Searching for "pain"


109 Results For 'pain'

Delta

October 02, 2016 @ (Southern Russia )

Tags: Bad Breakup


So when I was in 10th grade I saw this girl in Engineering class and she was my first Crush ever, I thought she was perfect, She had this long beautiful hair, breathtaking smile, cute, a little bit shy, challenging, caring and had some little knowledge about video gaming which was my weak spot. This was also my first love, I tried to flirt with her but I was a very insecure person at that time, I was pretty much obese (115 KG,253 lbs) and I was the probably the ugliest guy in the class :(, my flirting skills were a disaster and she eventually had a boyfriend from another class, they were together for 4 months and after that they broke up.
I dreamt about this girl for a whole year and I told myself that in 11th grade I will make something out of myself and I will GET HER.
Starting from February 2016 and till July 2016 I lost 37 KG (that's 81 pounds) and went from 115 to 78 KG (253 lbs to 171 lbs), I lost weight for my own private reasons but one of the main one was for my crush. The WHOLE SCHOOL was in complete shock of my body transformation (I'm talking about teachers, students, janitors, community workers, cooks, friends) and I was voted student of the year in my school, I've never felt this much happiness in a long time, I've felt completely on top of the world, my confidence rose up and I felt that I needed to flirt with my crush, but that failed too.
Eventually I found a job in my school and I worked there as a painter (I painted the walls, classrooms and etc... for the school year) to pay truck driving license. And then one day my CRUSH showed up in the school and literally started talking to me straight away, I was really busy with my work and I told her if she can hold on just for a few minutes but she ignored me and we started talking, the conversation went deep in a matter of minutes, I though to myself ''SO FAR SO GOOD'' and we literally spent the next 2 months (June and July) talking to each other on the phone ever SINGLE day. one day when I felt the right time to quit my job, I told her that I wanted to hang out with her (was my first time talking to a girl over whatsupp) and we've set the meeting in my city.
During August we hanged out every day and we felt closer and closer with each meeting. During the beginning of 12th grade (the final senior year) I told her that I loved her over the phone and she said she loves me too. It was the most magical moment that I've heard over the phone. The next morning we went to quiet place in my school yard near the teachers parking lot and we kissed, it was my first kiss EVER and especially with my crush, it was such a special moment in my life and I will never forget it, I've felt completely happy. We were the most popular couple in my school apparently because people had known me for being a single guy for my whole life.
After a week and 4 days my nightmares became to reality, we broke up.
I wasn't depressed but I felt sad as fuck man, we had a fight the night before and its just a long story, things weren't going great for us, so we decided to break up.
I was very sad with myself, and I was being told that time heals everything, and I shouldn't be upset because we were barely together for a month,but it doesn't matter if the relationship lasted for a week, I've felt heartbroken and pretty sad with myself.
She on the other hand felt completely good after the break up and told me that she had 2 boyfriends before me and she is going to chase for another one and I need to do the same, find the one, she told me that I will fine the love of my life but to never give up, even in my darkest moments of my life.
I will never forget these words that she said to me the day after our break up. But the awesome memories we had together still taunt me till this very minute. And the worst thing is, I pretty much regret the decision to leave her.
I've came to the point that not anything that shines has to be golden.
I feel very disappointed because I've wasted so many energy over her for the past 2 years.
But I need to look at the bright sight, this short relationship taught me that to make sure I will never do any mistakes in my next serious relationship, life is one hell of a tough journey, and we need to keep going, keep looking forward and never give up.


       

Madhavi-ald

June 20, 2016 @ (india)

Tags: bad breakup


1 year from now i met a girl. I am a singer so was just performing in a college event. A girl was staring at me after my performance(in which i won).She was just sitting on a row ahead of me and she was continously staring ... i have been in 15 relationships so have a gud experience of what was it going to be. She searched my name as we din't had anything in comman. She message me on fb . And very next day she asked me to come for a walk in campus late in night. We had a good talk and she messaged me that night that she has a boyfriend.. i was like who cares. Next night she called me for a walk and that night THINGS happened and we were close . I always tried to stay emotionally away from her because she was in relation for two years that too non problematic relationship. After that we met almost daily for 4 months she was in relationship with a guy who was earlier in college was a senior so was working in a company in different city so for those 4 months whenever she met she used to say sweet things and show her affection n then she left her boyfriend. I asked her to not to leave him because i had stuff to do so cannot give her that much of time. but she broke up with him. I was also kindof liking her i was a plyboy but i started liking her because once she went to meet her boyfriend then i was not feeling good about it. But she then left her boyfriend came to me.. She always knew about experiences of girls i had so so used to say that i cannot be serious for a single girl. But sometimes being human when she flirted with someone else i used to feel bad about it and i said her. I too had many option of girls which she knew already but i began falling for her. I am a focussed man so was doing the stuff that i was supposed to do in my career so could not give her that much of time but i always tried to give her as much of time as possible . So i started falling for her even more.. i started actually loving her.. i had to go through many things in life which made me a kindof heartless playboy.. i was having a good career i am a singer , guitarist, painist, composer , millionaire, boxer(upto state level) and amazing at s**(because experince matters) so as per now u might have guessed there was no scarcity for girls .. but i was falling for her.. i started expressing to her my love.. in every way possible.. bt never lost balance as generally guys do. Now one day she comes to me saying "she wants to be friend" then next day" she wants to do her work" then next day "she wants her boyfriend back" . after 9 months of all she is suddenly realizing that she loved her ex only so she wants to move with that guy. Was i just a puppet? She shows no feeling for me now.. When she was cheating with that guy for me.. when she can come physically close to me third day after we met after a relation of 2 years then she can cheat me too.. Bitches will be bitches.. lesson learnt never trust a beaultiful face .. if she is a liar .. she will take use of u till she wants and then just hire a new boyfriend to fuck her.. NEVER TRUST LIARS.. if she can lie to him she can lie to me too.. i missed that point.


       

Henrietta

March 22, 2016 @ (China)

Tags: painfullbreakupandstilllonging


We were together for months. He loved me deeply. For me? I love him so much and three months later after he broke up with me I am still in so much agony. It was a long distance relationship. I was going to come after a year since I am still in college. I was just asking for one year. Not ten years, not twenty three, not even three. Just one year. But somehow he kinda lost his grip. Until now, I really do not know why we just all of a sudden fell apart. And I could not understand why we cannot fight for us. He said he has his own life now and he can no longer run this marathon with me. Was I depending too much on him for emotional support because of depression from my family problems? Was I too needy or too clingy? But I promise I never complained when he was busy. I just do not know why or how he fell out of love for me. Every single day, I ask why. I wonder if he ever opens his Skype and reads my messages begging him for another chance. Now, I am about to graduate but I have no direction since the man at the end of the tunnel, well he is no longer there to keep his promise. I am just totally lost and miserable. But I am not mad. I do not resent him either. I am grateful for everything. I just want to be his girl and I would give my all. (Sorry for any typos.)


       

Deanna

March 16, 2016 @ (ny)

Tags: Broken Heart


Before I share my story just a quick history. I had a 3 year relationship in high school i fell out of love then I met Erik and i was head over heels for about 8 months little dod I know he had feelings for his ex and his best friend. Being paranoid about this i gave him an ultamaduim and he broke it off. After this I did not believe in love I thought he was the one then I met chris. I dont know why I loved him since he was mentally abusive but I did. He also broke up with me while this was happening I had met another guy but he was just a friend to help me. And here is where my break up story begins. At first we just hooked up weird for me because I have never been that type but I felt so safe and comfortable with him. Although I didnt trust him because of my other relationships so he broke up with me briefly then we got back together. We then moved in together and were together for a year and a half. I kept threatening to kick him out because he was misplacing money and other events. He got sick of it and broke up with me. I understood that what I did was painful to him but I just thought he would try to workout it out since we had spent so much time together and lived together. I just don't know where to go from here. After Erik i didn't believe in love then i met my last bf and starting believing again now im back to where i started.


       

Aziellie

January 17, 2016 @ (Manila)

Tags: Breakup


Me and my ex boyfriend were living together for almost 2 years when we broke up. The unforgetable date was December 29, 2015. He said he wanted to prioritize his family, friends and his self. He said he's tired with everything. I wasn't expecting that to happened. We were so happy last Christmas that's why I was really shocked. My heart was in bad shape after that. I tried to accept it and tried to think all of the bad things we had in the relationship but in the end everything went down. I couldn't focus at work, he said he won't go back to the apartment if i'm still there. Everything seems to be falling apart. He went home December 31 to get some clothes and I did take that chance to begged....begged...begged... but all he said was "no". I don't know what to do, I planned everything with him on it. I don't understand why it was so easy for him to let me go. For him to dumped me.. I gave my best and all in that relationship. I prioritized him in everything.. I tried to be okay for about 2 weeks when he started texting and I did reply because I missed him. We talked after 2 weeks and he said he wanted to give our relationship a chance but that chance did not last for a day. He texted me that night and all he said was "sorry". I was so hurt and hopeless again. I asked him to give me a week but he said "no" again. He agreed to have a dinner the next day where I ended begging for his love. I told him that I'm not expecting anything for him and asked him to give me 1 week to stay but he said "no". He said he wanted to go home and again I begged for him to accept me even just for a night and finally I heard the word "yes". That whole night was so painful, I just cried the whole night because he made me feel that I'm not there. Pain was higher that the love that I have. I prayed for more strength, I prayed that no one will also feel the pain that I have..


       

Scarlett Withmore

December 01, 2015 @ (The Solar System - I live with Chewbacca)

Tags: bad break up


My names is Scarlett Withmore, I am 17 years old, and life for me has just sucked in every way. My family and I moved to Somerville, a small town in Georgia about six months ago. Changes really suck and all, i thought life was over until I met Evan. Evan was my gorgeous neighbor with green eyes, dark brown hair, tall and lean, and captain of the swimming team, he was the unbelievably hot boy next door. At first I kind of stalked him, well i'd see him through our windows in our bedrooms which faced each other. Then he just started talking to me, and gosh did I died.. He asked me out and of course I said yes. Evan was simply perfect and life was as beautiful and perfect as it could get for me,until one night. It was my 18 birthday and Evan had promised he'd ask my hand in marriage. I called him once, twice, so many times that my fingers hurt so much from dialing. That night I cried so much, I thought he'd only used me just for his amusement, but I was wrong. Evan's mother came the next day. Evan had died in a car crash, one caused by a drunk driver. My life was over. The future we planned was buried with him. I still feel the pain, all of it, i just hope that one day I will heal, or least that I'll see him again at least once more.


       

Saleena

November 18, 2015 @ (Australia )

Tags: broken heart


OK well a few weeks ago a guy broke my heart into millions of pieces and i couldn't do anything about ..... could i ??? honestly i still have hope that we will get back together but in my mind he has made it pretty clear he doesn't like me anymore cause he has a crush on someone else and has successfully started dating her ...But people have different ways of moving on and im just doing it slowly he has his reasons for breaking up with me that i didn't see and still dont know why . This would have been the 2nd time we went out the first time was as good but the 2nd time was better we improved on the things we needed to be improved on and i am still strongly in love with him and its going to take me a while to get over but honestly YES i am ONLY 13 but age is just a number all my friends have told me i will get over it just like he has but i honestly cant he is the only person i want my heart to be broken by. the reason im writing this isn't to show people, i just want to get this out of my head and see if it it sounds as stupid as people think. i don't know why but he has broken my heart twice and every time i haven't been able to hate him or dis like him or love him less than i do i know his feelings are gone and he doesn't like/love me anymore but no matter how hard i try and trust me i have tried these feelings wont disappear but why aren't i surprised this one absolutely amazing guy has taken my heart and cased a spell on me i don't no how to deal with these things im only 13 and i have fallen deeply in love. All my friends think he is an awful person for breaking up with me the way he did which was through my friend on a phone call and obviously i was in tears but it was kind he said he didn't want to do it in person cause he didn't want to see me cry.... which i did in fact cry quite ALOT. i have honestly never cried over a guy besides him both times i have cried when he broken up with me and every single time i always fall for him again why... THIS PAIN that i get every time im around him kills me i struggle some days seeing him smiling and laughing with other girls it makes me notice that he has moved on and he actually deserves a better girl than me i made his life stressful that's all i could give to him not love and comfort but stress. i still love him like seriously who couldn't fall in love with a guy like him he is all i think about every single second minute and hour of the day. know im looking back and the time we shared together, the best days of my high school year was the days i spent with him. If i did show any one this i know they will say im just 13 i will find someone again and all of that, that i have heard PLENTY of times. One of the reasons why i have fallen in love with him is cause when he is with me he is a completely different person he is loving comforting and over all just AMAZING and i feel like a different person, every time we were on the phone would be the most memorable moments, we would talk about the future and what it would be like and all of those amazing things but know that has all gone to waste In one letter he wrote me on our 1 month in the end it said i may hold your hand for a while but you will hold my heart forever and i don't know if that was true but at the time i did believe it and he does and will hold my heart forever. Everything i said to him was true, he may not believe it but its true. I AM TRULY SORRY FOR SCREWING THINGS UP WITH HIM and i hate myself everyday for it that it was my fault he is out of my life likely to be FOREVER and i cant control that. i have made a lot of mistakes in my life but loosing him would be the one that i regret and wish i could change the way things turned out for us but I cant control his feelings and at the moment i cant control my own feelings either at the moment all i do know is that i have fallen deeply in love with this absolutely amazing guy ......
^^^
THAT IS MY STORY


       

Sarah

November 06, 2015 @ (austin tx)

Tags: strength in weakness


So, I have had my fair share of bad breakups, bad relationships and just bad times... when i met him, i just fell head of heals. one he was so good looking, i thought i was the luckiest girl in the world being able to call him mine.. he had the most amazing heart, so pure and always trying to be closer to God... I admired him so much for his humble personality and strive to be a better man... i loved him and he fell in love with me... but after time, we realized we both wanted different things, he didn't want to travel, he wanted to stay in the same small town, he didn't care for finishing college as i wanted to eventually get my doctorates... he said he felt like we just weren't compatable.. and it broke my heart but when it happened... i remembered my breakup before him and how i would lean on drinking and clubbing to find comfort only to lead myself into an even more painful path... this time, i decided to read the bible, to pray more.. and i am still trying to do so... things happen in our life, that makes us want to crawl into bed and never get up... but we have to be strong, and that strength doesn't come from drinking, or partying or hooking up with other people... it comes from the one who know us better than anyone else, the one who died so that we can have a chance... i dont know if you believe in God of not... or if you are struggling with faith, or if you just don't know about God, but when something happens in your life that brings you down... God could be using it as an opportunity to draw him closer to you... cause it's at our weakest that his strength shines the brightest... losing my boyfriend sucked, it broke my heart and i had to deal with a lot of self esteem issues... but i'm trying every day to be happy... to see the bigger picture... to be able to say i may not be fine right now, but God has a plan for me...
i just encourage anyone with a broken heart to pray, it is so powerful and can really make a difference... it is for me at least


       

Noy

November 02, 2015 @ (Los Angeles )

Tags: Everything happens for a reason


We met my sophomore year of high school, his junior. He was tall, lean, blonde and gorgeous. At the beginning, I was normal. I treated him right and gave him everything. Gave him my virginity a couple months in, there was nothing I wouldnt give him. But a year and a half had passed so quickly. I didnt notice how awful of a person i had became. I was so irritated by his stupidity, even when he was not stupid. I was angry and I felt trapped, I blamed him for my sadness. I treated him so terrible and I took his love for granted. Though, after a year I had began noticing my abuse to him and decided i wanted to be better for him. I began changing, showing him my love, spoiling him. I wanted to make it up to him. But my damage was done. In the remaining months of our relationship when we first got out first job, he began talking to this girl. He started to not call me, text me, see me. I would ask him why and he responded that he didn't know why. That he forgot. The now and then we did hang, he was texting her. He said she was helping him pursue his dream of drawing. I said okay. He just grew so distant and I was growing so attached. The day he broke up with me was outside my house, I was late for work but needed to see him since he used every excuse to not see me. He finally did, and we broke up. I lead it on. I knew he wasnt happy, that i didnt make him happy. So i encouraged him to break up, and that we were going to be okay. He cried. I did too. He agreed and he ended it. Except... he kissed me goodbye. That was when I felt such pain and disbelief, how could i have let him go? i drove to work in tears, almost got into an accident. I was such a mess and in such a shock. I texted him i didnt want to break up, he didnt reply. I ended up calling and he picked up, explaining this is what he wanted, then saying it wasnt, then saying it was, then saying it wasnt. So i indeed kept hope. We made a deal that he would come to his decision the following thursday a week from then. I kept hope. I called him that monday asking id he had made a decision, he said yes. He made it a while ago, but he wasnt going to tell me till friday. That break up was the most painful thing i have ever dealt with. I had a lot of problems that he only knew about, i was open with him completely. Trusted him. Love him. I had made him my world and left all my friends. When he dumped me, I had no one. So i rebounded. cried. rebounded. cried. Then realized that everything happens for a reason. In this case, i was a terrible person to him. He brought out the worse in me. He didnt deserve it. Im glad he dumped me, i wouldnt have worked hard to change my ways. He wouldnt have been so happy. Hes the one who got away and I miss him. Will always love him. And I am sorry.


       

Noy

November 02, 2015 @ (Los Angeles )

Tags: Everything happens for a reason


We met my sophomore year of high school, his junior. He was tall, lean, blonde and gorgeous. At the beginning, I was normal. I treated him right and gave him everything. Gave him my virginity a couple months in, there was nothing I wouldnt give him. But a year and a half had passed so quickly. I didnt notice how awful of a person i had became. I was so irritated by his stupidity, even when he was not stupid. I was angry and I felt trapped, I blamed him for my sadness. I treated him so terrible and I took his love for granted. Though, after a year I had began noticing my abuse to him and decided i wanted to be better for him. I began changing, showing him my love, spoiling him. I wanted to make it up to him. But my damage was done. In the remaining months of our relationship when we first got out first job, he began talking to this girl. He started to not call me, text me, see me. I would ask him why and he responded that he didn't know why. That he forgot. The now and then we did hang, he was texting her. He said she was helping him pursue his dream of drawing. I said okay. He just grew so distant and I was growing so attached. The day he broke up with me was outside my house, I was late for work but needed to see him since he used every excuse to not see me. He finally did, and we broke up. I lead it on. I knew he wasnt happy, that i didnt make him happy. So i encouraged him to break up, and that we were going to be okay. He cried. I did too. He agreed and he ended it. Except... he kissed me goodbye. That was when I felt such pain and disbelief, how could i have let him go? i drove to work in tears, almost got into an accident. I was such a mess and in such a shock. I texted him i didnt want to break up, he didnt reply. I ended up calling and he picked up, explaining this is what he wanted, then saying it wasnt, then saying it was, then saying it wasnt. So i indeed kept hope. We made a deal that he would come to his decision the following thursday a week from then. I kept hope. I called him that monday asking id he had made a decision, he said yes. He made it a while ago, but he wasnt going to tell me till friday. That break up was the most painful thing i have ever dealt with. I had a lot of problems that he only knew about, i was open with him completely. Trusted him. Love him. I had made him my world and left all my friends. When he dumped me, I had no one. So i rebounded. cried. rebounded. cried. Then realized that everything happens for a reason. In this case, i was a terrible person to him. He brought out the worse in me. He didnt deserve it. Im glad he dumped me, i wouldnt have worked hard to change my ways. He wouldnt have been so happy. Hes the one who got away and I miss him. Will always love him. And I am sorry.


       








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