Searching for "think"

384 Results For 'think'

Lyn

January 23, 2014 @ (New york)

Tags: Bad break up, I still love him, First love

Our relationship was totally unexpected. Last september 2013, a guy that I had a teeny tiny bit of a crush asked me out unexpectedly. No clues, No everything. Out of shock, I started freaking out. I don't know what to do. My mind screamed no, but heart says yes! The reson why i don't want to go on is because im scared of my mom. Like really. She's the definition of a really strict mom. i was scared but then a thought crossed my mind.

Why not accept this? Everything happens for a reason right?

That's when I said Yes. For the first 2 weeks it was amazing. The sparks, the giddy butterflies in my tummy were there until my mom found out about him. It was horrifying. My mom was in range. My mom threatened me to talk to him in school. I was scared. I told her that I promise to break up witj. So I did. I explained to him everything. After a day, things were back together. We decided to mend things back together. I mean we aren't officially dating but you know what I mean? You can sense that something's still going on? Yup, that's it. October came, he stole my first kiss. It was magical. All I could ever think about is that I love him. That everything revolves around him. Its like he's my world. He's my strength yet he is also my weakness. Everything in him is just perfect. The way he surprises me with kisses.. The way he brought Gatorade just for me (Gatorade is my favorite drink, i just love that shit lol)
It was perfect. Everything was perfect. There are even times when he makes silly jokes or I took glances at him in class and im like 'shit, I love this guy' I was soo inlove. It was just.. Perfect. I never been so happy in my life. Everytime I woke up he's all I ever think about. He's cute 'Good Morning's'.. It made me cry, thinking about all those happy memories.
When christmas break came, he told me that his wifi router got broken.. Me, being the understanding girl that I am, understands him. I told him it was okay that he shouldn't worry about me.

(We talk and chat in Kik. We can't text since my mom checks my phone all the time)

One time, back at christmas break.. I was looking at my chat box in facebook but Something totally made me stop in my tracks. He was online. And he was usinh he's phone. I messaged him, i did everything but noo, he wouldn't reply anymore.. I don't know why. Christmas eve came, I kept on looking at my phone hoping that maybe he'd greet me a merry christmas but no, nothing came. It broke my heart. But one thing crossed my mind. I was like 'oh maybe he's wifi router is still destroyed'

New year came, I was waiting. Waiting for him to atleast greet me but no, nothing still came. It hurt me. It Crushed me .. to millions of pieces. But there's one thing that made me ball my eyes out.. He's close friend messaged me in facebook. He's like;

Happy new year __ ! How are you and him? I hope that this year is going to be a big blast for both of you. Best wishes. Haha don't forget im one of your #1 Fans of LYN! hahaha cx

That totally made me cry. I mean out of everything why that? Why his friend.? Its really heartbreaking to know that he's friend greeted me, while him? No. There was no effort. It crushed me. The way his friend says he want us to be good this year. It break me.

School came along, i tried not to approch him. Waiting for him to atleast apologize or say Hi, or ask me how my christmas break went but nothing. He never did. It crushed me. The next day, I tried talking to him but he was distant like he really is. He's bestfriend approached me and told me he wanted to talk. I listened. He's bestfriend told me the truth. He met a girl back at christmas break. He went to the movies with her and ate in a restaurant. It killed me. I was paralyzed in my seat. My breathing hitched. My face paled. My mind went blank. I felt like crying but my tears wouldn't fall. My eyes feel numb. My skin is on fire. I feel like someone just throwed me a bucket of lava. Just like that. It crushed me. I've lost weight. Im not the happy girl like before. Every recess or lunch, I don't mingle with my friends anymore. I just stay in the classroom, facing the wall, got my phone out and stay there till' its over. It crushed me. I'm not the bubble person that I am before. But you know what hurt me the most? He acted as if I never exist. It was like I was invinsible. That he couldn't see me. Just like that. There are times that I break down in class. I just couldn't help it. He looks soo happy without me. Huge smile in his face. And well, I also think that he has a crush on this girl.. He craves for her attention. He sits with her all the time in class. He talk about her all the time. I don't know what to do. Its killing me since we are classmates. I could see him everyday. Its hard to ignore him. It really is. It broke my heart. he is the love of my life. He's my everything. He's the only reason why I smile. Its hard. I mean he is after all my first love. My first ever boyfriend. My first kiss. It hurt me to know that another that I love, would leave me again. Like my dad. He left me. I mean sure, I got to see him and everything but it isn't like before. My dad has another daugther who is my half sister. My dad loves her so much. He wouldn't even bother to talk to me anymore. He wouldn't crave for our communication. When me and my dad's girlfriend fight, he always take her side. It kills me. Another guy who I love would leave me again. Wow, What did I do to deserve this? It kills me. Its almost a month now but im still not over him. He's all I could ever think about. I don't know what to do. I want the real me to be back again, but it wouldn't. Its hard to smile. He looks soo soo happy without me. It break me into millions of pieces. It made me realize that love is shitload of bullshit. I honestly don't believe in love anymore. I mean why? No matter how loving or caring that person is to you, they will break you in the end. Those people out there that are experiencing heartbreak, don't worry. Your not the only one. Im trying my hardest to stay strong. Let's just believe in ourself, have faith in God. And never say never

Varun

January 23, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: Selfish

Once which was the truth for us ,prooved to be just a dream and a requirement for the moment. Love was treated as a step of going up by her. I held strong for around 3 years but i could not take the disrespect of me and my life. Once a Icon in her life is now just a piece of shit. This was told to me by all my close ones. I was taken apart from my family, my friends. I just cant take it more. I am not a fake person, all i am is a guy who thinks this world needs more love and having said that i was in a relation with the person with the exact opposite. though. Today after a lot of mental trauma i end this relation from my end,for i know she will be fine now . I am not surprised that there is not any resentment from her today and she is fine for me to be not around. Last Statement" I was always unhappy with u for the time you and i have been together"

Jake

January 20, 2014 @ (Illinois )

Tags: Break up

So I fell in love with this girl starting my freshmen year of high school. We were so happy together, she lives only lives 5 blocks away from me. We became best friends, and we promised each other that we would be high school sweet hearts and never leave each other. We dated all through high school for two and a half years. Starting my Senior year we started to be a little distance from each other. We started having a few problems and soon enough she broke up with me. The person a took for granted and thought would never leave, finally did it. I always thought we would keep those promises and be high school sweet hearts. We spent every day together and we never had a dull moment. She was the love of my life and I still can't seem to move on or run away from all this. I just want every little thing back. It's just so hard to get over somebody so if you're out there struggling you're not the only I promise. I think about this girl everyday and pray that one we'll get back together even though we're graduating here in May. But may god bless us with somebody here in the near future.

Emily

January 07, 2014 @ (usa)

Tags: bad break up

We started dating last year, everything was perfect. He was my everything, my first love, and he made me the happiest girl in the world. I was so proud to call him mine and everything was amazing. We never fought, we made each other laugh all the time and there was never a dry moment. We got along so well and every day I loved him more and more. We saw each other every day last summer and we were both sad because in August we would be going our separate ways for college. We spent so much time together in July and August and we both loved each other so much. I truly believed he was the love of my life and that we were meant to be and he thought the same. We swore our love forever to each other the day I left for college and I really believed the distance wouldn't hurt our strong relationship. After a few weeks in college it was clear we were becoming kind of distant. I was so sad because I put him over almost everything and i tried to talk to him and tell him I was thinking about him all the time, but I felt like I never received anything in return. I felt unappreciated and kind of worthless to him. I saw him a few times and he didn't even seem sad to say bye to me. It seemed like he had completely moved on with his life and forgotten about me. He insisted that he still loved me but was just really busy, and I believed him. He always talked about this other girl but said they were just really good friends. I was suspicious that they were maybe more than friends but I didn't do anything about it because I didn't believe he could do anything like that to me. He would always hang out with this girl and I would see pictures of them together and it made it seem like my worst fears were coming true.. he was falling for another girl behind my back. I tried talking about this other girl and our relationship and i told him i felt kind of neglected, but he said I was breaking his heart and I mistakingly said I made a mistake and didn't know he still loved me so much. We continued to talk but he rarely did anything to make me smile or make me happy. I felt like I wasn't talking to the guy i loved. I saw him over holiday break and after spending a few wonderful days with him he told me he liked this other guy. "I like him, but I love you," he told me. It was probably the worst thing I've ever been told in my entire life. We had spent the whole week mending our relationship and being happy together, only for him to drop this horrible news on me at the end of the break. I then made the biggest mistake of my life, I continued to spend the rest of the weekend with him and act like things were okay. He had me under his spell and was playing and manipulating me. I knew I had to break up with him, I wasn't going to be his back up in case things with this new girl didn't work. He clearly didn't know what "love" meant and was deceiving me the whole time. My gut feeling knew he liked this other girl I just didn't want to believe it. About a year after we fell for each other, I broke up with him after the weekend was over. It was so difficult I cried every night. I still think about him every single day, but I knew I didn't deserve to be treated like that and in time i'll find someone better.

Free

December 21, 2013 @ (Michigan)

Tags: Bad breakup

Last summer I met a guy in my office..he was kind, handsome, funny and shy. We became friends and i fell for him. On 8th June we kissed and started our relationship. He was my everything and i loved him more than anything in this world. I used to dream about marring him and did every possible thing to make him happy. We even talked about getting married and having kids. I used to think he loves me dearly and cannot stay without me. Then suddenly after 18 months of relationship he says he never loved me and was acting the whole time. I was devastated, could not eat, sleep or work. I would go to office and cry hysterically in office bathroom . Its been 1 month he broke up with me and right now i am feeling little better. He did not even try to find out how i am doing..He moved on very quickly. But Its fine.. right now i really don't care..now when i think, he was not a good bf atall..he insulted me million times i listened to them happily. Well I might not love anybody the way i loved him, i might not be free with anybody the way I was with him, there is a big hole in my heart which may never ever heal..but its fine.. life moves on and i am moving forward with it :)

123

December 21, 2013 @ (uk)

Tags: heartbreak bad break up

So this summer I went on a language course in valencia. And on my last night i met this beautiful polish girl. The school I was going to had arranged a dinner and I wanted to sit with all my friends but the only space was next to her, who I had previously not met. Anyway, we started talking and got on really well all through the evening, at the start I didnt think she liked me but I realized she did when I kept catching her looking at me when my head was turned away. The next day I came back to UK and we started talking loads on facebook and skype. Skyping her was always the best part of my day. We spoke for about three weeks like that all the time her saying yeh you should come see me in poland ! So i thought about it and eventually got round to booking my tickets and eventually went to see her for a weekend. We had the best weekend ever and got on amazingly well, slept together every night and talked about how much we liked each other and how cute we were and how amazing this whole situation was. She said she had not felt like this with anyone for a really long time and that she felt so comfortable with me which was weird as it usually takes her much longer to get so comfy and like someone so much. She was basically the first proper girl I had done anything like this with, so it made me feel really good and she said how special I made her feel and how I gave her shivers down her spine. Basically, I was head over heals for her and she genuinely seemed to like me as much as I liked her. I came back and a few days after we skyped and I bought my tickets to go back in about a month and a half's time. The first few weeks were fine, although I missed her loads and thought about her all the time we spoke loads and she always said how much she couldn't wait to see me and that she adored me and that she wanted me and how much she wanted to kiss me and hug me etc, considering this was my first girl I was basically in this amazing haze of happiness, everything just felt so good. But as time went on I think we both began to realize the reality of the situation. Neither of us wanted anything serious or it to be more than a bit of fun, but at the same time I think she fell for me as much as I did her. We began to text a bit less as she got busier and things started to slow down, and even skyping wasn't so great anymore. One night we skyped and I told her that I didn't think things were going to work out well and that there was no way that they could and that the whole situation was a bit stupid. The next week was terrible we barely spoke and when we did it was awkward. The more I thought about it that more things didn't make sense espeically as we weren't even properly going out or together or anything. I did try to hold thingks on since I had already bought my dam tickets but she began to be really cold and distant and said she had been on dates with some guy, which although we did agree was fine that if we see someone we like we should go for it, although it did make me feel like shit as she knew i had bought my tickets to go there in just a few weeks time. It eventually ended when she told me she was seeing some guy and that we could only be friends if I came to see her, and that it wasn't the fact she was seeing someone else it was the fact its too difficult to maintain anything even though everything she said was true. Although I understood and knew deep down it was always going to end badly, I still felt terrible as it was a week before I was meant to go and I thought it was bad how she started seeing someone knowing I had booked everything and more that she accused me of becoming too attached, when she had told me all this stuff and that it was true...I will never understand why she couldn't see that. I haven't spoken to her since and don't intend to, but it really sucked at the time, cried for three days straight and generally just felt completely empty and destroyed and completely unhappy and without meaning or drive. Although we werent official or anything it still sucked, but it does feel good to get it off my chest ! word of warning, the first experience with a girl / women will never end well, beware that they also can say shit and then the complete opposite a few days later....definitely scared of getting involved with anyone else for the time being !

Broken Hearted Girl...

December 19, 2013 @ (Philadelphia )

Tags: Sad

When I first saw him I was stunned he was so sexy and tall with braids .... we starting talking but then something stupid happened and we stopped. We wound up in the same school and started talking again then eventually dating ... I knew instantly he was someone special .. we soon fell in love and things were going well ... but he had many secrets and he lied multiple times .... over and over and over ... he still thinks to this day that I believe all the lies he too but I just let him believe .. so we were on and off and I just kept going back because I really love him ... but I guess it just wasn't ment to be :( I still love him to this day but we don't really talk any more .. I git kicked out of my school so I don't see him any more ... it hurts really badly and I want him back ... I don't understand why though ... I want to know how he feels ... or at least how he felt ... I wish he knew :(

Waited All That Time For Nothing!

December 16, 2013 @ (Chicago)

Tags: bad break up, ugh, in love, crying

So. I had a thing with this guy. He is three years older than me and we started dating when I was 16. I immediately fell for him after our first date. He was everything I was looking for in a guy, and I could already tell that he was special. We had been dating for 2 months when he had gotten a new job and had to move out of state. I thought it was the end of us but we still managed to carry on for two more months. He was only 2 hours away so he came back about once a week. But then things started to get ugly, he stopped texting me and eventually said things weren't going to work out because he didn't want to keep me on the hook and he didn't see himself moving back home. So I went for a month without him, crying every single day. For some reason I had this gut feeling that things were going to work out, but I thought it was ridiculous so I tried to ignore it. But out of the blue, he texted me again and we began to see each other every time he came back. We were inseperable and we truly fell in love with eachother. He was trying to transfer to a store back home and for months and months he couldn't. But finally, after 9 months he did and we were both ecstatic. But in the weeks leading to his return I had a sinking feeling that I couldn't explain. 3 days after he got back, he broke up with me, saying he still wouldn't be able to give me adequate attention and that I should find someone better. He wasn't even willing to try to make it work for a month. I don't think that was the real reason.

Isabella

December 03, 2013 @ (New york)

Tags: Ugh

I need to vent. In advance, thanks for reading.

He is the last person I thought I'd be crying over. I had just moved and was new in school - it was a smallish town and there wasn't really that many new kids. So everybody was introducing me to everybody. Cutting class with a friend walking around, a group of guys walk up to my friend and he starts talking to them and what not and introduce me to them. I could tell that they are older -some a lot older- I don't even think they went to my school. One of them, Drew, stayed behind everyone with me as we all walked on the narrow sidewalk. We talked briefly I learned he was also cutting, he was some what of a "bad" boy he would always be getting in trouble and smoking weed and all that. My first impression of him was he's cool, he's like me and he's cute! But I never pursued him neither did he with me. I just saw him as a friend. Yeah he's cute but I didn't feel anything towards him. He'd always greet me with a hug and a kiss on the cheek every time and wait for me by my class. I saw him in and out relationships and when one got kinda serious I actually got upset! But not enough to really care and got over it almost right away. His best friend had a thing for me and I let it slide but felt really uncomfortable cause I didn't want drew to find out. I met him in 08 and the years passed and our friendship was just that - a friendship. We didn't become best friends and start dating we didn't have any of that fair tale crap.

Since he was older he left school before I did and after that I barely saw him. In all honesty I didn't really care, he was my friend but just my friend and it wasn't such a tragic thing when we stopped talking. I was on my Facebook and I came across one of his exs and she was getting married! I thought it was to him but then saw that it was to someone else. In my head I thought to myself why do I care? Whatever, right? So I looked him up and we started talking again and catching up and exchanging numbers. He lived close by and he had a car so he was literally only 5 minutes away. He grew to be even more handsome than I remember. And I'm not your typical girl - I'd rather take apart a car engine than get my nails

Mae

December 03, 2013 @ (maryland)

Tags: Bad break up, horrible boyfriend, cheater

So at this point I had been single for a little over a year. I was having a blast and really wasn't looking for a relationship. I had recently become friends with one of my best guy friends girlfriends. They broke and we decided to remain friends. We went out for girls night a few times before, and one night we decided to go over to the next county and bar hop a little. I had just turned 21 so this world was new to me. We went to this biker bar full of people considerably older than us, but we made the best of it and had a few drinks. Then her friends call her that are at a bar near by. We go over there and most of the guys in the bar are friends with her and she had known them since high school. She introduced me to most of them and I really wasn't interested in any of them. The we go to the other side of the bar and there is a group of guys just talking and we walk up to them. Apparently she was friends with them too. She walks away and immediately one of them starts to talk to me. "Hey i've never seen you before, where are you from?" he says and I respond " well I've never seen you either, and i'm from the county over. " " so am, whats your name" he says "Mae" I replied. "I'm Mike, I think I like you already." Then proceeds to put his arm around me and kisses me on the cheek. Naturally, I'm like dude you're too close. Then he bought me a drink and we talked a little. He liked that I was short, and that I had tattoos. I didn't look like your average girl next door. When they call last call he asks me to come home with him, but I said no. He then asked if he could drive me to my car back in our county at least. I agreed. I never usually click with people in general, especially this fast. We got to my car and talked for hours. We exchanged numbers and were basically stuck to each other the rest of the summer. When we met he told me he was going away to grad school and I thought we could just have a summer thing. But by the end of the summer, he was telling me he wanted to keep what we had going while he was away and I agreed. We stayed together for the next year and a half. In that time he had told me many many times he wanted to be with me forever, that he couldn't wait to spend the rest of our lives together, he loved me more than anything, we were going to move in together when he moved back from school ect. Our relationship seemed as serious and as perfect as you could want with someone you feel like you love more than life itself. Everything seemed very mutual.When we were together it was like nothing I have ever experienced. I felt like I had never loved anyone before he came along. He was in my eyes amazing. He constantly told me how much I was perfect for him and that he was all mine. Then one day in october, My older sister decided to look him up on facebook. All this time he had told me he didn't have a facebook. I'm not the paranoid type so I just never thought anything of it. Turns out he blocked me and anyone he knew was close to me. He didn't realize my sister had a different last name than I had. He had a serious girlfriend where he lived, and had been together for a year and a half before he met me. Then when I confronted him about it, he begged me not to tell her. She was who he really wanted to be with and he led me on knowing he was never going to fulfill any of his promises. Our whole relationship was a lie.