Searching for "life"


368 Results For 'life'

Colson Anderson

February 28, 2024 @ (Bexhill )

Tags: Losing my love of life


I meat my partner 7 years ago as her builder after two months we became partners it took me 10 months to rebuild the house for witch I loved doing I only saw her weekends. We had a lovely house.then she moved in after a week or so we were watching tv. And then she started to rock in the chair I did not say everything I just put my hand on her back and she stopped. Then as time went on she would do mor strange things she was constantly on her phone playing games it was sometimes hard to have a conversation when it come to the bedroom it became a no go when it come to love making I only had to touch her and she would complain so I said if this is going to happen then we should stop and we did for the rest of our time together. I did not mind as sex is over important to me .I still loved he very much.we then sold the property and moved in to a new house witch I also turned in to a nice house. As time went on she done more strange things so I took on my self to look it up on the website.all the things she would do and the way she would treat me and the way she talks to me was heading towards being on the spectrum I would try and talk about it and she did not want to no and it got worse .and the last year the jungle was on tv Friday night ant and deck as from tomorrow we will be voting off so I sad who do you think will go first and she I don’t know you are watching it not me ion a bad tone of voice I had seven years of this and I sad something I should not of said I was so up set with my self for saying what I sad. It upset her so much that she wanted me out of the house.that was in October it’s turned out she is allistic so I was right I tried to talk about it but she wouldn’t she never wants to see me again. When an allistic person gets something in their head that’s it. I loved her and still do so much what I said was wrong but I had this for seven years and I would go back tomorrow if I could .we all need to talk if we don’t how can we work it all out. I’m 69 and now I have lost the one I loved so much. And I don’t want to go on anymore being alone is not good for the soul.


       

Maya

June 16, 2022 @ (Netherlands)

Tags: Breakup


When I was 16 I was curious about having a relationship with a boy. Any if possible, although I had some in mind for a while.

He was the friend of my brother, but also a friend in a group at school I was part of. He was nice, treated me like I was normal. I had very low self esteem. No other boy treated me like him.
I chatted a lot with him on MSN. At one point he broke up with his girlfriend and I was kind of eager to match him with someone. I started to like him and wishing I was his girlfriend. He made me feel tingly.
At one point I convinced him to kiss me. And he was very good at it.
We were not a couple at that point. He kept me on a distance, not sure what to do. Mostly because of my brother. The summer was hot and we were getting more involved. We shared many kisses and it was amazing. But still he would not want to be my boyfriend.
I was getting down, but I waited for him.
It was September when he finaly dared to make it official. My brother was kind of let down, but wanted us to be happy so he went along with it.

My relationship was in a nutshell a life changing experience, but not good for me. We had lots of sex, what kept us addicted to eachother. But he was not my match. He wanted to go out a lot, see sports and friends, while I wanted to stay at home, watch movies and such. And there was his toxic mother. In the beginning she was enthusiastic, but later on she didn't saw me as a good daughter in law. She was convinced I was not good for her son. In the end, she was right, but the way she treated me was not right. I felt worse about myself than ever before. But I loved him, so I holded on. Even when we were on a break for a month, I still went back to him. The last year of our relationship was the most miserable one. He made me feel like I was not good enough for him, because I was not myself. He was also right. I wasn't. I left all my hobbies behind and did things I didn't like. Even though he ment I was not his ideal girlfriend, I know now I couldn't match his expectations.
In the end he went out with a girl to a cinema. And that was his trigger to end it.
I was heartbroken and begged him to come back.
But he said he would not.
We met one last time and after that I never spoke to him again.

Now I can say I am grateful he ended it, but healing from this relationship took a long time for me. At first I thought about him daily, at almost every moment, and slowly that became less and less.

I met my husband 3 years later. Right after my lowest point ever. He is my match. Not sure soulmate, but I can't think of anyone more right for me. He is kind, caring, make me laugh and is my best friend. I can share anything with him. But most important: stay myself. I spent time on my hobbies and interests and he not only admires it, but stimulates me. I love him so much and I am grateful to have this other life.

From time to time I sometimes think about my ex. Wondering what my life would have looked like if we didn't broke up. Or what kind of children we would have had. I have a son now, so that is on my mind a lot. Doesn't mean I want to be his, but I just wonder. It doesn't hurt me anymore and I never want to go back.


       

Elizabeth

May 24, 2022 @ (Phoenix, Arizona)

Tags: Bad breakup


We got together in 2020, it was the beginning of the second quarter of my 8th grade year, I was pretty much infatuated with him to say the least. He had a girlfriend when we first met, (he was a new student at my school.) but I wasn't going to let that get in my way. (I was a shitty person back then, I know.) They eventually broke up and he and I started to talk on the down-low because all of his new friends, (who all used to be friends with me.) didn't like me, for reasons I still don't know. We got together mid November, and I was so so happy, little did I know getting with him would be a horrible mistake. It had almost been a month of being together when suddenly during school he had just broken up with me, no explanation, no nothing. I had later found out that one of his friends got an old video of me kissing another boy and said I cheated on him with that boy days after out relationship started, (I obviously didn't cheat.) I explained to him that they were lying and we got back together, that was only the beginning. Throughout the rest of our 8th grade year we were basically on and off, we got into several fights because he and his friends did really mean messed up things to me. I almost got into a fight with one of his friends because they were flirting and I texted her while I wasn't at school, he made fun of me to them while we were together, he let them call me names right in front of him,he humiliated me in front of everyone several times, and that wasn't even the half of it. We finally had a steady going relationship during the summer, (because we weren't around any of his friends.) but when we started our freshman year everything would change. The first couple months weren't bad, he started to realize how his friends made me feel, and he made more time for me, but never learned how to stick up for me. We had reached a whole year, everyone thought we were the power couple, believe me, I thought so too. We broke up in December, The night of our winter formal, I was devastated, but I couldn't handle what he was putting me through anymore. He became suicidal, which ended up making me depressed and suicidal. Everyone turned against me for breaking up with him, they got my story all twisted, and before I knew it, I was alone, heartbroken, confused and I wanted to kill myself. I was harassed daily, he ended up making fun of me again, created all these stories and I was completely miserable. It had been 4 months of not being together and we tried to start working things out and were going to try and become a couple again, he had other girls in his life, he lied but I knew he did, and for a little time I did too. Me and my ex would fight daily, and when I told him I didn't want to try with him anymore he went and told my parents all these secrets about me and I had gotten taken out of school for it, it may seem like a relief but things were starting to get better, it was the end of the year and I was slowly recovering from what had happened. While at home he would email me because I didn't have a phone, I didn't want anything to do with him but he kept messaging me, on Saturday, ( 3 days ago) he started becoming mean and aggressive, I had a break down and I was back at square one. I'm not over him, I don't think I ever will get over him, I'm not 15 I was 13 when I met him, I know I'm young but he really was my first love, and my true first heartbreak. I just want to be okay again, I still feel pretty miserable, but this story definitely needed to be shared.


       

Elizabeth

May 24, 2022 @ (Phoenix, Arizona)

Tags: Bad breakup


We got together in 2020, it was the beginning of the second quarter of my 8th grade year, I was pretty much infatuated with him to say the least. He had a girlfriend when we first met, (he was a new student at my school.) but I wasn't going to let that get in my way. (I was a shitty person back then, I know.) They eventually broke up and he and I started to talk on the down-low because all of his new friends, (who all used to be friends with me.) didn't like me, for reasons I still don't know. We got together mid November, and I was so so happy, little did I know getting with him would be a horrible mistake. It had almost been a month of being together when suddenly during school he had just broken up with me, no explanation, no nothing. I had later found out that one of his friends got an old video of me kissing another boy and said I cheated on him with that boy days after out relationship started, (I obviously didn't cheat.) I explained to him that they were lying and we got back together, that was only the beginning. Throughout the rest of our 8th grade year we were basically on and off, we got into several fights because he and his friends did really mean messed up things to me. I almost got into a fight with one of his friends because they were flirting and I texted her while I wasn't at school, he made fun of me to them while we were together, he let them call me names right in front of him,he humiliated me in front of everyone several times, and that wasn't even the half of it. We finally had a steady going relationship during the summer, (because we weren't around any of his friends.) but when we started our freshman year everything would change. The first couple months weren't bad, he started to realize how his friends made me feel, and he made more time for me, but never learned how to stick up for me. We had reached a whole year, everyone thought we were the power couple, believe me, I thought so too. We broke up in December, The night of our winter formal, I was devastated, but I couldn't handle what he was putting me through anymore. He became suicidal, which ended up making me depressed and suicidal. Everyone turned against me for breaking up with him, they got my story all twisted, and before I knew it, I was alone, heartbroken, confused and I wanted to kill myself. I was harassed daily, he ended up making fun of me again, created all these stories and I was completely miserable. It had been 4 months of not being together and we tried to start working things out and were going to try and become a couple again, he had other girls in his life, he lied but I knew he did, and for a little time I did too. Me and my ex would fight daily, and when I told him I didn't want to try with him anymore he went and told my parents all these secrets about me and I had gotten taken out of school for it, it may seem like a relief but things were starting to get better, it was the end of the year and I was slowly recovering from what had happened. While at home he would email me because I didn't have a phone, I didn't want anything to do with him but he kept messaging me, on Saturday, ( 3 days ago) he started becoming mean and aggressive, I had a break down and I was back at square one. I'm not over him, I don't think I ever will get over him, I'm not 15 I was 13 when I met him, I know I'm young but he really was my first love, and my true first heartbreak. I just want to be okay again, I still feel pretty miserable, but this story definitely needed to be shared.


       

Unknown

December 01, 2021 @ (Massachusetts)

Tags: Twisted


So this all started from meeting this great guy in a game. I know meeting people usually isn't a great idea especially dating them but that didn't really bother me anymore. I met him in the game and we started talking that day. He told me about himself and I decided to as well. Then a red flag came up. He said he liked this girl...yet asked me out the day we met just to "try it out" and see how far that goes. So of course I accept his proposal. This had to have been the biggest mistake of my life. We started calling later on every week and it would be so awkward, the silence and everything. School was around the corner which was online since the whole pandemic happened. I met this girl and we would start communicating in the meets. I asked if she had discord...and she said yes! So i decided to add her. That day when I added her on discord and on game, we started talking more often. She decided to invite to this group chat in discord which had her best friend, crush, and me. I asked them all if its okay that I add my boyfriend. His name was Lume. I added him and that point on everyone liked him and would talk to him 24/7. He started slowly ignoring me and playing with them more often. Mind you I was very busy at that time and had no time to play. I got really upset and jealous because he would be bffs with the girl that he cheated on me with. We aren't at that point yet so, this day I decided to see what he was playing because he was playing with ash (the girl I met in the meetings). Then I noticed he was playing with everyone. Ashs crush, best friend, and Lume. Mind you I hated her crush. Her crush is the girl the Lume cheated on me with. Her name was Izzy. Izzy and I fought in the group at first due to her flirting with Lume. Yet Lume took her side. Another red flag huh? So I got so pissed I ignored him. We started fighting ect.....then depression hit. Lets get to the point, Ash and Izzy dated then broke up which I found strange. Lume later on in the weeks broke up with me....saying I was manipulated. This was a day that I was in call with him and Izzy!!! She knew the whole plan. He decided to block me so I did it back. I still talked to ash since she talked to Lume and Izzy. I was perfectly fine after the break up, I got over it little by little..then something happened. They started dating. Izzy decided to show pics of Lume kissing her in game or whatever and confessing love to her. I broke down. Of course she liked him too and mind you this was when Lume was dating me and Izzy was dating Ash. They are both fucking cheaters. I tried to ask them and yes we did argue over text and I was going all out, but I didn't give a shit. Lume broke up with her due to cheating on her. Then I started talking with Izzy again for a while and we got along yet it ended. Ash dated her best friend who was transgender to a girl and was straight on lesbian. They broke up too. She apparently didn't give a shit about us since she only wanted attention. She talks to Lume now and I'm pretty sure everyone else is too. I hope Karma gets him. He started dating more girls and they would break up. Hes a cheating bastard and you ladies should never date online especially when you notice red flags. Think twice, now I'm in a happy relationship with someone irl and I'm done with people online.


       

Carly

October 29, 2021 @ (Southeast Asia)

Tags: Breakup


I was never in a relationship before. It was never in my mind to have a relationship yet. But he came into my life. At first, I ignored him cause I was not comfortable to start a relationship yet but he was persistent and he was patient with me. Until one day, I fell for him completely. We started dating. However, it was just a secret to my parents as they are very strict and wants me to focus on my career first. I thought everything was going well with our relationship then the pandemic came. We were not able to see each other for almost a year, and our relationship started to fall apart. I admit it was my fault. I only seldom message him that time. We got into arguments. Then something happened change our life completely. He got someone pregnant. When we had a fight, he went out with his friends for a drink. He was very upset that time. And he wanted to meet me so badly but i could not. He drank so much that he was so wasted and then he did the thing that ruined our relationship. He slept with someone. After a month, he confessed to me since the girl he slept with claimed she is pregnant. He broke up with me through text. I was so heartbroken when he told me. I was not expecting him to sleep with someone else. I cried so much. I cried everyday still not believing it. Even until now, I still cry. It hurts so much.


       

BlahBeeBlah

April 27, 2021 @ (Midwest)

Tags: Bad Breakup


So I entered my first relationship for the first time in 2019 and everything was slowly turning amazing. I had begun opening up to him, something that he requested of me, and just being more happy in general. Sad to say I was a depressed little thing who was also agrophobic. Once we got closer to our one year anniversary we started discussing moving in together and even potentially having a family. My first red flag should have came from this as he often flip flopped on what it is he wanted and agreed to. So we move in together and about two months in I started developing BV and I would take medicine for it and get a yeast infection. I know now that not even a week after I first develop BV which I was told is common, he had began cheating on me with multiple women. This had been going on for months before I found out and it did it without any hesitation once so ever. I felt so betrayed as this was the man I thought had loved and respected me and would tell me magnificent things like he wished he had met me sooner in life. I tried to work things out with him but he said that the relationship was blah and that it had ran its course. I asked him what did they have that I didn't, besides the whole BV issue, and he just replied something different. This happened months ago and it still hurts like it happened yesterday because for some stupid reason I still love him. I do not understand what is wrong with me and my heart, but I wish so desperately that I didn't meet him. We still interact with each other and I know he still messes with some of the women that he cheated on me with, but he's just toying with them too telling them sweet nothings like he did me and fucking everything that moves. I am so desperate that I engage with sex with him and I know its stupid as fuck of me but I can't help it. I really don't want to feel what I feel anymore, but I can't cut off my feelings and if I leave I'll be homeless


       

Zoya

January 18, 2021 @ (Jaipur)

Tags: Toobroken


Broken hearted writing this i hate you i hate you so much,.
Made mefeel like no hope, nothing at all
The sweet words turned to ff words. Its not changing a guy its like you were same fro bigginning but i never realized with my eyes
When i ask myself i only got tears ntg elseand i just want to shut the door and simply cry over thats it. It all started in front of god but yet he keep his silence.When i met you first i had never realized how much i could love a guy but tdy wrting this why for god sake i met you.
You made me feel like i lived two years with you unloved just for your time pass. Bcz of u i lost my career and lost hope.Actually i lost my hope in god too. You have every thing and every one around you but why did you made me alone, I pushed my friends away and the thoughts thts in my head never rests bcz of you i made 3 times sucidal attempts but god saved me for more suffering and making me see you with someone else.
All you did was nothing just to hurt, once you controlled me said you loved me and protected me, then left me for higher study - said your father wont agree with you, then you put your frnds around me to keep an eye on me, then you fall with someone else, you started fighting for blaming me and then all of a sudden i was the one who made all the things bad in your life so the break up initiated.
Whts wrong with me why did you do this to me were the exact words i asked him.
He replied in cold tht he left me and it was over no point in arguing over the past and further told me he never truely loved me.I know my mistake,may be being loyal and expecting the same from you, little bit of understanding and bit of true love i guess, the time .
There is no hope. May god bless you even if you have thousands of gffs.
If anyone reading this plz be honest with your gf even the bitter truth can't hit her hear but your hidden lie does.


       

Davina G

December 05, 2020 @ (India)

Tags: Bad breakup


I was in a very dark place mentally ,I had no life plans .we just recently parted from a 1 years live in relationship and shipped to long distance relationship. He was always avoiding my calls at 1st ,then only talked when he had the time to call that too for only 5 to 15 mins then he'll insisting hang up claiming he needs his sleep . I tried my best to maintain our relationship but I got a hint of him cheating me. Obviously ,I denied it 1st then I believe it but I still wanted to stay with Me. I love to hear him say he loves me but deep down I also knew that he only calls and contacts me when I m need by him .once I denied to help him only to tease him a little bit but he got mad ,and call me many names like slut and what not ,I could his friends laughing in the back. Then few nights later he called and apologized, I accepted his apology . After two days I was feeling very down ,I was even having suicidal thoughts with inferior thought . I kenew he won't pick up my calls but still I tried calling him, because I really need a talk that night . I called him 5 times he didn't picked up then I msg him saying I knew what he did .he instantly call back and then I said y did you ignored my calls he obviously denied it,I didn't got to say a word with him a friend of his snatched his phone and started talking to me which hurter me a lot then I said to the friends in an irritated voice that I had nothing to do with you plz give phone to my bf .then his other friends started to scold me ,I was in the very of crying when he picked up the phone and said why are u always disturbing my fun . Then again his other friend snatched his phone lecturing me how I should respectfully talk to them while my boyfriend was laughing in the back which shattered my feelings .Then I got mad and asked him to never call me . Then again I was so mad and wanted to say a thing or two to his friends and him .I call 38 times weeping but none of them were answered ,I haven't talked to him since. I m sad all the time think about him ,dream about him.worst part is in my dream both of us are happy together as soon as I wake up reality hits me .


       

Davina G

December 05, 2020 @ (India)

Tags: Bad breakup


I was in a very dark place mentally ,I had no life plans .we just recently parted from a 1 years live in relationship and shipped to long distance relationship. He was always avoiding my calls at 1st ,then only talked when he had the time to call that too for only 5 to 15 mins then he'll insisting hang up claiming he needs his sleep . I tried my best to maintain our relationship but I got a hint of him cheating me. Obviously ,I denied it 1st then I believe it but I still wanted to stay with Me. I love to hear him say he loves me but deep down I also knew that he only calls and contacts me when I m need by him .once I denied to help him only to tease him a little bit but he got mad ,and call me many names like slut and what not ,I could his friends laughing in the back. Then few nights later he called and apologized, I accepted his apology . After two days I was feeling very down ,I was even having suicidal thoughts with inferior thought . I kenew he won't pick up my calls but still I tried calling him, because I really need a talk that night . I called him 5 times he didn't picked up then I msg him saying I knew what he did .he instantly call back and then I said y did you ignored my calls he obviously denied it,I didn't got to say a word with him a friend of his snatched his phone and started talking to me which hurter me a lot then I said to the friends in an irritated voice that I had nothing to do with you plz give phone to my bf .then his other friends started to scold me ,I was in the very of crying when he picked up the phone and said why are u always disturbing my fun . Then again his other friend snatched his phone lecturing me how I should respectfully talk to them while my boyfriend was laughing in the back which shattered my feelings .Then I got mad and asked him to never call me . Then again I was so mad and wanted to say a thing or two to his friends and him .I call 38 times weeping but none of them were answered ,I haven't talked to him since. I m sad all the time think about him ,dream about him.worst part is in my dream both of us are happy together as soon as I wake up reality hits me .


       








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