I haven’t had much experience with serious relationships but this is one of the hardest things I've done. I would really appreciate some feedback from outside sources since I'm a popular guy but few people to go to in this city and certainly no shoulder to cry on.
Last night I broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years; a girl I admire and daresay love (in many ways), who upon graduating, fought her hateful parents and moved to the city where I studied to complete my late ass degree. Free rent to help pay her loans and good job opportunities out of the question, she moved here to work to survive just to live with me.
We’re both 22 now, and we have known each other for a little over 2 years. Because of her anxiousness to date and my cautiousness it took us about 6 months to go from friends to official.
Moving in after a year was scary enough but done so that we could stay together. This loving girl knew she wanted me forever from the first few months. I was new to the whole relationship scene, and rather unsure. Naturally the thought that she was scared the crap out of me.
But we moved in, and as expected there were some rough nights. We were far from perfect, and her dependence on me paired with her inherent need to ‘have the final say’ on everyday issues tested my rationality regularly. In spite of a few terrible nights where we swore we were done, the year as roommates ended far better than expected. We had learned a lot about living with one another and grown our love. This was mostly because she did everything possible to be the perfect girl, she: is caring, generous, and sweet beyond belief, cooks fantastic meals, adopts new styles, and always promoted a good sex life. Still I felt unhappy – for a reason that was not immediately clear. I loved her, but I also restrained my interests for her sake at times. I feel that this is normal, but I also feel young and that there is much I want to do before I make the necessary sacrifices that come with commitment. In short - I felt that everything was moving too fast.
She never stopped pressuring me into the thing she wanted most from me - a promise. This was something that I couldn't give until I felt ready. She plans to have the security of an engagement ring within the next couple of years, and reminds me of that regularly. I love her, but this is my life too!
With what looks like 2 or 3 years before a real career begins for me, being ready to propose seems half a decade away. I tell her I want to enjoy the relationship we have and continue to work on it and grow together. When I talk to her about the pressure her sacrifices put on me she says she wants someone to match the love –and commitments- that she shows. Unfortunately I can't do that, and although I love her, I have to let her go.
Our timing was cruelly wrong, and I think it is finally time to stop ignoring that fact and use the time to explore myself and my desires. She could be the one, but that’s just not something I can decide yet.
Tags: exbf, manipulator, liar, selfish
My ex boyfriend and I broke up about 2 and a half years ago, but all this time we never stopped talking. We remained in a sexual relationship all this time. During this time he treated me poorly, then we would fight and then he would treat me better... until the next fight. He always knew what to say and how to act to calm me down and convince that he cared for me. During this time he talked to 3 other girls, and in all the occasions I told him I didn't want to talk to him anymore, but he would insist in staying in my life. We had a bad fight in all three occasions and then once things started not working out with the girl he would apologize saying he recognized he didn't treat me well. I have asked him several times to stay away, to let me go, and he would for a couple of weeks but then he would come back and I was enough of an idiot to let him back in. Well in December I told him we should stop seeing each other, then he said "ok" but soon started messaging me saying he wanted to see me once I got home from Christmas break. Then we hung out a couple of times in January, but then he started being really rude to me so I told him to not talk to me anymore. We hadn't talked to me in a while and then I (was being stupid again) texted him saying I was ok with us not talking but I wanted to understand why. Then he replied "get over me, i'm talking to a girl in high school" (detail: we are both 22 and college students). I laughed because that's just pathetic. Well the next week I saw him at a dance at our college, and I was a little tipsy and in a bad mood and angry at him so I walked by him and pumped into him. He texted me all angry, but then the next morning he was being all sweet saying I look beautiful at the dance and that he wanted to see me. So I said "what about your high schooler?" then he replied "Oh I lied, I just said that to piss you off". I knew he was lying about that, I know he actually talked to her and I knew she had probably dumped him already. Well,I didn't let him come over to my apartment. I didn't want to see him at all. Then I realized on his twitter that he was talking to her again so I asked him "why did you lie about not talking to her?" then he answered "i don't have to explain anything to you" (wow, dick). Well after that we talked a couple more times and then I noticed there was nothing wrong because of some things he posted on twitter. Then we were talking and he said someone screwed things up. Well it was obviously her. Then a few days later I drove by his house (which is right across from my apartment) and I saw a car there, so I asked if it was hers and he said yes. Well I got pissed out and said terrible things to him. We argued bad, I told him he was nothing to me, and I regretted having let him in back in my life so many times, he got really mad when I said that and then he told me he didn't want to talk to me anymore. Then the next day we argued again and this time he told me "shut up, don't talk to me, don't talk about me, and don't talk about her". I know I screwed up in a few aspects, but in no way I'm blaming myself for what did. He lied to me several times, and he manipulated me to get just what he wanted. He is the most selfish and egocentric person I have ever met. All he thinks is about himself. Now that he is happy with her there is no way in hell that he will apologize for the mean things he said to me. What I heard is that she is a little high school slut, so I guess she is a good fit for him. I know I deserved some of it, but he was never considering towards my feelings. We were still kinda up in the air, and he knew I had feelings for him, and he didn't understand when I tried to explain why I was mad/upset. He pretty much said "this is your problem, not mine, deal with it". This last couple of weeks have been tough, but I will not let him bring me down. I am starting to see that I didn't lose anything, I actually won, because I got rid of an abusive, manipulative boy and now I am free to find a man, who can care for me and be what my ex could never be.
Tags: Love Betrayal
This is almost a two year long story. I have a short 25 minute video that will be attached to this video. I met a girl that I was there for right off the bat when her mom was having more time f***ing this guy than taking care of her daughter. She moved in with in with me, but soon I would learn the truth to her. She was abusive, and didn't do anything. She had very bad hygiene problems that would lead to her yeast infection and multiple UTI's. She watched pedophile porn which made me absolutely sick. The girl walked out on me when I needed her, and we would eventually break up. She would play mind games with me back and forth for a while. Then in the end she finally told me that I was just a comforter, that I never mattered, and to go kill myself. Sadly I'm cursed with this feeling because she was my first everything. The video below will give a better insight.
Tags: 6
Well me and this one guy named Connor starterted going out on Janury 16 2013. We hit things off. Everything was great.Then out of the blue he asks another girl out. With me standing right next to him. Well, it didn't last long. On February 4 2013 I broke up with him because I found out he was cheating on me with 4 other girls. He called me that night asking what is going on. I broke up with him officially. He balled for 2 freakin' weeks. But he was my first boyfriend. Any guess what the next day I was walking down the hall and he starts making out with my best friend to make me jealous. When my friend found out I broke up with him( she knew I still had feelings for him) she asks him out. Now he wants to know my crush. And he expects us to be friends. Oh did I mention he beated me.
Tags: break up
Hey guys :) i've read some of your stories and i guess mine isn't as tragic but it still hurts... It all started the day after a friend's party me and 3 guys were kicked out of the house at about 8 in the morning and we decided we were hungry. So we went to Dunkin'Donuts. There we started talking and i realized how much in common we had with K[my ex]. After that we hadn't paid much attention to eachother but we started chatting on facebook. We got closser and closser with every single day we always chatted and when we weren't near a computer we texted. So on march 28th 2012 we started dating ^^ Everything was perfect we were always together we had mutual friends and everything was perfect... i was so HAPPY :)... i even gave my virginity to him ... But then things got bad... we started seeing eachother less and less... he stopped calling me or whatever... if i didn't write to him or call him he never would... he prefered to go to his pottheaded friends then be with me :). So the first time i hadn't heard from him for a week i told him that i want attention i know he's been on the computer i've seen his facebook posts FOR GODS SAKE! And he just looked with those puppy eyes said he was sorry and everything was right again :)... but no.. it happened again... and again... On the third time i asked him how would he feel in my place? What would he do? Did he know that i felt like i was there just so if someone asked him if he had a girlfriend he'd say yes? He just stayed silent... After that day ended i went home and i was expecting atleast a phonecall from him to bring me back.... Nope! Not even a message... So i wrote: after everything we've been trough i didn't even get one message... he called me. The same thing happened i talked he stayed silent... we said we'd meet... We did the samme thing and after the hundret time of me asking him what should i do and how does he think i feel he said i hope we stay friends.... The sad thing is 4 months after the break up i already have a new boyfriend that does EVERYTHING for me and treats me like a princess and i still can't get HIM out of my mind... and what hurts even more is that he doesn't give crap about me :) So i'm forced to see him everyday at school and act happy and fake...
Tags: First Girlfriend, Betrayel
Hello everyone. My name is Keller Connley, and this is the story of how my first girlfriend broke my heart. It was freshman year, and the homecoming was coming up. I was very desperate and asked a lot of girls to come with me, but they all said no. Finally, I asked this girl who I had only seen a few times during school, and she was in my math class. So, a week before homecoming, I asked her, and she said, "I'll, think about it." The next day, she told me yes I will go with you and gave me her number. Later that night, when we were texting, she told me that she had a boyfriend. I was shocked, since I would have never asked her if I had known. She said to not worry, because she wanted to break up with her anyway. So she did that, and a few days later we were going out. Homecoming was extremely fun and I had a great time with her.
So, during our time together, we did things, like go to the movies and hung out at my dads place. We didn't go all the way, since we were in ninth grade and both Christians. The furthest I went was halfway between 2nd and 3rd base.
We did this for eight months, but I started to realize that there were cracks in the relationship. We stopped spending every second of school outside of class together, and we also didn't text as much as before, since I had broken my phone.
The straw that broke the camels back, however, was in fact my best friend for 3 years. He got jealous, and somehow convinced me she was cheating on me, and convinced me to give him her number. That was on Sunday May 6th 2012. She confronted me the next day, and started asking me weird questions. Apparantly, my friend had told her lies, such as that I watched gay porn, and that I had my eyes on this black girl in school. I dismissed these lies, and life was normal again. However, on May 12th and 13th, when we talked over the phone, she told me that she had feelings for my friend. On May 14th, when school started, she broke up with me, and shattered my heart. I later found out that she had asked out my friend no more than 19 minutes later. My birthday was that Saturday.
For the following 2 weeks, I broke down in tears many times, both in and out of class. She in my opinion is being controlled by him because he has threatened me with violence, and the few times I have been able to speak to my ex, she tells me, " I shouldn't be talking to you. Randy is very jealous, and I don't want him to hurt you."
Now, since it's been almost a year, I am going to try and talk to her again. What do you guys and gals think I should do?
Tags: breakup, mistake, regret
Where to begin? I guess I should start with when we met. It was April 9th, 2012; the day we got back from a trip for marching band. I was talking to my friend Melanie and she said, "you should try to talk to new guys. You never know, something good might come out of it." I said, "who should I talk to though and how?" That's when she suggested I talk to the guy who would eventually be the best boyfriend I've ever had: Brandon. So, when I got home, I message him on Facebook because I had nothing better to do and I thought if I went up to him in person and talked to him that it would be weird. I doubted that he even knew who I was (I was wrong about that. Turns out our friend Nick had told him that he should date me when I was a freshman. I'm now a junior and he was a sophomore at the time. We're in high school). So, we hit it off and everything seemed great. But as months passed I was wondering why he never asked me out. He told me he wanted to get to know me better first. So then the summer went by and we didn't talk much. Then in August 2012, we had band camp and we started talking again. He asked me if I wanted to sit with him on the bus on the way to competitions. I said yes. The bus rides were always fun and he was a really big flirt. Once again, I began to wonder why he wasn't asking me out, but this time I didn't bring it up. Then on November 6th, 2012, we hung out and he asked me out. The way he did it was really corny, but it was cute. I was so happy. Then, 2 weeks later he told me that he didn't want me hugging other guys, because he wanted it to be an exclusive part of our relationship. I thought this was dumb, but I just said okay because I didn't want to start anything. This were going fine and then two weeks later, he told me to switch lockers and move into his (I was previously sharing one with my best friend, Louis). I think he was just jealous or insecure. Maybe both. I was his first girlfriend, so maybe he was just scared he'd lose me or something. So, that weekend he's over my house. We've made out before but we had never used tongue and we tried it but I didn't like it. He got frustrated and said that "it's a way to kiss. How can you not like it?" I said I didn't know. Then over the next two weeks it seemed like everyday he said he was getting frustrated with me. I was getting upset and depressed because I felt like I was letting an not being a good enough girlfriend. So, eventually I decided to break up with him on December 14th, 2012, because I just wasn't happy anymore. I did it over the phone because the only other time I would have been able to do it was at school or at my house and that would have been awkward. So I was on the phone with him and I did it. I broke up with him. He didn't say anything and I started to cry. I felt really bad and him not saying anything made me feel worse. Then five minutes later he said "Can we still be friends?" I said "yes" he said "okay. Bye." And hung up. I kept crying for a good 3 hours. He called me like 2 hours later but I was asleep. He left a voicemail saying that he hopes that I don't think he's mad at me and that he wishes things could have worked out but he's glad we can still be friends. I was happy about that. But as the weeks passed it seemed like he wanted the opposite. Now, he rarely talks to me and I feel like when he does, I annoy him. I miss him so much and it's ridiculous. I want him back, but I know he'll never want me again. I at least want to be friends again. I asked him to my junior prom, so maybe that will help, but we'll have to wait and see. Is there anything else I can do? I think I might be in love with Brandon and knowing that I screwed things up just hurts so much. I want to fix it. Breaking up with him was probably the biggest mistake in my life and I regret it so much.
Okay soooo......it was like July, last summer and i went to my aunt's for two weeks. When i was there i met this good looking guy and we started talking after i saw him at a bball game. He asked for my number and you already know i wasn't missing that opportunity!After i left we started talkin ALOT(from 9 in the morning till like maybe 2 or 3 a.m. the next day). Well in the beginning of September (on my bday) he FINALLY asked me out.
To me, he was the sweetest kid ever with smarts and a bball career on his hands (he was invited to a NIKE camp only for the top..100 players in the state i think?)Then school started up again and he was tellin me how all these different girls were tryin to flirt with him (remember this was a long distance relationship) and stuff. And my dumb self believein him smh.
Well a few months down the road that fool starts talkin about this friend of his, whos a girl, of course i think nothin of it. Then he broke up with me the weekend after Thanksgiving, for her..and im like WOW! did i really not see these signs that were RIGHT under my nose.
He'd talk about that girl all the time..but thats not the worst part. HE EXPECTED US TO STILL BE FRIENDS....come on now you've gotta be kidding! Plus the whole time i was with him he was lyin. He told me he was in honor classes..his report card said ffffff so obviously not! And he also was talkin about how he was 'sooo kool' and crap...doubt it considering he had like 50 followers on twitter...I just think u shouldnt have to lie about yourself to boost your ego...u definitely turn out looking even more stupid wen everyone finds out the truth.
Tags: The other woman
Okay so I meet this guy at this party I was at. We started to hit things off great. Our relationship lasted for a good two and a half weeks, that's when "N" decided that it was time to call things off, I was fine with his decisions because I wasn't emotionally attached to him yet. I started to wonder why he had broken up with me because things seemed to be going great. I started to chat up with some of my friends about possible reasons why he had ended it, and in this situation having a extremely noisy best-friend, she was about to dig up details from friends of mutual friends. Apparently while we were dating he was seeing this other woman. I didn't let the situation bother me. A couple weeks past and me and my brother went shopping for my mothers birthday present, that's when I saw "N" there with what I think was the other woman. I decided to confront her too tell her that if he cheated on me, he would possibly cheat on her. After telling her that she is better off without him, she called me a fat ugly whore. That's when my time bomb ticked and I screamed at her that she was the other woman that ruin our relationship. Turns out they had been dating for two years, and I was indeed that other woman who had made their relationship unstable. I died of complete shame, to make things worse she and "N" were ganging up on me with very nasty words, so my brother which neither of them had ever met, had to come to my rescue by punching "N" and had to pretend to be my so call "New Boyfriend" so I had some sort of dignity left letting them and the other twenty passer byers think that I wasn't some crazy girl who was still waiting for "N" to take me back. Not only had I caused a scene that day, my brother had to pretend to be boyfriend ( Awkward and GROSS!)
Tags: Mat
I always knew my relationship with my jackass ex boyfriend Matthew would not work out... He was always an asshole yet I stupidly fell for him anyway.
So we went out one day and he told me that he wanted to break up with me because 'he couldn't love me as much as I loved him'. Fair enough I said ok and we parted ways.
Next day I meet up with my male best friend and tell him what happened and things got a bit intimate (always had a soft spot for him). One week later I'm out with my best friend and we're holding hands when I see the ex! And guess what, he had a new girlfriend! So he was cheating on me throughout the 1 year relationship.
I grabbed my best friend and made out with him in front of Matthew. It was so worth it. When I went home Matt deleted me off facebook and I couldn't give a flying fuck about him. Matthew walks past me at Uni and acts as if I don't exist. Last week I was on the bus and Mat's girlfriend was sitting in front of me. I made it a point that she knows who I am and wished her the best of luck with her boyfriend.
Its not her fault she's with a jackass. I wish I could warn her what sort of a person he is. Once a cheater always a cheater.
I'm not in a relationship with my best friend, but I still make out with him when I see Mat :)
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