopped making time for me but rather stay busy with work, school and her friends. A kiss becomes a peck on the lips, holding hands become very vague. The only thing I feel like we truly still had was we still called each other sweet names and quick kisses here and there. I tried to understand and deal with it because I respect her space/time to deal with personal problems. It wasnt easy but I had friends to talk to and helped me through it. About a week ago, we took off on a cruise and the entire time I had to play the "careless attitude" game and to her, I came off as blunt and rude. So be it but I didnt have any more rooms to suppress my feelings about the situation. Then on the way home from the cruise, my ex started venting about her relationship to me (note that she does talked to her ex and whenever my ex contacted me before I always let her know and she said she doesnt care, we have that trust) so I was in a venting mode and vented back. After a few texts, I realized this is wrong because my ex started to tell me if this girl doesnt treat you right then leave her. That doesnt help me, I felt like my ex was trashing on my relationship so I stopped and deleted the thread. My current girlfriend saw that i was texting the ex and later checked my phone but only saw the last part of the message (which said my bf stopped talking to me and walked out of the room, she was venting). To her, this is a dishonest act that I deleted the message, she thinks I have something to hide and she said she lost complete trust in me. I understand where she comes from but I really was deleting the message out of my own guilt and not hiding anything but she doesnt believe me. She said that she has major trust issue and to others this may not be a big deal but to her its a huge deal. I asked her how she felt about us, she said that she doesnt think I can ever cheat on her and that Im the best guy shes ever dated (she dated many guys before but they were all the assholes type so I spent most of my time to show her that good guy does existed and always go out of my way to make her happy) but she cannot trust me after what happened even if she forgives me and broke up the relationship. Ive asked all my friends and they said it was a harsh decision but I need opinions from someone that doesn't know me so please help. I also know that what I did was wrong and I wrote her an apology letter to own all the faults I created but it didnt seem to affect her decision. I just feel very shattered because I spent the past few months to build this relationship and it is now broken over an honest mistake, and accident that I didnt think what i was doing was being dishonest.

Katherine

May 14, 2012 @ (Oooops)

Tags: ex 2

so i have been seeing this guy kyle on and off for about 4 years. we are only on and off cause he left the first time for his best friends girlfriend. so i went for his best friend then we got back together then i left him for someone else and once again we got back together then he was talking to this girl whose a slut and got with her so we broke up and while they were going out he was cheating on her with me.then we were like together and he randomly ignores me and doesnt talk to me and he leaves. he promises he wont ignore me and he wont leave but he still has a record of doing it.this year for spring break i went to myrtle beach and i saw him the day before i left and i wanted to give back his bracelet and talk to him when im back cause we both would get fuked up and feel guilty or regret something. so he begged me to talk to him and keep the bracelet ... i did and during the vacation he ignored me. then randomly he would say eveythings fine. the day i got home he lost hope saying that its not working for him...kyle and me tried again and he got mad at me and wouldnt talk to me. so i went to his house to speak to him and when we spoke he wouldnt look at me. and then a few days he was acting weird. and yestarday he long boarded to my house just to see me... he says it will be different this time and he wont lose hope and he will do anything for us to work out. idk what to do. should i try it or let him go? we love eachother but i dont wanna always get hurt and him ignore me uk? what should i do

Naomi

May 05, 2012 @ (New Jersey)

Tags: i am so sorry, i miss you, you are not the one, you deserve better

I have known Hector for all of my high school years, we were really close and we had a blast together. In our senior year we decided to date. It was fun, he was funny, romantic, sweet but I always felt that is wasn't right. We then dated for almost a year and a half, now we were both in seperate colleges. He said I was his soulmate and he loved me so much, but during our whole relationship I was distant romantically but we still had fun together. Then I put more thought in it and I realized he loved me more than I loved him. I loved him but not in the "right way", I cared of him but really I wanted my best friend back without the romantic stuff. I decided he deserved better in love, someone who could reciprocate his feelings. He did everything right but I just never truly loved him. I wasnt ready to love him, and the day I broke up with him I cried; he cried and begged for me back. I know I am doing this so he can get the best out of life, I realized I could no longer be selfish and reap the benefits of being in a relationship when I didnt love him. So now as I write this, I am getting ready to visit him; it is a couple weeks after our break up, and I need to return some of his stuff and I dont know what is going to happen. No matter how much fun we had I could no longer go back to him. I am actually really childish but this is the maturest decision I think I have ever made but it just feels so hard. I lost my best friend, I will no longer hear about his life and it is really hard. But I know someone will love him completely and eternally. But in the back of my head I dont think I would find someone who loves me as much....

Bella

April 27, 2012 @ (new york)

Tags: breakup

We met back in high school, good friends I can say. Yes I was attracted to him but never paid attention to that. he's older so he graduated before I did and we lost contact. 3 years later I randomly thought of him and look him up on Facebook. We exchange numbers and make plans to hang out. We hung out a few times just as friends,it was great I had a blast with him. We spent every night together just hanging out for about a month then he invites me to his place and, we hook up. He admits to me he had a thing for me back in high school too. We start seeing each other and after awhile we discuss ”us” and we agree to take things to the next level later on cause we're not ready. I loved everything about being with him, everything. We often had fights but that never really effected us. The situation at home took a turn for the worse when I had to make the decision of moving out of state, rather far. I try to find an alternate solution before breaking it to him but no luck. I break the news to him - I'd never seen him so angry. Not the reaction I was expecting. Everything went downhill from there. I wasn't suppose to leave for another 2 months though but we started to drift before that. I start seeing someone else - rebound I guess, I was both hurt and angry at him. He cuts me off when he finds out about it. It turns out Im staying and not moving out of state, still moving from that town though. I was over him, I thought. All my things are packed, half of my furniture is out. He lives maybe 10 blocks from me, 3 minute drive. I feel so guilty about the way things ended so I get in contact with him and ask him to see me. It took some convincing but he agreed to see me that night. He picks me up, the car ride is silent until I b lurt out how sorry I am. We never officially ended what we had, so when I got with this new guy, he was under the impression that we were still together and that's why he cut off - a total misunderstanding. That evening/morning was amazing. I thought everything would go back to normal, maybe even better than before. He drops me off in the morning, says he can see himself falling in love with me and that even when I was with that other guy I was still his girl and all this other bullshit. I go to bed, and wake up to his texts. We talk all day and all night. But that's the last day I saw him. The Next day he doesn't reply to anything I send him. Days go by, and still nothing. I was so utterly confused and hurt. I resort to Facebook I finally get a reply and all he says is ” what do you want?” I get the hint, just don't understand why. But okay, whatever.
It never occurred to me that I didn't mention to him that I wasn't moving out of state.
Months go by. I'm with other men but none of them phase me - the way he did. I get in contact with him and we end up having a very casual conversation. At the very least I thought we could keep our friendship but again, cuts me off. Wtf!
Here I am a year later, still thinking about him. I can't have a successful relationship because I still have some very strong feelings for him.
All my friends tell me to let it go... How many times have I tried that already? It seems impossible. It's not that I want to be with him, I just want an explanation so I can sleep at night.
If I had the opportunity to talk to him, do you think I should? I wouldn't know what to say or how to say it. I don't know how he'd react to me..

Kyla

April 18, 2012 @ (ireland)

Tags: awkward

ok so about a year and a half ago me and my fiance were in a hostel trying to get our own place and it was in there we met a guy called brian hes a really good friend of ours but when we were in the hostel i thought i had feelings for him but i couldnt act on them because i was engaged (still am) but anyway one day my fiance was acting like he didnt want to be near me like he didnt want me anymore so i said fuck this and i decided to act on what i was feeling i knew he felt the same way because he was always trying to touch me and kiss me so when my fiance was in the kitchen making himself something to eat brian had said he wasnt gonna do anything until i ask him to so i told him how i felt and he kissed me before i knew it we were in bed together having sex anyway after he moved out we lost touch but today he calls me and we started talking again and everything was fine no one knew what happened between the two of us but he told me he has settled down with a girl who is 5 months pregnant and that she lives up where i used to live so i asked her name and straight away i recognised it i asked if she had a sister called valerie and she said yes thats when i was 100% sure who she was when i told him ask if she knows valeries husband daughter kyla and when she said yes i told her thats me he kept asking how i knew and i told him shes my auntie things got so awkward my best friend and accidental affair is getting married and having a baby to my auntie when she found out she laughed and she didnt know what to say but it was long before they ever met so i do feel really bad but i dont know whether i should be feeling bad or not p.s my fiance still doesnt know about it

DEMI

March 23, 2012 @ (missouri)

Tags: betrayal..sex..other man

hi im new to this website...an i jus needed a place to tell my story...imma start off by saying...i jus turned 25 an i was in a 4 year relationship wit a man named jamall...the first 2 years with him was great .he proposed an life was cool until 2 months later after the engagement i caught him in a online affair wit a girl a state away ..so i broke offf the engagment ...so the next 2 years i had caught him up in many lies...until 2010 he started dj at a local club...i felt like i had to live up to his image..he was getting noticable an hott...so i felt as a dj girlfriend i should look da part an i did i bought fake ass pads...an the nicest clothes to meet his standards..well after a year doin that i became someone else i lost my idenity an started becoming someone i didnt recongize...an his actions were getting worst ..until on day in may of 2011 changed my life forever..i meet a guy who was in da army ...he was everything my boyfriend wasnt ...so by that point my boyfriend was doin his thing an he stopped showing me love an care..an attention ..so when this new guy came in my life to provide me all that i loved it...so on our first date we had sex...it was the best sex i ever had...an it jus happened ..we enjoyed it an the feeling we were feeling so we decided to see each other again an again sex sex an more sex...feelings were getting involved an we didnt care he was single i wasnt but it felt soo right ...so he had to leave for germany 3 weeks into me cheating i had fell inlove with him ..an had a man at hme..but i didnt care i was happy an myself with the army guy...so he left an i was faced with my bf back hme..it was the most miserable time ever...i continued to talk to the army guy for 6 months until he came hme again on leave in december 2011 ..we were inlove at that point an i was ready to leave my bf..an all i wanted was the army guy well...i had came across my bf had been sleeping wit a 19 yer old since november 2011 an i found out all this in february on my bday..i was floored ...he say he still loves me but he cant treat me right ...his actions are wht ran me off in the first place ...i really love the army guy an he loves me 2 we r sooo happy together ...i dnt kno if i should leave my 4 year relationship or leve my 10 month affair...please u guys help me but i love the army guy he is da one but my bf we only have time no kids no future plans no promises so ill take all the advice u can give

Megan

March 18, 2012 @ (Michigan)

Tags: Awful, Terrible, mean, unexpected

I had been dating this guy for 9 almost 10 months. Things were going good, we almost never had fights, and we would do anything for each other. He even used my birthstone for his class ring. He had never once been vicious or rude, and always respected me.
One day he decided to break up with me because he thought I wouldn't be able to commit to him. After a long argument, we decided to just take a break. Only 3 days later, he already made out and had a thing with a new girl. When he told me, I admit I was extremely hurt. Then a side i had never seen before started to show. He blamed everything on me, told me he didn't think I was that good looking and that he just "warmed up" to me, told me he hated me, and made fun of everything I said. I lost my virginity to him, now I really wish I didn't.

Morgan

March 11, 2012 @ (California)

Tags: Morgan

Me and my ex were together for 4 years. Last year he got into drugs. It ruined our relationship. He lied, stole and cheated.
When we first got together I had just gotten out of a relationship and he was in a bad one. We leaned on each other for comfort and ended up falling in love. I felt we had the perfect relationship. It was us against the world. We brought a beautiful child into the world and had the perfect happy family.
The stuff he has done to me while on drugs is unthinkable. The person I fell in love with was sweet, understanding, funny, considerate, everything I wanted out of a partner.
For 3 weeks prior to our breakup he got clean. It was great. I felt like we were falling in love all over again. Things were happy and he was being a wonderful father again. Then he left for the store that one faitful day and did not come back. He gave me some excuse about being kidnapped by old druggie friends. Came back the next day with my car wrecked and a girl. He stopped coming home after that and finally 4 days later I had enough and I packed up me and my son's stuff and moved out. Apparently that girl moved in the same day I left and they were together since then.
In the following 2 months he turned our family home into a drug house, went on leave from his job, totalled his car, and ended up in jail, oh and lost our home because he was jailed.
A couple of days into his jail stint we talked on the phone and he cried and appologized for everything he had done. We kinda reconciled but a week after he got released he started lying to me about texting someone. He got really defensive about who he was talking to just like he would do to me when he was doing drugs. He wont stop lying and I do not think I can get over the pain he has caused me and my son. He used to be wonderful and now he is the complete opposite. I am at a crossroads with our relationship and not sure what to do. My gut instinct tells me to run screaming into the hills and my heart is saying work it out with him.

Perc3pti0n

February 28, 2012 @ (Australia)

Tags: (trust, love, friends, life)

Second year of high school we became friends. But he wasn't one of my usual friends, we would poke and push each other around playfully. We would compete over little things. Our friendship slowly grew, he didn't let anyone in easily. But even at that young age people always teased us about being together. Four years later he was my best friend and much more, we went out and it started off great. I was suffering from depression at the time and he got me help, he helped me through all of it. I felt safe with him. He didn't really have many close friends except me, i felt like his only one and i loved it. We would fight a lot but we always made it through. Then when high school finished we broke up, we had enough. I still wanted him but maybe only because i felt lonely. We were determined to stay friends. But as soon as he moved out of home and into the city he made his own friends and one night we found ourselves throwing abuse at each other, i missed him and i was angry that he was absent in my life. Anyway as i began to cry on the phone telling him how much i actually missed him, he began to laugh, saying he didn't need me, he didn't care. I can't even recognize him anymore.

Early in our relationship he said he would never break up with me. He said we would always be best friends. He seemed so great but in the end he turned out like every other selfish bastard. I've lost my trust in people, i hope one day i can regain it. More than anything though, i see how much he's enjoying life right now and how i'm not and its difficult to get through.