He was my first boyfriend. I met him in my freshman year of college and I was going through a rough time. We were both on the tennis team together, so we met at a tennis party one night and he texted me the next day after the party and we just never stopped. We went on some dates and then he told me he loved me. I was so taken aback we had only been together a couple weeks, but I was stupid and I said it back even though I didn't necessarily feel it back. He would send me long messages about how he never wanted to lose me and how we would be together forever. Suddenly, I felt myself falling in love with him. In fact, I was more in love with him than he was with me. Then the summer came. We lived 4 hours away from each other, but he promised me we would make it work. He promised we would text everyday and call and would trying and see each other. The first month was okay. I went to his house and vacationed in his town with my family. Then he went on a cruise and he had bought a text plan to text me. Then after the cruise he came to my house and I felt like something was different. Like he didn't care anymore. When he went home after that things got difficult. He wouldn't text me good morning anymore, he wouldn't send me long messages, he wouldn't call me. I got into a car accident and when I tried calling and texting him he responded with "sorry I had a crisis of my own" and it was how a contact was stuck in his eye. Then he told me he wasn't sure if we were more than sex. But I stayed with him because I was sure it was just because of the distance. We finally got back to school and when I first saw hiim (I came to help him move in) all he did was say hi and didnt bother to give me a hug. Things were fine at first, but then I could see he was gettign annoyed to see me and we would fight everyday. I broke up with him. We have a class together and still do tennis and it is so hard to see him. I tried telling him how I felt the other day and how I wanted him back and the conversation ended with him leaving me outside of his Hall crying. I was stupid and kept texting him to see if we were going to work through this and there was no answer. I have never felt so unwanted in my life. I just want to move on.
Oh my gosh . My ex boyfriend is a douche bag. I swear .. I was never over him.. but he caused so much pain, and I really tried to .. BUT NOW HE WANTS TO GET BACK TOGETHER . I'VE HEARD RUMORS FROM MY FRIEND ALEX (who is also his best friend) BUT I DIDN'T BELIEVE IT. But now he's smiling at me with those beautiful teeth .. talking to me and luring me in with that voice.. the voice that's like honey and just makes me melt everytime I hear it. He changed me. I wasn't always depressed, even if my life wasn't all that great .. after my parents finalized the divorce, there wasn't much to look forward to. But he was there for me. He was always my shoulder to cry on. Ever since 7th grade . UGH, MIDDLE SCHOOL. I thought middle school was hard; but compared to high school, it was a party.. my emotions are just everywhere.. but yea, the point is, he ended up breaking me in the end. I knew it wasn't gonna last. Of COURSE I knew. But something at the back of my mind just wished it wasn't. And I guess I just couldn't accept the cruel reality that it was over. All those movie dates . All the times he'd put his arms around me.. and that smile- it was directed towards me and me only and I used to literally feel as if we were the only two people in the world. That strawberry blonde/brownish hair .. haha.. the long paragraphs he would send me in the morning about how beautiful he thought I was.. those times in third period where we laughed, he would flip his hair, start strumming that bass guitar of his while the strings teacher would yell at me about dropping my violin and then having to tune it all over again. We lived to make her annoyed omg , but I just miss it . I miss everything. I miss him. I miss not being lonely.
That time on the ferris wheel at the state fair with terry and alex? When we kissed and said 'I love you' for the 80th time?
I miss us.
The truth is, I was never over it. I miss running my fingers through his hair.
I just dont wanna be lonely.
I poured my heart out to him and he took advantage of me.
I miss that fairytale feeling.
But I guess all fairytales have to end. Just ask Troy. He had no problem ending mine.
And now he just wants to walk back into my life again? After all the pain that he's caused? Like nothing's happened? I just can't.
The thing that makes me hate myself the most? Everytime he glances at me, I still get butterflies. When I see him laugh in the hallways, my heard starts pounding inexpilcably fast. And the last and most horrifying thing? I was tempted. I was actually tempted to say yes.
I told him everything. I made myself completly vulnerable.. and I regret that. I really do. I already knew it wouldn't last forever, it never does, especially when you're so young. That feeling just.. wore off. He used to type a long paragraph just about how gorgeous he thinks I am but that slowly resolved to one word replies.. And remember that girlfriend? Yea, that came back to bite me in the butt. She started all this drama, constantly texting
Well, this guy and I started dating last summer. I've known him for such a long time (since elementary school maybe) and we were just like best friends. At first.. I thought it'd all turn out fine. There was still that shimmer of doubt but my heart blinded me to the point where I was convinced that we were unbreakable.
I remember when we used to pull all nighters on the phone and my dad would be SO mad because I didn't sleep at all that night and didn't want to get up in the morning.. The thing was, he had a girlfriend. He dumped her for me. Of course, I felt really guilty, but, I really liked him and the truth is, I was very flattered because I didn't think anyone would ever do that for me. He was literally my everything. I adored him in every way possible. He was so funny; he'd always make me laugh and I could have sworn we were made for each other. All my friends LOVED him, his personality is literally the best.. he's sensitive
We had went out over the summer of leaving the fifth grade. He had said he loved me so much,I meant the world to him, etc.. Young love. We had our little arguments here and there, but they didn't matter. Anyway, the next summer, we dated again. But it wasn't the same. My feelings for him had increased, but I could sense that his feelings for me were not the same. One day over the phone he broke up with me. I was so sad. But he said that we could still be friends. But he never talked to me afterwards. Later on I found out that after we broke up, he started dating my friend. I'm now going to the 9th grade. There isn't a day I go without thinking about him. Some people might call it pathetic, but I call it in love. We no longer talk to each other. Don't get the wrong idea, I'm not obsessed with him or anything, I just think about him. How can I get over him? I don't want my feelings for him to affect my current relationship. Or future relationships. I want him back in my life. :(
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