Searching for "july"


23 Results For 'july'

Zaria

February 01, 2013 @ (United States)

Tags: aunt's, July


Okay soooo......it was like July, last summer and i went to my aunt's for two weeks. When i was there i met this good looking guy and we started talking after i saw him at a bball game. He asked for my number and you already know i wasn't missing that opportunity!After i left we started talkin ALOT(from 9 in the morning till like maybe 2 or 3 a.m. the next day). Well in the beginning of September (on my bday) he FINALLY asked me out.
To me, he was the sweetest kid ever with smarts and a bball career on his hands (he was invited to a NIKE camp only for the top..100 players in the state i think?)Then school started up again and he was tellin me how all these different girls were tryin to flirt with him (remember this was a long distance relationship) and stuff. And my dumb self believein him smh.
Well a few months down the road that fool starts talkin about this friend of his, whos a girl, of course i think nothin of it. Then he broke up with me the weekend after Thanksgiving, for her..and im like WOW! did i really not see these signs that were RIGHT under my nose.
He'd talk about that girl all the time..but thats not the worst part. HE EXPECTED US TO STILL BE FRIENDS....come on now you've gotta be kidding! Plus the whole time i was with him he was lyin. He told me he was in honor classes..his report card said ffffff so obviously not! And he also was talkin about how he was 'sooo kool' and crap...doubt it considering he had like 50 followers on twitter...I just think u shouldnt have to lie about yourself to boost your ego...u definitely turn out looking even more stupid wen everyone finds out the truth.


       

Rogue

September 25, 2012 @ (ontario canada)

Tags: heartbroken, deserved it


Our love stories begins in September 2010. How fitting it ends now.

I will be honest and tell you that I didn't deserve his love the first year we were together and if I could find a way to take that time back. I would. A bit of history - he is 10 years younger than I (I am female). Although our maturity levels were in sync age (until recently) was never an issue. (It was something that troubled me. And because of that created unnecessary stress).

He worked full time, I was in school full time and worked two part time jobs. I have two children. One was 11 at the time the other 16. I had made the decision prior to even meeting him that I wasn't going to just introduce my kids to just anybody. I needed to know he was going to stick around. I didn't want to be one of those parents who bring partners in and out of their childrens lives. One year I told him when we met. I would introduce him after one year.

My family and friends disaproved of our relationship because it was interacial and because he was so young. I fell under the pressure. And ended it in December 2010. It didn't last long. We both loved each other and to end a relationship for others seemed wrong. Yet I always put my family and friends needs before his.

He lived 45 min away and was always ready willing and able to see me at the drop of a hat if I was free. Free time was something I didn't have much of and I soon began to resent the fact that all my time was consumed making someone happy, either my family, my children or him. I began to resent how much time he wanted from me.

I felt I had nothing to give in the first place. In May 2011 I noticed there was a girl he worked with that he was msging daily. I confronted him and he deleted her from bbm and facebook immediately no questions asked. The fact that I was uncomfortable made him do it. Why couldn't I do the same for him. I had a 20yr friend who made him uncomfortable and rightly so but I didn't do the same for him and he didn't push me. I know it hurt him.

I chose soding the back yard with family on a night we should have been together because my obligation to family was stronger to my obligation to him.

I could list several situations where this was the case. All of which now, I regret.

In july he lost his job. Money became tight and I found myself frustrated at the fact that he was playing video games all day while I worked my butt off just to make ends meet.

When september came time to meet the children my son had a death in his class, then his aunt was diagnosed with cancer and died shortly after. Excuses I know. But I wanted my son to be in a good spot prior to meeting him.

In december, he still had not met my son, still didn't work, was borrowing $$ from friends family and me who didn't have any to begin with. I ended things again.

Naturally we ended up back together in januay. But this time roles had switched. I realized how much I loved him and wanted to be with him and I was ready to share my life with him. Every aspect. The things I hesitated doing before I did without hesitation including getting rid of that 20yr friend. But now, he was distant. He was reserved. He was worried. I tried everything I could to make up for the wrongs that I had done.

The things he requested were unreasonable we both know it but I did it. Some of the things he asked me to do I am so ashamed that I did. Most, I will never tell a living soul because I am so disapointed in myself.

I hadn't seen him in 6 weeks. We hadn't slept together in 3 months, he was refusing to meet my kids still. Then on friday when I was supposed to spend the weekend at his house, he sent me a bbm msg while I was at work I am a manager of an employee and it was his first day. He didn't even give me a chance to respond before he deleted me on bbm. Blocked my emails and my phone number and I haven't heard from him since.

Why is it I love him so. Why is it I can forgive him anything now, but that first year we were together I couldn't give him what he deserved!


       

Christa

July 19, 2012 @ (Corpus Christi, Tx)

Tags: Birthday, Scumbag


First off, let me start by saying that this sounds fake, but I promise, every detail is real.

My boyfriend and I had been together for 3 years when I notices he was acting strange. We were out of state visiting his family for Christmas, when I saw he was receiving texts from the slutty secretary at 6:30 pm (well after she was off work). I couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong, so the next morning when he was in the shower, I did something I'd never done before in 3+ years together - I checked his texts. She had set him messages, wishing he was in bed with her. He blew it off, but never told her to stop. The worst part is, I work with both of them; she knows me and she knew he and I were together.

We argued all day, but promised eachother to work on our relationship.
He told me I needed to contribute more around the house (even though I work and go to school full-time), and I told him he needed to quit treating me like I was the pile of dung stuck to the bottom of his shoe.

Fast forward to February - I found out I was getting laid off April 30th. This caused alot of stress on my part, as I was losing my only source of income. I decided to use the layoff as an excuse to go to school full time, living off of whatever student loans I could get. I told him that my financial contributions would be minimal, but he was incredibly supportive.

Fast forward to April 29th - It's his birthday. I scrimped and saved from my last few paychecks and spend over $300 on him. I baked him cookies (because he preferred that over cake), and settled down at 1:00 to work on some homework. An hour later, he breaks up with me, knowing I'm losing my job the next day.

He broke up with me on his birthday, after I'd given him over $300 in gifts, knowing that the next day I'm losing my job, and have no way to support myself.

The worst part is, It's July now, and I'm still living with him because I can't afford to move out.

I can't wait for December.


       

Nicole

May 13, 2012 @ (MyHeart)

Tags: BOYFRIEND, GIRLFRIEND, STUPID, LOVE, SWEET, SAD, BEAUTIFUL, FOREVER, NEVER, HIM, HER, TOGETHER, HEART, SAD, HAPPY, CUTE, LOVE, HONEST, LIES, GUYS, GIRLS, HE, SHE, PRETTY, NEVER. NOW, CUTE. LOSER, JERK


Dear Forever, <3
You don't exist, never will you, never have you, only in the mind of someone blinded by love. Love isn't forever, If you have it you should know you are one luck person. 1 out of 1000 people find true love, I am not one of them sadly. Do I wish to be, yes I do indeed. Is it relevant you ask? Yes, completely honestly faithfully truly relevant from day one. You may say I had a typical relationship, did I think it was typical? Nope, I thought it was completely something irrelevant from that. I though he was different, you may say a lot of girls say that, but I believed it, dreamed it, thought it, loved it, carried it, and anything under the sun, blue moon, and starts, and the heaven above.. I loved him with all my heart. I'd do anything for him, yet all I could do was nothing. I started dating his cousin who I fell completely head over heels with. We only saw each other at school to be honest.. but I thought it was more than a fun, school romance. I thought I wanted him forever. Though he cheated on a girl 8 times to be exact, but more after that. I hated the girl, he cheated on me to be with her. He told us it was because we were alike, whoa there we didn't think that. I hated her, she hated me, I had the boobs, and butt, she had nothing. I was thick, she was... skinny, so skinny she has nothing. I had the cutest everything compared to him, but at the end she had him... and I was left with nothing from him but good memories from before. Did anything from before matter anymore? No. Did the fact I was better than her in body, to everything else? No. Because she had him, I wanted him, I wanted to be her, live her life, be where she is. She and I became friends, and talked all the time. We soon learned we were exactly alike nothing different. She and I, been through the same thing, going through the same thing, like the same things, almost exactly the same person. Except the fact we lived different lives, as in our on bodys. Even though we were almost completely the same person, I was still jealous of her for the longest. Because she had him? Nope, not this time. Because I thought she was better, prettier, which she was prettier. we may have almost been completely a like, but our appearance and body kept us separated. I was me, she was herself. Later, I got over him. I realized I deserve better, I need better, I want better, and better is what I will get. If she wanted to spend her life with him and get less than what she could have, need, or want, she can nobody will stop her not at all. Not me, her parents, herself, anyone. Not even him. As long as he could break her heart he was completely fine. Was she, yes because she loved him no matter what, kinda like I was. Later, I fell for someone else, that someone was him cousin. He was the same age as him, same grade, but different everything else. We never met, but we started talking June 3rd, We talked and talked, till we decided we liked each other. We had talk a lot before then, he was obsessed with the fact that he was in love with me, which if you promise not to tell, I loved that(;. I thought he wasn't. Till 06.12.11 the day we got together, we dated than 2 months later, we met. He had never kissed a girl, nor had a long relationship. I saw him that day, I was so nerves, so I paced back and forth at the mall.. I thought he'd see me and be like she's prettier on facebook... and things like I'm worthless. But of course as always he was such a sweet little cutie. <3 It was the best day. As time proceeded we didn't hang out til July 3rd Thunder Fest of course. As always it was the cutest thing. We dated til 5.5.12 Which was like a week and 2 days ago, 9 days to be exact. So, we dated for 11 months, almost. His birthday was May 11th. Of course on that day he was probably like, "It's my birthday I'll get high if I want to, can't deny that I want you, but I'll lie if I have to." - Drake lyrics. But of course he actually didn't want me. I've been thinking of him and I can't stop. It's my longest relationship, and I didn't want it to end. What do you thinks he's doing? Flirting with a new girl? Probably with a new girl? Hanging with a new girl? Doing better without me? Do you even think he thinks about me? Well, I wouldn't know. Want to know why? Because he wont talk to me. Everyday breaks my heart. I get by, by pretending no matter what day, hour, second, weather, or place he's thinking about me. He's dying inside, and I'm living under sunshine, and he's living in the dark shadowy days of breaking my heart. Sometimes I hope that whoever he is messing with now, as in flirting with.. they break his heart, but now I just hope that he's happy until "It's a beautiful day, and something reminds you, you wish you would have stayed." - Taylor Swift lyrics. And now that is the time I found out that forever only exist with a few people.
Love,
Nicole, <3


       

Roxana

March 03, 2012 @ (Atlanta)

Tags: Matthew, John


So basically I used to date a guy, let's call him Mark, for almost 2 years. In the meanwhile his best friend and I were getting super close. You see Mark was a very possessive and religious person and would really get on my nerves. Moreover I could not trust him as he would spill all of my secrets and said some pretty personal things to others about me :/

So John (the best friend) was nice to me and comforting and we would occasionally hold hands. My friend Matthew, who is currently my best guy mate, would tell me to break up with Mark..

Eventually John was a bastard and spread a rumour around school that I was cheating on Mark with him and well I dumped Mark.

Fast forward to 7 months later and I started dating John even though he was really horrible and mean. Throughout the relationship he would ignore me, would not tell me where he was headed, and basically really hurt me. Matthew was upset as he told me that John was using me.

Things were pretty intimate with John, but one day, out of the blue, he said and I quote 'I was only with you to use you.. and anyway I'm not ready for a relationship bla bla bla... Its me not you'

This happened in July and it is now February.. he has a girlfriend and seems so loved up with her.. I have a boyfriend who loves me and respects me and cherishes me for who I am.. The day after John dumped me I went out with my best friend but after some intense make out sessions he decided that he doesnt want to be more than friends..

So that's the story of my life

Roxana


       

Zach

February 14, 2012 @ (Canada)

Tags: Best Friend, Messy, Life Goes on,


So I've been through a lot this past year and I feel like I am falling into the same pattern. It all started when I came out of the closet in February of 2008, my best friend didn't really know how to handle it. I could tell that he really wasn't okay with it, what I didn't know was that it was because he was actually gay too. So a few months after I came out out he eventually told me he was fine with it, and it was one of the happiest moments of my life. As time passed I noticed a change in him and then in July of 2009 he came out to me, and my reaction was well a little surprised. I never would have thought he was ever gay, he tried so hard to conceal that he was gay, he even dated and slept with girls, so it took some real evidence to prove that he wasn't messing with me. So he told me about the guy he had been seeing and it was all fine and dandy. Since I had met my best friend I always found him attractive, but now he was actually available. Summer turned to fall and soon enough he told me that he wasn't gay anymore, that 'it was a lifestyle choice he didn't wish to pursue.' I didn't believe him then and I don't believe him now mostly because I've seen him on a gay dating site recently. But never the less I still really liked him. He showed me this dating site that he used to meet guys and he signed me up, even though 'he wasn't gay anymore' he always insisted that I go out and meet guys, he was rather adamant which I found a bit odd, considering he was never interested in my love life before. Things began to get messy when he started to act out and act well a little recklessly, mostly because we and all of our friends were turning 19 and could start drinking, so he'd drive drunk, and he would do just do the dumbest things. This behavior went on for a year which brings us to 2011. 2011 was a very hard year for me. One day in the middle of July and I don't know the exact date, but he came over with some stuff I left at his house and he handed the items to me. I asked what was wrong and if he wanted to get a coffee, and he said 'Why would we do that?' and I said 'Because we're friends' and he replied 'Are we?' After that he turned away and I never saw him again. A month later I found out it was because I had feelings for him and that he had told all of our friends that I was a liar and horrible friend, that I was somehow delusional and that I had gone around spreading lies that he was gay when I told maybe 2 people who didn't say a word. So in the end he turned out to just be a coward who was trying to save his own ass who didn't care who he hurt in the process. Its been 7 months and I still haven't spoken or seen him, in the end I realized he would never have the courage to tell people how he really felt about anything or that he would never have the courage to tell anyone that he was a homosexual, and sometimes I feel like I may have hindered that. But its not always going to be my fault the blame will fall on him and all the lies and all the pettiness will catch up to him and everyone will see him for what he is. I won't vilify him and he shouldn't vilify me, we were both in our own ways wrong. I don't miss him anymore, I don't even want to be friends with him, mostly because of this one simple fact, I was his best friend and he always told me we would be friends no matter what, and I think to myself;I was hi best friend and look what he did to me? Why would I want to be friends with such a selfish person? Who put his own need to hide a silly secret above my feelings, I guess I wasn't as important to him as he liked to say, because if I was he would have at least talked to me and tried to work it out. I won't ever go back because I know if I did everything would be like it was before, he wouldn't respect me and it would be a misrealble disaster.

I'm moving on and more and more I am forgeting him, it started in September when I realized I couldn't remember the sound of his voice or his laugh, then things about him started to slip, and now I am starting to forget what he looked like, I feel like one day I'll need to grab a picture to remember him.


       

Shitfacegurl

December 13, 2011 @ (Sweden)

Tags: broke relationship, miss, him


It all started at the end of 9th grade, when I was 15 years old, he was in my french class but i never noticed him much, until he added me on facebook and there it all began! We talked for hours and hours 2 hours went to 5-6 hours, but I never dared talking to him in person, because I was to shy. After we graduated from ninth grade, we still kept in touch and we had our first date in July that summer and, already that night he asked if I wanted to be his girlfriend but I said I didn't wanted that yet, and later on after 2 weeks at our second date,i was childish and when he told me his hands were cold and i told him " I know what you're up to" and i held his hand and i told him so are we together now, and since 23-11-10 , we became a couple. We kept it a secret and everything was perfect! Then after 3 months I admitted that I wasn't that in to him from the beginning, I've realized today, that i should never do something before i give it a further thought. And he broke up with me and I tried to convince him to get back together, but he said he didn't trusted me, but we got back together. And then 3 months further he broke up again because he felt I treated him badly, like a bitch and stuff but then again I convinced to get back together and we did. I never realized my mistakes,before its to late! Then since then its been an down hill roller coaster. I did the most dumbest thing ever on our 1st year anniversary, i broke up with him, because he avoided me for a whole week and we fought. It was another mistake. A day later we talked and we got back together again, then 2 months later we fought, and his best friend told me to call my boyfriend and talk about it, but it ended badly and we broke up over the phone, and then we got back again and 2 months ahead, which is by today, we had an argument a week ago and he told me our sex is bad and he was sick of the relationship and we broke up and got back together at the same time, and now its been 5 days since he broke up with me again because I've been grumpy, and bitchy whenever he mentions something i dislike. We didn't talked for 2 days and then he texted me and we argued even more and few hours later he texted back he missed me and i missed him to ofc! And we had a stable conversation and decided to be single and figure things out, but the next day i already asked him if he had decided,what we should do and he told me ladies first, and I've been thinking of it, and I told me it would be better being single, since I've hurt him many times and I was scared and his respond, was just lot of mean,harsh,hurtful words and he said i should give him back all his presents, and that would be a sign its over. But I never handed them over, I still wear the necklace he gave me.
It has been 5 days now, and im going crazy, we have so much in-common and have this good communication with each other, we could text and talk for 12 hours or the whole day exactly, without getting sick of each other.
He has been special to me, since the first time I meet him, I wanted to get to know him, since the day we became a couple, I've changed, i know I'm only 17 now but i love him so much, he was really good to me, he was there whenever i needed him and just stood out with whatever emotion i had, and spoiled me even though i never asked him for much, and he was a gentlemen, except when we argued, he would turn into a huge jerk. Despite all that we've been through, i didn't understood him well before, after all we've been trough over a year now and 4 months, we've handled many things together, and i've supported him with everything we did, even woke up at 5 am and surprised him at the train station just coz i missed him so much <3. Its hard breaking up, i miss him and ive been crying ever since, and i cant even eat properly or even concentrate on things, he is always on my mind. It feels like I've lost him forever, but I still want to hear from him in a few days.


       

Poor Guy

December 01, 2011 @ (India)

Tags: long distance, long relation


I ended my 7 year long relation few days back.It started when I was 16. A high school romance...butterflies in the stomach and stuff...We went to college to different cities but it kept on. She was in a girl's college with no guys around. She used to come to meet me sometimes but meetings were rare and it took months for us to meet. We kept together by phone and occassional meetings. I was too emotionally attached to her and felt the same for her as well. Years passed, I thought our love grew stronger. We were different people. I was very ambitious and a little introvert. She was a complete extrovert, liked attention and was not much into career. During college I found a few girls who I thought were more mature than she was but I loved her for what she was, never ever thought of snapping it...Over the years I created an illusion(atleast now I feel so) that she was the one and we are together for eternity. I faced some really difficult time in 2010 and she was rock solid by my side.My love and respect grew for her. I reciprocated in the same way. Being by her side everytime. She said she respected me for that. Finally we got a job in the same city and after 4 long years we were together again. Could meet. I felt complete. I thought our relation was evolving. I got more serious. Told my family. She did the same.(not Mom and dad, but others).I was very happy with her. I felt she was happy with me as well. In july, I got busy with an office assignment, she said she was busy as well.I did not care as I trusted her. In october I was out of the country for work. We were talking still.Perfectly fine. No issues. I came back in November. It was her birthday on 6th. I wanted to be with her 24x7 and told her so. She agreed. But on 4th, she called me and said she wanted to party with friends. After some discussion and my failed attempts to change her mind, it was agreed that she would party with her friends. I was sad. But still wanted to be with her. On her Bday night, I found her lying to me about a guy's call the other night.He was an office colleague whom she knew for 6 months.Trvial issue I thought, we discussed and she said she shouldn't have lied, apologised. I was happy. But to my surprise I caught her lying again. Same day. I was angry. We talked and she confessed that she kissed that guy on her bday. She told it to be an impulsive one and only a one time thing..I asked her to choose between the guy and me. To my freaking surprise she said she is having a strong feeling towards him. I was miserable. I somehow persuaded her to meet me and not think of snapping a 7 year relation just like that. We met the next day, talked.I was so scared that night that I slept holding her hand and kept murmuring,"Please, dont go, dont go" and she kept telling me she wont. She agreed that she made a mistake and she must stop it. But somehow, she was not happy. After a long discussion the next day, she confessed that her bday was not the first time and she had been cheating on me while I was out of the country in October. I was broken. We used to talk every day then and she had no guilt. Nothing. I asked her to forget him and come back. But she did not. She said she could not stop talking to him.. She gave up a 7 year relation for a guy whom she knows just for 5 months. The guy knew about it all around that she was committed. Yet....I feel horrible right now. All the time I was out, I kept telling people that she's waiting for me to get back..she was even calling me and telling me that she missed me and wanted me back soon. But in reality she was in someone else's arms. I don't know if I would ever be able to forget this. I don't know if I would ever be able to love anyone now..I could not believe it..I mean it was all OK for me till 6th, not even the slightest hint.I was buying stuff for her bday.and on 9th, it was over....I feel broken...and find solace only in alcohol


       

Jayleen

May 17, 2011 @ (e.c)

Tags: idk?


hi my name is jayleen and im 13 years old and this is how the it all happened:last year (2010) a boy named carlos wanted to be my friend and then after a while when we started to get to know eachother more , he asked me out 3 times just for me to say yes ; and one day on april 27,2010 we were talking over the phone and i was talking and then out of nowhere he cut me off and asked me out and then i said i dont know i have to think about it because you know that i have no feelings for you in that way and then and then he said aww okay i guess and then i said dont be sad just text me or call me tomorrow and i will tell you my answer and then he said okay and thats when we had hung up and then the next day,while i was at school,he texted me and the text said "hey this is carlos so whats your answer"and then i said my answer is yes and then he said he loved me and then i said i love you too and then after a while later (days,weeks)thats when i really started to fall hard for him and then so 2 months had passed and we got into an arguement and i got to that point where i was really mad and just blew up and started saying things that i didnt mean and then i said "its over im done with you carlos!!"and then he said okay and then thats when i finally realized what i have done and then i started crying my heart out! and i was crying so much and bad that i couldnt breathe and cried myself to sleep and then the next night,he texted me saying"are we really over?"i texted him back saying yes why? and then he said oh okay because im gonna ask out your best friend and then i said who is my best friend and then he said winoska and when he said that,that really hurt me more than me breaking up with him and i started crying so much and bad that my heart broke into a billion pieces! and even though he wasnt my first boyfriend,he was the first boy i ever loved and cried for and i never knew what love was until i met him i was 12 years old in the 5th grade until i knew what love was and that was because he showed me what love was and he proved to me that he was different from the other boys i ever dated and everyday since we broke up,(july 11,2010)i cry myself to sleep until this very day and i regret ever leaving him but i didnt know that i needed him until i left him! and i have full experience on what love is that i learned from a very young age and when i tell people this story,they cried


       

Brandee

December 27, 2010 @ (Boulder City Nevada)

Tags: Cameron Cuny


Let's see. It's December... 6months ago.

I was dating this doucher, and I met someone online.He was, perfect? No, perfect is an under-state-ment. Anywys, we fell in love. We both did, instantly.

God, I'm getting flash backs; we celebrated Fourth of July together. July 3rd we met and fell inlove, and became the greatest relationship ever. Hours and Hours on the phone, everynight. Webcams, phones, Im's. But, everyone was right.. Long distance doesn't work.

Anyways... We were amazing, but we only lasted a short time. I remember the breakup so vividly. I was high off of life, hanging out with my best friend, walking home, and as I passed the alleyway across the way from my alley, I got a phone call from my baby. I remember him talking to his buddy breifly, and then getting serious. He just explained to me that it wasn't working. He then asked, if I was alright, and with tears in my eyes, I replied yes. He told me if I needed to cry I could.

Oh I needed to cry alright. But I told him I didn't want him to have to hear it for, I didn't want him to feel bad. I told him I had to go...

My friend Devin was concerned.

I turned around, facing away from her, and cried, silent at first.

I tried to walk, i was so shaken, I couldn't walk, so I stumbled and fell. I sat against the wall, and Devin rushed over. I just started to scream. I couldn't breath, and I was screaming. Devin helped me up while I was still bawling, and she hugged me. I was so crushed. It felt as if he took a kife, rammed it into my heart, and then twisted the blade. After about an hour, I regained enough of my composure to get home..
As sooon as I was in my room, I began to cry again. I turned up my music and cried. After like... roughly 3 hours, Devin went home. I never stopped crying.

I did something I have never done before too.
I became numb. I was in such denial. It was so not over.

I couldn't even feel my heartbeat anymore, and pathetically, I cut myslef. I didn't want to die, I was making sure I was still alive.

He called me. I swear, I just sat there, with the phone muted, crying, screaming, not breathing. he was apologizing. Which broke my heart even more, causing me more pain.

This was the first guy, the first person I have ever felt love for, and he does this too mee? I would tell everyone exactly why he broke up with me, stupid reson, but I don't want to be mean. Why would anyone do this to me? My first real true heart break.. and it still haunts me. 6 MONTHS LATER! Why?

I have cried so many times, just at random, and if any of my friends even say his name, itnsta-cry. Little things remind me of him. Especially the song, It's Not Over- Second HandSerenade. I have listened to it atleast 100 times in the last couple hours. It's 3:46 in the morning.. I have officially been crying for 3 hours. Yay. what an accomplishment. Are you happy Cameron? Knowing that the fucking thought of you makes me cry. And when i do cry, I can't breath. I put myself through hell, for you. And what's even worse... I still love you.

-Brandee.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZmvJknzLfU&feature=related