Searching for "think"

386 Results For 'think'

Brooke

January 30, 2014 @ (Carlsbad, CA)

Tags: Bet, In Love, Young, Naive, High School, Virginity, Fake Friends, Bad People

So, I'm eighteen now but I'm going to rewind a year to my sophomore year..

~2 YEARS AGO~

When I was 16 I moved to California from Atlanta.. When I got here I was well known because of my skin color and my suprising hair length.. I got some secret admirers during the first few months and some not so secret admirers.. For the most part I had a very small group of girl friends but a large group of acquaintances.. Everyone I knew I was introduced to by one of my friends.. I was invited to a party about a month after I arrived by one of my friends (let's call her Becca). So Becca introduced me to three guys at the party (Let's call them Luke, Nate, and Daniel). So Luke and I really hit it off and we started to hang out.. Everywhere Becca took me Luke was there.. After another month of us hanging out we officially started dating.. He was so sweet to me and I remember always thinking.. 'I'm so in love with this guy'.. We spent every moment together and he treated me so well.. When I got a job at this tanning spa he would always bring me food and gifts.. After another month of this he started to disappear.. I wasn't really worried about it at the time because I was a dumb love-struck child.. After a few weeks of absence with only phone calls he reappeared and his charm was in over-drive.. Around this time rumors started floating around school that I was a slut and all that shit and that Luke got me pregnant.. I asked him about it and he just insisted that they were jealous and told me he loved me.. He told me this every day five times a day almost for the next three weeks.. And then he proposed... (Yes, he proposed to me at 16.. And my dumb ass said 'yes') Welp.. I lost my virginity that night.. (Don't judge me.. He's a con-artist) And the gifts, the visits, the 'I love you's, the calls, everything.. Stopped. I was still infatuated with him and I refused to believe he used me.. He never proposed with a ring which should've told me that he wasn't serious but I thought him saying 'I love you' was good enough.. The rumors at school got worse in his absence and I heard an interesting theory swirling around.. It was a bet. I refused to believe it at first until I decided to ask Becca about it.. She just cried and cried and cried.. She kept telling me she was sorry and she didn't know he would actually do it.. Turns out my 'friends' Nate and Daniel bet Luke $200 dollars that he couldn't take my virginity before the year was up.. TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS IS WHAT MY VIRTUE MEANT TO THEM!! Luke came back to school a month later and acted as if I was invisible.. I stopped talking to all my friends and found a new group.. I confronted Luke a week later and he said he just fell out of love and the bet never existed which I know is bullshit because he somehow got a new paintjob for his car.. I didn't cry.. I wasn't sad.. I was pissed beyond words.. He dismissed me so easily after he took something that was meant for my husband.. I could've hurt him as easily.. I thought about slashing his tires or something like that but in the long run I didn't do anything that could get me in trouble.. I let it go. It's been two years since then and I have a new boyfriend.. His name is Chris! I love him sooo much and unlike Luke we're taking it slow because we both know what it's like to get hurt.. I've spoken to Luke once since the confrontation and that was to curse him out and vent a little bit.. Which ultimately ended in him walking away and me slapping him.. I hope Luke finds someone good so that when he does some shit like that to her and she leaves he'll know how other people feel when he mistreats them.. Chris and I are in love.. And I'm sure this time because it feels different than the love I had for Luke.. It feels natural.. I guess I felt strained in my relationship with Luke without realizing it because I had nothing to compare it to.. Just in case you were wondering.. Yes. My parents know what Luke did to me and his parents know too.. I'm not going to share what happened because that's between our families but I'll tell you Luke owes my family a lot of money.. This experience has made me stronger in more ways than one and more alert.. Before you judge me you have to remember I was naive and sixteen.. With college time nearing and my upcoming move to L.A. with Chris I can let go of all the scars that my move to California gave me because I got lots of opportunities too! If anything like this happens to you know that there is light at the end of the tunnel.. I found my light! This is for the girls.. Save your V-Card.. You only have one and make sure it counts and he really deserves it.. I made the fatal mistake to give it to someone who saw it is nothing more than a bet and hasn't even apologized.. I hope you learned something from my mistake.. Byeeee!

Beckaah

January 27, 2014 @ (NZ)

Tags: confusing breakup

I met a guy on Tinder (yeah, i know that should have been alarm bells from the start). I'd been trying not to encourage him too much as I'd had a really bad relationship in the past which had caused me to have serious trust issues. I told him I just wanted to be friends, and thinking that he would be like most tinder guys and would bugger off as soon as he heard that, I didn't think it would go anywhere. But he was so persistent, and he would message me everyday, and after a few weeks we exchanged numbers and were soon texting every day. I looked forward to those texts because he was a really sweet guy and seemed to be able to cheer me up when I was having a bad day. Finally, I agreed to meet him, and it turned out that we actually had a lot in common, and we got on really well. Then a week later he asked me to be his girlfriend. I wasn't too sure as I didn't know a lot about him, but I knew I really liked him so I decided to go with it and see where it ended up. He went away over christmas for 3 weeks, but we still texted every day, and then he came back and was all excited to see me. And then the shit hit the fan. I thought he was acting strange, but when I confronted him about it he just said everything was fine and it was all in my head. I saw him last Friday and we had a super cute date, and he told me how special he was and how much he loved me. And then on Saturday morning I woke up to a text saying that I obviously wasn't coping with him never being able to see me, and so the relationship was over. It was the most pathetic excuse he could have used as I'd never ever suggested that in my life. I have my suspicions that he cheated on me but I'll never know for sure. He's now cut me completely out of his life( he deleted me on facebook 10 minutes after he dumped me), and I haven't had any texts from him or anything. I still have some of his stuff which I need to give back to him but he won't even see me long enough to let me do that, despite telling me by text that he does want it back. It feels weird to not have him in my life, as he's been such a big part of it for the last 3 months, but I kind of feel like it's for the best. I just miss my good morning beautiful texts that I would get every morning without fail :( I just wish I knew what I did that made this go from being such a happy relationship to such a ruined one

Lyn

January 23, 2014 @ (New york)

Tags: Bad break up, I still love him, First love

Our relationship was totally unexpected. Last september 2013, a guy that I had a teeny tiny bit of a crush asked me out unexpectedly. No clues, No everything. Out of shock, I started freaking out. I don't know what to do. My mind screamed no, but heart says yes! The reson why i don't want to go on is because im scared of my mom. Like really. She's the definition of a really strict mom. i was scared but then a thought crossed my mind.

Why not accept this? Everything happens for a reason right?

That's when I said Yes. For the first 2 weeks it was amazing. The sparks, the giddy butterflies in my tummy were there until my mom found out about him. It was horrifying. My mom was in range. My mom threatened me to talk to him in school. I was scared. I told her that I promise to break up witj. So I did. I explained to him everything. After a day, things were back together. We decided to mend things back together. I mean we aren't officially dating but you know what I mean? You can sense that something's still going on? Yup, that's it. October came, he stole my first kiss. It was magical. All I could ever think about is that I love him. That everything revolves around him. Its like he's my world. He's my strength yet he is also my weakness. Everything in him is just perfect. The way he surprises me with kisses.. The way he brought Gatorade just for me (Gatorade is my favorite drink, i just love that shit lol)
It was perfect. Everything was perfect. There are even times when he makes silly jokes or I took glances at him in class and im like 'shit, I love this guy' I was soo inlove. It was just.. Perfect. I never been so happy in my life. Everytime I woke up he's all I ever think about. He's cute 'Good Morning's'.. It made me cry, thinking about all those happy memories.
When christmas break came, he told me that his wifi router got broken.. Me, being the understanding girl that I am, understands him. I told him it was okay that he shouldn't worry about me.

(We talk and chat in Kik. We can't text since my mom checks my phone all the time)

One time, back at christmas break.. I was looking at my chat box in facebook but Something totally made me stop in my tracks. He was online. And he was usinh he's phone. I messaged him, i did everything but noo, he wouldn't reply anymore.. I don't know why. Christmas eve came, I kept on looking at my phone hoping that maybe he'd greet me a merry christmas but no, nothing came. It broke my heart. But one thing crossed my mind. I was like 'oh maybe he's wifi router is still destroyed'

New year came, I was waiting. Waiting for him to atleast greet me but no, nothing still came. It hurt me. It Crushed me .. to millions of pieces. But there's one thing that made me ball my eyes out.. He's close friend messaged me in facebook. He's like;

Happy new year __ ! How are you and him? I hope that this year is going to be a big blast for both of you. Best wishes. Haha don't forget im one of your #1 Fans of LYN! hahaha cx

That totally made me cry. I mean out of everything why that? Why his friend.? Its really heartbreaking to know that he's friend greeted me, while him? No. There was no effort. It crushed me. The way his friend says he want us to be good this year. It break me.

School came along, i tried not to approch him. Waiting for him to atleast apologize or say Hi, or ask me how my christmas break went but nothing. He never did. It crushed me. The next day, I tried talking to him but he was distant like he really is. He's bestfriend approached me and told me he wanted to talk. I listened. He's bestfriend told me the truth. He met a girl back at christmas break. He went to the movies with her and ate in a restaurant. It killed me. I was paralyzed in my seat. My breathing hitched. My face paled. My mind went blank. I felt like crying but my tears wouldn't fall. My eyes feel numb. My skin is on fire. I feel like someone just throwed me a bucket of lava. Just like that. It crushed me. I've lost weight. Im not the happy girl like before. Every recess or lunch, I don't mingle with my friends anymore. I just stay in the classroom, facing the wall, got my phone out and stay there till' its over. It crushed me. I'm not the bubble person that I am before. But you know what hurt me the most? He acted as if I never exist. It was like I was invinsible. That he couldn't see me. Just like that. There are times that I break down in class. I just couldn't help it. He looks soo happy without me. Huge smile in his face. And well, I also think that he has a crush on this girl.. He craves for her attention. He sits with her all the time in class. He talk about her all the time. I don't know what to do. Its killing me since we are classmates. I could see him everyday. Its hard to ignore him. It really is. It broke my heart. he is the love of my life. He's my everything. He's the only reason why I smile. Its hard. I mean he is after all my first love. My first ever boyfriend. My first kiss. It hurt me to know that another that I love, would leave me again. Like my dad. He left me. I mean sure, I got to see him and everything but it isn't like before. My dad has another daugther who is my half sister. My dad loves her so much. He wouldn't even bother to talk to me anymore. He wouldn't crave for our communication. When me and my dad's girlfriend fight, he always take her side. It kills me. Another guy who I love would leave me again. Wow, What did I do to deserve this? It kills me. Its almost a month now but im still not over him. He's all I could ever think about. I don't know what to do. I want the real me to be back again, but it wouldn't. Its hard to smile. He looks soo soo happy without me. It break me into millions of pieces. It made me realize that love is shitload of bullshit. I honestly don't believe in love anymore. I mean why? No matter how loving or caring that person is to you, they will break you in the end. Those people out there that are experiencing heartbreak, don't worry. Your not the only one. Im trying my hardest to stay strong. Let's just believe in ourself, have faith in God. And never say never

Varun

January 23, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: Selfish

Once which was the truth for us ,prooved to be just a dream and a requirement for the moment. Love was treated as a step of going up by her. I held strong for around 3 years but i could not take the disrespect of me and my life. Once a Icon in her life is now just a piece of shit. This was told to me by all my close ones. I was taken apart from my family, my friends. I just cant take it more. I am not a fake person, all i am is a guy who thinks this world needs more love and having said that i was in a relation with the person with the exact opposite. though. Today after a lot of mental trauma i end this relation from my end,for i know she will be fine now . I am not surprised that there is not any resentment from her today and she is fine for me to be not around. Last Statement" I was always unhappy with u for the time you and i have been together"

Jake

January 20, 2014 @ (Illinois )

Tags: Break up

So I fell in love with this girl starting my freshmen year of high school. We were so happy together, she lives only lives 5 blocks away from me. We became best friends, and we promised each other that we would be high school sweet hearts and never leave each other. We dated all through high school for two and a half years. Starting my Senior year we started to be a little distance from each other. We started having a few problems and soon enough she broke up with me. The person a took for granted and thought would never leave, finally did it. I always thought we would keep those promises and be high school sweet hearts. We spent every day together and we never had a dull moment. She was the love of my life and I still can't seem to move on or run away from all this. I just want every little thing back. It's just so hard to get over somebody so if you're out there struggling you're not the only I promise. I think about this girl everyday and pray that one we'll get back together even though we're graduating here in May. But may god bless us with somebody here in the near future.

Emily

January 07, 2014 @ (usa)

Tags: bad break up

We started dating last year, everything was perfect. He was my everything, my first love, and he made me the happiest girl in the world. I was so proud to call him mine and everything was amazing. We never fought, we made each other laugh all the time and there was never a dry moment. We got along so well and every day I loved him more and more. We saw each other every day last summer and we were both sad because in August we would be going our separate ways for college. We spent so much time together in July and August and we both loved each other so much. I truly believed he was the love of my life and that we were meant to be and he thought the same. We swore our love forever to each other the day I left for college and I really believed the distance wouldn't hurt our strong relationship. After a few weeks in college it was clear we were becoming kind of distant. I was so sad because I put him over almost everything and i tried to talk to him and tell him I was thinking about him all the time, but I felt like I never received anything in return. I felt unappreciated and kind of worthless to him. I saw him a few times and he didn't even seem sad to say bye to me. It seemed like he had completely moved on with his life and forgotten about me. He insisted that he still loved me but was just really busy, and I believed him. He always talked about this other girl but said they were just really good friends. I was suspicious that they were maybe more than friends but I didn't do anything about it because I didn't believe he could do anything like that to me. He would always hang out with this girl and I would see pictures of them together and it made it seem like my worst fears were coming true.. he was falling for another girl behind my back. I tried talking about this other girl and our relationship and i told him i felt kind of neglected, but he said I was breaking his heart and I mistakingly said I made a mistake and didn't know he still loved me so much. We continued to talk but he rarely did anything to make me smile or make me happy. I felt like I wasn't talking to the guy i loved. I saw him over holiday break and after spending a few wonderful days with him he told me he liked this other guy. "I like him, but I love you," he told me. It was probably the worst thing I've ever been told in my entire life. We had spent the whole week mending our relationship and being happy together, only for him to drop this horrible news on me at the end of the break. I then made the biggest mistake of my life, I continued to spend the rest of the weekend with him and act like things were okay. He had me under his spell and was playing and manipulating me. I knew I had to break up with him, I wasn't going to be his back up in case things with this new girl didn't work. He clearly didn't know what "love" meant and was deceiving me the whole time. My gut feeling knew he liked this other girl I just didn't want to believe it. About a year after we fell for each other, I broke up with him after the weekend was over. It was so difficult I cried every night. I still think about him every single day, but I knew I didn't deserve to be treated like that and in time i'll find someone better.

Free

December 21, 2013 @ (Michigan)

Tags: Bad breakup

Last summer I met a guy in my office..he was kind, handsome, funny and shy. We became friends and i fell for him. On 8th June we kissed and started our relationship. He was my everything and i loved him more than anything in this world. I used to dream about marring him and did every possible thing to make him happy. We even talked about getting married and having kids. I used to think he loves me dearly and cannot stay without me. Then suddenly after 18 months of relationship he says he never loved me and was acting the whole time. I was devastated, could not eat, sleep or work. I would go to office and cry hysterically in office bathroom . Its been 1 month he broke up with me and right now i am feeling little better. He did not even try to find out how i am doing..He moved on very quickly. But Its fine.. right now i really don't care..now when i think, he was not a good bf atall..he insulted me million times i listened to them happily. Well I might not love anybody the way i loved him, i might not be free with anybody the way I was with him, there is a big hole in my heart which may never ever heal..but its fine.. life moves on and i am moving forward with it :)

123

December 21, 2013 @ (uk)

Tags: heartbreak bad break up

So this summer I went on a language course in valencia. And on my last night i met this beautiful polish girl. The school I was going to had arranged a dinner and I wanted to sit with all my friends but the only space was next to her, who I had previously not met. Anyway, we started talking and got on really well all through the evening, at the start I didnt think she liked me but I realized she did when I kept catching her looking at me when my head was turned away. The next day I came back to UK and we started talking loads on facebook and skype. Skyping her was always the best part of my day. We spoke for about three weeks like that all the time her saying yeh you should come see me in poland ! So i thought about it and eventually got round to booking my tickets and eventually went to see her for a weekend. We had the best weekend ever and got on amazingly well, slept together every night and talked about how much we liked each other and how cute we were and how amazing this whole situation was. She said she had not felt like this with anyone for a really long time and that she felt so comfortable with me which was weird as it usually takes her much longer to get so comfy and like someone so much. She was basically the first proper girl I had done anything like this with, so it made me feel really good and she said how special I made her feel and how I gave her shivers down her spine. Basically, I was head over heals for her and she genuinely seemed to like me as much as I liked her. I came back and a few days after we skyped and I bought my tickets to go back in about a month and a half's time. The first few weeks were fine, although I missed her loads and thought about her all the time we spoke loads and she always said how much she couldn't wait to see me and that she adored me and that she wanted me and how much she wanted to kiss me and hug me etc, considering this was my first girl I was basically in this amazing haze of happiness, everything just felt so good. But as time went on I think we both began to realize the reality of the situation. Neither of us wanted anything serious or it to be more than a bit of fun, but at the same time I think she fell for me as much as I did her. We began to text a bit less as she got busier and things started to slow down, and even skyping wasn't so great anymore. One night we skyped and I told her that I didn't think things were going to work out well and that there was no way that they could and that the whole situation was a bit stupid. The next week was terrible we barely spoke and when we did it was awkward. The more I thought about it that more things didn't make sense espeically as we weren't even properly going out or together or anything. I did try to hold thingks on since I had already bought my dam tickets but she began to be really cold and distant and said she had been on dates with some guy, which although we did agree was fine that if we see someone we like we should go for it, although it did make me feel like shit as she knew i had bought my tickets to go there in just a few weeks time. It eventually ended when she told me she was seeing some guy and that we could only be friends if I came to see her, and that it wasn't the fact she was seeing someone else it was the fact its too difficult to maintain anything even though everything she said was true. Although I understood and knew deep down it was always going to end badly, I still felt terrible as it was a week before I was meant to go and I thought it was bad how she started seeing someone knowing I had booked everything and more that she accused me of becoming too attached, when she had told me all this stuff and that it was true...I will never understand why she couldn't see that. I haven't spoken to her since and don't intend to, but it really sucked at the time, cried for three days straight and generally just felt completely empty and destroyed and completely unhappy and without meaning or drive. Although we werent official or anything it still sucked, but it does feel good to get it off my chest ! word of warning, the first experience with a girl / women will never end well, beware that they also can say shit and then the complete opposite a few days later....definitely scared of getting involved with anyone else for the time being !

Broken Hearted Girl...

December 19, 2013 @ (Philadelphia )

Tags: Sad

When I first saw him I was stunned he was so sexy and tall with braids .... we starting talking but then something stupid happened and we stopped. We wound up in the same school and started talking again then eventually dating ... I knew instantly he was someone special .. we soon fell in love and things were going well ... but he had many secrets and he lied multiple times .... over and over and over ... he still thinks to this day that I believe all the lies he too but I just let him believe .. so we were on and off and I just kept going back because I really love him ... but I guess it just wasn't ment to be :( I still love him to this day but we don't really talk any more .. I git kicked out of my school so I don't see him any more ... it hurts really badly and I want him back ... I don't understand why though ... I want to know how he feels ... or at least how he felt ... I wish he knew :(

Waited All That Time For Nothing!

December 16, 2013 @ (Chicago)

Tags: bad break up, ugh, in love, crying

So. I had a thing with this guy. He is three years older than me and we started dating when I was 16. I immediately fell for him after our first date. He was everything I was looking for in a guy, and I could already tell that he was special. We had been dating for 2 months when he had gotten a new job and had to move out of state. I thought it was the end of us but we still managed to carry on for two more months. He was only 2 hours away so he came back about once a week. But then things started to get ugly, he stopped texting me and eventually said things weren't going to work out because he didn't want to keep me on the hook and he didn't see himself moving back home. So I went for a month without him, crying every single day. For some reason I had this gut feeling that things were going to work out, but I thought it was ridiculous so I tried to ignore it. But out of the blue, he texted me again and we began to see each other every time he came back. We were inseperable and we truly fell in love with eachother. He was trying to transfer to a store back home and for months and months he couldn't. But finally, after 9 months he did and we were both ecstatic. But in the weeks leading to his return I had a sinking feeling that I couldn't explain. 3 days after he got back, he broke up with me, saying he still wouldn't be able to give me adequate attention and that I should find someone better. He wasn't even willing to try to make it work for a month. I don't think that was the real reason.