Searching for "mom"

159 Results For 'mom'

David Pheng

October 10, 2016 @ (Cambodia)

A month ago, I was deeply in love with this sweet tough guy whom I nicknamed him "Blueberry". The relationship we had was like an electromagnetic force turned into flames and sparks, although sadly it only lasted for a month. It all started in the late summer and ended in the early monsoon. It was the kind of love that was unexpected and overwhelming, and we had no idea why we ended up falling in love at first sight. Meh, you wouldn't believe me, right? Yup, I wouldn't believe myself, either.

I had always thought that the idea of being in love at first sight was "foolish" until it happened to me. He was brave enough to hold my hand, walking in the pouring rain and whispering to me that he'd never met someone like me before. At that blissful moment, I caught him looking and smiling at me dazzlingly, laughing like a little kid. Oh, you know what? His smile was infectious; his deep husky voice kept me interested in whatever he talked about; and his large and tall body kept me safe and warm. I knew he also liked me...and I was happy.

Time passes; feelings change; memories fade; people leave but hearts never forget. We broke up out of the blue. It hurt like hell when he told me he tried to make the relationship work but it didn't, because he made me fall so deep in love with him. It was the moment I knew I'd just lost a soulmate whom I could talk to for hours without any pretense, laughing at his jokes without acting like he was a funny guy (because he was one hell of a funny guy) and sharing secrets to each other. I felt like I'd lost someone more than a close friend, although we only spent a month together. We'd had plans to be done and promises to be made until we found out that we weren't meant to be together in the end.

I would be lying if I said that I was fine going through the breakup...but I guess, it was okay, because I kept reminding myself that all I've always wanted is for him to be happy even if I'm not the cause of his happiness. The combination of anger, guilt, and revenge built up inside me has finally subsided. I admit I was so mad and depressed, leaving him numerous messages and calls...because I wanted him to be there when my heart was broken and fire was burning inside me. I couldn't sleep and eat well for several weeks; I lost some pounds; I looked up "how to mend a broken heart" articles on the internet, yet they couldn't help much as my heart still wanted what it wanted, although my head tried to prevent me from going back to what'd shattered my heart into pieces. The funny thing was I even cried at work when he instantly popped up inside my mind.

Buried deep inside my head, his presence was still there. I saw the invisible him every where we used to go together. As much as I tried to erase him from my mind, I only kept hurting myself by doing so. It took like a month to get better from it. However I'm in the process of healing my heart and bringing back the old happy me, deep down inside I still miss him and wish him all the best. I love him. I still do. But I'm letting him go if that's what makes him happier. Thanks for all the memories which will be kept and locked forever in my heart.

Stephen King once said, "Some birds are not meant to be caged, that's all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go, or when you open the cage to feed them they somehow fly out past you. And the part of you that knows it was wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices, but still, the place where you live is that much more drab and empty for their departure."

Delta

October 02, 2016 @ (Southern Russia )

Tags: Bad Breakup

So when I was in 10th grade I saw this girl in Engineering class and she was my first Crush ever, I thought she was perfect, She had this long beautiful hair, breathtaking smile, cute, a little bit shy, challenging, caring and had some little knowledge about video gaming which was my weak spot. This was also my first love, I tried to flirt with her but I was a very insecure person at that time, I was pretty much obese (115 KG,253 lbs) and I was the probably the ugliest guy in the class :(, my flirting skills were a disaster and she eventually had a boyfriend from another class, they were together for 4 months and after that they broke up.
I dreamt about this girl for a whole year and I told myself that in 11th grade I will make something out of myself and I will GET HER.
Starting from February 2016 and till July 2016 I lost 37 KG (that's 81 pounds) and went from 115 to 78 KG (253 lbs to 171 lbs), I lost weight for my own private reasons but one of the main one was for my crush. The WHOLE SCHOOL was in complete shock of my body transformation (I'm talking about teachers, students, janitors, community workers, cooks, friends) and I was voted student of the year in my school, I've never felt this much happiness in a long time, I've felt completely on top of the world, my confidence rose up and I felt that I needed to flirt with my crush, but that failed too.
Eventually I found a job in my school and I worked there as a painter (I painted the walls, classrooms and etc... for the school year) to pay truck driving license. And then one day my CRUSH showed up in the school and literally started talking to me straight away, I was really busy with my work and I told her if she can hold on just for a few minutes but she ignored me and we started talking, the conversation went deep in a matter of minutes, I though to myself ''SO FAR SO GOOD'' and we literally spent the next 2 months (June and July) talking to each other on the phone ever SINGLE day. one day when I felt the right time to quit my job, I told her that I wanted to hang out with her (was my first time talking to a girl over whatsupp) and we've set the meeting in my city.
During August we hanged out every day and we felt closer and closer with each meeting. During the beginning of 12th grade (the final senior year) I told her that I loved her over the phone and she said she loves me too. It was the most magical moment that I've heard over the phone. The next morning we went to quiet place in my school yard near the teachers parking lot and we kissed, it was my first kiss EVER and especially with my crush, it was such a special moment in my life and I will never forget it, I've felt completely happy. We were the most popular couple in my school apparently because people had known me for being a single guy for my whole life.
After a week and 4 days my nightmares became to reality, we broke up.
I wasn't depressed but I felt sad as fuck man, we had a fight the night before and its just a long story, things weren't going great for us, so we decided to break up.
I was very sad with myself, and I was being told that time heals everything, and I shouldn't be upset because we were barely together for a month,but it doesn't matter if the relationship lasted for a week, I've felt heartbroken and pretty sad with myself.
She on the other hand felt completely good after the break up and told me that she had 2 boyfriends before me and she is going to chase for another one and I need to do the same, find the one, she told me that I will fine the love of my life but to never give up, even in my darkest moments of my life.
I will never forget these words that she said to me the day after our break up. But the awesome memories we had together still taunt me till this very minute. And the worst thing is, I pretty much regret the decision to leave her.
I've came to the point that not anything that shines has to be golden.
I feel very disappointed because I've wasted so many energy over her for the past 2 years.
But I need to look at the bright sight, this short relationship taught me that to make sure I will never do any mistakes in my next serious relationship, life is one hell of a tough journey, and we need to keep going, keep looking forward and never give up.

Sophie

July 11, 2016 @ (Los Angeles)

Tags: Taking a break

I met him in december, 2015 at a party and we were both attracted to each other and ended up cuddling a bit. I was about to leave for college, but decided to stay as I wanted to have a relationship with him, eventhough I knew that chances are we might break up, but that was a risk I was willing to take! So I applied and got into to college close by to where he lives. Due to his busy schedule, we only saw each other every two weeks and I know that this wasn't much, but I loved him so much and wanted things to work out. I hoped that during the summer we would have more time to spend together. May came along and I found that he had to study during the summer for exams he had in August, but he said that he would make time to see me.

We're in the middle of July and I haven't heard from him in two weeks and haven't seen him in almost a month! I was in Italy atm and asked to meet up with him to discuss what was going on...he read the message but never replied, so I was forced by message to ask him for a break! He replied agreeing to it and said that at the moment he is absorbed with other things such as his studies and that after his exams we would have time to reflect and meet up to discuss the final decision. I was devasted as I still love him and want to be with him and the fact that he didn't fight to keep me, made me realise that chances are he could have lost interest!

Although I hope that after his exams we would get back together, but if it doesn't I am going to have to take time to move on.

Prvnce

March 13, 2016 @ (Florida )

Tags: bad breakups, heart broken

Growing up, I've never had a sexual preference. I was always afraid to tell people because I knew no one would understand. Then my 10th grade year in highschool, I met the perfect being, the "love of my life". We started talking December 28th and made it official January 1st at 12:04. We've had a bumpy road. I always was so used to being heart broken that I didn't know how to love anymore or even appreciate it when it's shown to me. But he sat there and he waited for me to open up to him and he was stern when he needed to be. Truth of the fact is, I wouldn't have this stronger state of mind if it wasn't for him. He was such an inspiration to my life. In my sophomore days he was a senior and was off to college. We was in a log distance relationship. He stayed in West Virginia and I stayed in Florida. We was going together for 8 months before I left him, because I thought I haven't loved him anymore. Then later that September we got back together and saw each other in person for the first time in October. We made a bond like no other. And one thing I remember is when he told me he don't ever wanna live without me by his side..."I need you in my life" He would say. We was going so fine until the day he got in college. I got less attention and began to beg him and antagonize him because I didn't understand that being in college is time consuming. He then began to pay his attention to other guys. After we had a talk about it we was fine for our 1 year anniversary "one year down forever to go." I still remember him saying. Little did we know forever was just about to end...as time flew by he began to loose interest in me. He would call me too gay and tell me he don't like the way I dance or the way I dress. He'll say he didn't like my body being a certain way, but he would always be attracted to other guys that was just the same as what he didn't want in me. He would like their pics, text and call them. And we've had multiple falling outs about it. Finally I understood that he felt I didn't appreciate him is why he was distant from me. I gave in to my faults and offered to fix the situation. He agreed but would never let me. He would either ignore me, be rude to me or just act like I don't even exist. Or like I'm just an associate. This has been going on for months. A week ago he said he wasn't in love with me anymore. Today, March 13, 2016 I am a single broken hearted man. We've been through the hell and back together. We've lost friends for each other. His dad won't talk to him and my mom rebuke me. We both don't get along with our families because of the way they treat us. I've never had a shoulder to lean on. He's all I have...now I have nothing...once again my heart is broken and he don't even care anymore. I've cried so many times and he didn't care. I don't know what to do. I'm hurt. AGAIN...

Prvnce

March 13, 2016 @ (Florida )

Tags: bad breakups, heart broken

Jadine

February 14, 2016 @ (Sask)

Tags: sad, valentines day, asshole

It's quite funny actually, as I have already posted on this site before with a brief submission on Jan 28, 2014. My first post was about my first boyfriend. We ended up getting back together on and off for about another 8 months before things finally ended for good (thank god!)
Looking back, I don't know why I was so sad. I just think it was because we had dated for 2 years, and he knew me inside out. But I wasn't serious about him, I know I could never end up with someone like him. After the breakup, I didn't expect to get into a relationship for a long time, maybe years. But only a few short months later my dream guy came along, someone I never thought would notice me.
He was amazing; 6'4", incredibly handsome, polite, smart, sweet, funny. I was in shock. I don't know if I ever had anyone on such a high pedestal before. And he wanted me back. Life, at that time, seemed like a dream come true, and I think that's where I ruined myself. I made HIM my dream. But I loved him so much and I was still in awe of everything he did. And all was well until moving away to a different city so I could go to university after only 4 months of dating.
Things changed. He changed. His true colors came out while living together. A once caring, dreamy person became cold, distant and indifferent. I had gained 15 pounds in the 6 months after university, and it apparently caused a huge problem for him (as he told me- "I would treat you better if you were thinner"). He would only return some of my texts, and got annoyed of me easily. The first 5 months living together were difficult, feeling like I was always reaching for him and he was just pulling away. I cried all the time. Looking back, after moving in that's mostly what I did with my time.
We've been broken up for a month now, but still living together because we signed into a lease. I've been trying to keep it civil but he seems to like hurting me constantly. A day doesn't go by without some sort of remark like "I enjoy this place when you're not here" or "you're not going to lose weight just watching a show about vegetables". After we agreed to try and be friends. Obviously it's hardest for me as I still care a great deal and he doesn't care at all, but yet I still try. I wake up everyday knowing that there's just going to be another heartbreaking moment. And every so often I think back to how it was in the beginning, everything was so perfect. I didn't want it to end up like this. What helps me to keep moving forward is to look at his attitude, he's treating me like dirt. And for what? All I did in our relationship was want to grow our love into something huge, but he couldn't see my value. I ask him what went wrong, he comes up with minuscule excuses such as "you never made me a friendship bracelet when you said you would" or "you turned on the light when I was sleeping". It's all a sad excuse to hide behind the real truth that he's shallow, and that once he saw me for my real self, without the nice body and makeup and clothes, he decided I wasn't good enough anymore. And i'm so glad that i'm stronger than I was 2 years ago, because no i'm not as sad as I was then, I've grown. I still cry sometimes, but I have to remember that I have the good heart, and important attributes to make love last, and him not being able to see that is HIS problem.

Allyson

February 09, 2016 @ (NYC)

Tags: Bad Break up, Dominican Moms, Black Girl Problems, Caribbean roots, NYC, Harlem,

I met him while browsing through people I may know on FB. I was 20 he was 19. His name was P. Sounds weird but we began dating before we even met in person 5 months later.
It was love at first sight literally...I've heard this saying and felt it was so corny and not possible BUT i'm a believer.
We both were struggling with our personal lives at the time of meeting so we filled those gaps which made us love even harder. Eventually, things started to decline. When it came to being emotionally supportive for me, and financial cracks he would always disappear. Perhaps after putting in 3 years I thought things would get better but they didn't. It didn't help that his mom was an older Dominican women. She hated that I was black, she hated everything about me. Over time things took its tole.
I recently decided to break things off finally a few days ago and throw in the towel. Not because I wanted to but because I felt I had to. I was physically attacked by his mom and assaulted while he stood near by and did nothing. With a huge open cut on my face, blood and all strangers bypassing were more concerned than he seemed.
The police got involved and he wasn't by my side and it was here when I realized. The person I met 3-4 years ago was not the person I'm with now.
I'll be the first to admit upbringing, infidelity, and insecurities drove this relationship to the ground. It's only been 3 days of feeling alone and empty out of the 3 and half year I was with him. He left me alone and in debt. Not even enough money for me to feed our cat that we got together. Its depressing but I plan on remaining strong.
Not to mention he treated me this way and I'm 2 and half months pregnant. I never understood how men could plant their seeds and not even feed the mouth of the women who carry their seeds. Im going to be strong and will raise this baby alone. He or she will be my new happiness. It break my hear that by law I can't just up and leave and at any point if he wanted to be involved he'd have every right to. Even though he doesn't deserve it. But this is life and the society we live it. So I'll just pray.

Lolita

February 09, 2016 @ (india)

Tags: breakup is good

I have known him from 8th class. He was the most flirtatious boy in my school.He was always behind my friend. I just hated him that time. We were in different classes until 10. Then for three years we were classmates. In plus one we both were absent for biology test paper.I was ill and he was lazy. However next day teacher prepared a new question paper. Only two of us were in the classroom. That was the first time he noticed me and asked me to show the answers. But i didn't help him. Because i just hated him.But after that we started talking and towards the end of school life we became best friends. He always flirted with other girls but was a genuine friend to me which sparked my soul. After school we joined different colleges.I felt very lonely those days and i don't had any phone for communication. After one year i was the one who proposed him. To my surprise he said he too feel the same for me. I was in cloud nine. Only communication was through messages. So yes somehow it was a long distance relation. We were from different religion which is a big problem in India even now. So we had a doubt about our future. Anyhow i loved him wholeheartedly. I thought he too loves me badly. But then i heard the gossip. I have a best friend from school other than my lover. he told me that my lover is having an affair with another girl. I didn't took it seriously then. But slowly i found he is not talking to me much. Then one day he told me that he loves someone else. How do you feel when you hear something like this from the one whom you love most? Yes it was terrible. It broke my heart and soul. I was numb for almost one year. Nothing was okay. It was my final year in college and i got very low marks.I never hid anything from my parents. I was afraid to face them. I was feeling very guilty. I was not okay until my post graduation. After that i gave myself a reality check. In between this i forgot about my family,my dreams and myself. It's been four years after breakup. I changed myself completely. I have lot of dreams to achieve. I am on a chasing mode now. My wrong and right decisions made myself complete. Now i don't fell any guilt or something anymore. But after that i never fallen in love. Even an infatuation scare the hell out of me. I am happy as single. I have a word for those broken hearts out there. Let him or her go. Tomorrow is always a new day. These moments will never come back. Be happy and always stay with your family.
Thanks for reading (i'm little bit weak in English.Sorry for that)

Sam

February 05, 2016 @ (Malaysia)

Tags: Breakups that hurt alot

Lets just take this as day 1, a healing stage, a blessing in disguise, making me stronger in time to come.
And so I just broke up with the love of my life, and this was happening again. I lost once, and now I lost another. What more could I sincerely ask for, when I had everything in the world to begin with. She's the first person that comes to my mind when I wake up, she's the girl I would be more than willing to buy gifts for. She meant the world to me and I had no qualms about anything. I was happy. I was really happy with my life and I didn't dare to ask for more. I didn't want to. There wasn't a need to. I only knew that I was in love. Deeply in love.
I am 19, and I know that there are cases in different pockets of the world that have been through this ordeal, probably much worse than mine. After all it's been 15 months only, nowhere close to marriages that have lasted for years (what a bitter moment for people like us). While I know we kind of ended on a good note and we could still be friends in the coming years, how am I supposed to treat her as a good friend, when I always saw her as my coming wife?
My mind's in a mess now, and Chinese New Year is around the corner. I really hope I recover soon enough to hide it from everyone else. I don't want my loved ones to be upset for me, I need to stay strong. I will be strong.

And all I need is strength in me.
I need you to be with me, god.

Sozinho

January 18, 2016 @ (Brasil)

Tags: Sad breakup

I met her 4 years ago, i remember it like it was yesterday. I was at home when one of my friends called me and asked if i wanted to go out with him, as soon as i arrived he introduced me to this girl. At the very first moment when i saw here my heart just stood still. She was beautiful. We talked just a few minutes but it was enough. Later that day, at night time, she came to me in Facebook and Skype; from that day on we talked everyday, for hours and days we shared our love. At that time, i couldn't see my life without her. All i was able to think was about her, her day, what she possibly been doing or thinking. I would have done everything to make her happy. When i kissed her, i felt peace. Every kiss was magic, everytime i touched her skin i could feel my heart beating like it was for the last time. But, last month, we met a few days before the new year's eve and we kissed for the last time, i felt nothing. I just had a sudden realization. Our love was over. I gave her a hug and a kiss on the forehead while i whispered "Be happy, i'm sorry."We haven't talked to each other since then. I miss her. I feel the loneliness and regrets consumes me. At the same time i want her back, i know i can't love her as she deserve to be loved. I'm sorry.