My boyfriend of 2 1/2 years broke up. What hurts me most are all the fond memories I have about him and the relationship. Every little thing I see and I hear reminds me of him and the moments I thought were as enjoyable for him as they were for me. I know that I did everything to make this work, but at the same time I always had the feeling I was forcing the relationship and that his feelings for me were not as strong as my feelings for him. What I do not understand, is why he pretended for so long. When I used to ask him about his feelings for me he would say I am making drama and I was an insecured person, the truth is, I was always asking becuase his actions and attitudes yelled You are not the one. On top of that, when we broke, he was crying and telling me that he loved me but he could not stand the drama anymore. So he wanted me to feel guilty about this. Would it be possible that he deliberately was acting mean, to see how far I could endure the situation, and finally say it is over because of you? Would not it be easier to say I am sorry my feelings for you are not strong enough?
Tags: love1
We had been together for three years. Three happy years. We laughed all the time, went places together, shared dreams and thoughts. Had awesome debates. We didn't always see eye to eye, obviously, but when we argued it was productive. There was compromise on both parts and I FELT so loved and so lucky. I looked at other people's relationships and couldn't understand all the drama and strife. We worked through our problems and were steadily making progress and both happily moving forward in our relationship. So much laughter and joy, any issue was rare because we got along so well. And then about a week before it happened, maybe two, I noticed he was very distant. I chalked it up to work stress and so many other things. I didn't push, thinking he would talk about it when he was ready. I know how I feel when I get the blues, I don't want everyone pushing me and asking me what's wrong, ad nauseum. He called me one day while he knew I was at work and gave me the dreaded line, "We need to talk." He said he didn't love me. He wasn't looking for "the one." We weren't compatible, etc etc etc. This from the man who only a week before had purchased a trip over seas with me and was talking about our future and telling me how special I was, I mean I literally had the wind knocked out of me. Now he says he wants to be friends. I love him but I'm not stupid. I don't want to be with someone who could flip on me so quickly, who would lead me on for three years, someone who apparently doesn't love me. But, my heart just can't seem to catch up with my brain. I see that he had an attack of commitment-phobia. But, how can it be true that he would stay with me for so long, that we could both be SO happy and he doesn't love me? I am having trouble moving on because I just can't wrap my head around it. And this whole, "We can still be friends," mess. Yeah, right. That has to some selfish ploy to alleviate his guilt feelings. And he tells me things like, "People break up all the time." "People change." It seems like the only thing that changed was how he acted toward me. And people do break up all the time, but so suddenly? So arbitrarily? He said he has never been with anyone as long as he has been with me and that no one was so immersed in his life, that he had never been so close with anyone else. Ever. He still wants me to be a part of his life. But he doesn't love me? He has loved other girlfriends, but not me? I'm lost. I just don't get it.
Tags: Hm
I got together with my best friend. We had a good time, moved to a city of a different country together to live there for a year during my student exchange. We had a good time and we cared for each other a lot. Soon doubts crept in, I wondered whether I loved him enough, whether this was what I wanted from love in life. Only in the crisis that lead to our break up I learned that he's had similar doubts. The drama is that there was no drama. We broke up in perfect mutual understanding, in agreement over the issues that we didn't like and also sharing the opinion that starting new with somebody else would be the best option. I still believe this is right and I don't want to let things get messy by contacting him, I don't want him to come back out of sympathy and I don't want me to try and get him back just out of the fear of losing an extraordinary friend and perhaps the most supportive, accepting and understanding person I met in my life.
Now, it's only been two weeks and after an amazing conversation with one of my professors who tried to help me (and succeeded doing so in a way), I still doubt my choice and I still miss him and the loss of him is certainly the hardest thing I ever had to take.
Perhaps you guys think this is easier as it didn't get nasty, and perhaps you are right, but is there anything that is more bitter than two people who desperately want to be together and tried to make each other happy but whose love simply wasn't enough?
However, this story just seemed different from most I read here so I'll share it with you.
Tags: funny and dramatic
my boyfriend and i started out really happy. then we started drifting apart. he started acting like a jerk and i felt really self concious around him. we tried to talk about it but we never had time alone. eventually we broke up:( we stayed friends for like a day and then we had a huge fight. im not going to go into too much detail but lets just say i called him a jerk and he cussed at me. anywho, we ended up apologizing and we bacame friends again. eventually we both realized that we both still feelings for one another so we tried to start dating. on our firat date of the second try we only talked about why we broke. we ended up having another huge fight and we broke up again. i thought that wuz the end of ojr entire relationship. we finally made up and now were super great friends again. Just so that you know, this all happened within a week. every now and then ill have a sudden urge to like him and ask for him back but i just brush it off and move on
Okay so I like this guy name Brandon. He's perfectt and well the thing that sucks is he doesn't like me but maybe I'm annoying? Haha I've asked him out 50 bigilioon times or soo(: anyways I'm so anxipus to find out who's hes gonna ask out... maybe itss one of my friends (I'd be happier if it was me though) actuallyy I might pass out. Anywayss I HOPE THIS WEEKEND FLIES BYE...SUPRISINGLY
Tags: example 1
So i was hooking up with this guy who went by the nickname drama yah fucking dumb right ha well anyway we are hooking up like almost everynight and we both agree that its nothing more than sex well then i kinda fall for him but he says it wont happen so i break things off well then he comes back and says he does like me so we start back up again only for two days later he is fucking another girla dn telln me all about it. So should i walk away for good or try to see if things will get better.
Tags: Tags
My girlfriend of 9 years broke up with me to be with an old high school friend. The sad part is that I have a feeling that they will eventually get married within the next year or so. I’m absolutely crushed like never before. We’ve had our share of problems throughout our relationship and unfortunately it’s mostly my fault. I feel so stupid for taking her for granted.
We met in college back in 2001 and it started out as the most beautiful thing in this world that either of experienced. We were soul mates and were certain that we’d be together forever. It was like we were two peas in a pod, amongst a campus full of strangers and were very happy we found one another. It didn’t take us but 6 months to move in together we were so in love. However, after graduating college, I struggled for years, and was depressed even, to find a job. She supported us for most of our relationship as she was blessed with a wonderful career as an exceptional community organizer, which she now serves as the executive director of her organization. Me on the other hand, struggled immensely to find my passion, and had several dead end low paying jobs.. This was emotionally hard on me, and most certainly on her. However, we would make the best of our situation by taking various trips around the country and enjoying the natural bond we had for one another. We didn’t have to take trips really we enjoyed staying home together, whether we were intimately conversing about any topic or making passionate love. However, my career struggles took a severe toll on our relationship. I even went through a period of alcohol abuse, which lasted a couple of years. Eventually, after 4 great years she began to loose interest in me, and cheated on me a few times. Although I was obviously crushed, I took her back because I loved her so so much and believed we could work through anything, plus I always envisioned her as the mother of my kids. Fast forward to January 2008, I eventually found a job which pays great and I absolutely love-- finally I’m able to support us and feel good about myself in that regard. We celebrated the entire 2008 in the name of my success and life seemed golden--finally my career struggle was over! Unfortunately I started to drink again and lied several times about it and thus undermining any trust left. At that time, she started to give me warnings that I had to stop or else she’d leave. Fortunately I finally stopped, but we would still argue. She also began to voice, starting in mid-June of this year, that she was growing unsatisfied in our relationship and that we needed to talk. I unfortunately kept prolonging “the talk” and became slightly tuned out every time she said it. Beginning of August I noticed she started to act suspect: she seemed to pay more attention to sending text messages on her smart phone than being in my company. So, I naturally had a hunch something was wrong, so I checked her work email and noticed she made reservations at hotel to be with some random guy, the weekend I was going out of town visit college friends in LasVegas. To make a long painful story short, I confronted her about it over the phone while she was at work, she became shell-shocked that I found out and started crying. We hang up and she eventually came home from work. The first thing she said was we should break up… and that I should‘ve talked to her but now it‘s too late we have to break up. I’m begging and pleading for her to get her to change her mind, and that we should talk now, but she insisted we should break up. The next day I go to work, come back home and she’s gone. I call her and she said we shouldn’t be around each other anymore and one of us needs to move out. Now I’m in further disbelief and shock. What follows after that is even more painful drama, trauma rather, and would take another 500 words or so to explain but I‘ll save the detail--it’s bad.. In short, she’s been at a friends house for the past 3 weeks looking for a place and blocked my number from her cell phone, it turns out this random guy is an old high school friend and they are in a intimate partnership. She even hinted that they are talking about marriage. Meanwhile I’ve been alone in our old apartment reminiscing, broken-hearted but refusing to let go, looking at old pictures and her belongings, under an unbearable amount of sorrow, loss of appetite and motivation, deteriorating self-esteem and ego. I’ve been reading passages from Psalms to make it through the day. My life feels like it’s over.
Tags: niles
I was going over to meet my girlfriend and her family for christmas dinner, that's when my phone rang. She tells me not to come over there was some family drama. I turned around after 15 mins of driving. another day goes by without me hearing from her. I didn't think that anything was wrong with us, i just wanted to make sure she was ok. she just wouldn't answer or respond. well, she txted me last night. i hate text messages, and i hate her.
Tags: la
Few weeks ago I starting dating a new guy. Previously i was in a long term type deal and needed some time before getting the market again. We had a few dates, it was that time that we could mess around some. well, when I went to pull down his pants his 'guy' wasn't much of a guy at all. I didn't mean to, but i giggled. he pulled up his pants can ran out. I felt terrible, but he didn't have to make it so dramatic. wow, they say that women are drama queens.
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