Searching for "rough"

272 Results For 'rough'

Kate

November 12, 2013 @ (Uew York)

Lost Love
I broke up with my boyfriend two months ago. We were together for 1 year. I only have myself to blame. I knew our relationship wouldnâ€™t work when we first started dating. We lived so far away from each other and we were so immature. It was too serious and we were too young. If I only knew then what I know now.

We would try to see each other every other week. For one year we did this. The bus trip took about six hours. At the time it didnâ€™t matter because I got to see him at the end of the trip. When I finally saw him after those six long hours, I wouldnâ€™t feel a thing. Our relationship was an illusion. We looked so cute in front of people but when we were alone we would always fight. The first six months was fine, but the other half was hell. We fought each night, even when we were not together. He would yell at me over the phone and I would yell back. When I said I didnâ€™t want to do this anymore, he would push me on the bed and just lay on top of me hugging me and I would forget everything. I know he didnâ€™t want me to go but we couldnâ€™t keep on living like this. Things were badâ€¦really bad and something had to change.

One night we finally ended it all.

Oh God, the agony. The pain is unbelievable. Itâ€™s rushing through my body, my veins, my soul. The memories take me back to that place. The night where it all went wrong. I said we couldnâ€™t do this anymore. You said you didnâ€™t want to break up. We had to end it; we couldnâ€™t keep on going like this. We shouted, we cried, we loved, one last time. It all played out so well. My hands in your hair, your name on my lips and your hands on my hips. The warmth of each other kept the room warm. It was love in the atmosphere. We looked at each other; and just like that, it all went away. The love we sheared, fading. The feelings we had, forgotten. The warmth in the room, gone.

The morning after.
I walked you to the stairs. You stood there confusing. I stood right beside you holding your hand. The stairs were hard to walk. I felt like a rock every time I took a step. We stopped at the front door. You looked in to my eyes as you had your hand on the door handle. Your eyes were blank and full of tears just waiting to run down your face. We kissed one last time. I cried as you took your bag and walked out the door. I watched you walk away; you stopped and looked back. I remember those other times youâ€™ve left, you would run back straight away, but this time you didnâ€™t. You just kept on walking. And just like that you were gone.

As I watched you drive away, I felt a raindrop on my skin. It ran down my face; just like the tears in my eyes. The begging of a journey for some people, but an ending of a journey for us.

Now itâ€™s finally over. I regret nothing.

Natalie

November 08, 2013 @ (Seattle)

Tags: bad break up, young love, sweet, cute, douche bag, depression, anxiety, high school, sad, ugh

Oh my gosh . My ex boyfriend is a douche bag. I swear .. I was never over him.. but he caused so much pain, and I really tried to .. BUT NOW HE WANTS TO GET BACK TOGETHER . I'VE HEARD RUMORS FROM MY FRIEND ALEX (who is also his best friend) BUT I DIDN'T BELIEVE IT. But now he's smiling at me with those beautiful teeth .. talking to me and luring me in with that voice.. the voice that's like honey and just makes me melt everytime I hear it. He changed me. I wasn't always depressed, even if my life wasn't all that great .. after my parents finalized the divorce, there wasn't much to look forward to. But he was there for me. He was always my shoulder to cry on. Ever since 7th grade . UGH, MIDDLE SCHOOL. I thought middle school was hard; but compared to high school, it was a party.. my emotions are just everywhere.. but yea, the point is, he ended up breaking me in the end. I knew it wasn't gonna last. Of COURSE I knew. But something at the back of my mind just wished it wasn't. And I guess I just couldn't accept the cruel reality that it was over. All those movie dates . All the times he'd put his arms around me.. and that smile- it was directed towards me and me only and I used to literally feel as if we were the only two people in the world. That strawberry blonde/brownish hair .. haha.. the long paragraphs he would send me in the morning about how beautiful he thought I was.. those times in third period where we laughed, he would flip his hair, start strumming that bass guitar of his while the strings teacher would yell at me about dropping my violin and then having to tune it all over again. We lived to make her annoyed omg , but I just miss it . I miss everything. I miss him. I miss not being lonely.

That time on the ferris wheel at the state fair with terry and alex? When we kissed and said 'I love you' for the 80th time?
I miss us.

The truth is, I was never over it. I miss running my fingers through his hair.

I just dont wanna be lonely.

I poured my heart out to him and he took advantage of me.

I miss that fairytale feeling.

But I guess all fairytales have to end. Just ask Troy. He had no problem ending mine.

And now he just wants to walk back into my life again? After all the pain that he's caused? Like nothing's happened? I just can't.

The thing that makes me hate myself the most? Everytime he glances at me, I still get butterflies. When I see him laugh in the hallways, my heard starts pounding inexpilcably fast. And the last and most horrifying thing? I was tempted. I was actually tempted to say yes.

Morgan

November 04, 2013 @ (United States)

Tags: The worst feeling in the world is being replaced

We were together for four years. I loved him with every ounce of me. I gave him my all. He was my everything. His parents were a big issue, they never allowed us to go out on dates and we constantly had to hangout with his family. He never asked me on dates, and never really wanted to spend time with me. I loved him more than he loved me I guess. My graduation party came and went and he never showed. His father would not allow him to come to it. It hurt very bad but I wanted to stay with him through it all. A few days went by and he said we needed to talk. He came over and broke up with me that night, he said he needed to focus on himself and I was not outgoing enough for him. It hurt days passed by and I found out he cheated on me with a girl four years younger than he is. Shortly after I went onto facebook and had to see pictures of them begin to appear, comments and love statuses going up about each other. His parents are constantly talking about how much they love her and how she is perfect for him. I thought he was the one, and he told me we were going to get married that i was the one for him. Four years, we were together four years and he moved on. He moved on and I cannot get him out of my head. I hope everyday he will come back to me and it tears me up inside what he is doing. He can take her out on dates, hangout with her all the time, and do everything for her. What does she have that I don't? I thought he loved me...

Lauren

November 03, 2013 @ (Denver )

Tags: bad break up

A Few of the Things:

Your beautiful eyes
That were the color of waves;
A few of the things
I will always crave.

Your lightning touch
that thundered through my nerves;
A few of the things
I felt I didn't deserve.

Your adorable laugh
And marvelous grin;
A few of the things
I fell in love with again.

Your short gentle hugs
And your plain little kiss;
A few of the things
I will constantly miss..
~lc

John

September 26, 2013 @ (Hidden)

Tags: Bad Break Up, Heartbreaking

So I've been dating this girl since senior year of high school, and we both had strong feelings for each other. She decides she wants to keep our relationship together long distance as she's staying home in California and I moved all the way out to Chicago for school. I want the same thing, because we both believed we were the one for each other. She told me she loved me every night before I went to sleep and promised to be the best, most loyal girlfriend possible. We stay together, I never even looked at a chick at a bar or anywhere I was on the weekends that showed any interest because I really didn't. I was the definition of loyal. I came home for christmas break, all went well, and then back to Chicago for me before I knew it. We stayed together long distance until I came home in the summer of 2013. She dumped me a week after my birthday in June (which was about a month into me being home for summer) because she felt I was a liar, dishonest, and not loyal. This came out of literally fucking nowhere. Distraught, heartbroken, and every word for "I'm not making it through this" found in the dictionary, I went through 2 weeks of alcohol abuse and couldn't even enjoy the family vacation I went on either. After I got home from my vacation, the next day actually, we got back together because she told me she knew in her heart that I was what she wanted and she really made me believe it. We got back together, stayed together for the next month and a half until I went back to school in Chicago, and after 3 weeks of being here she told me she has no idea what she wants and thinks that I'm absolutely the last thing she needs. She said after I left for school, even looking at my name when I'd text her back made her more and more not want to respond to it at all. And here I am now, in Chicago, stalking her instagram (deleted everything that had to do with me), twitter (posting tweets about another guy), and even tumblr which no man should ever go on as it is. So there ya go, I'm in one shitty situation. Plus her final text to me was "lets see how things go when you're back" and included that she "still wants to be friends and not strangers."

Jay

September 24, 2013 @ (Germany)

Tags: Bad breakup

Her and I were together for 5 months. It was great and all but eventually she became bossy and a snotty bitch. She would always point out y flaws, never let me have a say in anything, and she would yell at me... A lot!!! Honestly it turned to a point where I was losing it. It felt like we no longer had the same sense of humor, we would fight over the smallest things, and she was changing me to something I'm not. This girl got me into a lot of shit, she also got me in huge trouble at school (but that's another story). I did a lot for her and trust me when I say a lot.

On our last date she was being rude to me, through out the entire date she kept upsetting me. The fact that my feelings for her were deep I took every thing she said seriously. But towards the end everything bottled up and I exploded on her just dumped right there and then.

It hurt me to dump her and I never knew I had it in me to do it. Although there was bad times in our relationship there were also good. And knowing I wasn't going to be with her this summer it really sucked. That doesn't matter anymore. I must admit I miss her and I do think about her time to time. But I believe everything happens for a reason. That reason was for me to find someone better, and I did. This new relationship is so far better. It really is and throughout this new relationship we experienced more than what I experienced with my ex. I hope this new relationship will be longer than my previous ones. And to all you people in this site: please believe there will be someone for you. I promise it took me a while to realize that!!

Stephanie

June 12, 2013 @ (United States)

Tags: breakup1

He took a job abroad. It was short term. We had been together for over a year and had been through a lot. Before leaving he felt we didn't need to work out a communication plan. We would "figure it out". He hated the phone and would rarely call me. I had to ask him to call me on Christmas Day. So opted to only call me once a week and text me the rest. With communication solely on his terms, he began to accuse me of being distant. He would randomly call me and when I missed his call once he threw a fit and said I blew him off. Blew him off? I was in the bathroom.

A few weeks later I was out late with some friends. I came home and went straight to bed. The next morning he calls me, angry that I didn't text him I was going to bed, and broke up with me. This was a week before I was going to go visit him. He then texts me "you can still visit if you want." Of course, I'm not going to. Why would I visit my ex-boyfriend in a foreign land a week after he dumped me? No thanks. After telling him "no" he became enraged. He told me "I forgot you were coming out" and proceeded to give me a bunch of ultimatums ("either you come out here or I am never speaking to you again"). He wasn't begging me back, he just wanted me out there.

Then a few hours later he won't stop calling and texting me. He was crying, pleading with me. He insisted he made a mistake and wants me back. In that day he called me more than he had called me through our entire relationship. Unbelievable.

The Truth

May 09, 2013 @ (Louisiana)

Tags: Thruth, online

For the past 2 years I've been in an online relationship. My ex would always make sure I would never dishonor her trust in any way or shape. So I I'd just that for these two years. This year was my hardest year yet. With personal issues, college, and general life matters knocking at my door, I have been through hell. Then I notice my ex starts acting funny. I ask her what is wrong and she refuses to tell me. I guess if she has feelings for someone else and she said yes. Then proceeded to put said person above me and even defend him when it hit the fan.

I can never claim to be perfect. And I never will claim to be perfect. However, to have that happen on top of what has occured for me this year has wounded me immensely. I tried to reconcile and stop the eventual break up though. By constantly apologizing if only to allow us to be together again. Yet she would just blame my faults on her extremely poor and hurtful choice, and never once apologized for it or asked to work through it. Eventually I realized how dead I was to her and broke it off. The truth is that my decision was necessary because what would stop her from doing it again? More over, what would it take to feel remorse? Should I have to deal with all that with everything I've dealt with this year? So I broke it off and look towards my future. A future with family, friends, and in time, a girl I can give my heart to that deserves it. Not someone who admits the truth then lies right there after to hide the shame brought upon it.

My ex was too immature to understand how much she hurt me. By blaming me for her mistakes instead of being a woman and owning up to them, she brought this on herself. Just because she does not value herself to admit the truth does not mean the truth does not exist. I plunged my hands into the filth, while she jumped into it and refused to leave it. I cannot be with someone like that. As much as it hurts to admit it I can't, because I would have never done that to her. No matter how bad I have felt. I would have never betrayed her.

Gaia

May 02, 2013 @ (Berkeley Ca)

Tags: friendship

I met him in college. We had been through a lot with our exes but found someway to be there for each other. Our friendship started off innocent, we had no intention of being together, although i suspected we were both attracted to one another. But we were the best of friends, we spent every day together, talking, exploring, studying, struggling to eat on a broke college student's budget. He was my best friend and I could tell him any and everything. However things changed, one day when I was getting ready to head home for my sister's graduation he and I went to hang out and unexpectedly admitted our feelings for each other. I was so happy that day, i felt like flying. He told me he could imagine us being together in the future. So I went back to my hometown that night not knowing what was to happen between us but I was pleased and he was too. We gave each other butterflies and everything felt so new and fresh between us. I was in love with my best friend.
We never decided to be together, it would be too complicated for us to place a title on our feelings, he and I had just gotten out of our own relationships and thought it would be easier to hold off being together "officially" and just enjoy one another.
We experimented sexually and had a spiritual connection like no other. We had each other's back and spent every day together
But as time progressed, it became difficult for me to be stuck in uncertainty about where our relationship was headed. I began to feel insecure and jealous sometimes, in which I acknowledged and tried to solve by seeing the love in everything and everyone around us. I did not tell him about my jealousies and insecurities, because I knew those feelings were reflection of myself and my fears. However, he began to change... began pushing me away and becoming insensitive to how some of the things he did and said made me feel uncomfortable. I became sad all of the time and would cry and feel hurt.
Then one day we had a talk, I told him how I was feeling and he told me he had feelings for someone else. He was being 100% honest with me (which is a habit of ours) and also said that he did not want to go farther than just having a crush on another girl because he loved me.
Nevertheless, as the semester began to sweep me away to travelling around for work and school and family, he began to hang around the other girl more frequently in my absence. Then he told me that he told her about his feelings for him and she returned those feelings.
So I had enough. I broke things off with him, i told him that we should just be friends... I cant take feeling like this anymore. Regardless of how much we love each other. Its been an emotional roller coaster and I can't deal with it. I wish him joy and happiness and love and I hope he can figure out what he wants. Although thinking about this still makes my heart constrict and tears flood my eyes, i am moving forward. <3

Yana

April 17, 2013 @ (California)

Tags: long distance

We met through a mutual friend who was very close to both of us. Before meeting, the mutual friend actually told my ex that we were "perfect for each other".
The first few times we hung out, always in a group of friends, I thought he was cocky and full of it, but I was intensely attracted to him. One night at a party, I noticed he was kind of following me around. Every where I was in the house, he was too. He was adorable and shy, and I was forced to re-examine my first impression of him. We ended up talking for hours alone that night and we somehow intuitively knew so much about each other despite having been acquainted for such a short time. It was one of those magical moments in life when two human beings who are basically strangers really "see" each other, and love what they see.
We fell in love very quickly and intensely over the next few weeks. Time was always running away from us; he was supposed to leave the state in just a few months.
A year of long distance bullshit later, he stopped responding to me. Said he needed to have some time to himself, to figure things out. A week later he broke up with me. The reasons were never really clear but I think mostly he needed his independence to carve out his own place in the world, and he didn't feel he could do that with the pressures of our relationship. He said we were like two kids caught up in a fairy tale, and he had been hit with reality. Our fairy tale was the most important thing to me. We shared dreams of building a treehouse and living there in the wilderness with our kids and dogs and little vegetable patch. We called each other soulmates and "love of my life". I believed in it with everything I had. For me, this was my partner in life.
I was in a state of physical and emotional shock for some time after the break up. We vowed to remain close, to remain best of friends, because we both believed that love never really dies - even when two people part ways. Six months later he told me again I was his soulmate. Three days later he started to ignore me, which he has continued to do since (4 months and counting). This has truly been the most painful part of the whole experience. I believed so completely that this person, regardless of the current status of our relations, would always support and love and acknowledge me . By ignoring me, he has made me feel invisible, worthless, and crazy. Sometimes I think I made everything up in my head or that it was some crazy dream. More than I grieve for a lost lover, I grieve for the loss of a genuine connection with a person, the kind which is very rare in our world.