Searching for "regret"

55 Results For 'regret'

Jane Doe

February 26, 2014 @ (phoenix, AZ)

Tags: breakup family sister cheating drama mexicans will always believe their daughter

This is a really looong story.

Due to mutual friends, I was introduced to this guy. Lets call him Kev. We were only 15. We talked everyday on the phone. I had a feeling that he might like but I shrugged it off as I only saw him as a friend and I was still heart broken from my previous break up with "Stan". I loved Stan with all my heart and I still do! Anyways, after getting to know Kev, he asked me to be his gf 6 months later but I rejected him cause I couldn't get over Stan. Then we got into an argument about something stupid and stopped talking for about 2 months. He approached me when we started talking again. By then, I thought I was starting to get over Stan so I gave Kev a chance. We started dating and I was so happy cause it felt like Stan was starting to fade away in my mind (he never did). 4 months into our relationship, we had sex for the first time. We were both virgins so neither of us knew what to do. Needless to say, it sucked. But I was okay with it at first cause sex isn't everything. However, everytime we have sex, it felt terrible. My friends would suggests things but they never worked! I, on the other hand, became quite the expert in oral sex cause of all the advice my friends gave me. After 6 months of trying, I couldn't take it anymore. I tried breaking up with him but it made me realized how attached I am to him. So we got back together. Shortly after that, his bitchy older sister, "Stacy", found out we're in a serious relationship. Idk what's wrong with her, but she was insane! First, she lied to her family saying I harassed her via texts and they believed her! I was banned from the house until the lie was falling apart. The next time I saw her, she was angry cause Kev told her I went to the movies with my ex "Danny". Danny and I were really close friends. Yeah, he was madly in love with me but I didn't feel the same way. We would talk on and off cause everytime when are going well, he think he'd have a chance, so I would stop talking to him for a while. Anyways, Stacy was furious that I did that. She threatened me and said she will kill my ass next time. I wanted to say something back so I would look like a spineless person cause I'm not at all, but Kev just told me to ignore her. BIG MISTAKE. After that, she probably think I was weak cause she kept threatening me. Family did nothing. All they ever say is to ignore her. Well I got tired of her and I was still sexually frustrated, so I talked to Danny about it. Note this, Danny was saving his virginity for me and he was already 18 at the time. One thing led to another, I ended up sleeping with Danny (he sucked too). I deeply regretted it and confessed my crime to Kev. He was angry but he was glad I told him. In the end, I chose Kev over Danny. Now, all that we've been through, Stacy is still harassing me. And I felt like Kev cared more about his friends and family than me cause he never stood up for me. He claimed he has but I call bs. So once again, I was fed up. Another friend who was also head over heels for me was there to comfort me whenever Stacy would verbally abuse me. Needless to say, I made another mistake. I, again, confessed my crime to Kev and he was beyond angry because they go to the same school so he knew him. Well I tried breaking it off with Kev but everytime, something calls me back. I feel terrible for what I did and Kev always reminded me... No, the harassing never stopped. We almost got into a fight once...(she's 3x my size). I stopped the cheating, I didn't want it to turn into a habit. But then I found out he went and hung out with my friend's twin in the middle of the night. "Supposedly" nothing happened, but the twin said he tried to get at her. Idk who to believed so I dropped it. When we were together for about 1 1/2 year, he took this girl to Comicon. I smelled something fishy but again, he claimed nothing happened. Third strike, I found out he was kiking this girl "Joey". The old messages were already deleted but calling another "cutie" is already enough. We officially ended a month ago. We were together for 2 years and 5 months.

in the end, I learned not to meet the guy's family (especially the sisters), if I'm unhappy I should just leave and not cheat, and lastly, Kev is a lying cunt. He liked to remind me of my crimea but whenever I bring up his, he would always say "I didn't fuck her. You actually went and fucked Danny!" Yeah, he made me felt like shit

I know I made many mistakes in this relationship but damn, my life revolves around him. Idk how to function without him by my side... I should just stop talking to him, huh?

p.s. No, I never stopped thinking about Stan. He was my first love.

Brandon

February 10, 2014 @ (Portland, OR)

Tags: worst breakup, jerk, idiot, heart breaker, regretful

So, I had been dating this girl for about six months with a two month break in between, let's call her "Jackie". It was when we got back together I realized that things weren't going to work. She said that we just need to communicate more, but it never happened, we always just sat in awkward silence until one of us had to leave.
Before we get to the actual break-up, I want to do a little back-story. So a few years back my friends introduced me to this girl, not the one I broke up with, let's call her "Amanda." Amanda was a nice girl from the very start, She invited me to all her parties, and helped me out with my homework and essays. She was funny, she would often make fun of my now best friend, "Franklin," which I found hilarious. She was also super smart, she had one of the highest GPAs in the school, and passed even the most advanced classes. And I swear she is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, and to this day I am deeply in love with her. Unfortunately, when I told her about my feelings, she dropped the F-Bomb on me. Yep, that was my first ever "friend-zone." I was crushed, I never felt so terrible in my life. But I stayed adamant, and year after year I would ask her, and year after year she denied me. I realize that she can make whatever choice she wants, but I couldn't help but to want to be with her. I guess she must have gotten tired of me asking, because after the fourth confession, she suggested I go out with Jackie, whom I had met a month earlier. I knew she had a thing for me, and Amanda said we would be cute together. I don't know why, but the words "cute together" hit me really hard. Just the thought of being with someone other than her felt wrong. Things did go wrong eventually, I guess that's what happens when you go out with someone because the love of your life asks you to. I probably should have seen that coming. After dancing with Jackie at one of the parties, I became infatuated with her. I asked her out on a date, and she of course said yes. Now I had never gone out on a date before so I didn't know exactly what to do. And no one told me that movie dates are the worst first date you could go on. We sat in the theater eating our popcorn, eyes glued to the screen, not even looking at each other; the first of many awkward experiences. The worst part was that Amanda offered to drive us around since neither I or Jackie bothered to learn how to. Amanda couldn't have been more happy to see me going out with another girl, which I understand is something friends do, but when that friend has recently broken your heart, it kinda stings a little.
Fast forward four months. Now at this point we've decided to break things off for a while. Jackie has started dating this guy, let's call him "Matt." I had no problem with Jackie dating Matt, in fact I was happy that she found someone she could actually talk to. Matt and I are also good friends so, I was happy for both of them. Now with no one to distract my feelings, I began to feel old emotions rising again, I would often hang out with Amanda like we used to, but not in a way that would give any hints, just talking, and study sessions. I should have realized then that this was what it was meant to be like. Being single wasn't a bad thing, in fact I love being single. It makes you appreciate all the free time you once had to hang out with friends and get work done. This didn't last very long, because Jackie and Matt eventually broke up. I never got the exact details of why or how, but I do know that Jackie broke up with Matt, because she realized that she still loved me even though she was the one who broke up with me for Matt in the first place. Matt explained to me that he cared for her, and he wanted to see her happy, and that I should take her back. And I, being the stupid confused kid at the time, said "of course." And so, we began dating each other once more. The rekindled infatuation didn't last long, and I realized about a month in that things weren't going to work. Now came the biggest problem, how to break it to her. Now, just because I wasn't in love with Jackie doesn't mean I didn't care about her. She was genuinely sweet and innocent, and I couldn't bare to see her sad or upset.
It was only a few weeks later that I built up the courage to tell her, mind you I gave no clue as to how I really felt, in fact I made it seem like everything was just dandy, which in hindsight wasn't the best idea. Of course, when I told her she was really confused. She asked me "Why? Why?" and I said "I'm sorry, I just don't think you're the one for me." At this point her sadness began to turn to anger. Something I had never seen in her before suddenly began to show. She said, "how dare you have the audacity to lead me on for so long. You know what? Fuck you." The words "fuck you" would have hurt less if she hadn't smiled and started walking away. But as I sat there, ashamed of what I had done, she did the worst thing she could have done to me. She turned back with tears running down her face and said, "I really did love you." And continued walking away. That must have been one of the worst days of my life. Eventually the sadness subsided, and she forgot all about me, which was probably for the best. Not once in our whole relationship did we ever say "I love you" to one another. But if I could go back and change what I did, I would have never gone out with her. I would have never gotten back together with her. I would have never led her on to believe that I loved her. And I would have never broken her heart.

Shabda

February 07, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: bad break ups

Hey!!!
I want to share my story just to ease some pain...You know the worst part is when you have no one around you to share your feelings.....
I am from a typical Indian family.A girl who has always loved her parents more than anything in her life. Wanted to be with them always, take care of them. Infact I had decided that I'm never going to marry anyone ever.So, I never allowed myself to have any soft corner for anyone. I was happy but then someday I got a message from some old batchmate of mine on Facebook. Gradually we started chatting, sharing thoughts, jokes, started talking on phone and literally got addicted to each other. I started considering him as my best friend. He has always been real nice to me, always convinced me that one day I will find someone who will accept myself with all my responsibilities and will respect and love my parents like his own. And then after 6 months the day came when he proposed me. I was already having a hint of this from the past couple of days. I really liked him but had never thought about him like that because we had same gotra (we Indians are prohibited to marry someone with same gotra) . I never wanted to disclose my feelings to him but also didn't want to hurt him with a 'NO', So I told him this all gotra thing and convinced him to just be friends. But with time we just got drifted away and started living in an illusion that something will happen and we will be together in future...Decided that we will convince our parents and will marry with their permission....Started planning our lives together, fully committed, making all the promises to be together till the end, never realizing that they were all just dreams...We were madly, deeply in love. We completely accepted eachother as husband and wife...I was sure of one thing that it was not physical attraction though he was no less than Prince charming...I mean how could it be ...We haven't met each other for the last 7 years...
Time passed....We were so in love... I had never realized that this much love existed on earth. Even the feeling of having him with me made me so comfortable, cozy, relaxed...I felt so complete with him.....I never even required to say what I was feeling,,,we just not needed any words to express each other...
Then one day somehow my parents found out about us....I told them how much I love him and also assured them that I will never do anything without their permission....They were so mad at me...They said straight forward NO just because I being a female was having higher education that him...There was a big emotional drama......I tried my best to convince them but all in vain......And finally asked me to choose between them and him...This was even before I could tell them about gotra thing.....After all this I realized one thing that they are never going to accept us and if I somehow force them to or do something on my own, he will never get the respect he deserves....I love him but I respect him more.....I just can't bear this fact that my family don't respect my husband.....So, I broke up with him...Told him that they think that we will have ego clashes in future....He hates me for this...I know...Infact I hate myself too for this.....I feel so sorry that I couldn'd keep all the promises we made.....Everytime I think about this it feels like something cuts me from inside.....I know in this relationship it was me who was unfair.....It's been long time since we broke up but still every night I silently weep thinking about him...I still love him and miss him so much.....He was my first and last love......I know I will never be able to feel the same way again.....I am all broken.....People says that time heals all the wounds but in my case I feel like this pain is increasing day by day....This regret, this pain is my punishment.....And now I myself don't want to let it go...At least in this way he is with me....I know that I can never have him back but still wait for him forever.....And if some day I got to know about his marriage I will be the first person to be happy for him,,,at least he has moved on....

Kate

November 12, 2013 @ (Uew York)

Tags: Breakup, too young, sad

Lost Love
I broke up with my boyfriend two months ago. We were together for 1 year. I only have myself to blame. I knew our relationship wouldnâ€™t work when we first started dating. We lived so far away from each other and we were so immature. It was too serious and we were too young. If I only knew then what I know now.

We would try to see each other every other week. For one year we did this. The bus trip took about six hours. At the time it didnâ€™t matter because I got to see him at the end of the trip. When I finally saw him after those six long hours, I wouldnâ€™t feel a thing. Our relationship was an illusion. We looked so cute in front of people but when we were alone we would always fight. The first six months was fine, but the other half was hell. We fought each night, even when we were not together. He would yell at me over the phone and I would yell back. When I said I didnâ€™t want to do this anymore, he would push me on the bed and just lay on top of me hugging me and I would forget everything. I know he didnâ€™t want me to go but we couldnâ€™t keep on living like this. Things were badâ€¦really bad and something had to change.

One night we finally ended it all.

Oh God, the agony. The pain is unbelievable. Itâ€™s rushing through my body, my veins, my soul. The memories take me back to that place. The night where it all went wrong. I said we couldnâ€™t do this anymore. You said you didnâ€™t want to break up. We had to end it; we couldnâ€™t keep on going like this. We shouted, we cried, we loved, one last time. It all played out so well. My hands in your hair, your name on my lips and your hands on my hips. The warmth of each other kept the room warm. It was love in the atmosphere. We looked at each other; and just like that, it all went away. The love we sheared, fading. The feelings we had, forgotten. The warmth in the room, gone.

The morning after.
I walked you to the stairs. You stood there confusing. I stood right beside you holding your hand. The stairs were hard to walk. I felt like a rock every time I took a step. We stopped at the front door. You looked in to my eyes as you had your hand on the door handle. Your eyes were blank and full of tears just waiting to run down your face. We kissed one last time. I cried as you took your bag and walked out the door. I watched you walk away; you stopped and looked back. I remember those other times youâ€™ve left, you would run back straight away, but this time you didnâ€™t. You just kept on walking. And just like that you were gone.

As I watched you drive away, I felt a raindrop on my skin. It ran down my face; just like the tears in my eyes. The begging of a journey for some people, but an ending of a journey for us.

Now itâ€™s finally over. I regret nothing.

Jenna

November 03, 2013 @ (LA)

Tags: young love, sad, bipolar, jerk, young, bad break up, boys, guys, high school

I told him everything. I made myself completly vulnerable.. and I regret that. I really do. I already knew it wouldn't last forever, it never does, especially when you're so young. That feeling just.. wore off. He used to type a long paragraph just about how gorgeous he thinks I am but that slowly resolved to one word replies.. And remember that girlfriend? Yea, that came back to bite me in the butt. She started all this drama, constantly texting

Edan

March 29, 2013 @ (san diego)

Tags: ?

My boyfriend of 1 year broke up with me and I am devastated . This was my first relationship and I feel an immense heartache. I feel I'm to blame because of my anger and distrust when he didn't give me a reason to. People say he'll come back but I highly doubt it. It hurts everyday and its barely been a week. I know he wants nothing to do with me. I feel like this feeling will never go away. Everything reminds me of him. I still love him. If he loved me, where did that love go? Or was it never love. If I could turn back time I would because I'm filled with regret, sadness and regret. What hurts more is he's already moving on. Love sucks.

Nameomitted

March 19, 2013 @ (United States)

Tags: break up, long distance

We were never really official but this feels like a break up to me. We met in November. He was a military guy, no car, was leaving in a couple months. So at first we kept it casual. When he left on holiday leave we were both expecting him to return--he never did. Even though it was just a fling, it felt so unfinished. We'd text almost every day. At one point he said he missed me, and so I brought up the possibility of an LDR. We talked about the cost and how often we'd get to see one another, but in the end he said he hated LDRs, which I interpreted as a no. Yet we kept in touch, and I wanted to see him so badly. I wanted it more than I have wanted anything, I was so sprung on this guy. So I flew out to visit him last week. But I felt like he kept holding back, which in turn made me nervous. I froze up, and the entire week was a mix of silence and awkwardness. There were moments where we'd liven up, and we were only able to soften up physically--not just sex, but touches, caresses, neck rubs. The physical connection wasn't as crazy raw as I remembered it being, but we were still good together. It was still hot. However, I think my quietness got to him, and by the end of the week we were both exhausted. I could tell that he had run out of patience, and I had tired myself out by silently worrying and wondering and panicking. By the time I left we just waved goodbye. No hug, no kiss, not even a handshake.

On one hand, while I was out there I was noticing things about him that I didn't see before, and I would think to myself, "Hmm... no, I don't think we'd work as a couple." I know that we wouldn't. We have the same interests, and we're physically compatible. We're both thoughtful and affectionate. But intellectually, we don't really connect. Maybe I'm a little too independent for him? I don't know. We have different values. I actually found him to be kind of boring most of the time. He probably thought the same of me. I don't think we're actually boring people, but we tend mute each other out for some reason. But even with all that, it was one of the hardest break-ups I've had. Maybe because I was so invested in the dream of him, in the possibility, in the romantic star-crossed-lovers feel of the whole situation. That and my ego is kind of bruised. I was in love with his body, that's for sure.

I wanted it to be him, you know? I wanted him to tell me he wanted to work something out. I wanted to move clear across the country for him. I loved it out there and would love the adventure of it all, but I'm not going to lie that having him out there with me was the top reason I wanted to move. I wouldn't be alone. I have family and friends out there, so it wouldn't have been JUST for him. I guess I could still move if I wanted to, even if we never spoke again...

I hate that I get moody and distant when emotion overwhelms me. I shut off, and in those times it's nearly impossible for me to communicate how I'm feeling. When I panicked, I would push him away. That's one of the things I regret the most. I wasn't at my best, as hard as I tried. I feel... not good enough. Disheartened. The day he dropped me at the airport I still had a 2 hour wait, on top of a 6 hour flight. And I was fighting back tears the whole time. And I still have my spells of utter sadness.

In my heart, I know it's for the best. I know that I'll get over it, like I always do. I know that in time I'll look back and be able to see that it was a fun experience, and I'll be able to see how much I learned from it all. But right now, in the thick of it, it's a struggle to get through the day. I just want to go home and curl up and cry. But I have to work, and go to class, and be mature. And I don't want to annoy my friends and family by ranting and venting all the time, so I came here... It kind of helps, sharing this with strangers. So thanks.

Breakfastclub

February 27, 2013 @ (Kansas)

Tags: exbf, manipulator, liar, selfish

My ex boyfriend and I broke up about 2 and a half years ago, but all this time we never stopped talking. We remained in a sexual relationship all this time. During this time he treated me poorly, then we would fight and then he would treat me better... until the next fight. He always knew what to say and how to act to calm me down and convince that he cared for me. During this time he talked to 3 other girls, and in all the occasions I told him I didn't want to talk to him anymore, but he would insist in staying in my life. We had a bad fight in all three occasions and then once things started not working out with the girl he would apologize saying he recognized he didn't treat me well. I have asked him several times to stay away, to let me go, and he would for a couple of weeks but then he would come back and I was enough of an idiot to let him back in. Well in December I told him we should stop seeing each other, then he said "ok" but soon started messaging me saying he wanted to see me once I got home from Christmas break. Then we hung out a couple of times in January, but then he started being really rude to me so I told him to not talk to me anymore. We hadn't talked to me in a while and then I (was being stupid again) texted him saying I was ok with us not talking but I wanted to understand why. Then he replied "get over me, i'm talking to a girl in high school" (detail: we are both 22 and college students). I laughed because that's just pathetic. Well the next week I saw him at a dance at our college, and I was a little tipsy and in a bad mood and angry at him so I walked by him and pumped into him. He texted me all angry, but then the next morning he was being all sweet saying I look beautiful at the dance and that he wanted to see me. So I said "what about your high schooler?" then he replied "Oh I lied, I just said that to piss you off". I knew he was lying about that, I know he actually talked to her and I knew she had probably dumped him already. Well,I didn't let him come over to my apartment. I didn't want to see him at all. Then I realized on his twitter that he was talking to her again so I asked him "why did you lie about not talking to her?" then he answered "i don't have to explain anything to you" (wow, dick). Well after that we talked a couple more times and then I noticed there was nothing wrong because of some things he posted on twitter. Then we were talking and he said someone screwed things up. Well it was obviously her. Then a few days later I drove by his house (which is right across from my apartment) and I saw a car there, so I asked if it was hers and he said yes. Well I got pissed out and said terrible things to him. We argued bad, I told him he was nothing to me, and I regretted having let him in back in my life so many times, he got really mad when I said that and then he told me he didn't want to talk to me anymore. Then the next day we argued again and this time he told me "shut up, don't talk to me, don't talk about me, and don't talk about her". I know I screwed up in a few aspects, but in no way I'm blaming myself for what did. He lied to me several times, and he manipulated me to get just what he wanted. He is the most selfish and egocentric person I have ever met. All he thinks is about himself. Now that he is happy with her there is no way in hell that he will apologize for the mean things he said to me. What I heard is that she is a little high school slut, so I guess she is a good fit for him. I know I deserved some of it, but he was never considering towards my feelings. We were still kinda up in the air, and he knew I had feelings for him, and he didn't understand when I tried to explain why I was mad/upset. He pretty much said "this is your problem, not mine, deal with it". This last couple of weeks have been tough, but I will not let him bring me down. I am starting to see that I didn't lose anything, I actually won, because I got rid of an abusive, manipulative boy and now I am free to find a man, who can care for me and be what my ex could never be.

Karen

February 03, 2013 @ (Pennsylvania, USA)

Tags: breakup, mistake, regret

Where to begin? I guess I should start with when we met. It was April 9th, 2012; the day we got back from a trip for marching band. I was talking to my friend Melanie and she said, "you should try to talk to new guys. You never know, something good might come out of it." I said, "who should I talk to though and how?" That's when she suggested I talk to the guy who would eventually be the best boyfriend I've ever had: Brandon. So, when I got home, I message him on Facebook because I had nothing better to do and I thought if I went up to him in person and talked to him that it would be weird. I doubted that he even knew who I was (I was wrong about that. Turns out our friend Nick had told him that he should date me when I was a freshman. I'm now a junior and he was a sophomore at the time. We're in high school). So, we hit it off and everything seemed great. But as months passed I was wondering why he never asked me out. He told me he wanted to get to know me better first. So then the summer went by and we didn't talk much. Then in August 2012, we had band camp and we started talking again. He asked me if I wanted to sit with him on the bus on the way to competitions. I said yes. The bus rides were always fun and he was a really big flirt. Once again, I began to wonder why he wasn't asking me out, but this time I didn't bring it up. Then on November 6th, 2012, we hung out and he asked me out. The way he did it was really corny, but it was cute. I was so happy. Then, 2 weeks later he told me that he didn't want me hugging other guys, because he wanted it to be an exclusive part of our relationship. I thought this was dumb, but I just said okay because I didn't want to start anything. This were going fine and then two weeks later, he told me to switch lockers and move into his (I was previously sharing one with my best friend, Louis). I think he was just jealous or insecure. Maybe both. I was his first girlfriend, so maybe he was just scared he'd lose me or something. So, that weekend he's over my house. We've made out before but we had never used tongue and we tried it but I didn't like it. He got frustrated and said that "it's a way to kiss. How can you not like it?" I said I didn't know. Then over the next two weeks it seemed like everyday he said he was getting frustrated with me. I was getting upset and depressed because I felt like I was letting an not being a good enough girlfriend. So, eventually I decided to break up with him on December 14th, 2012, because I just wasn't happy anymore. I did it over the phone because the only other time I would have been able to do it was at school or at my house and that would have been awkward. So I was on the phone with him and I did it. I broke up with him. He didn't say anything and I started to cry. I felt really bad and him not saying anything made me feel worse. Then five minutes later he said "Can we still be friends?" I said "yes" he said "okay. Bye." And hung up. I kept crying for a good 3 hours. He called me like 2 hours later but I was asleep. He left a voicemail saying that he hopes that I don't think he's mad at me and that he wishes things could have worked out but he's glad we can still be friends. I was happy about that. But as the weeks passed it seemed like he wanted the opposite. Now, he rarely talks to me and I feel like when he does, I annoy him. I miss him so much and it's ridiculous. I want him back, but I know he'll never want me again. I at least want to be friends again. I asked him to my junior prom, so maybe that will help, but we'll have to wait and see. Is there anything else I can do? I think I might be in love with Brandon and knowing that I screwed things up just hurts so much. I want to fix it. Breaking up with him was probably the biggest mistake in my life and I regret it so much.

Jacob D

January 14, 2013 @ (Ohio)

Tags: Games

Okay so im 14 i like this girl on a videogame Xbox360 to be exact her name on there is m*** and she at the time was 14 and i was 13 so i meet her beacause of my friend and im in chat with her and a bunch of dudes and of course everyone wants her, im jealos bla bla bla and i keep being sweet to her, my friends are like omg your so hot and the gentleman i am say wow, you are the most beautiful girl i've ever seen. She freaks out and says you guys but g*** (thats me lol) are pervs she leaves chat and my friends are hating on me. She wants me to join chat and I do she says she thinks im funny. And of course im just like , oh, Stop it you lol.Anyway i spend a week talking to her and my game system breaks and i start to think omg its the end of the world i get a new one 3 months later i send her a friend request she accepts and im just like doing a victory dance and the the next day i send her a message and i say good morning beautiful, no reply so i say how is your day going the a random dude says to quit messaging so im like who are you her boyfriend and he says actually i am and i just flip im so pis#ed off i send her a message i called her a bit#h and i regret it to this day i think of her all of this time she blocked me so i cant say im sorry for calling her a bit@h. Tell me what to do! i miss her !