Searching for "think"

381 Results For 'think'

Lynette

May 14, 2011 @ (Los Angeles)

Tags: Liar

18 months of my life that I can't get back. Funny thing is that when we were together, everything seemed wonderful. He was loving, attentive, and sweet. It was the first time since my painful divorce that I let myself really trust and fall in love. What a mistake!

He told me that he was divorced. He said he was living in his friend's guest house- even took me there! Of course, he wasn't. They were all lies. You know where this is going.... Abruptly, his wife calls me. I guess that one day he called my office on their house phone and she got suspicious. I eventually found out that he bought a separate cell phone just to call me so that his wife wouldn't find out. Anyhow, his wife and I had an interesting conversation on the phone. She actually seemed to be a genuinely nice person- I feel sorry for her. I was also really upset that I unknowingly caused her so much pain- having also experienced a cheating spouse before.

Aparently, he had been lying to me all along, and had cheated on her before. He was still living with his wife. And lying to both of us, using me. When he finally did call me, it was to simply tell me (with a flat affect like he was ordering a pizza)that he was going back to his wife and he asked me not to call her (too late, she called me first) because otherwise, I would be the one responsible for breaking up their family if I spoke with her. Unbelievable! He tried to place the blame on me! And he was afraid that I would tell her what he had been up to. WOW.

Glad I found this out though, imagine if his wife had really left him/divorced him? Now I think that all I was to him was his backup plan in case she did leave. And he probably would have turned around and done the same thing to me later- cheated. Still really angry though. Angry that someone could be so cold hearted and just blatenly lie. Not sure I can trust again now.

Golden614

May 06, 2011 @ (AZ)

Tags: love1

We had been together for three years. Three happy years. We laughed all the time, went places together, shared dreams and thoughts. Had awesome debates. We didn't always see eye to eye, obviously, but when we argued it was productive. There was compromise on both parts and I FELT so loved and so lucky. I looked at other people's relationships and couldn't understand all the drama and strife. We worked through our problems and were steadily making progress and both happily moving forward in our relationship. So much laughter and joy, any issue was rare because we got along so well. And then about a week before it happened, maybe two, I noticed he was very distant. I chalked it up to work stress and so many other things. I didn't push, thinking he would talk about it when he was ready. I know how I feel when I get the blues, I don't want everyone pushing me and asking me what's wrong, ad nauseum. He called me one day while he knew I was at work and gave me the dreaded line, "We need to talk." He said he didn't love me. He wasn't looking for "the one." We weren't compatible, etc etc etc. This from the man who only a week before had purchased a trip over seas with me and was talking about our future and telling me how special I was, I mean I literally had the wind knocked out of me. Now he says he wants to be friends. I love him but I'm not stupid. I don't want to be with someone who could flip on me so quickly, who would lead me on for three years, someone who apparently doesn't love me. But, my heart just can't seem to catch up with my brain. I see that he had an attack of commitment-phobia. But, how can it be true that he would stay with me for so long, that we could both be SO happy and he doesn't love me? I am having trouble moving on because I just can't wrap my head around it. And this whole, "We can still be friends," mess. Yeah, right. That has to some selfish ploy to alleviate his guilt feelings. And he tells me things like, "People break up all the time." "People change." It seems like the only thing that changed was how he acted toward me. And people do break up all the time, but so suddenly? So arbitrarily? He said he has never been with anyone as long as he has been with me and that no one was so immersed in his life, that he had never been so close with anyone else. Ever. He still wants me to be a part of his life. But he doesn't love me? He has loved other girlfriends, but not me? I'm lost. I just don't get it.

KMO

April 29, 2011 @ (NY)

Tags: never giving up, lost, confused

It could have been a year. it was 5 days short of a year.

To start off, He was the best, i wouldn't even think twice about that. This was his first relationship so It took us awhile to get comfortable around each other, but after a couple months he was like my best friend. We did a lot together and i thought he was happy, he told me these were the best moments of him life and they were mine. The previous boyfriends i had were assholes. They didn't care about me at all, but He did, which set him aside from the rest and i thought he was different.

About 2 months ago, he started to go into these pensive states where he began to doubt his love for me, but he always talked to me about it and he always decided that his doubts were wrong. I didn't know what i had done to him to do this to me, but he'd never tell me.

Anyways, 2 weeks ago, He came back from vacation and he was sad and quiet. He said he wasnt sure if he could balance school work and me, but i reasoned with him because i love him and i wanted to be with him no matter what and i thought everything was fine. We kissed and he seemed normal, we hung out after school and He seemed just like he had before he left. However, the next 4 days he didnt talk to me, he treated me like a friend and he wouldn't tell me what was wrong. I felt like crap because all of that trust and friendship that we had build wasn't there anymore, and he wouldn't allow me to talk him out of his pensive state. After those 4 days, he agreed to talk to me, and told me he just didn't want to be in a relationship and that he didn't love me anymore. I was in tears, but he just stood there and watched. He isn't the type of person to just watch me in pain, but he starred at me. Before he left, he said he wanted to remain friends, and that he'd try to keep some stuff we normally did together the same. But nothings the same anymore. He feels awkward about everything and i feel like i've lost everything we've ever had together and its literally all i ever think about. I feel like he's lost, but he avoids the subject and he just says we're never getting back together. He always gives me different reasons for breaking up with me, and i just dont understand. Maybe i'm just in denial but i feel like theres a piece of him that still loves me and i just wished he'd give me another chance, we were happy. I truly love him more than anyone and i refuse to give up.

Violet

April 19, 2011 @ (NYC)

Tags: relationships, break up, love, hurt, pain, choices

'After 8 years in a relationship you realize there comes a point you ask yourself. Did I just miss out on "my life" and live someone else's or should I move on to the future and make this"our life". Well after 8 years you obviously share almost every moment together. Living together, same friends, family is involved, your best friends, you have animals together, or even children, both have great careers, may even own a business together, you have this life together. Which are all positive things that you want in a relationship. Thats the outter shell of a relationship looks and sounds wonderful. The inner part of that shell is what matters right? Well when you have to deal with BAGGAGE. Emotional problems, affectionate problems, ego problems, privacy problems, boundary problems,"my own" space problems, or "I need space". So how invovled are you supposed to get? Then there is the other part of the relationship is where you waiting for this person to change and do all the pro''s and con''s of each other. Yet you LOVE this person more than anything in the world and want to be with this person more than anything in the world. Its like where is the fun and love and when you are looking to change and figure out this person everyday. Where do you find the time to build a future when you are worried about the past or the right now? Then again, you want to work it out so badly because you love this person so much. Then it goes back to the beginning question am I missing out on my life or am I worried about their life? What to do? Big risk. Lose out on love and may never feel this love again or live life they way you want and hope to be in love like that again.Therefore, I chose the hard way; the challenge after long 8 years I chose to leave the one I love its been a year and I still love him. It was one of the most hardest things I have ever done in my life. I miss him everyday, think of him everyday and wish he was still my friend. I know he moved on and can carless how I feel since I was the one who left the relationship. Its not that your getting over the person when you break up, it getting over the fact your not in love anymore and want that feeling back more than anything. That is what I learned.n Don''t get me wrong I have had one of the most amazing years of my life and don''t regret my choice. Break ups are not easy. ',

Asia

April 11, 2011 @ (Texas)

Tags: Young

I'm pretty young. I'm not going to tell you my age, just my story.

So I was in school right-WAY TOO YOUNG TO BE DATING. I was a average girl. I'm not popular, more like anti-social. I wasn't really looking at guys yet but then about around December I found a note in my locker. This semi-popular guy was actually asking me out. I was about to say no when my friends told me that I should at least try to be a little social so I went out with him. He was nice at first, a little loud and controlling but nice. By the end of our first month dating I grew to like him. We hung out and then my grades dropped a little, not much but I went from a average of 96-100 to about an average of 89-95 not much but my parents certainly noticed. I continued to hang out with him. One day I think it was around mid-April when we were out at the mall when he told me to hold on to this box or something - he wanted me to shoplift. I never took it whatever it was and quickly left the shop. He followed me. We didn't talk. The next day he told me that I was too "stiff", "cheery" ---- (Who the hell says cheery?)----

We broke up sort of if you could even call it that.
-we kissed-we hung out-we broke up

And get this! Around June I found out he was using me. Turns out his friends dared him to ask me out sayin that i would never say yes. I shouldn't have. I cried and it hurt, it still does.

After a couple of months though I realize that I was never really in love I just really really really really really liked him.

Jerry

April 11, 2011 @ (Minnesota)

Tags: No-O

My ex told me our relationship has become "platonic" We had been together for about 4 months. I was an ideal boyfriend in nearly every way, I'm funny, I'm decent looking, I'm a great cook, and I cooked several fine meals for her. I took her out to fancy restaurants, movies, and plays. I bought her flowers several times to surprise her, and even delivered them to her at work so her coworkers could all be jealous of her. There was one problem, I was bad in bed.

I was a virgin when we started dating. She knew this, because we had been friends for a while, so she knew not to expect much from me in the bedroom, at least at first. In spite of that I knew how to give her pleasure in other ways, and never failed to get her off.

When we finally had sex, I didn't have the problem that most guys have the first time. Instead of not lasting long enough, I didn't have an orgasm at all. I was hard, I just didn't finish. We had sex on three different dates, each time the same thing. I was getting better at it each time, less awkward, more satisfying for her, but each time I didn't blow, probably because she was obsessed with making me come, and it made me nervous.

The last time we had sex, I got her off three times, I stayed hard for so long, we just kept going until the early hours of the morning, until she literally passed out from exhaustion. But, because I didn't have an orgasm, she began to doubt herself and think that I didn't find her attractive.

I told her every day how beautiful she was, but still she somehow reached the conclusion that the fact that I hadn't gone from virgin to Peter North in 3 lays somehow meant she was to blame.

We were going to try one more time, but the day before that date I found out my mom was dying. We tried anyway, but I was to distressed and couldn't even get it up.

So now, my mom is on her deathbed, my bills are piling up because I have missed work, I am behind in my classes because I have been missing school, and my ex dumped me, not because I can't please her in bed, but because she doesn't think I get enough pleasure in bed.

I think she should have given me more time. I mean, 3 times isn't really much of a chance to prove yourself, especially if you start as a virgin.

Funny thing is, I'm not mad at her, I feel sorry for her, I was probably the best boyfriend she will ever have.

Danielle

March 31, 2011 @ (Chicago)

Tags: breakup, first, relationship, heartbroken

My boyfriend and I were together for just over two years. It was the first serious relationship either of us had been in, and we were in love. He fought hard to win me over, and he made me feel more special than I have ever felt in my life. He was my world. I trusted him completely and never in my wildest dreams imagined that he could break my heart.

During the last few months of our relationship, I felt a subtle shift. It was nothing to raise any alarms, but I definitely noticed it. I realized that I was usually the one to initiate affection, or to plan an outing, or even to call. He was still kind and loving, but it felt as though his passion had faded.

I confronted him about it. I asked him if he was still in love with me. The moment I said it, I regretted it. He suddenly looked very confused, and the second he began talking I knew I had opened Pandora's Box. With a pained look in his eyes, he told me he wasn't sure anymore -- that our relationship had become "comfortable." He said he needed time to think.

After a week without contact, he he came over to my apartment. I felt optimistic; I was convinced that we would just end up having a serious talk addressing the inevitable loss of the puppy love stage in our relationship. I was wrong. He told me that he was no longer in love with me, that he no longer wanted to be my boyfriend, but he couldn't imagine losing me as a friend. In that moment I felt my world collapse. I pleaded with him to reconsider, I begged him to stay. Nothing I said had any effect, and he left my place in tears.

It's been six months since I've seen him, and my heart is still in pieces. Our parting was so sudden, I still feel like I'm in shock. After a few months of trying to remain his friend, I quit. The pain of being platonic was too great for me, and my pain was too great for him. Now I'm too scared to reach out to him again for fear of the pain that comes with knowing you've been replaced. All I want is to be back in his arms, but he's let me go and hasn't looked back.

Crushed

March 23, 2011 @ (Georgia)

Tags: ruthless

I was with my guy for over 6 years and i was 7 months pregnant, well a month before i found out i was pregnant he changed, he was always angry and he acted like he despised my touch. well i sorta knew what it was but i was going through the hormones of pregnancy and i just ignored it. well i was bored so i drove to his job to surprise him when he got off so we could maybe go get something to eat, well for all tn he women out there who have experienced this you know what im about to describe, a woman came out and was standing next to a truck she worked there and i got that gut feeling that there was something wrong so i couldnt stop staring at her. then he comes out and the first thing he says is, why are you here, and then walks away to go talk to that b****. i stood there in disbelief so i began to cry and i stormed off, well he turns out was in the beginning stages of a relationship with her and they only went as far as kissing. but fast forward to when i was 7 months pregnant. he was still acting crazy even though we had moved way across the country so i guess he was upset i caught him i dont know but he was still being a jerk. so i ask him when will get married since we already started a family and we been together for so long, well that bastard tells me that he doesnt want to marry me anymore cause he doesnt think im the "one" anymore so he doesnt want to risk marrying me if its just a big mistake. his words exactly. well being pregnant, that far along as well, you can imagine the devastation i felt. well since he was gonna just abandon me and our unborn child i dug through his emails the next day and he told that trick that he was gonna leave and go back home. well being pregnant and knowing that the father is gonna just abandon you and your child will crush anybody's heart.

El

March 16, 2011 @ (NY)

Tags: Youthinkyouhaditbad?

Just a bit of history: My boyfriend and I met our first semester in law school, and dated for 16 months. The first major problem happened about 7 months into our relationship, when I found out I was pregnant and had to have an abortion. My appointment was on a Friday, the day my boyfriend planned to drive to Indianapolis for a Pokemon tournament with his buddies. Yes, a Pokemon tournament. He DID drive me to the appointment, after initially saying he wouldn't because of the tournament, but after it was over, tucked me in at my apartment and shot down to Indy for the remainder of the weekend. Then, in October, I found 2 Craigslist postings by him, one looking for a dude to have sex with, and the other looking for a male to female transexual to have sex with. I wish I were joking. Like a moron in love, I stayed with him. On the night February 12th, 2011, he told me that we were going to be together forever, and have healthy children--something he's said before. The next morning, the day before Valentine's Day, I called him to solidify some plans we had, and he dumped me. For the past month, he has strung me along, and I've been too blindly in love to let him go. Even after breaking up, we agreed to go to our law school's ball together. We had a fight, and I invited someone else, but he told me that he still wanted to go with me and was upset I had purchased another ticket. So we decided that we'd still go together, and he reiterated how happy he was that we were.
Finally, I find out he has been talking to another girl (not from him, of course),and a few days ago, he told me he can't take me to ball, even as a friend, because he can't commit to something 3 weeks away when he doesn't know what his "status" will be.

This guy, who is Mr. Popular in law school, has everyone fooled BUT me. Good riddance.

Aliana

March 16, 2011 @ (India)

Tags: Hm

I got together with my best friend. We had a good time, moved to a city of a different country together to live there for a year during my student exchange. We had a good time and we cared for each other a lot. Soon doubts crept in, I wondered whether I loved him enough, whether this was what I wanted from love in life. Only in the crisis that lead to our break up I learned that he's had similar doubts. The drama is that there was no drama. We broke up in perfect mutual understanding, in agreement over the issues that we didn't like and also sharing the opinion that starting new with somebody else would be the best option. I still believe this is right and I don't want to let things get messy by contacting him, I don't want him to come back out of sympathy and I don't want me to try and get him back just out of the fear of losing an extraordinary friend and perhaps the most supportive, accepting and understanding person I met in my life.
Now, it's only been two weeks and after an amazing conversation with one of my professors who tried to help me (and succeeded doing so in a way), I still doubt my choice and I still miss him and the loss of him is certainly the hardest thing I ever had to take.
Perhaps you guys think this is easier as it didn't get nasty, and perhaps you are right, but is there anything that is more bitter than two people who desperately want to be together and tried to make each other happy but whose love simply wasn't enough?
However, this story just seemed different from most I read here so I'll share it with you.