Searching for "special"

67 Results For 'special'

Gu

October 22, 2014 @ (China)

Tags: Bad breakup, love is about letting go

I consider her the most important girl in my life. Let me tell you why.

Before I dated her, I had three previous relationships.

The first I consider a puppy love; the second I stole her virginity and cheated on her; the third I thought I love her much, but objectively speaking it was too sexual. In between I was also very flirtatious. I love to fool around and usually grow an immediate attraction to those girls who are willing to talk about sex, aka sluts. I was very into sex.

After I got hurt from my last breakup, I told myself I would never believe in love again. So I decided I could just turn back into the old me and flirt around. Eventually, I also slept with someone who wasn't my girlfriend. I also allowed myself to engage in cyber sex with a girl who had a bf back then.

None of this was known about me by the public. I hide it pretty well. I live with a double face life.

All of this ended after I fell in love with this special girl. It was a love at first sight. We had been close friends, maybe even best friends more like 7 to 9 months back then. I just suddenly realize how much care she actually giving me, and how I am actually really attracted to this kind of good girl. So I started showing her my love and fortunately she also loves me. Falling in love with your best friend is just beautiful. (this is coming from a guy)

She is just a pure girl. Someone with good moral values, who can really lead you to the right path. She is also very traditional. So we agree we would have no sex until we are fortunate enough to get married. And since then, for 20 months, we simply make out and have no sex. If you ask the old me, I guess I would have been shocked to know I can live without having sex with my gf. (I rmb I was literally angry when my second gf didn't agree to have sex with me back then; and then I also was very sexually involved with the next gf; and of course that time that I allowed myself to engage in casual sex)

But of course, its more than that. I just realize this kind of life, where I follow good value, be a good guy, no double life is what I truly want. In a sense I realize I had destroyed my integrity with what I did before. All this was only made possible because of her being with me, her loving me.

At the beginning, it turned out she actually knew some of my past. And she said if I am not the same anymore, she is willing to give me a chance. I felt really touched by that. I think that is what being loved feels like: knowing you are a sinner but somehow a great girl still willing to give you another chance to be a better man. I told myself I won't let this girl down ever again.

I hope it's obvious now how special she is to me. In a sense, she was there with me at the right time. Being here with me when I sinned, when learnt from my past and mature enough to know what is right for myself and what is not.

Unfortunately, we didn't last.

The problem was that she somehow dug my old stuff out. My old chat history with my previous girlfriends or sluts that I flirted with. And because of some reason, I also had to tell her about my causal relationship (terribly so, the girl is someone she knows)

It just all started to crumble for her.

As she read those words, she got more and more disappointed at me. She is very upset and hurt for what I did. This might have sth to do with her possible bipolar disorder and family issues that has made her highly insecure. And I am her first bf too. There is a lot going on her mind: insecurity, sharing her guy with many girls, not able to trust my words anymore and so on. So she kept asking for breakups. I tried to save our relationship millions of times already. But her hatred against me and her pain just grew. So finally I agree to try and separate from her...

It's so difficult for me. It's just the first day of not talking to her today. And obviously I am dying. But once I recall what I did, and think about her hurt she is because of me, I know I am making the right decision this time to give her the same she deems.

It's time for me to brave and take care of her. (She has always been the "strong" person in our relationship more often than me) She deserves to be happy. Maybe we can get back together if she can be mature enough to let go of my past. Or maybe can't. Either way I hope she can really be happy. Because I am indeed very happy with her.

She changed me for the better. I am forever indebted to her. I also wouldn't go back to those dark alleys like I once did.

I am changed, forever, because of her. And I am hoping to show her how special and how much I love her, by letting her go...

Natasha

August 08, 2014 @ (New Jersey)

Tags: bad breakup, betrayal

Ok, so here it goes. We met in college at 19 years old, he pursued me. We went out on a date and boom from there we saw each other multiple times, got into a relationship and fell in love. He was my first love and he broke my heart. We were together about 4 and 1/2 years, he lived with me in my mom's house and we didn't charge him any rent or anything always made sure he had food, clothes whatever he needed, I took care of him pretty much. He was a great guy, always treated me well but very unmotivated which caused me to be very bitchy towards him because I just wanted him to make something of himself and do something with his life. When you are with someone almost 5 years you want your relationship to move forward and progress and I just felt like we were stuck. Besides the point I made many mistakes in the relationship too but what happened in the end is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. We started to drift and I noticed so he went away for the weekend as did I separately to think things over and I wanted to work on it because I was still in love with him and he didn't have any desire to work on it so just like that it was over. Now here comes the good part. I confided in one of my close friends about the breakup and told her I was still in love with my ex only to find out her and him started dating 2 weeks later after him and I broke up and apparently they are in love now and in a relationship. Mind you I know this girl since I was 12 years old. My heart is shattered into pieces, it is honestly a horrible feeling when someone betrays you like this especially when you spend so much time with a person and they say they will never hurt you but they do. The biggest lesson I have learned from this is to never put to much trust in anyone. Honestly this situation has made me doubt ever wanting to fall in love again because the heartbreak just hurts to much.

Dina

July 25, 2014 @ (Lebanon)

Tags: going through a breakup

No this ain't another happy ending story .
Beautiful,smart,funny,talented,good hearted ?
when it comes to love you forget all your qualities .
You Just love the person who makes you question your own self.Like any other person, I fell in love, well don't I have the right to?
He was a family-friend, and like any charming man he was irresistible .
every thing we did based on good intentions that's for sure . Should we blame our hearts for beating faster ? or our bodies for getting nervous? or our minds for day dreaming ?
We didn't plan falling in love indeed.
But we couldn't stop our hands of reaching each other . nor our hearts of finding each other.
Well it was amazingly speechless, it was our little paradise.
We happily lived together for a long time.
we kissed, we went to parties, we got drunk , we watched each one another fall asleep.. we faced many problems but we worked it out . The perfect life of two wild teenagers.
He ditched everything for me his studies , his work and whatever , i know it sounded bad so i convinced him to return to his old life. I won the dispute but i never thought i'd lose my man.
i was never the 'drama queen' but at the moment of goodbye it was like our lives stopped for awhile , people stopped moving , everything became frozen we couldn't feel anything but ourselves.
Yea days passed and we didn't stop talking to each other including Skype and other communication apps.
We got busy so we stopped the ''talking'' gradually , well yea maybe we failed at long distances relation like many others.
Well i was too faithful thinking he'd come back again.
Then i figured it all out. He broke our dreams, our hopes, our promises , our thoughts , our hearts , MY HEART.
He cheated on me , well gratefully he wasn't the one who keeps his dirty work as a 'secret' , he was an honest one.
Yea the sun rises again letting the dark disappear ,i decided to move on and let the past get buried.
I started seeing other people , letting hope get in, and my past out.
But you know what it was never the same, not the same feelings, not the same thoughts , not the same him. Though they were much better men, but hey love isn't related to materials nor facial image.
He was still in touch with my family specially my mom , he was there when my Grandpa died and transported the news for my mom . Every time we communicate again it feels like magic , the same feelings reappeared again like it never faded.
But its never going to work again . I'd trust him again but i won't trust myself with him.
It's not about cheating, people make mistakes. But he never came back when i left him how would i trust him again, how would i let him in when everything around me says that i should get out.

Aubery

May 30, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: just tired and disappointed in myself

he was a friend from a long to one of the very few people i talk to with all my heart. And he is quiet perfect actually very well natured, good at heart, understanding and doesnt have any sort of bad habits. so naturally i said yes when he wanted to be more than friend because i did not find a reason to say no....
but i did not feel the spark that intense feelings towards him.... i thought that slowly i would fall in love but i never did... i care a lot about him but i dnt think its to the level to be called as love... and more over i dont have passion or lust i generally get bored when he tries to make out... but he genuinely loves me (much mare then i deserve actually)... i kept waiting (careful not to break his heart) that suddenly i would realize that i love him... but it became suffocating especially when he practically glows with love in my presence... i desperately try to return that emotion but i just cannot... so now i just gave up trying to feel that non-existent love and decided to move on... i know i broke his heart and i feel so terrible... was my decision if not right at-least reasonable ?

Annie

March 26, 2014 @ (Los Angeles)

Tags: Badbreakup hopeless love

As a seventeen year old girl I have been told that I am beginning to start out my life. But I can't seem to wrap my finger around it I don't know why but I truly hate being a teenager.. Well anyways I grew up in a very Christian family where as a small child I was not exposed to much of the outer world I was literally locked up at home with only gospel music and movies of Daniel in the lions den. I guess you can say I was an innocent child, when I started high school I had everything planned out I would go to school stay in my books and study hard to graduate with no drama . Life however decided to throw me the unexpected. At the age of fourteen I met a guy who was like no other or so I thought, he showed me everything that I didn't know existed for example music genres, because of him I found out that I love alternative rock, yea yea I didn't know what that was xp.. I really thought we would be together forever like he told me, we even ran away together. my parents did not like the fact that I started to date an "outsider" a guy who wasnt Christian so they did everything possible to break us up, I was sent to Texas for a couple of months but that didnt work. Nothing they did worked, my family would warn me about how guys only use you or that he will find someone else then leave you stranded I didn't believe them, I admit I am a stubborn person. I loved him with all my heart and but to this day I still do, I love him so much that it hurts v.v We had dated for three years, he then broke up with me right after our three year anniversary. I gave up everything to him, my innocence, my trust, my love everything even money. Everyday we would spend together and when he broke up with me I felt as if I was being hit by trucks. It has been 5 months since our break up and I still can't move on. I have tried just about everything there is to forget but it's hard, especially since my school is literally one hall way. I see him everyday and it hurts, just yesterday I saw him with another girl.. And it hurt since yesterday would have been 3 years and 5 months. To make matters worse i recently found out that he had cheated on more than once throughout our relationship, and honestly that just made my depression worse..He was my first boyfriend ever and probably my last, guys are too complicating and I'm not good with relationship. I was told to never run away from my problems but there are times where you have to get away to continue with your life. I'm a senior with only two months until graduation, but because I decided to take the teenage love life experience I am forced to transfer schools. Life as a teenage girl.. .-.

Jane Doe

February 26, 2014 @ (phoenix, AZ)

Tags: breakup family sister cheating drama mexicans will always believe their daughter

This is a really looong story.

Due to mutual friends, I was introduced to this guy. Lets call him Kev. We were only 15. We talked everyday on the phone. I had a feeling that he might like but I shrugged it off as I only saw him as a friend and I was still heart broken from my previous break up with "Stan". I loved Stan with all my heart and I still do! Anyways, after getting to know Kev, he asked me to be his gf 6 months later but I rejected him cause I couldn't get over Stan. Then we got into an argument about something stupid and stopped talking for about 2 months. He approached me when we started talking again. By then, I thought I was starting to get over Stan so I gave Kev a chance. We started dating and I was so happy cause it felt like Stan was starting to fade away in my mind (he never did). 4 months into our relationship, we had sex for the first time. We were both virgins so neither of us knew what to do. Needless to say, it sucked. But I was okay with it at first cause sex isn't everything. However, everytime we have sex, it felt terrible. My friends would suggests things but they never worked! I, on the other hand, became quite the expert in oral sex cause of all the advice my friends gave me. After 6 months of trying, I couldn't take it anymore. I tried breaking up with him but it made me realized how attached I am to him. So we got back together. Shortly after that, his bitchy older sister, "Stacy", found out we're in a serious relationship. Idk what's wrong with her, but she was insane! First, she lied to her family saying I harassed her via texts and they believed her! I was banned from the house until the lie was falling apart. The next time I saw her, she was angry cause Kev told her I went to the movies with my ex "Danny". Danny and I were really close friends. Yeah, he was madly in love with me but I didn't feel the same way. We would talk on and off cause everytime when are going well, he think he'd have a chance, so I would stop talking to him for a while. Anyways, Stacy was furious that I did that. She threatened me and said she will kill my ass next time. I wanted to say something back so I would look like a spineless person cause I'm not at all, but Kev just told me to ignore her. BIG MISTAKE. After that, she probably think I was weak cause she kept threatening me. Family did nothing. All they ever say is to ignore her. Well I got tired of her and I was still sexually frustrated, so I talked to Danny about it. Note this, Danny was saving his virginity for me and he was already 18 at the time. One thing led to another, I ended up sleeping with Danny (he sucked too). I deeply regretted it and confessed my crime to Kev. He was angry but he was glad I told him. In the end, I chose Kev over Danny. Now, all that we've been through, Stacy is still harassing me. And I felt like Kev cared more about his friends and family than me cause he never stood up for me. He claimed he has but I call bs. So once again, I was fed up. Another friend who was also head over heels for me was there to comfort me whenever Stacy would verbally abuse me. Needless to say, I made another mistake. I, again, confessed my crime to Kev and he was beyond angry because they go to the same school so he knew him. Well I tried breaking it off with Kev but everytime, something calls me back. I feel terrible for what I did and Kev always reminded me... No, the harassing never stopped. We almost got into a fight once...(she's 3x my size). I stopped the cheating, I didn't want it to turn into a habit. But then I found out he went and hung out with my friend's twin in the middle of the night. "Supposedly" nothing happened, but the twin said he tried to get at her. Idk who to believed so I dropped it. When we were together for about 1 1/2 year, he took this girl to Comicon. I smelled something fishy but again, he claimed nothing happened. Third strike, I found out he was kiking this girl "Joey". The old messages were already deleted but calling another "cutie" is already enough. We officially ended a month ago. We were together for 2 years and 5 months.

in the end, I learned not to meet the guy's family (especially the sisters), if I'm unhappy I should just leave and not cheat, and lastly, Kev is a lying cunt. He liked to remind me of my crimea but whenever I bring up his, he would always say "I didn't fuck her. You actually went and fucked Danny!" Yeah, he made me felt like shit

I know I made many mistakes in this relationship but damn, my life revolves around him. Idk how to function without him by my side... I should just stop talking to him, huh?

p.s. No, I never stopped thinking about Stan. He was my first love.

Jane Doe

February 26, 2014 @ (phoenix, AZ)

Tags: breakup family sister cheating drama mexicans will always believe their daughter

Beckaah

January 27, 2014 @ (NZ)

Tags: confusing breakup

I met a guy on Tinder (yeah, i know that should have been alarm bells from the start). I'd been trying not to encourage him too much as I'd had a really bad relationship in the past which had caused me to have serious trust issues. I told him I just wanted to be friends, and thinking that he would be like most tinder guys and would bugger off as soon as he heard that, I didn't think it would go anywhere. But he was so persistent, and he would message me everyday, and after a few weeks we exchanged numbers and were soon texting every day. I looked forward to those texts because he was a really sweet guy and seemed to be able to cheer me up when I was having a bad day. Finally, I agreed to meet him, and it turned out that we actually had a lot in common, and we got on really well. Then a week later he asked me to be his girlfriend. I wasn't too sure as I didn't know a lot about him, but I knew I really liked him so I decided to go with it and see where it ended up. He went away over christmas for 3 weeks, but we still texted every day, and then he came back and was all excited to see me. And then the shit hit the fan. I thought he was acting strange, but when I confronted him about it he just said everything was fine and it was all in my head. I saw him last Friday and we had a super cute date, and he told me how special he was and how much he loved me. And then on Saturday morning I woke up to a text saying that I obviously wasn't coping with him never being able to see me, and so the relationship was over. It was the most pathetic excuse he could have used as I'd never ever suggested that in my life. I have my suspicions that he cheated on me but I'll never know for sure. He's now cut me completely out of his life( he deleted me on facebook 10 minutes after he dumped me), and I haven't had any texts from him or anything. I still have some of his stuff which I need to give back to him but he won't even see me long enough to let me do that, despite telling me by text that he does want it back. It feels weird to not have him in my life, as he's been such a big part of it for the last 3 months, but I kind of feel like it's for the best. I just miss my good morning beautiful texts that I would get every morning without fail :( I just wish I knew what I did that made this go from being such a happy relationship to such a ruined one

123

December 21, 2013 @ (uk)

Tags: heartbreak bad break up

So this summer I went on a language course in valencia. And on my last night i met this beautiful polish girl. The school I was going to had arranged a dinner and I wanted to sit with all my friends but the only space was next to her, who I had previously not met. Anyway, we started talking and got on really well all through the evening, at the start I didnt think she liked me but I realized she did when I kept catching her looking at me when my head was turned away. The next day I came back to UK and we started talking loads on facebook and skype. Skyping her was always the best part of my day. We spoke for about three weeks like that all the time her saying yeh you should come see me in poland ! So i thought about it and eventually got round to booking my tickets and eventually went to see her for a weekend. We had the best weekend ever and got on amazingly well, slept together every night and talked about how much we liked each other and how cute we were and how amazing this whole situation was. She said she had not felt like this with anyone for a really long time and that she felt so comfortable with me which was weird as it usually takes her much longer to get so comfy and like someone so much. She was basically the first proper girl I had done anything like this with, so it made me feel really good and she said how special I made her feel and how I gave her shivers down her spine. Basically, I was head over heals for her and she genuinely seemed to like me as much as I liked her. I came back and a few days after we skyped and I bought my tickets to go back in about a month and a half's time. The first few weeks were fine, although I missed her loads and thought about her all the time we spoke loads and she always said how much she couldn't wait to see me and that she adored me and that she wanted me and how much she wanted to kiss me and hug me etc, considering this was my first girl I was basically in this amazing haze of happiness, everything just felt so good. But as time went on I think we both began to realize the reality of the situation. Neither of us wanted anything serious or it to be more than a bit of fun, but at the same time I think she fell for me as much as I did her. We began to text a bit less as she got busier and things started to slow down, and even skyping wasn't so great anymore. One night we skyped and I told her that I didn't think things were going to work out well and that there was no way that they could and that the whole situation was a bit stupid. The next week was terrible we barely spoke and when we did it was awkward. The more I thought about it that more things didn't make sense espeically as we weren't even properly going out or together or anything. I did try to hold thingks on since I had already bought my dam tickets but she began to be really cold and distant and said she had been on dates with some guy, which although we did agree was fine that if we see someone we like we should go for it, although it did make me feel like shit as she knew i had bought my tickets to go there in just a few weeks time. It eventually ended when she told me she was seeing some guy and that we could only be friends if I came to see her, and that it wasn't the fact she was seeing someone else it was the fact its too difficult to maintain anything even though everything she said was true. Although I understood and knew deep down it was always going to end badly, I still felt terrible as it was a week before I was meant to go and I thought it was bad how she started seeing someone knowing I had booked everything and more that she accused me of becoming too attached, when she had told me all this stuff and that it was true...I will never understand why she couldn't see that. I haven't spoken to her since and don't intend to, but it really sucked at the time, cried for three days straight and generally just felt completely empty and destroyed and completely unhappy and without meaning or drive. Although we werent official or anything it still sucked, but it does feel good to get it off my chest ! word of warning, the first experience with a girl / women will never end well, beware that they also can say shit and then the complete opposite a few days later....definitely scared of getting involved with anyone else for the time being !

Broken Hearted Girl...

December 19, 2013 @ (Philadelphia )

Tags: Sad

When I first saw him I was stunned he was so sexy and tall with braids .... we starting talking but then something stupid happened and we stopped. We wound up in the same school and started talking again then eventually dating ... I knew instantly he was someone special .. we soon fell in love and things were going well ... but he had many secrets and he lied multiple times .... over and over and over ... he still thinks to this day that I believe all the lies he too but I just let him believe .. so we were on and off and I just kept going back because I really love him ... but I guess it just wasn't ment to be :( I still love him to this day but we don't really talk any more .. I git kicked out of my school so I don't see him any more ... it hurts really badly and I want him back ... I don't understand why though ... I want to know how he feels ... or at least how he felt ... I wish he knew :(