Searching for "first date"

16 Results For 'first date'

Megan

September 24, 2011 @ (MO)

I started seeing this boy back in April. On our first date he told me he was bipolar. I asked him if he was taking medication for it, and he said no. This, of course, worried me, but I was understanding and empathetic. I continued to talk to him, and we realized that we had many things in common. The more we talked, the more I started to like him. On the third date, he told me that he has been dealing with self-injury for the past six years. I was a little shocked that he would share something so personal to someone he just met, but I took it as a sign that he trusted me enough to tell me these things. He also told me that he didn't think he was in a place to be in a relationship at that moment in his life. I understood. After that date, he continued to text me everyday and we continued to see each other about twice a week. Things progressed very quickly and became very intense. A few weeks later, he told me that he had been diagnosed with boderline personality disorder, and that he also had an eating disorder (which I was starting to suspect). I asked him if he was getting help for any of these things, and he said no. I asked him what I could do to help him, and he said nothing. This was all becoming too much for me, but I had started to develop deep feelings for him, and didn't want to abandon him. I was starting to fall in love with him, and I trusted him enough to have sex with him (he was my first). We talked about us and our relationship, and he was still firm that he didn't want or need a relationship. At that point, however, I felt like we were in one, and was very hurt with his decision not to move forward. We broke up soon after that. At the time I thought we were breaking up because we both wanted different things. I wanted to move forward and start a relationship with him, and he did not.

One week (yes, ONE WEEK) after we broke up, he removed me as a friend on facebook and changed his facebook profile picture to him and this girl. A mutual friend told me that he was "in a relationship' with this new girl. After trying to contact him to figure out what the hell was going on, he simply stated that I was not what he needed.

This whole situation has taught me alot about mental illness and what it means to be romantically involved with someone who has one (or many). If someone tells you they have borderline personality disorder and are not in therapy or seeking any sort of help for it, RUN. If you stay, you will only end up getting hurt. Because they will leave you and replace you in a second.

Jeanice

May 13, 2011 @ (San Diego)

Tags: 1

This is the second day of a breakup cleanse that I am doing. Yesterday I did not feel as sad as I am feeling today. I feel silly because this guy and I had only gone out for three months and it seems silly to feel so sad. I am 43 and Honestly this is the First time I fell in love. I just felt deeply connected with him and the moment we sat and talked I knew I loved him. It was the strangest feeling I had ever had. It was something deep down within. Also the more I was with him the more I felt as if I was falling in love. Since it was the first time maybe it wasn't supposed to work out I don't know. I know that from our first date he did as I said in my previous post(yesterday) he spoke a lot about his ex. OMINOUS Warning I failed to heed FOR SURE. I know for the future I will run so fast if I see the guy is unavailable. Yet I see with all of the intimacy problems I had had, hence being 43 and NEVER having been in love, there were DEFINITE issues. I see that in many ways he was safe for me to fall in love with. He was amazing with me, and I really do feel that he did care deeply for me. I also got to find out that the feeling of falling in love happened within ME !!! Which is so great because I know it is not all HIM so if he leaves the scene I can still have that LOVE feeling within me. YIPPPPPEEEEEEE for that. I also know that because I love him as much as I feel I do he can be a great friend. I must admit I am still having hopes that it can work out. I will let him go as the saying goes (I am paraphrasing) If you love something set it free if it comes back to you it was yours if it doesn't it never was AAAAHHHHHHH I have tried in the past to hold so tightly to things and it always has caused so much pain. I just want to fall in love and get married, to have a lifelong partner. SO there I am !!!!

NoNeedToKnow

November 22, 2010 @ (France)

Tags: depression, self-esteem

I had this friend that was going through some stuff just like I was. Both him and I were very depressed and so we started talking with one another. One thing after another, we ended up dating.
He lived in another city, so we couldn't see each other much but we talked/emailed each other nonstop everyday. We both thought things were pretty serious. On our official first date, he told me that he loved me and we had our very first kiss. And of course, this is lame but I had felt something when he kissed me. The very next day, he told me on the phone that we had to breakup. His mother told him to not date me for my good. She was afraid that he'd hurt me. I was really torn and depressed but we continued being friends but "with benefits." So it basically still felt like we were still dating. We'd still talk on the phone whenever we could and he'd always tell me that he loves me and other romantic things.
........But then I find out ONLINE that he started going out with this girl WHILE he was still talking with me and saying all that sweet stuff. And to add to it, I found out two WEEKS after they were dating. I was so pissed off and torn that I yelled at him to never talk to me. AND he had the nerve to say that he'd breakup with her if I wanted him to. I didn't want to hurt the other girl and so I told him to do whatever he wanted. He broke up with her and I added her as a friend on ----------. She blabbed out everything to me and said that they were true loves and etc. Then she had the nerve to say that he never liked me in the first place and that he was just thinking that he had feelings for me but in reality, he was madly in love with her.
Things got worse when I wanted to get the truth from him but I couldn't get into contact with him at all. But luckily, I was best friends with his sister and she told me about some things that he told her when he was dating me. He didn't feel anything when we kissed and he felt like he was pressured into saying that he loves me. She did me a favor and did a 3-way phone call and I listened into their conversation. I know it was wrong to do so but it cleared everything up. I heard him say that I reminded him of her ex from 3 years ago and so thats why he dated me. I became depressed and sad from that point on.
There were moments where I thought to myself that I should hate him for everything but I couldn't bring myself to do that. I blamed myself for it. I blamed myself for not noticing that he cut the time we usually talk together down. I blamed myself and said to myself that I deserved it. Even now, I think how could a plain girl like me ever get a guy like him to like me....I eventually gave up and now I don't enjoy everyday life and feel like I have to drag myself to make it through the day...

Rosie

August 04, 2010 @ (USA)

Tags: pregnancy, birthday

Today is my 16th birthday. I'm five months pregnant; my boyfriend (well, ex now) and I had been going out for nearly a year. I loved him very much. We did everything together, even well into the pregnancy. He said we'd always be together, etc. He went out of town and I didn't see him for two weeks, during which time he didn't contact me at all. When he got back, he was frustrating and distant. But yesterday, he came over and said he wanted to take a step back because he was overwhelmed with how I've become a different person (of course I have; I'm pregnant and the stress he's putting on me is only making it worse). We compromised by agreeing to still hang out once or twice a week, not see anybody else, and let our relationship rebuild itself naturally. But he agreed to take me out to dinner and a movie today, since it's my birthday. It would be kind of like a first date all over again. And I was OK with that. I waited all day for him. When he was hours late, I finally texted him. Over a text message, he told me he was busy with some other girl and that we shouldn't see each other anymore. The baby will be born in a few months, at which point she'll go to live with adoptive parents. And I thought THAT on its own would be painful enough....

John L.

July 20, 2010 @ (Orlando)

Tags: 8 year dream

I was with a girl for 7.5 months. When we first met she told me that she was going to try and get back together with her ex.8 years earlier I had begged God to show me the girl I was to marry. I had seen this girl and her dad for 8 years in my dreams and had been looking every day. 2 days before my 23 b-day,I took her out to dinner and it was my first date.We ended up hanging out more and more. FOund out later she was with a guy I knew and was having sex. I am a true Christian and wanted to show her that sex wasn't how you loved someone it was just being with the that mattered most. Her ex had messed up her head. I got drunk for the first time forher and apparently I woke up next morning with no clothes on. I lost my virginity.To me it was the most sacred thing I wanted to give my wife to say this is all that I am and I am giving it to you. We ended up doing it a lot and I thought she would stay with me. She was talking with her ex the whole time and I hated that but was trying to show I cared. He came back 4 two weeks and she had sex with him. I had just given her a 200 dollar pair of earrings saying the night before don't forget about me. She came back and we were together for a few months then she started working at a place full of guys then the there was no contact with her. I was like what the crap. She didnt tell me anything. I had nightmares of me being in the room while she was having sex with a guy I had never seen. Later found out she was seeing a guy from work. And that she had finally broken up with her ex.
I said is there any way that we could start over since she now had a clear head. No. She never once loved me or had feelings for me. They were all transferred from her ex to me. Sorry.
In the end I gave my virginity so she wouldn't go to another guy who would use her for sex,gave her my heart, mind, body and soul. I waited 8 years for this girl and she took everything and said it meant nothing. Now I am afraid to even ask a girl out because I believed in her. One time after sex she was like what is your favorite part. aka on her body. I pointed to her heart. I never wanted sex. I kept telling her it was just holding her hand, being in her arms, and looking into her eyes that made me forget everything. Now I fear she is destroying her future. All I can do is pray