Searching for "lost"

158 Results For 'lost'

Steven G

July 11, 2014 @ (Yonkers, NY)

Tags: love, loss, bad break up, cheating, relationship

I have yet to go wrong on a â€œgut feelingâ€ when it comes to a disaster with a significant other. I somehow can sense the bomb going off but never in time to defuse it. The most recent example was by a lovely lady I was seeing for several months. She and I did not land on solid ground due to the conditions of our start. We shared many laughs, cries, and plenty about each other during that time. I was hesitant at first about her feelings at first, not knowing if they were true or just brought up by the circumstances of her previous relationship. We shared a wild, strong sexual appetite during the first half of our relationship. Facing personal dilemmas and financial difficulties; she pursued a second job in which she could balance herself with. She quickly got an offer to work a gentlemenâ€™s club as a coat checker. I saw the potential for disaster, keeping in mind her personality, state of mind, and lack of experience with the world. I feared that I might lose her in the process to some money throwing pig. Yet I needed to keep my personal fears in check and support who I regarded as my babe with anything she set her mind to. If this one thing could break us, than all my suspicions would be true; if they donâ€™t than we could move forward, take the leap into going public with our relationship.

Several weeks later we began to drift apart, we would ignore mutual calls and text. We did not see each other for days at a time. I began to worry about us, and so I began to call her more often, asking how she was and brought up ideas on trips we could take. It had little to no affect, as her eyes and perhaps even her heart were set on someone else whom she met at the gentlemenâ€™s club. One evening we got into an argument; and just like that, she asked me never to speak to her again; without any hesitation on my part, I hung up. The next day I told her we needed to talk; it was important that we clear the air. No response ever came that day, or the next day, or the day after. I tried once more and she quickly delivers the blow â€œI need timeâ€ which we all know to be â€œbreak-up modeâ€. I tried and tried again to see her so we could talk, all while sensing the inevitable blow that was soon to come. I would go to her apartment late at night, and she and her truck wouldnâ€™t be there. I knew that I had lost her at this point; or maybe just 99%. I took a chance and went to her one last time; even after she told me not to. I gave her everything that she ever wanted, with a promise to be there always. She wasnâ€™t giving in, she could not see being with me being better than the guy that she met recently. I knew that my words were barely chipping away at her wall. She was cold all throughout this and yet at the end she hugged me and showed me signs of remorse or sympathy. Before she walked back in I asked her, if in this last moment, we could turn things around and try to work this out with a clean slate. Her lips said no, but in her eyes, I saw a glimmer of yes. Despite what I felt, she gave me the closure I had asked her for. I wished her the best, and reminded her that I would always have her in my heart. Got in my car, and I had the most difficult drive of my life.

Michael

July 03, 2014 @ (New York City)

Tags: #BadBreakup, #ToxicRelationship, #BipolarDisorder, #Crazypeople

I met my ex-girlfriend on an online dating website and things got serious pretty quickly. She had bipolar disorder but was not getting treated. She lived with her parents and had a rocky relationship with her domineering and controlling mother. I always got the impression that her parents viewed my ex-girlfriend as a disappointment in comparison to her two older sisters who were both married with their own families. It seemed like her parents were happy with just about anybody who take my ex-girlfriend off her hands.

Initially I got along with her parents. I attended family gatherings, holidays and even went on a vacation with them. Over time, however, things changed. It started during a dinner we had with her parents. Her mother had a habit of scolding my ex-girlfriend about seemingly petty things. Even though it was an awkward situation that was uncomfortable, her mother was very unapologetic and instead got upset at me for not talking.

After two years together, we started to run into some problems. My ex-girlfriend was pressuring me into getting engaged, mainly so she could get my health insurance and get treated for her bipolar disorder. She even talked about eloping first so she didnâ€™t have to wait to claim my insurance. I started to feel that the relationship was a little one-sided. We practically spent all of our free time together and I was bothered she never showed much interest in any of my hobbies and was always very vocal about how stupid they were. Another problem were her mood swings which often lead to arguments, which occasionally took place in public places.

After we broke up, I went out on my own while my ex-girlfriend immediately jumped into another relationship. Also during that time, her parents sort of relented and allowed her to get treated for her bipolar disorder. After a few months, we both realized that we still had feelings for each other and decided to get back together, promising that things would be different.

At first not everyone was excited that we were back together, mainly her parents. They were upset because they believed her new boyfriend wouldâ€™ve eventually married her and because they believed I had caused my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings. My ex-girlfriendâ€™s mother was upset at me over an incident that happened a year ago that never occurred. Even though my ex-girlfriend believed her, I was suspicious of her mother.

Initially everything seemed to be going great. The relationship was a lot more balanced and because my ex-girlfriend was taking medication she wasnâ€™t getting those mood swings that plagued us last time. Around the holidays, things started to turn. I was driving my ex-girlfriend to the airport and my car got a flat tire. As I pulled into the gas station, she started screaming at me, like she did before she was taking her medication. It was so bad that the attendants felt sorry for me and gave me the replacement tire for free. Even though my ex-girlfriend wrote off the incident as holiday-related stress, it was the first indication that something wasnâ€™t right.

Over the next month, my ex-girlfriend continued to act erratically and decided to break up with me on Valentineâ€™s Day, only to change her mind the following day and the same pattern would occur every few weeks. Also during that time, my ex-girlfriend discovered that her mother had tricked her into not taking her bipolar medication and had told her doctor that she no longer needed them causing her doctor to believe she was misdiagnosed.

Eventually, my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mother began to act even more coldly towards me. During an argument over the phone, I overheard her mother screaming in background and demanded that she break up with me and get it over with. Every time I saw her mother, I tried to be friendly or polite to her but she either scowl at me or storm out of the room. She continued to badmouth me and even made bizarre accusations about me. She claimed that I wasnâ€™t serious about getting married and claimed that I was gay. She even told family members that she didnâ€™t think that I was a nice person.

By the spring, my ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings started to get worse. One night, my ex-girlfriend had too much to drink and she started grinding against me at a restaurant. After I quietly pushed her off of me and told her to stop, she started screaming at me and eventually pushed me out the door. When I returned, she continued to scream at me and had to be told to leave by the manager.

On the way home, I told her we were finished but she wanted to talk. She asked for another chance and promised to stop drinking. When I wouldnâ€™t reconsider, she got upset demanded that I get out of her car and kicked me in my ribs and threw a half empty wine bottle out the window. The following day, she changed her mind and tried to convince me to give her another chance. After she got her friends to contact me, I felt like I had no choice but to give in.

In the following weeks. My ex-girlfriendâ€™s mood swings got worse and she even got pushy and demanding. When I tried breaking up with her again, she again forced me to reconsider and sometimes held me hostage in her house until I reconsidered. Personally I felt trapped. When my ex-girlfriend and I got back together, this was not what I had envisioned. Now I felt depressed and noticed that I had gained weight.

I decided that I needed an outlet for my feelings and decided to sign up for an obstacle course race. My ex-girlfriend immediately thought it was a dumb idea and was upset that I ask her permission. She also hated that I joined a Sunday softball league with a friend, even though she worked on that day. She always expected me to stay home and meet with her after she got off of work.

The night before the race, my ex-girlfriend decided to rehash an old argument about how she felt that I wasnâ€™t committed to her and believed her mother was about me. The argument continued as I was driving her home and when I tried to break up with her again, she lost her temper and started hitting me over the head with a book as I was driving. Afterwards, I was forced to change my mind after she refused to leave my car. The following week, I finally broke up with my ex-girlfriend after I cancelled my plans with her and she furiously berated me on the phone. Unlike last summer, this was for good.

In the months that followed, my ex-girlfriend continued to try to contact me.
Sometimes she scolded me for breaking up with her and occasionally she begged for another chance. She even would scream at remaining mutual friends when they wouldnâ€™t tell her any information they had on me. I also learned that she was in a serious car accident that some of her friends believe might been a suicide attempt. Eventually, she stopped trying to contact me and I learned that she had started dating another guy and was once again taking bipolar medication.

As for me, I rediscovered how to have fun again. I made a lot of new friends on the softball team I joined that summer. It helped that we won the championship and I ended up making the game winning catch. I also lost 50 pounds and have since competed in 3 more obstacle course races. I even started dating again and am currently in the early stages of a new relationship. Itâ€™s been fun and I can't remember the last time I felt this happy or excited about my life.

Nessa

June 20, 2014 @ (philly)

Tags: bad breakup

I have had the same boyfriend for five years I left him for three months because I needed a break to focus on school.
He would hit me up everyday begging for me to take him back and he was sorry for treating me badly. After three months I gave in and took him back. Everything was going well until I found out he was talking to someone else which I didnt mind we werent together and he said that he didnt tell her we were back together and he would end it now. I trusted him and he claimed he ended it. It never ended comes to show that he was in a realtionship with her a month before we got back together he fought for her and denied me. He said hes been single the past five years, I am crazy, He doesn't want me, that i ruined his life and all these things to everyone. He actually denied me when I gave him everything I had I sacrificed so much for him career wise, school wise, family wise, and he broke my heart. He denies it all still but still reaches out to me and says hes sorry and claims he is alone. The girl told me stop trying to steal her man and posts pictures of them everyday I HATE HIM he blaimed me for everything he claimed if i never left him this wouldnt have happened to begin with what hurts the most is he was the one i planned to do everything with and the girl claims i was stilling her man they only been together two months and he takes her to family functions and i feel like i lost out he calls me still and as much as i want to tell the other girl look what ur man is doing cuz she boast to everyone he chose her n he is living with her after a month n he denies it all when there are piks everywhere and my name is destroyed now and my reputation i never deserved that I stopped answering him and deleted him everywhere but keeps claiming he needs me he is alone suffering but is in a relationship with her I just want to feel better I cant believe he would deny me :'(he told her he was living with his mom when he has his own place and because of me she found out about his place and he started to take her there he just replaced me n the girl flaunts it every chance she getshe hit me abused me verbally emotionally he cheated on me so I left him he keeps trying to hit me up but is still with the girl he cheated on me with I don't want him but she's insecure cuz he still wants me n suck of her so she keeps harassing me in every possible way I blocked her everywhere but she found old sexts ok his phone n saying she gonna use them against me how do I cope I've prayed n prayed my heart is so heavy

Abby

May 25, 2014 @ (New York)

Tags: Bad breakup, cheating, jerk, karma, heartbreaker

I met a friend of a friend, let's call him Tom, at a music festival. We hit it off straightaway, had a lot in common, and things were going really well. After three months he was talking about us moving in together and getting married!

So we had been together for five months, and everything was going great- we hardly ever argued, hung out all the time and we thought we had found The One. Then I found out I was pregnant. It was a HUGE surprise (we had been very careful!) but we wanted to spend our lives together anyway so we were happy. Sadly, on Christmas Eve when I was 8 weeks pregnant I suffered a miscarriage. This is when he turned into a total d**k.

At the hospital he was totally ignoring me while I was waiting to get checked over. When I got called to be seen by the doctor, he said he needed the toilet and stayed outside smoking until I was done and came looking for him. For the next week, he was avoiding me- wouldn't answer my calls, would only reply to texts to tell me he was too busy to see me. On New Years Eve, I went over to his house where he told me he just wanted to stay home and play his xbox. I told him that was OK, but could we go to his room so I could lay down (I was still suffering symptoms from the miscarriage). Then he told me if I was just going to be miserable and lay there I should just go home (wow!). I went home and for another week he ignored me and avoided me til finally he said we could meet up to 'talk' and I knew he wanted to end it. On the day, I was waiting at a bar for him and after an hour he still hadn't shown up. He text me saying this was because he was waiting for an emergency plumber. Then my brother called, and told me he was out at a nightclub and Tom was there drinking and partying with some girls. I was heartbroken, and simply left Tom a voicemail saying we were over. At 3am, Tom called me and started shouting and swearing at me down the phone for being a bitch and telling my brother 'all of our business'. Apparently my brother had politely told the girls Tom was partying with all about me, and how Tom had stood up his girlfriend during a miscarriage, and of course the girls were not impressed! Tom called me again the next day AND the day after that, because he wanted to make sure that I knew we were over. Thanks a bunch!

It's been over a year since that break up and I'm still not ready to date again. Although I found out that a month after we broke up, Tom crashed his car when he was drinking and driving- no one was hurt, but he lost his license and his job. Karma's a bitch!

Shavel

May 16, 2014 @ (Florida)

Tags: Heartbroken

I've been with this guy name Nicholas for 1 1/2 years. We met in middle school, I didn't really notice him or liked him. It all started our sophomore year of high school. I didn't even know he went to my school but anyways we end up having my favorite subject together. He was just a friend to me, nothing more, nothing less. One day my teacher sat us together and we was watching a movie. I felt this weird feeling towards him that I never felt before. I wanted to hold his hand and touch him. To me he was unattractive. Maybe because I was trying to get back with my ex at the moment and still had feelings for. We both played basketball btw. One day after my basketball game my ex told me he didn't wanna talk to me no more ect. So I decided to call Nicholas because I was lonely and wanted to talk to someone to not think about my ex. I called him and he was at a basketball game watching another school play. He went outside just to talk to me. I started flirting with him without knowing it.
The next morning I went to school and I couldn't believe wat I've did last night. I didn't like him nor wanna talk to him.
It felt so wired in that class and I usually spoke a lot in that class and now I started not to.
2 months passed by and he wanted to go out with me but I would always tell him I'm not ready to date or I'm still hung up on my ex but he still waited for me to be ready.
We talked for 2 months before making it official. He asked me out on January 8 .
I always been bad lucked with guys so this one I was scared to give my all. I wasn't really into it like he was but after a couple months I grew to love him. He was my everything, my best friend, just my world and I was his. Not a day goes by that I didn't get a good morning / goodnight text. He made everyday worth being happy for. He made me realize a lot in myself. We shared everything. I use to give him money and he did the same to me, we use to cook each other lunch, just simply take care of each other. Everyday was a happy day for me and him. But u might be wondering it seems like u guys love each other a lot , y would u guys break up? Well I have a lot of insecurity because of my past relationships, I never thought I was good enough or pretty enough to be his gf. He told me stop thinking like that Cus I'm the only women he sees and loves. I met his family. He showed me off to the world. Say I was his queen ect. He motivated me to do better in the sports I play. We filled out scholarships for each other. Motivated each other in everything we did. He have put up with a lot I've done. He was tierd of me putting ppl in our relationship, assuming he was doing things behind my back( cheating) which he never did nor talk to someone different but I was so insecure. He got fed up and left me and now I've realize what I've lost. I've lost my motivator, best friend, my happiness. I pray everyday we get back together. We've been broken up for a week now and it feels like a year. My room is full of things he bought me. Sometimes he only had enough money for a haircut but he gave me that money so I can eat and he don't get money often. I just wanna show him that my insecurities are gone and my assumption too. Just us breaking up made me realize how much I needed to change but I told him I would always change and I never did but the time I really changed he doesn't believed me because I've said it a bunch of times. I would like for u guys to pray for us to work things out because ever since I lost him, I've lost my happiness, my motivation, and most importantly the love of my life

Jada

May 11, 2014 @ (Pennsylvania )

Tags: Horrible, wasted time, love lost

Me and my boyfriend were going great the first 4 months were amazing but the last 4 months were hell. We stayed together for 8 months. I loved him with all of me, every vein, every hair and every goose bump. All of me loved all of him, but he didn't really ever care. In the end I was the one grieving.

Brooklyn

April 12, 2014 @ (Texas)

Tags: whateven

So the guy I have been seeing for a couple of years (my first love, lost my virginity to) stopped texting me for three days. I was really worried until on the third day he responded and said "Alexis, I'm done. Please leave me alone." and then blocked my number. I don't know which is worse... the text, or the fact that my name is not even close to Alexis.

AnnLandy

April 09, 2014 @ (Houston, TX)

Tags: Anti-Break-Up

My story is fairly simple. I have been seeing a man since New Year's. It got serious quickly, we were spending every night together at his house or my house., and I was enjoying the ride. At the time we started going out, I had just lost my job, and was in the middle of an incredibly stressful time. He was a nice distraction, and I admired his ability to overlook my declining finances and my uncertain professional future. Then, I go an interview for my dream job. When I told him how excited I was, he responded, "Honey, you've said that already." The day of the interview, he didn't even call or text to see how it went. When I took temp jobs to pay my bills, he got annoyed that my schedule was so unpredictable. When my car needed a repair, he offered me the money, implying that it was gift, just because cared about me. Two weeks later, during an argument, he demanded to know when he would "see that money again". Recently, he texted me that he would prefer it if I stopped calling or messaging him, leaving all communication strictly at his discretion. Then I received the following text, "I miss you too, but I feel trapped. You are incredibly intense." I blocked his calls and texts, deleted his contact information from my phone, blocked his e-mail address, and dumped our entire text thread from my memory card. I am packing his belongings and shipping them back. Frankly, I don't care what he does with the clothes and personal belongings that are at his place. The only item I truly care about is my glasses. And maybe my dog's bowls. Frankly, I have reached the point of apathy. I have just decided to vanish.

A H

March 24, 2014 @ (Karachi, Pakistan)

Tags: Bad and unfortunate breakup

My girlfriend and I started going out three years ago and fell hard for each other. Even head over heels sound like an understatement. I am a 29 year old guy and I have always been a closed off person but when she and I started going out, she brought out the best in me. She made me feel like the king of the world and that I could achieve anything in this entire universe. Right around the time we started going out my father was diagnosed with throat cancer. It shook my entire existence. To find the guy you always looked up to and the authority figure in your life to be so timid and helpless. I was shaken up, then I lost my job, by profession I am a graphics designer and illustrator. We were extremely frustrated. And we decided to talk to our parents about us because we wanted to get married. A note here that she's from a well-to-do family and I am from a middle class family so the social status and lack of financial backing played a very important role when we tried talking to her parents. You need to understand another thing that in our culture we respect and listen to our parents' wishes because of how much they've done for us. and after talking to them they got furious. They took her cellphone, grounded her and we didn't talk for over a month. I know it sounds childish, but this is how our culture works. But she was resilient woman and she stood by me through all this and so did I. We spent two more years after that. My father passed away last May. And my financial situation kept getting worse and worse. Now I am at a stage where I am literally left with nothing in my account. Don't get me wrong she didn't drain me. But I was so distracted by my father's death and the trouble at her end that I couldn't pick myself up. So, a few months back she got a proposal and her father agreed to it and we discussed that since things are going in a certain way and we can't afford to hurt her parents, so we decided to break it off. I know that she loves me and she knows that I love her. I mean I have faced such problems in my life that it's beyond imagination. But this is worst feeling of all. Because I have never loved anyone or anything this much. But she's now talking to this guy her parents introduced to her and I know it's killing her but she's doing it. I want to salute this woman here and want to tell her that I love you and I will always love you. You were the best thing in my life. But I have these memories that I will take with them where ever I go.
It's funny that two people, who love each other dearly and wholly are pulled apart.

Nathalie

March 21, 2014 @ (Canada)

Tags: bad breakup, sad, lost , confused , need help , romeo and juliette

I have been with my bf for almost three years. He is my second and I am completely in love with him. I hid our relationship from my parents but after a year they found out. They're very strict and told me they wanted to meet him. After they met him, they made my life miserable and told me I had to break up with him. But I didn't want I was just getting closer and closer to him. He was truly my soulmate. Today, I am miserable because we still haven't slept together because I want to be a virgin until I get married but he doesn't he's 20 and wants to lose it already with me because he loves me. I don't blame him he's been so patient with me and I feel bad. But in my religion, I can't sleep with anyone until I get married. He told me that if we don't do it he doesn't see us last another 2 years. My parents are telling me every day to break up with him because they don't see him in my future and will never accept him because I deserve better. So here I am, thinking to myself how I'm going to break up with the person I love. I know I will be depressed for a very long time but it's better to break up now then to wait longer right?