Tags: cheating?
Alright so where do I start.. We met at work, the girl I'm dating now, and we've been together for about 2 years now. I am 20 and she is 18. I guess I'm writing this because I'm confused and I need to get this off my chest.
Since we have started dating she has texted and messaged every guy at our club (over 20+). Now this would not have bothered me if she had not been writing to them nasty messages like she wants their dick or wants to show them a "good time".
I found all this because I felt that something wasn't right and everyone at our club would tell me that I'm too good for her and she doesn't deserve me.
Well long story short I confronted her about this and at first she denied it up until I showed her proof.. So she started to cry.. A lot.. and apologized and kept assuring me that nothing ever happened.. She said she needed to do all this to feel like she has "power". At first I didn't understand until she explained to me that as a child she was sexually abused by a close friend of the family. In the end she kept reassuring me that nothing happened sexually with the people at our club. So I believed her.
I have always been faithful and true to her because she is my first. But once I found all that was going on behind my back, the trust I had for her is broken.. I try but I can't seem to trust her anymore. But she keeps promising me that she will never do this again because she doesn't want to loose me.
We have talked about living together, getting married and having kids but.. A part of me doesn't want that anymore.. Because I feel like it will happen again. I don't want to waste my time with someone who will not be faithful and give it her all in the relationship.
I don't know whether I should stay with her or break up. The reason I'm contemplating is because she is going to be moving across states from me to live a "stress free" life for a couple of months. And I can understand why... her family treats her like a maid or nanny and doesn't really acknowledges her as part of there family, and they don't really approve of us being together. Things are basically not going her way. I just feel that she will mess up and cheat on me. I don't want that to happen. I can't go with her because my work is here.
So what do you guys think I should do? I need advise. I am really lost.
Tags: Isaac, caroline, me, isaacs parents
we were in 2nd grade when it all started- instantly he saw me and felt the need to protect me ( yeah I know puppy love) I dont know why but that day he asked me to be his girl I said yes, but then on the playground when we were playing star wars something clicked! I dont wanna date yet. I mean i was only 6 1/2 going on 7 ( I was a little behind) this whole thing went on until about 5th grade when we werw getting curious and getting the talk and that he took a shot again at it (he also tries in 3rd... and 4th :D lol.) I said yes and he was acctually a good Bf he gave me suckers from the sales and we even danced together in the 5th grade show (yeah i know- peachy. but i stepped on his foot alot...) He was acting weird, not answering my emails, I saw it coming and was prepared- BUT what he did I was unprepared for!! He finally emailed me that "my parents say we cant date anymore.. :(" I of course thought something was fishy and knew what it was before I even clicked out of that message- his parents wouldnt do that! They were totally happy for us and acctually cool with like everything so i replied with "um... No... they were happy for us. Oh my gosh what is up with YOU?" I sort it out through my head and start crying but am stopped dead in my tracks as my eyes scan at the message he just sent. I couldnt believe it! he had typed "I like someone else, Ok?" I instantly insist that he tells me who it is. im shocked but who he says. Caroline- one of my bestfriends!! he then says "my dad told me to lie to you." I reply with "thx." his words pierce through me "shut up and get over it you *itch!" I am tooken back. how dare he but heres the worst part, then he said "ill use a condom," that was way to far and made me want to kick his ass- that little PERV heck I bet he dont even got equiptment. Now im going into 6th grade and if he messes with me again he will hear from my brother.
Tags: Confused, heartbroken
we met in freshman year of high school he had a crush on each other and somehow nothing ever happened. we had always crossed paths but once again nothing ever happened. we are now both 20 and in a serious relationship. before we were official we dated for a while, one night i went out with my girlfriends i got super drunk i have no recollection of anything. he took me in that night and took care of me. that day we called one of my girlfriends asking her if i had done anything stupid she said no. we both sighed of relief. this happened about five months ago we were just dating. a few days ago i recieved a text from my friend say that i did hook up with someone and that something was put i drink. i automatically freaked out and told my boyfriend. the only thing he responded to me with was a "just leave im done". something didnt feel so right so i called my friend and asked her what the heck was up with the text, she had no idea what i was talking about. turns out i did absolutley nothing like i knew i did and her brother pulled a prank on me. i told my boyfriend but he still does not want to be with me. after i did absolutely nothing. what should i do? ANYTHING HELPS!! I'M REALLY BROKEN INSIDE AND HURTING ENDLESSLY. I WANT NOTHING MORE THAN TO BE WITH HIM AGAIN
Tags: Acceptance
We met when I was 21 and she was just turning 18, a little over 5 years ago. There was instant attraction and our relationship advanced quickly. I knew deep down that neither of us were mature enough to be in a long term committed relationship, but we stuck together anyways. There were a lot of good times, fun memories, amazing sex and we were always there for eachother through the ups and downs. About two years into the relationship there were multiple infadelities-- she started sleeping with one of my good friends behind my back and I had slept around with more than 1 girl. Despite this huge blow to our trust and relationship, we stuck together after we came clean with each other on what we had done. In hindsight I know that we stuck together because we were attached and had some form of needyness with each other. I feel weak to admit that, but I honestly just felt attached and couldn't let her go despite the fact that we had both hurt each other severely and that we deserved better. I knew in my heart at the time that I should have let her go, but my impulsive needyness forced me to hold on to a relationship that had become toxic. Since then we tried to rebuild the foundation of trust in our relationship, but we were fighting an uphill battle and there was just too much insecurity and distrust towards eachother. A year and a half ago we moved in together, which was a big mistake. Things were ok on the surface, but deep down we both felt disconnected and unhappy with the relationship. Along the way we became very short tempered and irritated with eachother. She would yell and call me names, I would yell back and say hurtful things-- stuff you just don't do when you say that you love someone. I knew in my heart for a long time it was not right and that I needed to let go, but I just didn't have the courage to part company with her. I feel ashamed for having held on to something that I knew was not right for me. We broke up about 5 weeks ago after she did not come home one night. She told me she went out to party with her friends and stayed with a female co-worker, but my intuition told me otherwise. We both agreed that we were not right together and both needed to stand on our own two feet. We were together for 5 and a half years and although I know that it was not the right relationship for me I still feel a deep sense of loss an emotional pain. Despite having hurt eachother I had considered her my best friend-- we did everything together and wanted desperately to make things work. I have been trying so hard for the last 5 weeks to look at the reality of the relationship, but my mind keeps wanting to tell me that we could have made it work or that I should have been a better man. The fact is I was immature and acted with the level of maturity and awareness that I had at the time-- I think it's fair to say that she did too. I keep beating myself up over what I could have done differently and all the what if's, but it has only held me back from letting go and moving on. I am trying so hard to accept that it's over, but still find myself hoping for reconciliation in the future-- hope that is eating me up inside. I know that we both deserve better and that it cannot work. I am not one to share my personal story on an online forum such as this, but I started reading a book the other day that suggested I post about the breakup on this website. It has been helpful typing this story up and putting things into perspective. I think it's important that I look at my past relationship logically rather than feed off of my emotions. Anyways, I know my story probably sounds crazy or like I am a bad guy for having cheated, but I would appreciate any feedback. I am now 26 and have come to so many realizations in reflecting on the relationship. I really want to better myself and become the best man that I can be not only for myself, but so that I can have a healthy, loving relationship in the future. Most importantly I want to love myself so I never put myself in a toxic relationship again where I think that I don't deserve better. Anyways, stay strong to everyone that is going through similar heart break or emotional pain. Everyone keeps telling me it will pass-- I just hope that it does sooner than later!
Tags: he tried it with my cousin
im 18 years old now but just over 3 years ago i had dated a guy i had known m whole life i always loved him but never knew how to tell him so one day i was out with my cousin but he never met her before so he thought she was just a friend when she told him how i felt he asked me out that night and i said yes he kept telling me he loved me and he wanted to be with me forever and i was stupid enough to believe him mainly because i had known him forever anyway we had been together just 2 months and my mum had agreed to let him stay the night with me because i was going to be home alone we were happy and i decided that i trusted him enough so we had sex that night a week later my cousin who he still thought was just a friend came to my house with her boyfriend who was his cousin and she had told me that he tried to go with her behind my back at first i didnt believe her but when she showed me the messages he had sent to her phone i cried my heart was broke how could someone i knew my whole life want to hurt me so much that day i called him and asked him to come up to my mums house when i confronted him he denied it so i showed him the messages and he said she was lying that she had his phone and sent them to herself i was heartbroken how stupid did he think i was?? he went silent and didnt know what to say when i told him that she was my younger cousin i was so upset but i had to laugh when i saw the look on his face maybe now he'll think before he tries it on some other girl hahaha p.s im now engaged to a wonderful guy i met just a month after we broke up so in a way im glad it happened xxxx
I met him in high school. I was one of the most popular girls and I got along with every social group and every type of person. He was a shy guy. One of those skater looking guys, always with music playing on his iPod and still managing to get good grades even though it looked like he was day dreaming all the time. Nobody knew him in high school until I came into his life and made him popular. We didnt do everything together, but we still spent our extra time together. After years of being apart, we got married. I sacrificed everything for him... including my friends, family, and my own health...
But tonight my feelings are changed. I don't love him as I did. He has been sneaking around behind my back. And that is something I will not forgive. Its time he learned the harsh reality of his wrong doings.
He is so afraid of me leaving him. I plan to. But I'm choosing to do it when he least expects it. I'm going to pack up all my things and leave while he is at work.
Sucks to be made a fool of, and now it is his turn.
Good luck finding another diamond in the dust. You selfish boy. :)
Tags: Best Friend, Messy, Life Goes on,
So I've been through a lot this past year and I feel like I am falling into the same pattern. It all started when I came out of the closet in February of 2008, my best friend didn't really know how to handle it. I could tell that he really wasn't okay with it, what I didn't know was that it was because he was actually gay too. So a few months after I came out out he eventually told me he was fine with it, and it was one of the happiest moments of my life. As time passed I noticed a change in him and then in July of 2009 he came out to me, and my reaction was well a little surprised. I never would have thought he was ever gay, he tried so hard to conceal that he was gay, he even dated and slept with girls, so it took some real evidence to prove that he wasn't messing with me. So he told me about the guy he had been seeing and it was all fine and dandy. Since I had met my best friend I always found him attractive, but now he was actually available. Summer turned to fall and soon enough he told me that he wasn't gay anymore, that 'it was a lifestyle choice he didn't wish to pursue.' I didn't believe him then and I don't believe him now mostly because I've seen him on a gay dating site recently. But never the less I still really liked him. He showed me this dating site that he used to meet guys and he signed me up, even though 'he wasn't gay anymore' he always insisted that I go out and meet guys, he was rather adamant which I found a bit odd, considering he was never interested in my love life before. Things began to get messy when he started to act out and act well a little recklessly, mostly because we and all of our friends were turning 19 and could start drinking, so he'd drive drunk, and he would do just do the dumbest things. This behavior went on for a year which brings us to 2011. 2011 was a very hard year for me. One day in the middle of July and I don't know the exact date, but he came over with some stuff I left at his house and he handed the items to me. I asked what was wrong and if he wanted to get a coffee, and he said 'Why would we do that?' and I said 'Because we're friends' and he replied 'Are we?' After that he turned away and I never saw him again. A month later I found out it was because I had feelings for him and that he had told all of our friends that I was a liar and horrible friend, that I was somehow delusional and that I had gone around spreading lies that he was gay when I told maybe 2 people who didn't say a word. So in the end he turned out to just be a coward who was trying to save his own ass who didn't care who he hurt in the process. Its been 7 months and I still haven't spoken or seen him, in the end I realized he would never have the courage to tell people how he really felt about anything or that he would never have the courage to tell anyone that he was a homosexual, and sometimes I feel like I may have hindered that. But its not always going to be my fault the blame will fall on him and all the lies and all the pettiness will catch up to him and everyone will see him for what he is. I won't vilify him and he shouldn't vilify me, we were both in our own ways wrong. I don't miss him anymore, I don't even want to be friends with him, mostly because of this one simple fact, I was his best friend and he always told me we would be friends no matter what, and I think to myself;I was hi best friend and look what he did to me? Why would I want to be friends with such a selfish person? Who put his own need to hide a silly secret above my feelings, I guess I wasn't as important to him as he liked to say, because if I was he would have at least talked to me and tried to work it out. I won't ever go back because I know if I did everything would be like it was before, he wouldn't respect me and it would be a misrealble disaster.
I'm moving on and more and more I am forgeting him, it started in September when I realized I couldn't remember the sound of his voice or his laugh, then things about him started to slip, and now I am starting to forget what he looked like, I feel like one day I'll need to grab a picture to remember him.
Tags: love hurts, im sorry
It all started in 8th grade this shy quiet guy name christian was in my class he was really shy and like he would hang around my crew but wwe really didnt fuck wit him like that..I was a very loud girl very popular.. and i would always bully him because he was shy but then he starte dating this girl and they dated for a year but he was till shy.. oh yea and he was smart too.. but like a year later in my freshman my friend andrea showed him a picture of me in new years and like he saw it and he said "damn she fine" he was saying that bout me wellshe told me and i was like who is christian i already had forgot bout him till i seen him in the hall way and like i told her to tell him that he was fine theni got his number from her.. so we started txtin him and like he was the sweeetest guy in the world he cared about me even back then when we havent even had started dating like he seemed to match to the "perfect" guy every girl would like to meet.. so we started dating on 2.25.10 but we broke up like on june 30. 2010 because iwasnt sure of what i felt for him anymore... i was confused i was so used to being single and like i wanted my freedom back and i broke up with him poor him he was torn apart i broke his heart and i was his second gf. well like a month or two later we started dating again till like my "bestfriend" told him that i cheated on him and it was a total lie why would i cheat on him when he was the sweetest guy in the world the guy i loved the guy i wanted to spend the rest of my life with... well we broke up and like a month later we got together again and another "bestfriend" told him i had cheated and i dint cheat this time.. they where jus mad because of the guys they loved didnt wanna b with them anymore.. well we got back together...again.. till i forgave one of the girls that said shit to him and he got mad told me no to hangout with her or any of my other firends i said okay so i lost all my friends.. well me and this girl started being friends again and like she took me somewhere and he got mad and broke up wit me... this was 7.2.11 and like since then i would txt him nad i wouldnt get a respond soo i would one day i wanted to see if i was still important to him so i made up a lie and told him i had cancer, and i also told him i was pregnant! but he caught me in my lies and didnt wanna b wit my anymore and he dindt get the pont that i did it jus so i can be with him..he never really appreciated me he started being mean to me and like wold even put his hands on me.. but now this month he told mehe wanted to work this out we have been having sex again but after i left him get it he left me for a girl that has been tryna get wit him for about two years.. and like now im heartbroken 1/28/2012 i was so used to him :(
So i was at school walking around when this guy called me over too him, wed been talking alot on facebook but hadnt officially met. he was such a sweetheart and anything you could ever want as weeks past i started getting feelings for him he admitted he was too wed text, latenight phonecls, hug and his when we seen eachother at school. I really feel gor him and he always said he had really big feelings for me too until oneday i found.out he got into a relationship with another girl. he just kept lying and saying he wasnt but i knew it was true. i was so hurt how could a guy lead me on so far then just act like nothing happened. we stopped talking for awhile and then oneday he told me whenever he seen me hed remember the feelings he had for me and stuff. then 8months past and him and her broke up and he started texting me again and he got his bestfriend too text me and i was getting along well with both of them until james(the guy who played me) stopped txting me but me and beau (james bestmate) kept texting wed talk everyday and night and id tell him how i still had feelings for james and hed tell me to tell him and then a month later beau and mine texts got flirty and he ended.up coming to my house after showcase he parked behind.the fence and i snuck out to see him and we were play fighting then wed hug and then we starting kissing and we were talking and mucking around then.kissing again.and then.he had to leave to pick up his mate and he kept txting me after that we got along well but when i wss with him id have huge butterflies and a warm fuzzy feeling and this was the third timee being with him then the next day after school he picked me.up and i went back to his and we were being goobs and kissed againand i was there for awhile then id left to go home. tthen a few weeks later he asked me if it was ok to tell james that hed kissed me and stuff and i was like yeah then james started txting me saying beau and - kissing in the tree blah blah acting all jelousy now its been 2months and i thought i had feelins for james still and told him i wanted to be with him and he told me he felt the same but then.his ex told me he had kept ringing her telling her he still loved her and how he was flirting with other girls so i soughted my shit out and stopped talking to him and ive realised i like his bestfriend and his bestmate says he still likes me abit and his who i imagine myself with now. i honestly am so confused i dont know what to do cause i want tk be with beau so thats why i stopped talking to james but i dont know whether to tell beau how i feel or just stay friends with benifits cause i really like him and i know my situation could ruin their frienfships but it wont. and i dont know what to do ? Please help guys xx
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