Searching for "change"

195 Results For 'change'

Jenny

November 29, 2014 @ (Tampa FL)

Dylan and I were never an official couple. But we went on dates and met each others family. i could tell i was falling in love with him from the start. No one had ever made me feel how he made me feel. I went over to his house to have dinner with him and his family and the whole time i could feel something was wrong. After dinner he took me home and asked me how i felt about being his girlfriend and i told him id love that. He said he wasn't ready for it though so like why did he even ask me? So then he starts talking about how he's graduating soon and it was all just really depressing hearing about how he had to leave. We're standing in front of my house and i cant recall anything that we said to each other other than the fact that he was ending things. Even though it was over he still kissed me, and in my heart I knew there was nothing i could do to change his mind. I went to bed crying and as soon as i woke up for school i fell apart. I will never forget the feeling when my mom came in and started crying with me. Because of him I cant let anyone else in. He blamed the breakup on him not wanting to date anyone in high school as he was going to college but the thing that really gets me is finding out that only 1 week after we ended, he was going on dates with another girl in my grade.

Ren

November 10, 2014 @ (England)

Tags: Bad breakup, cheating, Sad, heartbroken, young, betrayal, boyfriend, depression

I was with my boyfriend for 3 years, roughly. Heâ€™s cheated on me around 7 times, and broken up with me for another girl. He always comes back to me in the end, and of course, I love him so much that I always take him back. This is my first serious relationship and itâ€™s killing me. He was always telling me to change, and made me feel really bad about myself at times. He would also always talk about his exâ€™s in a negative way and call them psychopaths, but now Iâ€™m starting to relies that he did that to them through his manipulation, and I too am falling victim to it. We would break up once every two weeks on average, usually because I would bring something up about him cheating, and he would figure out some way to spin it round on me. Every time we broke up, I felt worthless. Some days I wouldnâ€™t even get out of bed. As soon as we got back together Iâ€™d be happy again and it felt like an instant weight had been lifted off my chest. Until the next break up that is. On Saturday he went to a â€˜friendsâ€™ house and switched his phone off all night. I told him I was done with him, and the next day he text me agreeing that we should end things for good.
I obviously begged him to stay and told him that I didnâ€™t mean what I said but he hasnâ€™t replied and won't answer his phone. I know I canâ€™t keep going through this as it is making me so depressed. But I canâ€™t stand to be away from him. I donâ€™t know if this really is the final break up. I just donâ€™t know what to do anymore.

Anonymous

November 10, 2014 @ (Canada)

Tags: painful

My history start when i left my back home to came and study in Canada. That was the first time when i was about to start living on my own. I didn't have any acquaintances in this unknown country. Luckily when i cam here i got a guy from the same nationality of mine who has been here for a very long time and was very helpful. He was a married guy yet he was so very helpful and all i was thinking was that his wife was aware that he was helping a girl who just moved in this country. Gradually we became friend and he did a lot for me but innocent as i was i never realized that behind this help of his was a different mind. he came to narrate to me how his wife and how their relationship doesn't work though living under the same roof and in doing he gain my pity and he gradually manipulated me in such a way that he made me felt in love with him and gradually forced me for sex when i mentioned to him no i want to loose my virginity for the one i get married. While being in this relationship he mentioned about his exes and he mentioned about one who still keep in touch as friend. I was like friend okay that's fine but each time he was taking me out or something he was always texting but i never realized that he would be texting her that much. he even took me to buy gifts and out of the blue he got her a gift as well and told me as a friend i was like okay when one day lying next to me i saw a text with the girl saying i love you and i miss you and i asked what was that and he said she still says so what can i do. After that his behaviour changed with me, he stopped texting or calling me and this was bothering so much that i had to ask what was happening and on the day of my exam he told we can't continue. i broke up and was so depressed but its after only that i came to know the reason was that he went back to her. After a couple of months he came back to me saying sorry and we started talking and my mistake was that i forgave him and accepted him again and after couple months he did the same thing he went back to her. I really cannot move on it been dragging for so long that i have been trying to move and thought we don't have anything to do together i keep sending him text each time he is online i tell me he is texting her or if his car isn't here i will say you meeting her and i kept asking why you did this and that and i can't stop monitoring him. i am fed up with my life.

Lyzza

November 01, 2014 @ (Berlin)

Tags: Bad break up

Well me and my boyfriend were together for over 4 years. Like many people say the first year was great we were always happy we loved spending time with each other every second of everyday. Then things started to change. He became distant and he never seemed interested in seeing me or talking to me. I started not to feel right about our relationship but I was desperate to be with him. I found out that he was cheating on me for 3 months straight! I was devastated and I didn't know what to do because I had such strong feelings for him. He never apologized for cheating but I took him back anyway. Our relationship has been rocky this whole entire time' for 3 years. He is constantly comparing me to the girl he cheated on me with. He's always pointing out everything that I do wrong and he never let's me be myself. Everything is always blamed on me. He's broken up with me again for someone else and again I took him back. He break up on average every 2 weeks and I hate it. I always feel terrible I always feel at fault. Days go by that he will just ignore me. I want this relationship to work so bad but he won't put any work forward it's always me. I'm not sure what to d anymore.

Gu

October 22, 2014 @ (China)

Tags: Bad breakup, love is about letting go

I consider her the most important girl in my life. Let me tell you why.

Before I dated her, I had three previous relationships.

The first I consider a puppy love; the second I stole her virginity and cheated on her; the third I thought I love her much, but objectively speaking it was too sexual. In between I was also very flirtatious. I love to fool around and usually grow an immediate attraction to those girls who are willing to talk about sex, aka sluts. I was very into sex.

After I got hurt from my last breakup, I told myself I would never believe in love again. So I decided I could just turn back into the old me and flirt around. Eventually, I also slept with someone who wasn't my girlfriend. I also allowed myself to engage in cyber sex with a girl who had a bf back then.

None of this was known about me by the public. I hide it pretty well. I live with a double face life.

All of this ended after I fell in love with this special girl. It was a love at first sight. We had been close friends, maybe even best friends more like 7 to 9 months back then. I just suddenly realize how much care she actually giving me, and how I am actually really attracted to this kind of good girl. So I started showing her my love and fortunately she also loves me. Falling in love with your best friend is just beautiful. (this is coming from a guy)

She is just a pure girl. Someone with good moral values, who can really lead you to the right path. She is also very traditional. So we agree we would have no sex until we are fortunate enough to get married. And since then, for 20 months, we simply make out and have no sex. If you ask the old me, I guess I would have been shocked to know I can live without having sex with my gf. (I rmb I was literally angry when my second gf didn't agree to have sex with me back then; and then I also was very sexually involved with the next gf; and of course that time that I allowed myself to engage in casual sex)

But of course, its more than that. I just realize this kind of life, where I follow good value, be a good guy, no double life is what I truly want. In a sense I realize I had destroyed my integrity with what I did before. All this was only made possible because of her being with me, her loving me.

At the beginning, it turned out she actually knew some of my past. And she said if I am not the same anymore, she is willing to give me a chance. I felt really touched by that. I think that is what being loved feels like: knowing you are a sinner but somehow a great girl still willing to give you another chance to be a better man. I told myself I won't let this girl down ever again.

I hope it's obvious now how special she is to me. In a sense, she was there with me at the right time. Being here with me when I sinned, when learnt from my past and mature enough to know what is right for myself and what is not.

Unfortunately, we didn't last.

The problem was that she somehow dug my old stuff out. My old chat history with my previous girlfriends or sluts that I flirted with. And because of some reason, I also had to tell her about my causal relationship (terribly so, the girl is someone she knows)

It just all started to crumble for her.

As she read those words, she got more and more disappointed at me. She is very upset and hurt for what I did. This might have sth to do with her possible bipolar disorder and family issues that has made her highly insecure. And I am her first bf too. There is a lot going on her mind: insecurity, sharing her guy with many girls, not able to trust my words anymore and so on. So she kept asking for breakups. I tried to save our relationship millions of times already. But her hatred against me and her pain just grew. So finally I agree to try and separate from her...

It's so difficult for me. It's just the first day of not talking to her today. And obviously I am dying. But once I recall what I did, and think about her hurt she is because of me, I know I am making the right decision this time to give her the same she deems.

It's time for me to brave and take care of her. (She has always been the "strong" person in our relationship more often than me) She deserves to be happy. Maybe we can get back together if she can be mature enough to let go of my past. Or maybe can't. Either way I hope she can really be happy. Because I am indeed very happy with her.

She changed me for the better. I am forever indebted to her. I also wouldn't go back to those dark alleys like I once did.

I am changed, forever, because of her. And I am hoping to show her how special and how much I love her, by letting her go...

Lonelyperson

October 11, 2014 @ (Malaysia)

Tags: bad break up, sad break up

The second year of school i was scared... to be in a new class. The first year i never have friends i was always alone always getting bullied. the second year im scared it might be worst.. but.. i met a girl who was so kind and caring for me.. 2 months past we cared each other as friends. its time i told her i loved her.. and on the day she accepted it because she was in love with me also. we been through a lot together. we are always together to fix anything together. one day she started to change into a diffrent person. she dont care me like how she use to she dont love me like how she use to. but i told her i will always love her with all my heart and never leave her. she said she wont give up on us and will be forever with me. we promise each other. one day she said maybe we should break up..she said sorry i give up on us.. sorry i break our promise.. that day.. i never believed in forever anymore.. i cried everyday.. and she was so happy without me. she flirts with other boys. then.. we started talking again.. we got back together again.. after a week the last day of school i told her i will make her happy again. that night i said sweet things and told her how beautiful she was. we had a awesome night. then.. we went to bed. tomorrow her mum found out we where dating she couldnt accept it.. and my GF said sorry i have to leave.. but she said why when she was with her ex her mum accepted it... she said maybe because im not chinese.... and she said.. at least we are friends... everything went crashing down. she started being happy again with out me. i started being alone again.. no friends.. nothing.. and she saved me when i was in a dark room.. she light up my room but now she left.. its worst then before.. i tot we could be married... and.. Grow old together... i wanted to call her.. she said maybe tomorrow.. then tomorrow i ask can i call she pretend she didnt hear it.. and we stop talking.... i just needed.. the phone call.. to tell her how much i love her.. before she leave.. but.. i didnt get that call..

Enamiran

September 05, 2014 @ (algeria)

Tags: sad

i met him 4years ago ,i was playing second life n i wanted to hear music,i dnt really remmeber wat i typed in google searching for music but the download ended up with a window of strangers talking to me,it is imesh,many ppl from all around th word,i added many frens,from every country a fren,n i added him as well,i didnt imagine that i would b with him but we started talking and we really enjyed talking to eatchother,like to th point when i go back from uni th first thing i do is open my pc n chat with him,n i find him always waiting,2months mater we told each other we like eatchother n that time we just seen eatchother in pic ,he was far away from me,we both liked th idea of having a foreign love,we loved eatch other,my familly knew they convince me to step away,n i steped away alitle,i made my self bz,coz it sounded impossible to meet n have a futur toguether,at first i used to fight with him alot,it was fun no hurts,but just arguing with him was fun,he was so calm understanding kind innocent n sinceer(in my toughts) n after every fight he used to tell me how much he loves me n he cant live without me,he always appologyzed even sometimes for meaningless things,i guess i had a kid mind that time :/, anyway, 2years past n we still in love we use evry possible way to contact fb yahoo skype watssapp,later in a day i was too bz with studdy,to th point i guess my feeling were colden,i was talking to him in video n i told him"i think i dnt love u"!! (stupid me) he cried in that moment,i said im sorry,it's ok myb it's just im bz n my mind is not clair,we can try over toguether i can get back my feelings,6months later,a girl talked to him she said she liked him n he talked to her,she was from his country but not very pretty,he hided that on me for a month ,then he tod me i hide it bcoz i know u ll b mad!,i said ok no problem,i enter his fb ,but he changed his password (he gave it to me b4) i ask him when we skype he liyed on th date of changing th fb password to let me think it was b4 he met th other girl,i knew he was lying by th fb notice" u have changed ur fb passeword on...." i got angry n i cut th call i his face,after that he run to her love ,he shut me off for 3days,colden his feelings,n he talked to her instead,i got afraid to lose him n to lose my self in my exams period so i ask him to try again another chance,we back,but since then he act cold with me whenevr we fight,he understood that he could not lose me ( i my self dnt know if he will lose me one day ) n since then he is th 1 who colden his feelings in our breakups n im th one who get depressed n feel like "omg ,he forgot my love,im meaninglesto him"i dnt wat exactly to do to know my value to him,breakup doent give a clue anymore(knowning that th longest breakup we had was for a weak!!)

Not RealName

September 05, 2014 @ (Ohio)

Tags: stalking bad breakup

I dated a guy a year younger than me in high school. The relationship went really well for 5 months. We were in marching band together and were very different people. I was in color guard and he was a clarinet. I was really bubbly and extroverted while he was quiet and sweet. We meshed well with our differences. But he was always too reserved. He never told me what he was thinking, would be quiet often just following me, so I felt emotionally unfulfilled and lonely in the relationship. He also never made any of the first moves. We went to Disney World with our band and we were watching the fireworks over the Disney castle, Tinker Bell flying through the air, the perfect romantic setting. But he never kissed me...and that was one first move I could never make. I wanted to feel wanted.
So I began distancing myself from him. He noticed and started being clingier. He followed me everywhere in school. He would even stand behind me while I ate lunch with friends. It was creepy. Eventually I was on crutches and I felt like a wounded animal while he was stalking his prey. He chased me into the girl's bathroom on crutches with friends trying to protect me. He wasn't violent, just desperate. Then one day that changed.
He was waiting for me to come in and watched me go to my locker. I moved slowly in fear and tried to phone friends to come help me but none of them responded fast enough. So I limped to class and he bolted after me. He kept saying things like "Why won't you talk to me? Just listen to me." I didn't say anything. Then he got so mad he pushed me and I fell into a very rough brick wall. I got scratched by the bricks and it hurt. I screamed for him to go away and he ran off with everyone looking. I got him suspended. But he tried to stalk me for years after that. We never even kissed...
Anyways plot twist: We're getting married now.

Michael

July 03, 2014 @ (New York City)

Tags: #BadBreakup, #ToxicRelationship, #BipolarDisorder, #Crazypeople

I met my ex-girlfriend on an online dating website and things got serious pretty quickly. She had bipolar disorder but was not getting treated. She lived with her parents and had a rocky relationship with her domineering and controlling mother. I always got the impression that her parents viewed my ex-girlfriend as a disappointment in comparison to her two older sisters who were both married with their own families. It seemed like her parents were happy with just about anybody who take my ex-girlfriend off her hands.

Initially I got along with her parents. I attended family gatherings, holidays and even went on a vacation with them. Over time, however, things changed. It started during a dinner we had with her parents. Her mother had a habit of scolding my ex-girlfriend about seemingly petty things. Even though it was an awkward situation that was uncomfortable, her mother was very unapologetic and instead got upset at me for not talking.

After two years together, we started to run into some problems. My ex-girlfriend was pressuring me into getting engaged, mainly so she could get my health insurance and get treated for her bipolar disorder. She even talked about eloping first so she didnâ€™t have to wait to claim my insurance. I started to feel that the relationship was a little one-sided. We practically spent all of our free time together and I was bothered she never showed much interest in any of my hobbies and was always very vocal about how stupid they were. Another problem were her mood swings which often lead to arguments, which occasionally took place in public places.

After we broke up, I went out on my own while my ex-girlfriend immediately jumped into another relationship. Also during that time, her parents sort of relented and allowed her to get treated for her bipolar disorder. After a few months, we both realized that we still had feelings for each other and decided to get back together, promising that things would be different.

At first not everyone was excited that we were back together, mainly her parents. They were upset because they believed her new boyfriend wouldâ€™ve eventually married her and because they believed I had caused my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings. My ex-girlfriendâ€™s mother was upset at me over an incident that happened a year ago that never occurred. Even though my ex-girlfriend believed her, I was suspicious of her mother.

Initially everything seemed to be going great. The relationship was a lot more balanced and because my ex-girlfriend was taking medication she wasnâ€™t getting those mood swings that plagued us last time. Around the holidays, things started to turn. I was driving my ex-girlfriend to the airport and my car got a flat tire. As I pulled into the gas station, she started screaming at me, like she did before she was taking her medication. It was so bad that the attendants felt sorry for me and gave me the replacement tire for free. Even though my ex-girlfriend wrote off the incident as holiday-related stress, it was the first indication that something wasnâ€™t right.

Over the next month, my ex-girlfriend continued to act erratically and decided to break up with me on Valentineâ€™s Day, only to change her mind the following day and the same pattern would occur every few weeks. Also during that time, my ex-girlfriend discovered that her mother had tricked her into not taking her bipolar medication and had told her doctor that she no longer needed them causing her doctor to believe she was misdiagnosed.

Eventually, my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mother began to act even more coldly towards me. During an argument over the phone, I overheard her mother screaming in background and demanded that she break up with me and get it over with. Every time I saw her mother, I tried to be friendly or polite to her but she either scowl at me or storm out of the room. She continued to badmouth me and even made bizarre accusations about me. She claimed that I wasnâ€™t serious about getting married and claimed that I was gay. She even told family members that she didnâ€™t think that I was a nice person.

By the spring, my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings started to get worse. One night, my ex-girlfriend had too much to drink and she started grinding against me at a restaurant. After I quietly pushed her off of me and told her to stop, she started screaming at me and eventually pushed me out the door. When I returned, she continued to scream at me and had to be told to leave by the manager.

On the way home, I told her we were finished but she wanted to talk. She asked for another chance and promised to stop drinking. When I wouldnâ€™t reconsider, she got upset demanded that I get out of her car and kicked me in my ribs and threw a half empty wine bottle out the window. The following day, she changed her mind and tried to convince me to give her another chance. After she got her friends to contact me, I felt like I had no choice but to give in.

In the following weeks. My ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings got worse and she even got pushy and demanding. When I tried breaking up with her again, she again forced me to reconsider and sometimes held me hostage in her house until I reconsidered. Personally I felt trapped. When my ex-girlfriend and I got back together, this was not what I had envisioned. Now I felt depressed and noticed that I had gained weight.

I decided that I needed an outlet for my feelings and decided to sign up for an obstacle course race. My ex-girlfriend immediately thought it was a dumb idea and was upset that I ask her permission. She also hated that I joined a Sunday softball league with a friend, even though she worked on that day. She always expected me to stay home and meet with her after she got off of work.

The night before the race, my ex-girlfriend decided to rehash an old argument about how she felt that I wasnâ€™t committed to her and believed her mother was about me. The argument continued as I was driving her home and when I tried to break up with her again, she lost her temper and started hitting me over the head with a book as I was driving. Afterwards, I was forced to change my mind after she refused to leave my car. The following week, I finally broke up with my ex-girlfriend after I cancelled my plans with her and she furiously berated me on the phone. Unlike last summer, this was for good.

In the months that followed, my ex-girlfriend continued to try to contact me.
Sometimes she scolded me for breaking up with her and occasionally she begged for another chance. She even would scream at remaining mutual friends when they wouldnâ€™t tell her any information they had on me. I also learned that she was in a serious car accident that some of her friends believe might been a suicide attempt. Eventually, she stopped trying to contact me and I learned that she had started dating another guy and was once again taking bipolar medication.

As for me, I rediscovered how to have fun again. I made a lot of new friends on the softball team I joined that summer. It helped that we won the championship and I ended up making the game winning catch. I also lost 50 pounds and have since competed in 3 more obstacle course races. I even started dating again and am currently in the early stages of a new relationship. Itâ€™s been fun and I can't remember the last time I felt this happy or excited about my life.

Carmen

May 29, 2014 @ (United States)

Tags: break-up, annoying, bad person

We were juniors in college when we finally started dating. We'd been friends for a few months and had attended some social functions on campus together. Unfortunately for him, Tom had a terrible reputation on campus, not for being a player or anything, but for being a terrible person in general. My friends constantly reinforced this information before I agreed to date him exclusively. I questioned him about the various rumors regarding him and his only answers involved: "I don't remember," or "That's all in the past." I was extremely skeptical that anyone could change that fast (we'd only been in school for a couple of years!) but I wanted to see who he was for myself so I agreed to go out with him. The next six months were filled with depression and anger for me for a lot for a lot of reasons. For one thing, he would talk about problems we were having with a mutual female friend rather than talking to me about them. I didn't know I was in a threesome! He was a terrible communicator in general. When talking to his friends or an audience, he would be charming, but when talking to my friends or meeting my family, he was incredibly awkward. It wouldn't have bothered me as much if he were shy, but he was able to hold perfect conversations with complete strangers. On top of all this, I witnessed him lying to other people's faces, including his friends and family. Because of this, I knew for sure that he could not be trusted. Around the three-month mark, we exchanged "I love you's" and around that time, the little affection he was showing me was slowly wearing down. He never complimented me much anyway (except when we were making out), but those just stopped. Our time together was mainly spent making out once a week in his dorm even though I insisted that we should spend time talking and bonding in other ways. I guess he thought that because I was in love with him I was going to tolerate that. And I did for another two months before telling him that I'd been feeling neglected and that he wasn't keeping up his end of the compromise (He told me he'd be more open emotionally if I agreed to make out with him more). He told me it was hard and that that was the way he'd always been. No effort. No anything. He was the first person I'd done ANYTHING physical with and that was hard for me, but I was willing to try and compromise. He didn't try at all. During month six, I dumped him while we were on a walk. He was shocked. I did cry the weekend afterward, but I quickly realized how much happier I was without him in my life. I couldn't believe how being involved with him could make me feel so lonely and depressed. I've been single for a month now and while it sucks sometimes, I know I'm mentally in a better place now. I learned that it's better to be alone than with the wrong person.