Searching for "mat"

226 Results For 'mat'

Nameomitted

March 19, 2013 @ (United States)

We were never really official but this feels like a break up to me. We met in November. He was a military guy, no car, was leaving in a couple months. So at first we kept it casual. When he left on holiday leave we were both expecting him to return--he never did. Even though it was just a fling, it felt so unfinished. We'd text almost every day. At one point he said he missed me, and so I brought up the possibility of an LDR. We talked about the cost and how often we'd get to see one another, but in the end he said he hated LDRs, which I interpreted as a no. Yet we kept in touch, and I wanted to see him so badly. I wanted it more than I have wanted anything, I was so sprung on this guy. So I flew out to visit him last week. But I felt like he kept holding back, which in turn made me nervous. I froze up, and the entire week was a mix of silence and awkwardness. There were moments where we'd liven up, and we were only able to soften up physically--not just sex, but touches, caresses, neck rubs. The physical connection wasn't as crazy raw as I remembered it being, but we were still good together. It was still hot. However, I think my quietness got to him, and by the end of the week we were both exhausted. I could tell that he had run out of patience, and I had tired myself out by silently worrying and wondering and panicking. By the time I left we just waved goodbye. No hug, no kiss, not even a handshake.

On one hand, while I was out there I was noticing things about him that I didn't see before, and I would think to myself, "Hmm... no, I don't think we'd work as a couple." I know that we wouldn't. We have the same interests, and we're physically compatible. We're both thoughtful and affectionate. But intellectually, we don't really connect. Maybe I'm a little too independent for him? I don't know. We have different values. I actually found him to be kind of boring most of the time. He probably thought the same of me. I don't think we're actually boring people, but we tend mute each other out for some reason. But even with all that, it was one of the hardest break-ups I've had. Maybe because I was so invested in the dream of him, in the possibility, in the romantic star-crossed-lovers feel of the whole situation. That and my ego is kind of bruised. I was in love with his body, that's for sure.

I wanted it to be him, you know? I wanted him to tell me he wanted to work something out. I wanted to move clear across the country for him. I loved it out there and would love the adventure of it all, but I'm not going to lie that having him out there with me was the top reason I wanted to move. I wouldn't be alone. I have family and friends out there, so it wouldn't have been JUST for him. I guess I could still move if I wanted to, even if we never spoke again...

I hate that I get moody and distant when emotion overwhelms me. I shut off, and in those times it's nearly impossible for me to communicate how I'm feeling. When I panicked, I would push him away. That's one of the things I regret the most. I wasn't at my best, as hard as I tried. I feel... not good enough. Disheartened. The day he dropped me at the airport I still had a 2 hour wait, on top of a 6 hour flight. And I was fighting back tears the whole time. And I still have my spells of utter sadness.

In my heart, I know it's for the best. I know that I'll get over it, like I always do. I know that in time I'll look back and be able to see that it was a fun experience, and I'll be able to see how much I learned from it all. But right now, in the thick of it, it's a struggle to get through the day. I just want to go home and curl up and cry. But I have to work, and go to class, and be mature. And I don't want to annoy my friends and family by ranting and venting all the time, so I came here... It kind of helps, sharing this with strangers. So thanks.

N/A

February 28, 2013 @ (Ontario)

Tags: Timing, Love

I haven’t had much experience with serious relationships but this is one of the hardest things I've done. I would really appreciate some feedback from outside sources since I'm a popular guy but few people to go to in this city and certainly no shoulder to cry on.
Last night I broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years; a girl I admire and daresay love (in many ways), who upon graduating, fought her hateful parents and moved to the city where I studied to complete my late ass degree. Free rent to help pay her loans and good job opportunities out of the question, she moved here to work to survive just to live with me.
We’re both 22 now, and we have known each other for a little over 2 years. Because of her anxiousness to date and my cautiousness it took us about 6 months to go from friends to official.
Moving in after a year was scary enough but done so that we could stay together. This loving girl knew she wanted me forever from the first few months. I was new to the whole relationship scene, and rather unsure. Naturally the thought that she was scared the crap out of me.
But we moved in, and as expected there were some rough nights. We were far from perfect, and her dependence on me paired with her inherent need to ‘have the final say’ on everyday issues tested my rationality regularly. In spite of a few terrible nights where we swore we were done, the year as roommates ended far better than expected. We had learned a lot about living with one another and grown our love. This was mostly because she did everything possible to be the perfect girl, she: is caring, generous, and sweet beyond belief, cooks fantastic meals, adopts new styles, and always promoted a good sex life. Still I felt unhappy – for a reason that was not immediately clear. I loved her, but I also restrained my interests for her sake at times. I feel that this is normal, but I also feel young and that there is much I want to do before I make the necessary sacrifices that come with commitment. In short - I felt that everything was moving too fast.
She never stopped pressuring me into the thing she wanted most from me - a promise. This was something that I couldn't give until I felt ready. She plans to have the security of an engagement ring within the next couple of years, and reminds me of that regularly. I love her, but this is my life too!
With what looks like 2 or 3 years before a real career begins for me, being ready to propose seems half a decade away. I tell her I want to enjoy the relationship we have and continue to work on it and grow together. When I talk to her about the pressure her sacrifices put on me she says she wants someone to match the love –and commitments- that she shows. Unfortunately I can't do that, and although I love her, I have to let her go.
Our timing was cruelly wrong, and I think it is finally time to stop ignoring that fact and use the time to explore myself and my desires. She could be the one, but that’s just not something I can decide yet.

GZB

February 26, 2013 @ (Maryland)

Tags: Love Betrayal

This is almost a two year long story. I have a short 25 minute video that will be attached to this video. I met a girl that I was there for right off the bat when her mom was having more time f***ing this guy than taking care of her daughter. She moved in with in with me, but soon I would learn the truth to her. She was abusive, and didn't do anything. She had very bad hygiene problems that would lead to her yeast infection and multiple UTI's. She watched pedophile porn which made me absolutely sick. The girl walked out on me when I needed her, and we would eventually break up. She would play mind games with me back and forth for a while. Then in the end she finally told me that I was just a comforter, that I never mattered, and to go kill myself. Sadly I'm cursed with this feeling because she was my first everything. The video below will give a better insight.

Jenny

February 20, 2013 @ (Canada)

Tags: boyfriend, liar

This all began after I had broken up with my ex ( connor.) I wanted something new and exciting. 2 weeks after, my bestfriend introduced me to a guy by giving me his number. His name was Mathew. Good looking, had his own car, fun

From the moment I met him there was something about him. He would always pick me up, bought me expensive gifts, which was unnecessary but I loved it. The thing with mathew was that, his stories never seemed to add up, and about the silly things. For example, he would tell me that he didnt like this movie, and a month later he would say he really liked it. We would always get in these confrontations because I never knew what was going on in his head. He was an amazing liar. He had many issues, his dad was an alcoholic, he had issues within himself. I wanted to be there with him every step of the way, I gave up so much for this guy. He had never told anyone he loved them before, it was a HUGE thing for him, and finally after seeing a psychologist for that and other problems, after a year we had been dating, he finally told me he loved me. I left for hawaii with my family shortly after, and we would talk on facebook even though I found he was being really distant.

When I came back, I had a feeling something was off. I asked him if he had been going out behind my back, and he took my hand, looked at my straight in my eyes and said " I promised I havent been lying to you about ANYTHING. " But that was lie within itself.

I found out that he had been lying to me, well everyone about his personality, who is he. As i mentionned above how he would lie about liking a movie, even a certain food- only to get me to like him. And it worked! He never ever told me things that he didnt like about me. If i did something to piss him off, he wouldnt tell me and he would go talk shit about me to other people to get his anger out.. I didnt know this. I had broken up with him, and he seemed really sad and guilty, so i offered a break, just for few days to think things over. 4 days later I contact him, and he tells me to get out of his life, he hates me, he was only with me cause he felt bad for me..? im so confused. Apparently he was just tired of pretending to be someone else around me, and having bottled up all his emotions he blew up on me.

What I fell inlove with was just a bunch of lies put together. Right before we went on break, he admitted to me that the psychologist wanted to send him to see a psychiatrist, im guessing to get diagnosed with most likely a personality disorder. Its hard for me to move on from here because I just keep thinking back on what was true and what was a lie.. Ill never know. I seen pictures of him clubbing 2 days ago and it hurt me so much. Im doing my best to move on, I really thought this guy loved me, I shouldve listening to the warning signs from the begining.

Keller Connley

February 17, 2013 @ (Milford, Ohio)

Tags: First Girlfriend, Betrayel

Hello everyone. My name is Keller Connley, and this is the story of how my first girlfriend broke my heart. It was freshman year, and the homecoming was coming up. I was very desperate and asked a lot of girls to come with me, but they all said no. Finally, I asked this girl who I had only seen a few times during school, and she was in my math class. So, a week before homecoming, I asked her, and she said, "I'll, think about it." The next day, she told me yes I will go with you and gave me her number. Later that night, when we were texting, she told me that she had a boyfriend. I was shocked, since I would have never asked her if I had known. She said to not worry, because she wanted to break up with her anyway. So she did that, and a few days later we were going out. Homecoming was extremely fun and I had a great time with her.

So, during our time together, we did things, like go to the movies and hung out at my dads place. We didn't go all the way, since we were in ninth grade and both Christians. The furthest I went was halfway between 2nd and 3rd base.

We did this for eight months, but I started to realize that there were cracks in the relationship. We stopped spending every second of school outside of class together, and we also didn't text as much as before, since I had broken my phone.

The straw that broke the camels back, however, was in fact my best friend for 3 years. He got jealous, and somehow convinced me she was cheating on me, and convinced me to give him her number. That was on Sunday May 6th 2012. She confronted me the next day, and started asking me weird questions. Apparantly, my friend had told her lies, such as that I watched gay porn, and that I had my eyes on this black girl in school. I dismissed these lies, and life was normal again. However, on May 12th and 13th, when we talked over the phone, she told me that she had feelings for my friend. On May 14th, when school started, she broke up with me, and shattered my heart. I later found out that she had asked out my friend no more than 19 minutes later. My birthday was that Saturday.

For the following 2 weeks, I broke down in tears many times, both in and out of class. She in my opinion is being controlled by him because he has threatened me with violence, and the few times I have been able to speak to my ex, she tells me, " I shouldn't be talking to you. Randy is very jealous, and I don't want him to hurt you."

Now, since it's been almost a year, I am going to try and talk to her again. What do you guys and gals think I should do?

Molly

January 25, 2013 @ (New Jersey)

Tags: Mat

I always knew my relationship with my jackass ex boyfriend Matthew would not work out... He was always an asshole yet I stupidly fell for him anyway.

So we went out one day and he told me that he wanted to break up with me because 'he couldn't love me as much as I loved him'. Fair enough I said ok and we parted ways.

Next day I meet up with my male best friend and tell him what happened and things got a bit intimate (always had a soft spot for him). One week later I'm out with my best friend and we're holding hands when I see the ex! And guess what, he had a new girlfriend! So he was cheating on me throughout the 1 year relationship.

I grabbed my best friend and made out with him in front of Matthew. It was so worth it. When I went home Matt deleted me off facebook and I couldn't give a flying fuck about him. Matthew walks past me at Uni and acts as if I don't exist. Last week I was on the bus and Mat's girlfriend was sitting in front of me. I made it a point that she knows who I am and wished her the best of luck with her boyfriend.

Its not her fault she's with a jackass. I wish I could warn her what sort of a person he is. Once a cheater always a cheater.

I'm not in a relationship with my best friend, but I still make out with him when I see Mat :)

Nan El

January 01, 2013 @ (New York)

Tags: Cheating with co-worker, 3 years of lies

Over three years ago I started dating a man that was selfish, a cheater, a liar and just plain self centered. He admitted this to me. I was hesitant at first but it didn't take long for him to have me believing that he wanted to be a better man for me. We worked together for years and once he transferred to another department, that's when we started dating. He asked me to marry him after just a few months and treated me as if I was the only woman on earth. We spent constant time together and he would look me in the eyes everyday and tell me how much he loves and adores me and wants to be with only me the rest of his life. I introduced him to my kids and he moved in with us shortly thereafter. He lived with us for one year and during that time he started drifting, working more...going out longer with his friends. He started telling me he was having a hard time living with kids (who I only have half the week) and he only saw them maybe twice a week. He told me he couldn't live with us anymore and it just wasn't "him". The day after he moved out he was begging for me back and this went on and off for a year and a half. We broke up last December of 2011 because he couldn't handle things...all while still claiming to love me and not want anyone else. For about 6 weeks we went back and forth about our love for each other then he said he needs me and promises to be the man II need. I took him back and we were together up until October of this past year 2012....still back and forth with his feelings...but kept promising to marry me and move back in. I broke up with him in October when he told me he couldn't take vacation to Disney World with me and the kids which was planned and paid for and was happening in 3 weeks!! He continued to text and call me crying that he needs me, etc... But his gram was sick and he didn't want to go anywhere. He made me feel guilty for taking vacation without him! When I returned right after Thanksgiving, I started finding out some things from people and emails, etc.. He started sleeping with one of my employees last year when we broke up...she works very closely with me. They broke up when he got back together with me...but then he contacted her to "get together" in April, May and November. We went to a concert together in June and they acted like they didn't even know each other then went to get beer for 20 minutes together! At that point I had no reason to think anything of it. Once I confronted both of them, they denied even knowing each other and called me crazy. She ultimately confessed but they are both still claiming it wasn't all year long. She has had boyfriends this whole time as well. I am now in a situation where they both still work for the company and she still reports to me. They act as if nothing is wrong and life is good....they show no remorse. By the way, she is 12 years younger than him! I have so much pain and it is in my face everyday. How do I get over it?

Alexis

November 14, 2012 @ (Florida)

Tags: regret

Well it all started with this guy. He is a little bit younger than me. He is really sweet and a really great guy, but there is just one thing. He acts really annoying and immature sometimes. I fell in love with him though, he was my first real relationship. However, throughout the relationship I found myself loving him one day and then just hating him the next. He got on my last nerves sometimes. I had considered breaking up with him many times but I knew that he was really in love with me and I couldn't bring myself to do it. So one day me and my friends were all talking and his name came up in the conversation, I was telling them how he was really starting to act immature and annoying and thats when I decided I just couldnt handle it anymore. I could let him keep loving me and me holding back. I didn't know how to break it to him without hurting him though. So I decided that the best way was just to start a rumor that he was talking to other girls, BIG mistake. I knew it was wrong but I just couldn't tell him the truth. I thought that he would believe it since someone had already told me rumors about him before. The next day at school my he found out that the rumor was false and he got really mad. And on top of all that my friend told him I cheated on him while we were dating, she completely stabbed me in the back. She told him I made out with a guy at a party. It wasn't true, I was at my cousins birthday party and we were playing truth or dare, I got a dare to kissed this kid on the cheek. So I did, it wasn't a big deal, he was like 12 and it was just on the cheek. It meant nothing but she changed it all around. I felt terrible, I missed him like crazy and the sad thing is was I broke up with him two days before our 4 month anniversary. I began to realize that he really loved me and he was an amazing guy.My whole world just fell apart,no one understood my decision, not even my parents. I felt like everyone hated me for what I did. I even hated myself. I just wanted to undo it all. I made a stupid decision. I hope one day he will forgive me and maybe we can try to date again but until then I have to deal with the regret and guilt.

Bon

November 05, 2012 @ (United States)

Tags: Heartbroken

I was in a 2 year...almost 3 year relationship with a guy i met and fell in love with. I was 17 at the time so i was young and astonished by how this guy filled up every stupid immature void in my heart. Im 20 now...almost 21 and his friends took him in again and im left to rot. I was always alone while he went to the bar or smoked with his friends. I had friends but didnt know how to go and hang out since i was so used to my boyfriend and putting him first was a must. Today, i had enough. i was with my friends having a great time while he was with his friends. I realized today that my happiness is precious and nothing in this world should interfere with that...so i broke up with him...i mean theres more to it than just an urge to breath and be alone. I know im gonna miss him and i know itll hit me eventually but ill be okay...I have my friends and family. His past got in the way anyways. Im in college, almost done, im ready to take the next step with my life. Its okay right? ill be okay.

I Miss Him

November 02, 2012 @ (OK)

Tags: break up sad death

His name was Joseph. We met & fell in love. He was really sweet and caring. We were only together for a month. He found out his ex was three months pregnant and with twins. So we broke up because of those responsibilities. We tried to get along. But I was really hurt and whenever he would call me I would ignore him. His ex would constantly threaten me telling me that I should stay away from them that I better not ruin her happiness. On my birthday, Joseph came to see me and we ended up arguing over his now fiancee. I cried a lot, it was the worst way to start my 23rd birthday. His babies were born and he still wanted me to be part of his life and asked for forgiveness for all the mean things he said. I forgave him but I told him that I didn't want to be part of his life and to please leave me alone then he told me I was a cold hearted immature girl. We said so many things to each other. I moved on, we lost contact. Then this past May we saw each other at a mutual friends party and he smiled at me and told me I looked beautiful. I looked away and he kissed me and said "I still think about you everyday" I pushed him away and slapped him and told him to never do that again and I left. He went after me and I told him to go away with his wife he said "i didn't marry her" I asked "why?" he said "I don't love her. It doesnt matter if I have kids with her I love them and you but not her" and I said "stop lying! Leave me alone!" & he said "is that what you really want" and I said "yes.." and he said "fine" and he left. Two days ago I receive a call from his mom telling me that he passed away in a car crash and I feel like shit because I wasn't able to tell him how I felt I was just really hurt.I wish I can see him again but it won't ever happen :"(