You Broke Up How?

Steven G

July 11, 2014 @ (Yonkers, NY)

Tags: love, loss, bad break up, cheating, relationship

I have yet to go wrong on a “gut feeling” when it comes to a disaster with a significant other. I somehow can sense the bomb going off but never in time to defuse it. The most recent example was by a lovely lady I was seeing for several months. She and I did not land on solid ground due to the conditions of our start. We shared many laughs, cries, and plenty about each other during that time. I was hesitant at first about her feelings at first, not knowing if they were true or just brought up by the circumstances of her previous relationship. We shared a wild, strong sexual appetite during the first half of our relationship. Facing personal dilemmas and financial difficulties; she pursued a second job in which she could balance herself with. She quickly got an offer to work a gentlemen’s club as a coat checker. I saw the potential for disaster, keeping in mind her personality, state of mind, and lack of experience with the world. I feared that I might lose her in the process to some money throwing pig. Yet I needed to keep my personal fears in check and support who I regarded as my babe with anything she set her mind to. If this one thing could break us, than all my suspicions would be true; if they don’t than we could move forward, take the leap into going public with our relationship.

Several weeks later we began to drift apart, we would ignore mutual calls and text. We did not see each other for days at a time. I began to worry about us, and so I began to call her more often, asking how she was and brought up ideas on trips we could take. It had little to no affect, as her eyes and perhaps even her heart were set on someone else whom she met at the gentlemen’s club. One evening we got into an argument; and just like that, she asked me never to speak to her again; without any hesitation on my part, I hung up. The next day I told her we needed to talk; it was important that we clear the air. No response ever came that day, or the next day, or the day after. I tried once more and she quickly delivers the blow “I need time” which we all know to be “break-up mode”. I tried and tried again to see her so we could talk, all while sensing the inevitable blow that was soon to come. I would go to her apartment late at night, and she and her truck wouldn’t be there. I knew that I had lost her at this point; or maybe just 99%. I took a chance and went to her one last time; even after she told me not to. I gave her everything that she ever wanted, with a promise to be there always. She wasn’t giving in, she could not see being with me being better than the guy that she met recently. I knew that my words were barely chipping away at her wall. She was cold all throughout this and yet at the end she hugged me and showed me signs of remorse or sympathy. Before she walked back in I asked her, if in this last moment, we could turn things around and try to work this out with a clean slate. Her lips said no, but in her eyes, I saw a glimmer of yes. Despite what I felt, she gave me the closure I had asked her for. I wished her the best, and reminded her that I would always have her in my heart. Got in my car, and I had the most difficult drive of my life.

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Nan El

January 01, 2013 @ (New York)

Tags: Cheating with co-worker, 3 years of lies

Over three years ago I started dating a man that was selfish, a cheater, a liar and just plain self centered. He admitted this to me. I was hesitant at first but it didn't take long for him to have me believing that he wanted to be a better man for me. We worked together for years and once he transferred to another department, that's when we started dating. He asked me to marry him after just a few months and treated me as if I was the only woman on earth. We spent constant time together and he would look me in the eyes everyday and tell me how much he loves and adores me and wants to be with only me the rest of his life. I introduced him to my kids and he moved in with us shortly thereafter. He lived with us for one year and during that time he started drifting, working more...going out longer with his friends. He started telling me he was having a hard time living with kids (who I only have half the week) and he only saw them maybe twice a week. He told me he couldn't live with us anymore and it just wasn't "him". The day after he moved out he was begging for me back and this went on and off for a year and a half. We broke up last December of 2011 because he couldn't handle things...all while still claiming to love me and not want anyone else. For about 6 weeks we went back and forth about our love for each other then he said he needs me and promises to be the man II need. I took him back and we were together up until October of this past year 2012....still back and forth with his feelings...but kept promising to marry me and move back in. I broke up with him in October when he told me he couldn't take vacation to Disney World with me and the kids which was planned and paid for and was happening in 3 weeks!! He continued to text and call me crying that he needs me, etc... But his gram was sick and he didn't want to go anywhere. He made me feel guilty for taking vacation without him! When I returned right after Thanksgiving, I started finding out some things from people and emails, etc.. He started sleeping with one of my employees last year when we broke up...she works very closely with me. They broke up when he got back together with me...but then he contacted her to "get together" in April, May and November. We went to a concert together in June and they acted like they didn't even know each other then went to get beer for 20 minutes together! At that point I had no reason to think anything of it. Once I confronted both of them, they denied even knowing each other and called me crazy. She ultimately confessed but they are both still claiming it wasn't all year long. She has had boyfriends this whole time as well. I am now in a situation where they both still work for the company and she still reports to me. They act as if nothing is wrong and life is good....they show no remorse. By the way, she is 12 years younger than him! I have so much pain and it is in my face everyday. How do I get over it?

Rogue

May 08, 2020 @ (Stevens Point)

Tags: bad breakup

So. I was recently dumped by my GF of almost 4yrs. She left due to some issues we were facing this last year. TL:DR she walked in on me after I kissed a friend who was comforting me and saw me nervously laughing about the situation because I couldn't believe what I had just done. We had a talk about everything and she came back in the early hours of the morning. I've tried to do everything to prove that I was sorry it happened and that she was the sole focus of what I wanted. I started planning trips for us. Continued to make sure she was happy by taking care of her needs, pushing her to do certain things independently, and promoting her to make more content for her hobbies.We got into a few conversations about how she was feeling, but would always circle back to the friend I kissed. Which made me dismissive of the conversation. I did eventually realize most of my external stressors, so I quit my old job because I saw the stress affecting how I treated her. I stopped giving words of affirmation as I figured nothing I say would show her, so I let my actions do the talking. But she stopped talking about her feelings to me and relied on some of her friends who definitely had a bias based on what she was telling them. Meanwhile she never saw that I was fixing our financial situation to be able to move into our own place. Or that I was gauging my ability to be able to support a family. She broke up with me and claimed that she felt unloved and unappreciated. Brought up the "cheating" situation again claimed she would not be a fool to allow her to marry/date someone that cheated on her. Now I sit here in my home I feel like a stranger in. Because the person I had opened up to and thought of settling down with, decided to listen to her friends advise and leave me at the drop of a hat. And then demanded to be friends. Instead of trying to figure out where we both went wrong and try to overcome it without the inclusion of her biased friends.

Eleonor

March 16, 2012 @ (Sussex)

Tags: Michael, Tom, Jared

Ever known a person who you constantly fight with? Like every single day?

Well that's the case with me and Tom. We argue so much, scream at each other.. But I love him to bits.. here's my story.

We met 3 years ago in college and I remember saying eeww he's so unattractive. We spoke a bit but that's the end of it. Three months later I met him at a function where I was bored out of my mind and he came up to me and said hey aren't you the person I spoke to around 3 months ago and I was like yes now I remember you. Anyway so we got talking and my dad phoned me and told me he couldn't take me back home that night so Tom drove me home. We are both into acting and around 2 months later were taking place in the same show and that's where we exchanged numbers. I was in a relationship at the time but as time passed I started to develop a soft spot for Tom and forgot my initial outlook on him.

Things got pretty ugly with my then boyfriend and it was Tom who I would phone at all times crying because my boyfriend was treating me like dirt. He supported me and helped me through the breakup, and 3 days after my breakup he held my hand so I was so confused.

Come April and as much as I liked Tom I had strong feelings for another guy- Jared. We started dating and Tom was devastated and didn't speak to me for like 2 whole months then when I broke up with Jared he was the one who I turned to and he held me and supported me. Then the shock of my life came when as I was crying he kissed me.. I was so confused I didn't know whether he liked me or not..

We had a Summer romance, we would do everything together and I loved him so much and was always loyal to him and was head over heels in love with him but my friends would tell me why him he is so unattractive and I would say I think he is handsome because I know his character well and I have learned to see over and above physical beauty.

He was so romantic, we would take long walks by the beach, make out in his car, go to quite places and spend the night making out there.

Then college started again and everything changed. We see each other often there. One night we both drank a lot and got really drunk and started making out in front of everyone and I don't know why he was embarrassed by it and when we met the next day he wasn't the same as usual..

He would ignore me, shout and fight with me and act like a total loser. Then this really fit guy started speaking to me and I told Tom do you like me he said no why I said fine then I'm going to start dating Michael and he didnt speak to me anymore.

I got into a relationship with Michael and since then things between Tom and I have been disastrous. We meet in college and then there's lots of flirting but then we fight so much all the time and compete coz we have classes together and he asked me how much I got in my Anatomy exam and I said A+ and he yelled at me coz he got an A.

Last week we met up with some of his friends and he held my hand and things really seemed weird. Coz I like Michael and he's really sweet and I know that Tom is just playing with my feelings now and he is jealous and possessive and doesn't like the fact that I am dating another guy yet he is too much of a jackass to commit to me :/

DIANA LUIS

June 11, 2024 @ (United States)

Tags: ex back

Hello my name is Diana from the USA, I was so deeply in love with a man that even after he began cheating on me I still wanted him back. but things didn’t work out between us as he chose to move on with the same person he was cheating on me with, and I got really hurt

Justin

March 14, 2010 @ (London)

Tags: london

I got a text message breakup for you all... the text read as follows. Hey J... You're on team Jacob, and I'm going with team Edward. I really really hate that stupid movie!

Anonymous

June 27, 2018 @ (Kansas)

Tags: Cheating

She was amazing. I told myself that I wouldn’t date anyone for a long time and then she came into the picture. 6 months into our relationship I was put on probation and sent to a mental hospital and she cheated on me with out best friend. Then 3 months later cheated on me again. Somehow I thought that I could forgive her and we kept going for another year, only to find out that she lied to me for the last year and she was completely over me.

DaMan

January 25, 2010 @ (Ohio)

Tags: ohio

I'm kinda of pissed. She found a thong that wasn't hers under my bed. My attempt to spin and deflect by saying why don't you remember last years valentines day gift, didn't work so well. Needless to say the breakup didn't take too much longer after that. I'm mad because i really did like her. Tequila can make you do stupid things. damn oh well

Time

July 23, 2011 @ (FL.)

Tags: time

My husband said the words I needed to hear, "you'll never be alone again"... and I believed him. His actions behind closed doors were mentally abusive, he even was able to convince our novice church counselor's that it was me. His assault was ruthless and without mercy all the while appearing to all others as the nicest guy ever. I went to a professional counselor and right away she recognized his behavior as narcissistic. True to the disorder your complete emotional,mental and circumstantial destruction is their goal. I lost my friends, had to move from the place I loved, lost my home, my career, my dreams, any respect I had from my peers in college. I still want to move back to that area (I love the mountains) but have nothing left there. He still works in the ministry (I introduced him to)there as far as I know and attends the church we went to together. I am hoping to trust again in another relationship.

John

November 14, 2013 @ (New York)

Tags: Bad breakup, emotional, love

My girlfriend I dated for just over a year broke up with me last week. She was my best friend in the entire world. Ever since birth we were best friends, she called me late at night last year and told me some guy was gonna ask her to prom and she couldn't say no but didn't want to go with him. I asked her over the phone. That night we went back to her house and watched movies after the dance. She told me how she was so thankful I asked her and how much fun she had.. And I kissed her.. It was quiet for a while and she hugged me and we cuddled the rest of the night not saying anything. A couple days later I brought her flowers and asked her out. She said yes. We were so happy for the next year, we promised never to stop talking, we hung out all the time, if she needed anything I was there. Then she got some new friends.. We started fighting for the first time in our relationship but we got over it and I loved her even more, but the day after our senior prom she told me she just didn't like me any more. I dont understand but I told her that I loved her one last time and gave her what she wanted. A few days later I realized I couldn't live without her I had gotten drunk for the first time in my life to try to ignore my feelings but nothing worked. I texted her amd told her I missed her... She said she missed me too.. We talked for a few days and I asked to see her again. She didn't respond to my texts or calls for a week. I texted her again a few days ago. I told her I missed her and that we should at least be friends. She said she misses me too. I asked to see her and she hasn't responded. I found out today she has a new boyfriend and she cheated on me for a month with him. But that's not the worst part. The worst part is I still loved her, I always will, and there's nothimg I can do about it