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The Unstable Entrepenour

November 21, 2016 @ (United States)

I remember that it hurt. Hearing the words hurt - and at the same time, it felt like something out of a movie, like it wasn't happening. After all, how could it? It had been merely a week since our second anniversary, and as an anniversary gift she had given me a card that said, "I promise to be with you for all the years to come."
I couldn't even begin to process it. "How do you feel," she asks me, trying to decipher my off smile and my wondering eyes. I only smile because I don't know what to say, what to feel. I don't fight it, I merely say all-right, shed a couple tears, and drop her off at her house. It took me a couple days for my emotions to catch up with me - and oh boy, did they come in force. Like a thousand crashing waves, every single negative emotion in the book comes, all at once, all clamoring for my attention in a sea of deprecating voices: "you weren't enough," "she got tired of you," "you aren't good enough for anyone" ; and as I struggle to get them in check, I was still left wondering: why exactly did it happen?
I never got a straight answer to that question; at least, none that I understood. She mentioned that she wanted to try being with a girl (she's bi, but not in practice yet), that I had been insensitive about one fight that we had more than a year ago, that I was too unstable in my life for her to think about settling down with me. "If my ex had asked me to move in with him, I would've done it in an instant" she said. Surprisingly enough, her life wasn't in any way better than mine: a education major working as a cashier at one of the lowest paying grocery shops in the area, with no car telling me, a computer engineering major with a car, and a delivery job earning 2.5x more per hour as her.
While I could see how she was right, since I had been thinking about dropping out of school, and I had changed my major more than three times in the last six months, I just didn't understand why that was an issue now, all of a sudden. The only answer I can come up with is that perhaps the spark, that magical, elusive feeling that binds people together just died over time for her, while mine grew stronger and stronger. While she was thinking about how to break the news to me, I was thinking what would be the best date to travel to Disneyland with her, since she had told me not too long before, that she'd like me to propose to her at the Cinderella Castle.
I write this now, two months later, even thought it feels like a lifetime ago. My speculating and unstableness paid off after all; because I was willing to take risks, I dropped out of school, and started working in Real Estate. In the first month, I rose from Intern to District Manager at a local firm, and when some shady situations came to light regarding the owners, I left the firm, and opened my own. I'm earning four times what I was before, and it'll only grow from here. Even so, I still look back and wonder what could've been. When she ended things, it felt like someone had taken a hammer to the glass sculpture that was my future with her; and even though I'm not crying over it anymore, I have yet to pick up the pieces, and start again.

-E

November 16, 2016 @ (UK)

Tags: bad break up, I still like her

Right,so we dated for slightly over 4 months(short time,I know) but never the less I still extremely loved her,and still do.Our relationship gave no signs of falling apart,at least not any that I could see.We were your typical teenagers in love.Always by each others sides.Holding hand.Constantly texting each other. Every time I spent time with her,I was able to forget all my worries and I finally understood what that cliche about love meant.Everything just seemed so perfect.I loved her and she loved me,but things began going wrong.Because of me.All because of me I lost the one person that really made me feel alive.Made me feel like there was a point to waking up in the morning.Let's call her CC.CC was very easily jealous over my female best friend R.I have a long history with R.R always seemed to support me emotionally and never really gave any inclination that she was romantically attracted to me.Further more,me and R were and still are physically close.Whilst dating CC I would hold hands with R which would clearly upset CC.And me,being the douche i am,never done anything about it.I continued treating CC like second place and never giving her the love she deserved.On a side note,me and R(my female best friend) never done anything except holding hands and hugging,I did most certainly not cheat on CC.Fast forward a couple months,and we would avoid each other and act as if we were almost strangers. Every time we accidentally came in contact with each other we both acted as if we were being branded with a hot rod of iron.This continued for a week until we had an argument over text.Both of us were being passive aggressive but i was obviously the one who started the whole argument.And then we decided to take a break from each other. For a week we still texted.Not much seemed to have changed except our texts seemed so much more wary and cautious.Then on top of that,DD lets call them that ,texted me saying i was being bordeline mentally abusive to CC and that i was manipulative in the relationship.DD was very close to my CC.Anyway lets leave all that out and skip to the juicy bits you all want to hear.2 weeks after our break,she stops texting me entirely.Stops talking to me and avoids me. Doesn't even make eye contact from me.Then on the day we would have had our 5 month anniversary,I see her with hickeys on her neck from DD.CC has stopped caring about me entirely that's for sure...I still think about her.I still love her.I start crying whenever i think back onto memories I have shared with her.How warm her embrace felt.How her hand felt against mine.How I just enjoyed being in her company,just lying down and staring at her in silence. Savouring ever second I got to spend time with her.I have to let go now.I'm finding it hard to.Her.Her.Her.It's a chant inside my head and my heart.I love her and I hate what it does to me.

CM

November 05, 2016 @ (Around)

Tags: Dishonesty, FOMO, boysareajoke

About a year and two months dating, my boyfriend broke up with me.. saying he couldnt do long distance anymore. I had only moved away 3 months prior due to family changes and school etc. He said he was still in-love with me and that we could be together once i moved back in a few years. The day after he had a new girlfriend, in which i realized thanks to facebook. I was heartbroken, and when i asked him if it was true he told me it was a dareâ€ and they had to wait a week before taking it down from facebook. I then later found out it wasnt a dare, he had just lied about that. The best part was finding out they had sex 3 days after being together and he broke up with her the day after and asked to be back together with me.

Sophia Styles

November 03, 2016 @ (San Antonio)

Tags: Dishonesty, lack of communication, fear of commitment

I met him at a party in December 2015. It was obvious that we were both attracted to each other and we started dating straight away. On our first date he tells me he loves me, that freaked me out and I saw it as a red flag, but decided to dodge the bullet to give him a chance. Being with him was amazing since I loved spending time with him, but we barely ever saw each other. We only saw each other twice a month for 1 hour or 2. I wanted to see him more than that since we only lived 30 mins apart. I told him that, but it never happened.

Last month he broke up with me because his feelings weren't as strong as mine and his feelings were diminishing. He never communicated this to me at the time and instead he repressed this since he wanted to still be with me, so he pretended like everything was ok and was telling me how he loves me and misses me when he wasn't feeling it. That made me feel like the past few months was all a farce and was leading me on. The fact that he wasn't honest with me is what hurts the most.

A few months later he still wants me around since he is inviting me to events, so I am left being really confused.

Patricia

October 25, 2016 @ (1311 willingham drive)

Tags: bad, upsetting

so me and him kinda was dating..rn im in pain im more depressed then before...so freshmen year i started liking him never talked to him till my 10th gr year which is rn im a 10th grader and he is a senior..so he talked to me thats how it started we got to know each other more and more and then we started with kissing each other hugging holding hands taking pictures together matching etc...he would write me these love letters i still got them although wen i reread them im always breaking down into tears...he asked me to homecoming we went we had a whole argument he was being mean and i was acting up bcus i started feeling depressed i didnt tell him bcus i didnt wanna ruin our special night but he even told me i did ruin it and i was sorry for being a bitch to him bcus of my depression.so we talked still we werent official even tho i had been wanting to b with him since last year..we had our first slow dance and my god i sung to him it was real special to me i was really happy..he made me real happy he made me feel special and i loved his personality and i started falling for him...i fell so hard that i considered him as my bf to my friends and me and him laughed and did lots together he would give me piggy ride backs and hickies and every time we met after every class and wallked each other to class and i appreciated him i gave him my devotion i gave him everything i had i did everything for him i did what i could to make him happy and i gave him all my support i motivated him to b a better person to do good in skool and b someone in life i believed in him.ppl kept telling me shit about him i didnt wanna believe them bcus i trusted him but all this time he was stabbing me on the bac and did hurtful shit to me it hurt me but i still stayed with him i stayed after he had hurt me i kept forgiving him time after time he kept fucking up and he promised he wasnt gunna fuc up and he did multiple times and i forgave him all the time..then he was telling me he loved me and shit and how he missed me and that he was loyal to me wen wasnt he was having me looking stupid out here wen i was defendin him and believing all his lies..

Dada

October 19, 2016 @ (Canada)

Tags: my fault, i\'m sorry

So there are all of these "my boyfriend did something to me" but this time its a little different, its actually me that did something not very cool to my boyfriend and I totally regret it! It all happened on THAT day, at my friend's uncle small cinema ( about 30-40 places). My friend told me I could bring some friends but only 2-3 since our whole "squad" was there and some other people she knew would come. So I went over there with my boyfriend and his brother and we sat at the complete back of the room, if i remember, we were on the 4th seat from the right side of the alley. So the movie started and my boyfriend went to get something (I don't remember what it was but I think it was food). He left for a good 5 minutes, so I started talking to him (yes i am part of these rude people at the movie theatre) and the more we talked the more I thought he was cute. I then put lip balm on since I am a lip balm addict and I always put some on so his brother told me "you must have very soft lips" and i said "well i guess your brother must be very lucky" and then he said "maybe one day" and I had the great idea of saying "why waiting for some other day when we can do it now" (i know its cheesy) and we kissed... The worst part is that I liked it! When my boyfriend arrived, I bursted in tears and ran to the washroom. I stayed there really long until I finally got out. I told him everything that happened but suprisely he didn't seem to care. I invited for him to break up with me because he did not deserve that but then he said that he wanted to stay with me : "why would I leave you? you like me so much you couldn't hide it from me and you care about me so much that you want me to leave you just because of that." I hugged me and we left the place and went at his house but the only problem and the one thing I didn't tell him was that since the kiss, I developed a small feeling for his brother. At his house, he made a test, he left me in a room with his brother to prove me it was an accident and that he trusted me. Now his brother kissed me and i didn't stop him, i kissed him too, a long and honest kiss. Then my boyfriend didn't trust me anymore... He broke up and we didn't talk anymore. Now its a bit better and we still talk together but not as much as we used to. During 3 months I secretly dated his brother and a few days ago, I told him about it. He was not that mad and he said one sentence I am always going to remember:

- love is like a wild animal, it seems nice but can be dangerous and even if we think we are its friend it will either jump in your face and attack you or run away to someone else's arms. No matter what you do or how you do it, you can't stop someone from loving as long as you can't stop the horse from running.

I dont freakin' know where he got this quote from but I will always remember it! This guy is the sweetest guy ever! he can be so stupid sometimes but is always full of wisdom!!! I really feel sorry and I am really thankful for him understanding my situation!

Dada

October 19, 2016 @ (Canada)

Tags: my fault, i\'m sorry

Jade

October 15, 2016 @ (Louisiana )

Tags: Baby break up

Wish I could make a long story short but I was with my child's father for 3 years he was like first everything , love of my life but little did I know he was cheating on me. It broke my heart cause now I have your baby and it's still not enough to at least you try to make something with with us get your family straight before moving on. So he got me a ring help me get car we took family pictures and everything. While our family picture #the(hislastname)... He then post his new li boo. We technically didn't breakup so I spent months looking for closure. But now I'm in a good place with everything but he stuck on I want him so he choose not to deal with me and my child doesn't even know her dad it's sad but touching he chooses to tend to his life and let his daughter grow in front his eyes. I think out of the whole break up that's the part I won't ever let go of because I know the feeling of growing up with no father but for him to say some of the things he says as mother of his child.. He literally watched me struggle to take care of her , just to see me hurt.. Still wanna know why he is so mad because He cheated and I basically expressed my feelings in messed up ways but I feel as if what's worse the having a baby for somebody who you loved and they never loved you back (let's talk about kick in the face , right)

Broken

October 12, 2016 @ (Australia )

Tags: Badbreakup

We met a year ago, the second I saw him I knew he was going to become a part of my life somehow, I was right 4 months in and we where inseparable, we started living together right away and life was a fairy tale, we would go away on beautiful beach vacations, never running out of things to talk about, or laugh about. We where the same person, we where each other's person, soulmates.

But there was another side to my love story and that was he had a family, I knew he was having problmes with his wife and he told me it was over, he had a two year old who he loved dearly, and ex that I soon learned was pregnant, I was in shock but I loved him so much, I decided at that point I would stick by him as long as he was open and honest and communicated with me every step of the way. That did happen for about 3 months, but then I got pregnant and we decided to abort our child, weeks after that my mind couldn't understand why my soulmate was ok with having kids with someone he didn't even like and with me the idea was so outrageous, at that point he stared hiding calls from his ex and emails and became more and more distant, it all came to a crashing end a month after that. I blocked his phone and cut him off but he creeped back in and I let him not once but twice, the second time he seemed different he told me he saw a shrink, he told me I was his path, his life and no matter what he will never hurt me again, we went away and spent a beautiful weekend together, he reconnected with my family, moved back in, and life seemed normal again, in the. Ack of my mind looking back I was never fully at ease, I was scared and my institution was right, just two weeks after hat beautiful getaway he started acting different again, not open, changing plans, but this time I tried fighting for it, how could this be happening again? I asked my self, not wanting to believe it, but it all came crashing down on me this weekend, he was missing all weekend, I was again in the dark, feeling alone and rejected, he kept giving me hope that he was coming home to talk, and as I sat and waited for what seemed like an eternity he never came, but instead I got an email saying he can't do this and is never coming back, 4 lines is all I got from him all he thought I was worthy of receiving, frantic I tried calling and to my disbelieve he had blocked my phone number. Now every day I can't stop replaying the last two weeks, what did I miss, why was I so stupid, how will I ever recover or love again.

David Pheng

October 10, 2016 @ (Cambodia)

Tags: Heartbroken Breakup

A month ago, I was deeply in love with this sweet tough guy whom I nicknamed him "Blueberry". The relationship we had was like an electromagnetic force turned into flames and sparks, although sadly it only lasted for a month. It all started in the late summer and ended in the early monsoon. It was the kind of love that was unexpected and overwhelming, and we had no idea why we ended up falling in love at first sight. Meh, you wouldn't believe me, right? Yup, I wouldn't believe myself, either.

I had always thought that the idea of being in love at first sight was "foolish" until it happened to me. He was brave enough to hold my hand, walking in the pouring rain and whispering to me that he'd never met someone like me before. At that blissful moment, I caught him looking and smiling at me dazzlingly, laughing like a little kid. Oh, you know what? His smile was infectious; his deep husky voice kept me interested in whatever he talked about; and his large and tall body kept me safe and warm. I knew he also liked me...and I was happy.

Time passes; feelings change; memories fade; people leave but hearts never forget. We broke up out of the blue. It hurt like hell when he told me he tried to make the relationship work but it didn't, because he made me fall so deep in love with him. It was the moment I knew I'd just lost a soulmate whom I could talk to for hours without any pretense, laughing at his jokes without acting like he was a funny guy (because he was one hell of a funny guy) and sharing secrets to each other. I felt like I'd lost someone more than a close friend, although we only spent a month together. We'd had plans to be done and promises to be made until we found out that we weren't meant to be together in the end.

I would be lying if I said that I was fine going through the breakup...but I guess, it was okay, because I kept reminding myself that all I've always wanted is for him to be happy even if I'm not the cause of his happiness. The combination of anger, guilt, and revenge built up inside me has finally subsided. I admit I was so mad and depressed, leaving him numerous messages and calls...because I wanted him to be there when my heart was broken and fire was burning inside me. I couldn't sleep and eat well for several weeks; I lost some pounds; I looked up "how to mend a broken heart" articles on the internet, yet they couldn't help much as my heart still wanted what it wanted, although my head tried to prevent me from going back to what'd shattered my heart into pieces. The funny thing was I even cried at work when he instantly popped up inside my mind.

Buried deep inside my head, his presence was still there. I saw the invisible him every where we used to go together. As much as I tried to erase him from my mind, I only kept hurting myself by doing so. It took like a month to get better from it. However I'm in the process of healing my heart and bringing back the old happy me, deep down inside I still miss him and wish him all the best. I love him. I still do. But I'm letting him go if that's what makes him happier. Thanks for all the memories which will be kept and locked forever in my heart.

Stephen King once said, "Some birds are not meant to be caged, that's all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go, or when you open the cage to feed them they somehow fly out past you. And the part of you that knows it was wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices, but still, the place where you live is that much more drab and empty for their departure."