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Drew H

January 18, 2013 @ (Indiana)

Man where to begin. I'm now 23. Dated my ex (EK) for a little over 2 years. We went to college together and spent 95% of nights together. She graduates and gets a job 2.5 hours away, but we were solid. We told each other we loved the other and consistently talked about living together after I graduated.

We see each other about 2/3 of weekends and still go strong. Then one day when I go to visit here, out of nowhere, she sits me down and tells me she doesn't think it is going to work out. I'm heartbroken, but am able to calm down and talk it through. she admits to not seeing the whole story and changes her mind relatively quickly and we have a good weekend together.

A few days later, she messages me and expresses how depressed she is. I try to calm her down, but she loses it and says she isn't going to talk to me until after thanksgiving (1 week). When we do talk, she says she wants to discuss all our issues. I agree to meet on my way back to school.

We talk. It wasn't the most pleasant, but we salvage the weekend and have a good 1.5 days together. Then on Wednesday, after a bad day of work, she says she can't do it and says she gonna breakup with me in person at my apartment. I dont wait around. I buy flowers and chocolate and surprise her at her apartment. We talk that night and have a plan to spend a weekend at my school together. I spend the night.

We wake up at 6:30 am (she has to work) and she breaks up with me. I am forced to drive 2.5 hours and go straight class after losing the girl I was in love with.

I do the right thing and leave her alone for a month. No birthday text or any contact from her in December. I call in Jan to initiate a conversation. No response. I try again a few days later. No response. She sends me a FB message saying to stop contacting her. Before I read this, I am meeting with a different ex (KD) for advice. I go to the bathroom during lunch with KD and she takes my phone and grabs EKs phone number and starts texting her. It is not until later that I find out about this after EK accusses KD of actually being me (aka me having 2 phone numbers) and threatens to call the police if i show up at her door.

I send her a FB explaining the deal and telling her how inappropriate she is behaving. She doesn't respond. I randomly run into her the next weekend on campus and she is a wreck and acts incredibly miserable, even though she is dating a guy she became "friends" with right before we broke up.

I will likely never know the truth because she has not answered anything I have texted her. All I have been told is that she was unhappy for a long time and led me on for about 6 months. I have taken the higher road, but it's tough not knowing what went wrong with the girl I loved.

Jacob D

January 14, 2013 @ (Ohio)

Tags: Games

Okay so im 14 i like this girl on a videogame Xbox360 to be exact her name on there is m*** and she at the time was 14 and i was 13 so i meet her beacause of my friend and im in chat with her and a bunch of dudes and of course everyone wants her, im jealos bla bla bla and i keep being sweet to her, my friends are like omg your so hot and the gentleman i am say wow, you are the most beautiful girl i've ever seen. She freaks out and says you guys but g*** (thats me lol) are pervs she leaves chat and my friends are hating on me. She wants me to join chat and I do she says she thinks im funny. And of course im just like , oh, Stop it you lol.Anyway i spend a week talking to her and my game system breaks and i start to think omg its the end of the world i get a new one 3 months later i send her a friend request she accepts and im just like doing a victory dance and the the next day i send her a message and i say good morning beautiful, no reply so i say how is your day going the a random dude says to quit messaging so im like who are you her boyfriend and he says actually i am and i just flip im so pis#ed off i send her a message i called her a bit#h and i regret it to this day i think of her all of this time she blocked me so i cant say im sorry for calling her a bit@h. Tell me what to do! i miss her !

Nan El

January 01, 2013 @ (New York)

Tags: Cheating with co-worker, 3 years of lies

Over three years ago I started dating a man that was selfish, a cheater, a liar and just plain self centered. He admitted this to me. I was hesitant at first but it didn't take long for him to have me believing that he wanted to be a better man for me. We worked together for years and once he transferred to another department, that's when we started dating. He asked me to marry him after just a few months and treated me as if I was the only woman on earth. We spent constant time together and he would look me in the eyes everyday and tell me how much he loves and adores me and wants to be with only me the rest of his life. I introduced him to my kids and he moved in with us shortly thereafter. He lived with us for one year and during that time he started drifting, working more...going out longer with his friends. He started telling me he was having a hard time living with kids (who I only have half the week) and he only saw them maybe twice a week. He told me he couldn't live with us anymore and it just wasn't "him". The day after he moved out he was begging for me back and this went on and off for a year and a half. We broke up last December of 2011 because he couldn't handle things...all while still claiming to love me and not want anyone else. For about 6 weeks we went back and forth about our love for each other then he said he needs me and promises to be the man II need. I took him back and we were together up until October of this past year 2012....still back and forth with his feelings...but kept promising to marry me and move back in. I broke up with him in October when he told me he couldn't take vacation to Disney World with me and the kids which was planned and paid for and was happening in 3 weeks!! He continued to text and call me crying that he needs me, etc... But his gram was sick and he didn't want to go anywhere. He made me feel guilty for taking vacation without him! When I returned right after Thanksgiving, I started finding out some things from people and emails, etc.. He started sleeping with one of my employees last year when we broke up...she works very closely with me. They broke up when he got back together with me...but then he contacted her to "get together" in April, May and November. We went to a concert together in June and they acted like they didn't even know each other then went to get beer for 20 minutes together! At that point I had no reason to think anything of it. Once I confronted both of them, they denied even knowing each other and called me crazy. She ultimately confessed but they are both still claiming it wasn't all year long. She has had boyfriends this whole time as well. I am now in a situation where they both still work for the company and she still reports to me. They act as if nothing is wrong and life is good....they show no remorse. By the way, she is 12 years younger than him! I have so much pain and it is in my face everyday. How do I get over it?

Liz

December 24, 2012 @ (Lost)

Tags: emotional, regret

so back in october I started talking to this guy (he's 18 and so am I), at first we weren't fond of each other because of a certain situation but slowly we started talking on good terms, I got to know him and he took the time to get to know me, we hung out a few times and I started developing feelings or a crush towards him. soon after on november 1st 2012 we started dating officially, we would see each other every day and sometimes he would come over out of the blue unexpectedly. I found these gestures sweet at a point and we would constantly spend time together. Myself, I really don't have many friends and I have a real fear of trusting people because of my past but I let that go with him. I was head over heels up until now when I slipped into a depression. I got sick with bronchitis and we couldn't see each other for a few days but he still wanted to see me although we could not kiss because of my sickness and he was pretty sick himself. I started having doubts in the back of my head was this what I really wanted. He treated me so well like a princess, we had our little arguments yes but that never changed how I felt and we always had great communication with each other and he all around cared about me and never have I ever been treated that way by any guy and it sort of gave me hope that things were going to change for me for once. he always complimented me although I never felt beautiful and I was also having problems with my life ie. college, family problems but he was there to asure me he wasn't going anywhere which scared me even more. I started feeling as if when I kissed him I didn't feel right because he said he was slowly falling for me but I was trying hard to keep myself from falling for him seeing as the duration of the time we've been together. He makes me so happy, he brightens my day and since we've broken up these past few days I feel empty and regretful and just guilty. I feel as if I let something good go and I'm not sure if I'll ever find that again, but I had to let him go if I did not feel right at that time because I slowly started feeling depressed again. I felt as if I couldn't feel for him the way he wanted me to and it hurts because I hurt him and he did nothing wrong. Was is that he was clinging on too much that I started to feel this way? I'm so confused and lost, that I'm not sure if this was right or if it was. I'm scared I may have lost out on my forever.

Nikki

December 23, 2012 @ (Cambridge, MA)

Tags: Coward

T got depressed in October & wouldn't see me for six weeks. My father died Nov 6th. Nov 14th was my birthday. 1 1/2 weeks later, T disappeared without explanation, not answering my calls & messages. I was depressed after my father's death, I'm very insecure, and I'm used to the people I care about disappearing. Due to these factors, I interpreted T's absence as he didn't want to talk to me. After about 10 days, I finally sent T a text asking why he wasn't answering my messages, that he said he cared about me, & I missed our conversations. The next day, T answered that he'd been away without a phone signal. He said no one else was upset by his absence (no one else was used to daily contact with him!), and that he was uncomfortable that I'd assume something negative about him. I explained about my depression & insecurity. T said he understood, that he wasn't upset. He wrote a bit about his Thanksgiving, sent a joke, and then a smile when I joked in reply. I thought everything was OK. But then I didn't hear from T again. I wondered if T had gone away again. I was also worried~ I didn't know if he was dead or alive. After about a week, I went to T's place, and was shocked to find that he was at home. I suddenly realized that I'd been left for no reason, and that T didn't even tell me, had in fact led me to believe that everything was all right between us. I rang the bell. T wouldn't come down. I rang the bell for a while, and T called the police! Not only was T not man enough to come down and tell me what was going on, but he wouldn't even tell me that he didn't want to talk to me. T said that he had very strong feelings for me, that he loved me. He said we were friends, and our friendship was the most important thing. T had also told me that he'd never forget how I was there for him when his father died. He dumped me 2 1/2 weeks after my father's death! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXi2vHrT-kU&list=HL1356282746

Dislike Chandra

November 05, 2012 @ (Duluth, MN)

Tags: Break up story

When you told me you had found someone, I was worried. I thought there wasn’t possibly a way you cheated on me because I knew you. I trusted you. You weren’t that person. You said you hadn’t started dating her yet and that you were “just friends” but that you’d spent the night at her apartment on her couch a few times, that you’d gone out for drinks, etc. I digested this news. You had found someone else. I begged, I cried, I starved myself for several weeks – because I couldn’t understand how you, someone who I thought to be a good person, could have cheated on me.

I read her Facebook updates and it appeared that you had been dating since April, going on little vacation trips together, meeting her family, etc., all the while you were still dating me. You used my car to visit her, to bring her to work, and to take trips out in the country with her. When I was extremely ill, you claimed you were at a cabin with your parents and elderly grandmother, so I would have to take an ambulance. Turns out you were with her in the country, with my car.

You didn’t even come clean with me, I had asked for honesty. Please just tell me how long you’d been dating, what had gone on behind my back, etc. I felt made a fool of and humiliated. I was embarrassed that I defended you when you were “at a friends house” (turns out you were spending the night with her), or when you were hours late coming home from work, I figured you stopped to hang out with a friend – turns out I was completely over-trusting.

When I found out the truths splattered all over her Facebook, knowing that she had been married and her ex-husband had cheated on her and caused the end of the marriage less than a year before you two started dating, I was angry. How can another woman agree to date a man and put another lady in the same position she herself was in? She knew how this kind of betrayal hurt.

There was a time after the cheating when you made me feel like the cheating was entirely my fault and that if I tried to change some things about my behaviors and my income situation, you’d still date me. You claimed you wanted to be friends. You cried like a baby several times. You insisted that you didn’t hate me.

I moved out. We broke up. Things were spiraling out of control – and there you were being cruel to me any chance you got. I ran into you and your new “fiancé” (you got engaged after four months of dating, all of which were done when you were cheating on me, really), and instead of showing some respect for me being in the same vicinity as you two – you made out the entire night for hours on end in front of my friends and me! Talk about disrespectful.

You couldn’t understand what caused me to hate you. You couldn’t understand what caused me to hate her? You wanted me to play nicely and be kind. I’ve moved on with my life, I’ve met someone I can trust and depend on. We bonded over the horrible things you did to me, how low you were as a person, and we laugh at you. I’m glad we’re able to be together – but I’m still angry at you for NOT apologizing for the kinds of cruel things you did to me.

I’d be ashamed for your mother and father that they raised such a horrific human. You lied to your parents while you were cheating, you didn’t even invite them to your wedding – because you’ve changed. You’ve become the most evil person I’ve ever known, and it’s sad – because you use to be a good person.

I’d like to say I wish you health and happiness, but I wish almost every ill the world can throw at you. Every impossible situation where you’ll find pain, I wish that for you. I hope one day karma throws you several things at one time and you can feel what it feels like to not have a choice in a situation, to be made a fool of, and to hurt.

I know in my heart, you will cheat on her. Once she doesn’t pay enough attention to you. Once she gets too busy working and being a mother, she’ll forget to give you the insane amount of attention you require and you’ll do horrible things to her like you’ve done to me. The only difference is, she’ll deserve it.

I Miss Him

November 02, 2012 @ (OK)

Tags: break up sad death

His name was Joseph. We met & fell in love. He was really sweet and caring. We were only together for a month. He found out his ex was three months pregnant and with twins. So we broke up because of those responsibilities. We tried to get along. But I was really hurt and whenever he would call me I would ignore him. His ex would constantly threaten me telling me that I should stay away from them that I better not ruin her happiness. On my birthday, Joseph came to see me and we ended up arguing over his now fiancee. I cried a lot, it was the worst way to start my 23rd birthday. His babies were born and he still wanted me to be part of his life and asked for forgiveness for all the mean things he said. I forgave him but I told him that I didn't want to be part of his life and to please leave me alone then he told me I was a cold hearted immature girl. We said so many things to each other. I moved on, we lost contact. Then this past May we saw each other at a mutual friends party and he smiled at me and told me I looked beautiful. I looked away and he kissed me and said "I still think about you everyday" I pushed him away and slapped him and told him to never do that again and I left. He went after me and I told him to go away with his wife he said "i didn't marry her" I asked "why?" he said "I don't love her. It doesnt matter if I have kids with her I love them and you but not her" and I said "stop lying! Leave me alone!" & he said "is that what you really want" and I said "yes.." and he said "fine" and he left. Two days ago I receive a call from his mom telling me that he passed away in a car crash and I feel like shit because I wasn't able to tell him how I felt I was just really hurt.I wish I can see him again but it won't ever happen :"(

A Girl With A Broken Heart

October 28, 2012 @ (Lebanon)

Tags: exboyfriend, how to get

I was with this guy for about 10 months, we were in a long distance relationship. He works abroad. He comes twice a year to Lebanon. The second time i saw him in Lebanon he broke up with me for about one month and half i started begging him and telling how much i love him and than we started arguing so i started to ignore him than we came back together. He came so nice and good to me than he came back to the country he works in. We broke up for the second time and than came back after ignoring him, when he came back he refused putting our picture on BBM and so i told him why, he said you keep fighting me while he does all the fighting, and i have no word. So i was okay with it, like what can i do i cannot force him, but on whatsapp he kept our picture with my name as a nickname. ( on BBM also he kept my name). But 3 weeks ago we broke up i didn't know why, he was desperate changing pictures on BBM and he removed my name so i asked him why, like u removed our picture already and now my name, later on what? he was fighting me all over and broke up with me after being so good to him and trying to make him calm, he broke up and i called him several times he didn't reply so i wished him good luck and that he lost me because of his bad treatment. And he said u lost me before i lost you because u didn't care. so i ignored him. He started to put sad faces on BBM so i ignored him but after a few days i said that he lost me forever because he was so disrespectful and im not gonna stay like this forever and i think he has a new girlfriend so i said many things... and he started bringing up my old relations. MY PAST! and say that i didn't care and i m not a good girlfriend and i wasn't by his side (truth is i always have been by his side and never left him, spoiling him with love and sacrifices that i have done to him... i don't go anywhere because of him because he's jealous and i don't want him to feel alone so i go to uni and go home, i don't even see my friends because of him because i don't wanna make him sad). So i didn't reply to any of his talk. The next day i said i wanna give this relation a chance so i asked him a question : "Do u still love me, did u ever love me and will you always love me?" so he replied :" I got the answer but i won't tell you" so i said " I have to know so i can know how to deal with things from now on" he was like " Deal with it the way you want, you already did enough" so i didn't reply to him and didn't talk to him after that that was 3 weeks ago. This wednesday i said him on bbm hi and he replied hey and asked how is he and he was normal and u? i said im okay and he said good. so i didn't say any word after that. after 2 hrs i put a picture for me on whatsapp and BBM, so he said please remove me from here sorry for disturbing and block me on whatsapp if u care about not hurting me anymore. so i didn't reply to him and after a short time he said thanks for being disrespectful so i didn't reply to him and at 2 am he sent me on BBM " Hope when i wae up in the morning u will do the favor i asked you to and not putting more disrespectful behavio and the hurt you're doing to me. wish u the best but don't go to your past with such immature pictures and bad ones it doesn't go for you from an old friend and i prefer there won't be a HI between us cz you treated your ex's better than me and respected them but u didn't respect me knowing one took you to his home from the first day and the other one cheated on you, that's called not respecting, you left me i didn't say a word, you hurt me and i didn't do anything, i m not like your ex's but you all girls are the same there's no difference. if you're not gonna do the favour so i do it in the morning but please tell me that you won't do because you really did hurt me and i didn't expect that from you to go back to your past. wish u all the best regards, ur old friend" so i didn't reply to him because it's all untrue i didn't leave him and i did respect him i was more than good to him really i was. and after that he sent me "bye good luck on whatsapp with such pics" and i didn't say anything so he started pinging me a lot and than he removed me i didn't say anything. not even a word. I really loved this guy i don't know what hapened to him i wish i can get help to make him come back but with good intentions :( i miss him i don't understand why this hapened. Help

Ambassador Of Eros

October 26, 2012 @ (USA)

Tags: Facebook, long-distance, lying

I was with this girl, and we started dating. After about 2 weeks she called it off because we would be seperated the following year. I agreed, and we have kept in touch ever since. Since then , I have kinda had dibbs on her. She found me on facebook yesterday and friended me. Today I looked closer at her profile and it said:
Relationship Status: In a relationship
I wasnt sure if it was true because she forgets to chang a lot of things after something happens. So I messaged her asking if she had a boyfriend. I have not gotten a response yet. What II'm ad about is that she lied to me about having a bf. She had emailex ne asking if I had a gf, and I said no. I asked her the same (with bf instead of gf) and she said no.
Still waiting for the response to the fb message. It's kinda creepy thinking thatfacebook could change my life...

AL

October 21, 2012 @ (canada)

Tags: first heart break

my gf recently broke up with me and heres the story;
we were together for almost 2yrs and i thought she was the one. my family loves her and she gets along with my friends and vice-versa. she was my longest girlfriend and i let all of my guards down. we recently went on a trip too and i can remember a month before the trip she told me she doesnt feel the same way. but, me, blinded by love i ignored the warning and thought everything was ok and she was just having mood swings. as days, weeks went by she was back to normal. the day of the our 1 week trip comes, we were really happy and in love(atleast i was). so we get back from the trip(it was a great trip) and i thought everything was going fine. its september so we planned to spend the holidays together because my whole family is leaving the country for a month to spend the holidays over-seas. a few weeks after the trip its was september 28 to be exact, i was having a shitty day at work and looking forward to seeing and talking to her. that night, she just wanted to end our relationship, my heart sank while i asked her why and her reasons were: she's still young, she wants to figure herself out, she wants to experience life and she needs her own space. i talked her out of breaking up with me but i would give her a month break to have her space and to do her own thing. i tried to let her do her own thing but i failed, i still called, texted and saw her. that went on for a couple of weeks. she would still say i love you to me but whenever i was with her it didnt feel right anymore i mean i love her but i could just tell that she's fallen out of love with me. i was too stupid to be honest to myself and face that there was no point of me still trying, giving my absolute best to make things work out and make her fall in love again. but she would say the littlest things that would give me the biggest hope. so there i was again, lying to myself, prolonging my own agony, torturing myself. until a fews ago, i faced my fear. we were in her place we watched a movie after the movie we had a serious talk about our relationship. she was still trying to fall back in love with me but she also knew that there was really nothing there. so i told her if theres nothing there anymore dont bother. she wants to stay friends but that would be impossible for me. she loves me but not inlove with me. so i walked out of her house crying my eyes out my face was hurting alot for holding the tears for so long, carrying the bag of chips and dip i bought for the movie(she didnt want them). that night was the night i felt so bad for myself. only a few people know that we're broken up even our FB relationship status says we are still in the relationship. everyone thinks we were perfect for each other. i still need to have my question answered "why/how did she fall out of love?". it gets tougher everyday because i still have that little hope. im trying to be strong and busy to get over my first heart break. its so hard for me to tell people what im really feeling inside. my friends see me as a strong man yet i feel like a little kid inside hoping to be loved. im doing the best i can not to contact her. im trying to get back on my feet and just let things be. i dont know if she'll miss me and come back but i best not expect anything.

for other guys out there: growing up we were always taught to be tough, strong and not to show any kind of weakness. while, girls are taught the opposite they show emotions, how they feel and all girls out there expects to have their heart broken by a guy one day. us guys would never expect that. so when we guys get our hearts broken it would be unexpectedly fcked up for us.

atleast thats how i see why im having a difficult time coping with this.

well i got some out of my chest! thanks for reading