Tags: depression, self-esteem
I had this friend that was going through some stuff just like I was. Both him and I were very depressed and so we started talking with one another. One thing after another, we ended up dating.
He lived in another city, so we couldn't see each other much but we talked/emailed each other nonstop everyday. We both thought things were pretty serious. On our official first date, he told me that he loved me and we had our very first kiss. And of course, this is lame but I had felt something when he kissed me. The very next day, he told me on the phone that we had to breakup. His mother told him to not date me for my good. She was afraid that he'd hurt me. I was really torn and depressed but we continued being friends but "with benefits." So it basically still felt like we were still dating. We'd still talk on the phone whenever we could and he'd always tell me that he loves me and other romantic things.
........But then I find out ONLINE that he started going out with this girl WHILE he was still talking with me and saying all that sweet stuff. And to add to it, I found out two WEEKS after they were dating. I was so pissed off and torn that I yelled at him to never talk to me. AND he had the nerve to say that he'd breakup with her if I wanted him to. I didn't want to hurt the other girl and so I told him to do whatever he wanted. He broke up with her and I added her as a friend on ----------. She blabbed out everything to me and said that they were true loves and etc. Then she had the nerve to say that he never liked me in the first place and that he was just thinking that he had feelings for me but in reality, he was madly in love with her.
Things got worse when I wanted to get the truth from him but I couldn't get into contact with him at all. But luckily, I was best friends with his sister and she told me about some things that he told her when he was dating me. He didn't feel anything when we kissed and he felt like he was pressured into saying that he loves me. She did me a favor and did a 3-way phone call and I listened into their conversation. I know it was wrong to do so but it cleared everything up. I heard him say that I reminded him of her ex from 3 years ago and so thats why he dated me. I became depressed and sad from that point on.
There were moments where I thought to myself that I should hate him for everything but I couldn't bring myself to do that. I blamed myself for it. I blamed myself for not noticing that he cut the time we usually talk together down. I blamed myself and said to myself that I deserved it. Even now, I think how could a plain girl like me ever get a guy like him to like me....I eventually gave up and now I don't enjoy everyday life and feel like I have to drag myself to make it through the day...
Tags: tragedy
So there was this guy that I met at 15 when I moved to my new school. He was 16 and I remember when we first met, I felt electricity and I couldn't take my eyes off him...how cheesy is that? Ever since then we've never been able to completely be away from each other and for a while he was all I had. We've never been officially a couple due to a few problems. One, we fight like cats and dogs. In the beginning I held back and whenever he would say hurtful things I would try to avoid him but then he would just get mad and say that I was running away. That didn't last because eventually I got tired of taking his shit, and that's when the fights really started picking up. He lies, he tries to make things seem as if they're my fault, and frankly he is the biggest asshole I've ever met.
Here's where it gets even crazier we would stop talking for a month after the fights and then he would come back and we would start it up all over again. As we got older though, there were a few things that were brought to my attention. Any time I made a new friend at school, if he knew them, he would tell me not to be friends with them. Turns out, he has tried to sabotage 90% of the friendships I made, as if he was trying to keep me isolated. If I had even thought about dating another guy, he would get pissed but if he dated someone else then I'm bitter. I even remember on one of his drunken nights, he called me and told me that as much as he hated me, he wanted to be with me.
I knew that a lot of our pent up frustration was partially due to the fact that we didn't have sex. So, in the year that I turned 18 we had sex. It was pretty amazing and it actually helped. But of course, it didn't last..Skipping on threw, I went to college and he doesn't go to college so we stopped speaking b/c of another girl and when she broke up with him, he came to me. Btw that's what he does, whenever a girl hurts him, he finds me. So he started talking to me more, and he gained my trust again and when I went home for spring break we met on a car port surrounded by buildings, beautiful and romantic lol. And summer came around and we were having frustration fussing so we had sex. That's when everything became functional, until he got worried that I was pregnant. We don't use condoms and I'm not on the pill, DUMB. Thank god, I wasn't pregnant and so I went back to school. We kept in touch regularly until october and I hadn't heard from him until this morning. We had a small fight and he said that he misses me but I need to grow up and that we could talk when I learn how! Rude much, so I called him a dumb unnecessary bitch and blocked him. I'm not dumb, I go home in two weeks, so he's trying to fix his shit before i come home. So I know he'll contact me. that's pretty much why I blocked him so he'll have no choice but to text or call me. In the beginning this chaos was fun, but now that I'm older I just want stability. This was the first real fight we've had in a year so things have been getting better. But I just can't get passed that he hasn't even tried to talk to me for more than a month. I love him so much it hurts. I've loved him even before he took my virginity. He truly is the man I want to be with for the rest of my life. But people in hell want ice water. He can't let me go, and I can't let him go either. He has a few issues. He's had a pretty rough life, and I'm the only girl who has stayed and that scares him. Guys I've spoked to about this have told me, that I'm the one who could truly destroy him. He himself has told me that I have more power over him than I realize. Even when we have sex, it's not mindless fucking, it's quite emotional and he's the one that wants to be gentle with me while I want to get a little wild lol. He wanted me to stay in atlanta for school, and frankly I think that's what I should have done. There is another guy and there is another girl but unfortunately they're now part of a list of people that are for the purpose of taking our minds off of the other. They've been caught up in the tragedy of me and dylan. I just hope we learn to really love each other before we destroy each other.
Tags: boarding school
My boyfriend of a year and a half broke up with me. He claimed it was because I was leaving for Boarding school, and nothing else went through my mind so I bought it for a while. Until recently, away at school, I learned near the last few months of our relationship he was telling this girl that we had broken up. Throughout this time frame, he began to hook up and have sex with her. After figuring this out I gave him a phone call. He begged me to forgive him and told me he loved me. Yeah, that's right. Fuck you, Josh.
Tags: 2.5years
Me a 24 year old male her a 20 year old girl.
We met one spring day in a park, she asked my group of friends for a pape and things started then ( before you discard us a stoners read on) after about a month of meetings and lunches she made out with me one day before i left for the army. during my year of service my weekend leaves would full of passion, after 1 year of military service we started finally seeing each other much more regularly and shared a beautiful love story for 2 and a half years. during this time she evolved stopped smoking and started dressing really good. me..well i was just me, ill admit I gently started taking her for granted and that was my first mistake.
anyway i now feel betrayed as it is one of my most profound morals is loyalty and loyal i was to the bone,
she ends up making out with another guy and im sitting here broken. i feel back stabbed not only for the cheating issue but especially cus i was there for her to set her back up on her feet during her fuck ups, got her off smoking and into studying for her future, and when i need help to set my life in order she ran off. this is probably the only rational fuel i can use to tell myself she was not right for me, but i cant get her out of my head. its been 2 weeks now sicne the break up things are slowly getting better but still far from the end of the suffering.
A part of me wants her back and yet i know its not the right thing to do.
anyway, for all of you in the same situation iv found a little comfort in thinking about how much worse a break up must be in terms of a divorce where you lose your kids and stuff aswell. all in all its not so bad.
Tags: good ridance
We dated for a year and a half on and off for our own multiple reasons. He'd break up with me and come back, today was our 5th...not first..not second. 5TH time we've broken up, he went to a camp over the weekend met someone and is now ignoring me. I've IM'd him for the last time saying "fuck you. karma's a bitch & I hope she breaks your heart" & blocked him. I gave him all my love, he told me I made him feel ontop of the world, I always tried my best with him. May it be fights, his problems..anything. But I guess he never loved me at all, probably faked the whole relationship. This is the last time I'll ever shed tears for him, that jerk.
Tags: first love??
Iam 20 years old. Ive been a player living the single life since I got out of hi skool. 2 months ago i met a girl at a telly and we hooked up that same nyt. At first we started as frends with benefits but we both got attached and fell in love! Or so I thought. We had broken up once before because of something really bad that she did (not cheating) but bad. I missed her so much and we worked it out and got back together. After a few weeks i started realizing things were getting bad again and the relationship was going no where again and she loved to fight and argue but not take blaim for anything. Then one day we got over a silly arguement over the fone and she texted me saying its over! All that supposed love and she ended it over a stupid arguement. Then she also had a guy call me threatning me. This girl was my first love and it was all a joke and game to her. When it started off the other way around that she kept pressuring me to be with her and i did not want 2. Now i cant get her off my mind. but if i call her or text her back I lose!
I started dating this guy right before he left for Marine Corps bootcamp. We wrote letters back and forth, and when he got home it was absolute bliss, we were both in love. So he finishes his training, during which he flies me out to NC from CA just to see me for 3 days. He tells me about his most recent ex, and old friend of mine whom I hadn't seen for years, who he broke up with because she was addicted to heroin. So sad, he just wanted to let me know she called him from rehab, apologizing for making him dump her because she chose the drugs over him. Just so you know...
Fast forward several weeks, he's back home, were still in love, he wants me to move to SD with him, but Im going to school in SC so it couldnt work out. But I spend the weekend with him, roll out of bed on Monday to go to class, we each say I love you...
...Apparently they got married while I was at school.
...While we were still dating.
...Before he broke up with me over a text message.
...And his MOM told me.
Ya. A motherfucking Marine. Thats honor, courage and commitment if I ever saw it.
Tags: Phone Break-Up, Pregnant... Not
Ok, so basically I spent the better part of 2 years with this girl that was REALLY hard to get because we were really only dating for 4 1/2 months of that time span... So anyways it started out great, then the sex was gradually added on... But she has an extreme anxiety disorder about a lot of things, one of which include dating (don't as me why, everyone says she's a nutjob for having this)... So she was having all of this attack and stuff because she was late... Now I do not know what she's she scared about, I NEVER came inside... In fact she wasn't even that good in bed so there really shouldn't have been this problem... But no, she starts isolating herself and making me really frustrated because I wanted to badly see her (I was on a co-op placement, so I was away from school for 4 days a week) but she wouldn't allow me... So then she had her period, and I thought everything would be back to normal but then she suddenly said that she didn't feel the same anymore, blah blah blah and broke up with me over the phone... I was shocked so I tried other ways to contact her but I was blocked, so I did some more drastic things and her sister stepped in and everything became a huge mess... Now I really resent her for everything she put me through and for not giving me closure, and it looks like Karma already did its job because she lost ALL of her friends after hearing what she did to me
Tags: sad, depressing
My boyfriend (now ex) started dating in my first year of highschool. It was one of those highschool relationships that you see on the movies, and who every teenage girl hopes to have. We were together all through out highschool. He was so in love with me. Honestly, Im pretty sure I could of gotten away with anything and he would always come back to me. A lot of it had to do with the fact that we were eachothers first time and lust/love was being thrown around together. But at the end of the day we really did love eachother and we had something that some people will never ever experience. We were best friends. We knew every single thing about eachother. It was a relationship where I could take a crap infront of him and that wasnt a problem at all! haha! at one point he even moved away for half a year and still we some how made it work. But then, oh i forgot to mention he is a year older than me! anyways, he started university and I was in my last year of highschool. Thats when everything changed. We had always had our problems. his was honesty issues, mine where anger issues. But once he moved on, it was like we were completley different people! I know... if any of you are reading this you are probably thinking my story is pretty boring. he never cheated on me with my sister, or i never left him at the alter. We were just two regular people who were at one moment so in love... to not even knowing who eachother were. I guess im writing this because im so depressed and bitter with the reality of relationships and life in General. We ended up breaking up because our lives and our relationships became so routine. We new that we loved eachother but we were stuck making time to see eachother to make love with one another, to make sure we set enough time to have a phone conversation once a day, made sure we sent eachother at least 10 txts a day to make sure our days were going alright. It was horrible and I was unhappy, and because I was unhappy we fought... all the time. So those "dates" turned into a boxing ring. So eventually I had to end it. that was about around last christmas. I didnt blame him, nor did I blame myself. I blamed our situation. He was in Univserity and leading a completley different life than me, I was enjoying my last year of highschool. But since we broke up, I have had a few flings, slepted with a random, tried to pretend that those guys could at some point mean something to me, but at the end of the day, it was always him, and I feel as if it will ALWAYS be him. But again, it hurts me so much to see how things change... it wasnt supposed to turn out this way. I am now moving to Europe in a few weeks for a year, he has a new girlfriend( who is horrible) and we went from being so happy and to not being able imagine our selves without eachother, to leading completley different lives without eachother in them. Am I still in love with him- Yes. most definatley... if he magicaly asked me to be with him again would i say yes-No. Definatly not. I wish i could of met him in 5 years.. thats what i always told him. I wish we met in a different life where we could be with eachother and love eachother completley without having such barriers set up between us, masking the love we had for eachother. I cry at night, i miss him every night. I dont want to leave without him touching me, kissing me, looking me in te eyes one last time. But i know thats not possible. i want him to be able to move on, all i want is for him to be happy. He deserves it.
Today is my 16th birthday. I'm five months pregnant; my boyfriend (well, ex now) and I had been going out for nearly a year. I loved him very much. We did everything together, even well into the pregnancy. He said we'd always be together, etc. He went out of town and I didn't see him for two weeks, during which time he didn't contact me at all. When he got back, he was frustrating and distant. But yesterday, he came over and said he wanted to take a step back because he was overwhelmed with how I've become a different person (of course I have; I'm pregnant and the stress he's putting on me is only making it worse). We compromised by agreeing to still hang out once or twice a week, not see anybody else, and let our relationship rebuild itself naturally. But he agreed to take me out to dinner and a movie today, since it's my birthday. It would be kind of like a first date all over again. And I was OK with that. I waited all day for him. When he was hours late, I finally texted him. Over a text message, he told me he was busy with some other girl and that we shouldn't see each other anymore. The baby will be born in a few months, at which point she'll go to live with adoptive parents. And I thought THAT on its own would be painful enough....
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