Searching for "funny breakup"

17 Results For 'funny breakup'

Ritchi

August 19, 2016 @ (Toronto )

Got dumped like a shit donkey! I'm writing this at 4:30 am. She literally called me at 2 am to tell me she's done. At first I laughed my assoff cuz I thought it was like joke cuz I like to joke around people. We talked, realized it wasn't a joke. I go on to check on her ig and fb status, I'm blocked!
So her friend told me that she lost interest in our relationship in January and she has been hanging out with some karate kid for a long time. Can't bear this!

Violet

July 29, 2016 @ (Ireland)

Tags: funny breakup, bad breakup

So I met him through my 2 best friends. And he tried convincing me to go out with him, because he was 'a nice guy', when he knew I liked the bad boys ;)....so I gave him a chance. He blind sighted me. I
gave him all the trust in the world So guess what the fucking prick did?? Send pics of his stupid fkn cock to my friend and would message random girls, and still to this day I find out about a different girl each week. He can go fuck himself in the asshole. That stupid cocksucking loser fuck bag.

Lindsay

July 29, 2016 @ (Australia )

Tags: bad breakup , funny breakup

So I dated a piece of shit for 4 years. 4 fucking years with a log of shit. Can you imagine that? And the whole time I thought he was the one, the best thing that ever happened to me, my other half....when really now I realise he was a fucking turd nugget. So whatever now that he left me he can keep his stink to himself. Fuck that asshole. piece of shit.

Liam

January 29, 2016 @ (London)

Tags: Bad Breakup, Funny Breakup

So, on Friday evening two weeks ago my partner of six years dumps me out the blue on my door step, half an hour after texting me that she would picking up a pizza for us on her way home. So yeah, that happened.

William

October 29, 2015 @ (Australia)

Tags: Bad Breakup, Funny Breakup

After recovering from a rough two years of isolating heart ache, I finally felt happy within myself. I reunited with my old high school crush, who's company needless to say was pure enlightenment and began to build a strong, trusting relationship. we spent weeks at a time going back and forth between each others homes until my father had become ill and required my share of over night care and regular visits. so my girlfriend would make use of the spare time by going out with her friends reviving her old night life. i was endorsing her late night adventures and encouraged her to have fun while i was away; as i had complete trust in her loyalty.

As it was necessary for me to be away for some odd days of the week, it was common for my friend to regularly turn up unannounced at my home, this time to her welcoming hospitality. This i thought was positive company as he had previously supported me through my years of isolation which ended some few months before.

I became excited to have my relationship compatible with my friendship as i hadn't as much spare time for my friend as i had done during my great depression. though it dawned on me that my girlfriend had developed a noticeable distance that had become to evolve either from the nights out with the girls or to the least of my suspicion my closest childhood friend.

Until one morning on my way home from my fathers house i had thought to stop in to my friend's home with the intention of beginning one of my few days of rest, out with this friend.

Only to find my girlfriend under his sheets, sitting upright by her elbow staring daringly into my eyes as if to spell out the inappropriate deed i had committed by walking into the house unannounced.

Two days later i had met a stranger in the street in attempt to salvage my newly found personal strength. leading me to a small friendly gathering, a gathering of which was attended by my original break up accomplice looking ever so happy hand in hand with her new found lover.

..Aint ..Love ..Grand

Maxwell

June 09, 2015 @ (Canada)

Tags: funny breakup?

So just wondering if anyone else has had a similar dating experience. I was casually dating a girl for about a month and a half, but we had been talking everyday for about two and a half months. We were taking things slow, and one day we were on our way to the park (were I planned to talk to her about how she felt things were going) when I got struck by car. I was projected onto my head and was brought to the hospital trauma unit due to the nature of my bloody head. I surprisingly came out of it in pretty good shape, except for a mild concussion that has been lingering for over a month now. She stayed with me that night and over the weekend our communication was intimate and she even mentioned about making me dinner as I was in recovery. Then bang, she 180s and decides she is not ready for a relationship thus ending our dating experience. So basically, I got hit by a car while walking with her and the next week she decides that she doesn't want to continue. Not going to lie, it messed me up a bit going through a traumatic experience like that, and then having the person who you thought could support you a little pull the chute.

B

April 04, 2015 @ (rosewood)

Tags: Bad breakup, Heartless , Funny breakup

When I was 14 there was this 15 year old boy who had the hugest crush on me I ignored him and played it off as a joke since he was currently dating my cousin . Two year later he find me again and was so desperate , U couldn't stand to reject h again , He was so shy , He wanted me to kiss him , I never did . I didn't like him He wanted me to have sex with him , of course I didn't After four months together he started getting full of it like he was goes gift to women an he thought I was cheating on him . While he been fussing another boy was flirting with me and he said he loves me so much he'll wait for when I'm single . But I'm not that mean to break up with someone to bbe with someone else . I bared with him for some more weeks then on valentines day he was saying stuff like he don't need me , he can get another girl , I said fine and broke up with him there . since then he is trying to get back with me but its too late I'm now happy with the other boy

Best Decision

January 18, 2015 @ (a place)

Tags: funny breakup, breakup

Okay so I was with my boyfriend for not that long, And I have to say when I broke up with him it was the best decision in my life! He was a 10th grader and I was in 11th grade but we had the same age and he was older than me but I skipped a grade. We talked for 4 months and we started a new year in school he finally asked me out. After 3 days of dating he told me he 'loved' me. I was shocked because it was to early to love someone. He never took me out in a date, he never wanted to hang out, only at school might I add AND we talked for 1 or 2 a day. I was miserable. I hated being with him, we was so immature and so cocky for his own good. When we on break I asked to hang out and he told me no because we were only to hang out at school.. After our 1 month (we were on break) he told me he loved me again and got pissed when I didn't say it back. We then got into an argument and he told me that I was using him and a bunch load of crap just because I didn't say 'I love you' back. It was to early to say it and 'love' to me is a special word. So then a week later (still on break) I told him to stop talking s*xual to me because I didn't like it and it made me feel uncomfortable. He got mad at me again saying our conversations were boring so thats why he talked 'dirty' to me! I told him why he never asked about my day, how I was and why couldn't we talk normal. Then we got into another conversation *WARNING* He told me the stupidest sh*t ever... He blamed me that he was failing because of me! (Mind you we have been dating a month almost 2) He said that his parents got pissed at him because his grades and he said I was the reason because of it. We NEVER hanged out, We talked for 1 HOUR OR 2 a day. So how his grades were falling I DONT KNOW!. I told him that it wasn't my fault it was his because he had no reason what so ever to tell me the cra*p. A few days he started talking about marriage, I told him that I wasn't comfortable with the subject since hence our situation and that we weren't dating that long to talk about that and I told him longer people have been dating longer to talk about it. He then asked me which couples *face palm* I then told him the couples who have dated 1 years. He got mad and that's when I had it. I broke up with him and I feel like the chains were lifted off my ankles and my wings were spread and I could be free once again. Now he wants to get back together but no way am I going back to h*ll.

Kenny

January 08, 2015 @ (Wisconsin)

Tags: So Sorry! Funny Breakup

ok, so i was in 8th grade. i was dating this girl for 2 years through sophmore year. we seemed perfectly fine untill one night we were at a movie she seemed down so afterwards i asked her what was up. she told me that her grandmother was very sick and could die so she said she didnt have time for a relationship. i said ok i understand. we broke up and stayed friends. 2 weeks later at a football game i was hanging out with my friends and saw her making out with this dude. he is shirtless just like completely eating her face. so i confront them and this dude picks up his shirt and runs away so afraid of me and she says dont hurt him its my fault. and i said well no shit its your fault. so i chase the dude down a road till he gets so tired he cant run no more. he says bro im sorry i didnt know you were here...i..i so i say no shit dumbass so punch him and then my ex 'Livy' grabs me from behind and kisses me. im like what the fuck and push her away. she says "Kenny im sorry i love you and the stuff i said about my grandma wasnt true" so i say fuck you bitch go with the little fat fuck that u were makin out with behind the bleachers with his rolls stickin out. so now its 2 weeks later and shes still dating him. (cant believe it) i dont even know why i loved her... and for all of you men and women that get lied to by your boyfriend or girlfriend. just think. there are 3.5 trillion girls in the world and you deserve better than the bitch that lied to you

Anonymous

November 11, 2014 @ (Miami, FL)

Tags: Funny breakup, bad, ridiculous

Well it comes to a very funny ending my friends... I was with this guy i really loved and still love at this moment for months then one day i felt like he was going to break up with me so before that even happened i asked him if he needed space but later i saw the 3 dots in the message and i told him if you're going to break up with me dont do it through text at least call me... 3 seconds later i get a call i was already belligerent and ecstatic... After telling me how such a great person i am and that he still loves me he says "hold up, mom can you pass me the ketchup" as the call end with me hanging up he broke up with me through the phone while eating dinner with his family. Pass me the ketchup always gets me till this day