Searching for "ass"

320 Results For 'ass'

Jake

January 31, 2011 @ (Philadelphia )

Tags: Hesh1

I met this girl at work and I felt something when I first laid eyes
On her. We were talking for about 7-8 months. I did everything for her, i treated her like any girl would love to be treated. However she's only 20 and I'm 26, I don't know if it's the age thing but it kills
Me I was always there for her and out of no where she tells me she doesn't think i was the one for her, apparently i was funny enough so she says, then I try to talk to her and she then tells me she doesnt think I'm the one. But if only I acted myself around her she would she that I am a fun guy to be around and things could be different but she's being a dick treating me like a ass and I never even cheated on her. Fml

Maximilian

January 25, 2011 @ (Arizona)

Tags: Tiffany, Mike, Jessica

To MaryAnn, and the rest of you! Thanks for the link to this site, but none of this is news to me; between Facebook and MySpace, I know all the crap you sneaky little twits are always pulling on each other. Nice to see how much office time you people waste on the internet when you're supposed to be making me money!

Jessica killing herself may have been tragic. But, we all knew her clock was wound a little too tight for the corporate world so it was probably just a matter of time before she cashed in her chips anyway.

As for Tiff's little deception, well, I require an aggressive attitude by my salespeople. Those who succeed in this world are those who are willing to do whatever it takes to win! Not only do I admire her grit, but also her unconventional tactics. I will probably give her a raise! Mary, you should spend more time reading Sun Tzu, and a hell of a lot LESS time meddling in other peoples private affairs!

NOW, all of you assholes GET BACK TO WORK, before I fire the lot of you!

Patricia

January 23, 2011 @ (cedar rapids, ia)

Tags: example 1, example 2

I was befriended on Facebook by a hot guy who had 10 mutual friends as me. He said in the first message "You look sooooo familiar...blah blah blah..." We talked back n forth via FB and txting for a few weeks before he asked me to come over for dinner (he was cooking). RED FLAG ignored by me!! So I went over (stupidity), we had a great time talking, laughing and had a lot in common. We watched a movie, kissed, and so on. That night on my way home he sent a text: you are wonderful!! we talked and text everyday. He asked me out the next night. It was awesome! Then 2 more days that week we got together. he was talking about taking me places, doing stuff together and how beautiful I was. Well, the day after our last date, I didn't hear from him. I sent a txt, he responded 3 hours later...with no XO's or happy faces. Then I didn't hear from him ALL weekend so I sent him an email monday night asking what's going on in a very friendly way. He responded that I'm a wonderful girl, but something just didn't feel right. I kept him as a friend on FB. Yesterday his status changed to "in a relationship". I'm kicking my own ass for falling for that player. DELETE FRIEND!!! I'm really having a hard time understanding why I was so easy and available to him. He dissed me and it was probably someone he was dating before me. I couldn't believe it!

Tiffany

January 16, 2011 @ (Arizona)

Tags: Mike, suicide girl

I just ended a relationship with the worlds most gullible man. I used to work as a personal assistant for his fiance Jessica, but when Mike used this website to break up with her, she hung herself because she miscarried. Course, Mike freaked out when he found out she was dead and she had been carrying his baby. He used the money she left him to go on a weeks long booze and drug binge. Not a real surprise to me, cause I used the lure of some good weed to get his ass back to my house on Halloween and make him believe I was pregnant with his kid. I knew he would act like the ass he was and break up with Michelle, and I knew that would make Michelle fall apart 'cause she was a mentally fragile wall flower, desperately in need of attention. After she killed herself on New Years Eve, Mike left me all her things and went and got high. He spent two days at her grave, drinking and getting high. Now I just left him at rehab and and cleaning out his apartment. Bye "M&M" lol, thanks for the new car, clothes and job!

Brandee

December 27, 2010 @ (Boulder City Nevada)

Tags: Cameron Cuny

Let's see. It's December... 6months ago.

I was dating this doucher, and I met someone online.He was, perfect? No, perfect is an under-state-ment. Anywys, we fell in love. We both did, instantly.

God, I'm getting flash backs; we celebrated Fourth of July together. July 3rd we met and fell inlove, and became the greatest relationship ever. Hours and Hours on the phone, everynight. Webcams, phones, Im's. But, everyone was right.. Long distance doesn't work.

Anyways... We were amazing, but we only lasted a short time. I remember the breakup so vividly. I was high off of life, hanging out with my best friend, walking home, and as I passed the alleyway across the way from my alley, I got a phone call from my baby. I remember him talking to his buddy breifly, and then getting serious. He just explained to me that it wasn't working. He then asked, if I was alright, and with tears in my eyes, I replied yes. He told me if I needed to cry I could.

Oh I needed to cry alright. But I told him I didn't want him to have to hear it for, I didn't want him to feel bad. I told him I had to go...

My friend Devin was concerned.

I turned around, facing away from her, and cried, silent at first.

I tried to walk, i was so shaken, I couldn't walk, so I stumbled and fell. I sat against the wall, and Devin rushed over. I just started to scream. I couldn't breath, and I was screaming. Devin helped me up while I was still bawling, and she hugged me. I was so crushed. It felt as if he took a kife, rammed it into my heart, and then twisted the blade. After about an hour, I regained enough of my composure to get home..
As sooon as I was in my room, I began to cry again. I turned up my music and cried. After like... roughly 3 hours, Devin went home. I never stopped crying.

I did something I have never done before too.
I became numb. I was in such denial. It was so not over.

I couldn't even feel my heartbeat anymore, and pathetically, I cut myslef. I didn't want to die, I was making sure I was still alive.

He called me. I swear, I just sat there, with the phone muted, crying, screaming, not breathing. he was apologizing. Which broke my heart even more, causing me more pain.

This was the first guy, the first person I have ever felt love for, and he does this too mee? I would tell everyone exactly why he broke up with me, stupid reson, but I don't want to be mean. Why would anyone do this to me? My first real true heart break.. and it still haunts me. 6 MONTHS LATER! Why?

I have cried so many times, just at random, and if any of my friends even say his name, itnsta-cry. Little things remind me of him. Especially the song, It's Not Over- Second HandSerenade. I have listened to it atleast 100 times in the last couple hours. It's 3:46 in the morning.. I have officially been crying for 3 hours. Yay. what an accomplishment. Are you happy Cameron? Knowing that the fucking thought of you makes me cry. And when i do cry, I can't breath. I put myself through hell, for you. And what's even worse... I still love you.

-Brandee.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZmvJknzLfU&feature=related

Mike Hawke

December 24, 2010 @ (Arizona)

Tags: christmas, secretary

I am currently at my girl friends house, using her computer. Its Christmas Eve, and she's sleeping on the couch cause we just got done having sex all night. SO, here comes the break up!

She doesn't know but I have been sleeping with her secretary, Tiffany, for the last two months. We met at the Halloween party, and when I said I was giving "Randy" a ride home, I had actually taken Tiff back to our house and screwed her in our bed. (yes honey, on those sheets you bought in Italy.) Now you know why they smelled like Chanel, when you wear DKNY.

So, later when I leave this web page open, and tell you I'm going to the store for cigarettes and you begin to wonder why I don't come back and wont answer my phone, Its because I'm spending Christmas at Tiff's house and I'm dumping your Dean and Deluca gobbling fat ass!

By the way, Tiff says she's giving her notice and good luck finding a new secretary you "slave driving bitch".

Oh, and if you want to know the "why", remember how you said your career was more important than having kids or even me? Well, our baby (Tiff's and mine)is due in July and we will be expecting a gift! Good luck with that career thing! and MERRY CHRISTMAS! Ho Ho Ho.

Heart Broken

November 24, 2010 @ (md)

Tags: ?

Well i was 15 when i meet this guy who did magic.He caught my attention so i built the courage to ask he to skip class with...remember i just met him.so he said yes and we went to a lake near our middle school.when ended up kissing and it felt so right...so we went out.unfortunately it was to much of a physical relationship so we broke up over the summer.my mom was so glad because she hated him.then school came around and we got back together and things were so different.i loved it,i loved him.and loved me.then we end up breakin up again over the phone when i was in a different country.so when i come back we start talkin and clearing things out.turns out he cheated on me with his best friend who just happened to come from illinois when i left to nicaragua.nice right.he ripped my heart out right from my chest and threw it into a fire.no matter how much i wanted to hate him, i couldnt.then school comes around again and now im 16.Neither of us wants to give up on us being together.we think we are the ones for each other.shit is so complicated right now with us.we fight one day and then the next we are happy to see each other.and now to boot; a friend of mine comes out sayin he has like me since last year.truthfully when we are texting i like hm to.but then when we are at school there is no spark.i dont find him attractive.but is still love talkin to him cause he makes me smile.i dont know what to do.i cant deny the love i still have for my ex bf.

Lil Fatty

November 10, 2010 @ (Cali)

Tags: Dirty Sanchez

I went to Spencer's last week and saw this hilarious book entitled Dirty Sanchez Nation: The Ultimate Illustrated DICKtionary of Obscene Sex Terms. I had to get it, and being the pig that I am, at least try some of the terms with the chick I've been hooking up with. So I figured start off small. I've given her facials a few times, but this time I told her it was my fantasy to pee on her (golden shower p. 40). She was a little apprehensive at first but eventually let me do it in the shower.

The next night, we got into some really hot sex and I was nailing her form behind when I decided to do the Tony Danza (p 109). I asked her "Who's the boss?" They she turned her head back and said "what?". Then I smacked her in the face (lightly) and said "Tony Danza bitch!" Needless to say wasn't happy and threw me off.

She was kind of getting on my nerves lately and I kind of wanted her to break up with me so I figured I'd go for gold. A few days later we meet up and started to have make up sex (isn't it just fabulous). So I'm banging her from behind and I figured why not be a pig. I stuck my finger in her butt. She kind of liked it. But unbeknownst to her suddenly I discovered some nuggets. Oh yes, this was the grand finale. I pulled the finger out and reached around and gave her a shit stache to remember!

There she was - Dirty Sanchez in the flesh. I was officially the biggest asshole on the planet. She cursed me out and ran out. Haven't heard from her since. This book has got me messed up. But for some reason I can't put it down and stop laughing.

Ashley B-Brown

November 07, 2010 @ (atlanta)

Tags: tragedy

So there was this guy that I met at 15 when I moved to my new school. He was 16 and I remember when we first met, I felt electricity and I couldn't take my eyes off him...how cheesy is that? Ever since then we've never been able to completely be away from each other and for a while he was all I had. We've never been officially a couple due to a few problems. One, we fight like cats and dogs. In the beginning I held back and whenever he would say hurtful things I would try to avoid him but then he would just get mad and say that I was running away. That didn't last because eventually I got tired of taking his shit, and that's when the fights really started picking up. He lies, he tries to make things seem as if they're my fault, and frankly he is the biggest asshole I've ever met.

Here's where it gets even crazier we would stop talking for a month after the fights and then he would come back and we would start it up all over again. As we got older though, there were a few things that were brought to my attention. Any time I made a new friend at school, if he knew them, he would tell me not to be friends with them. Turns out, he has tried to sabotage 90% of the friendships I made, as if he was trying to keep me isolated. If I had even thought about dating another guy, he would get pissed but if he dated someone else then I'm bitter. I even remember on one of his drunken nights, he called me and told me that as much as he hated me, he wanted to be with me.

I knew that a lot of our pent up frustration was partially due to the fact that we didn't have sex. So, in the year that I turned 18 we had sex. It was pretty amazing and it actually helped. But of course, it didn't last..Skipping on threw, I went to college and he doesn't go to college so we stopped speaking b/c of another girl and when she broke up with him, he came to me. Btw that's what he does, whenever a girl hurts him, he finds me. So he started talking to me more, and he gained my trust again and when I went home for spring break we met on a car port surrounded by buildings, beautiful and romantic lol. And summer came around and we were having frustration fussing so we had sex. That's when everything became functional, until he got worried that I was pregnant. We don't use condoms and I'm not on the pill, DUMB. Thank god, I wasn't pregnant and so I went back to school. We kept in touch regularly until october and I hadn't heard from him until this morning. We had a small fight and he said that he misses me but I need to grow up and that we could talk when I learn how! Rude much, so I called him a dumb unnecessary bitch and blocked him. I'm not dumb, I go home in two weeks, so he's trying to fix his shit before i come home. So I know he'll contact me. that's pretty much why I blocked him so he'll have no choice but to text or call me. In the beginning this chaos was fun, but now that I'm older I just want stability. This was the first real fight we've had in a year so things have been getting better. But I just can't get passed that he hasn't even tried to talk to me for more than a month. I love him so much it hurts. I've loved him even before he took my virginity. He truly is the man I want to be with for the rest of my life. But people in hell want ice water. He can't let me go, and I can't let him go either. He has a few issues. He's had a pretty rough life, and I'm the only girl who has stayed and that scares him. Guys I've spoked to about this have told me, that I'm the one who could truly destroy him. He himself has told me that I have more power over him than I realize. Even when we have sex, it's not mindless fucking, it's quite emotional and he's the one that wants to be gentle with me while I want to get a little wild lol. He wanted me to stay in atlanta for school, and frankly I think that's what I should have done. There is another guy and there is another girl but unfortunately they're now part of a list of people that are for the purpose of taking our minds off of the other. They've been caught up in the tragedy of me and dylan. I just hope we learn to really love each other before we destroy each other.

Al Murjan

November 03, 2010 @ (Seattle )

Tags: interracial, passion, lonely

He broke up with me multiple times. He had a double standard for everything. He was angry all the time, stressed out all the time, did not take personal initiative to try to improve his life outside of blaming me, he was cruel and disrespectful. After his stress and depression finally ate through my calm I lost it and screamed and broke a glass. I made a few mistakes but I was walking on glass almost the whole relationship. After so many fights, he called it quits for good. We started with having so much passion for each other, more than I may ever have again. He went so far as to tell me he hates me and that I'm such a low person. I know better though, and bless his cotton socks, I miss him.